


Ready For love Again?

by roo2010



Series: My Life with Tom [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe RPF
Genre: Actor Tom Hiddleston, F/M, Fanfiction, Fluff, Love, My First Fanfic, Romance, slightly AU
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-02
Updated: 2018-03-09
Packaged: 2018-03-20 22:14:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 128
Words: 188,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3667176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/roo2010/pseuds/roo2010
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Young widow Jackie had all but given up on finding love again, on her own with a teenage daughter the chances seemed remote and a lack of faith in herself meant that she was wondering if she would ever be ready for love again. That was until a chance meeting changed her life forever!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, welcome to my first fanfic. I've been writing this for over a year now and have finally plucked up the courage to post it, however updates may be sporadic as I'm keeping this a secret from my husband and so can only post when he is not around.  
> I'm also posting this on Wattpad. This is dedicated to all of you on here whose stories I have enjoyed since I joined this site. Thank you for all your wonderful stories and I hope mine is half as good as yours.  
> Hope you enjoy it.
> 
> Roo

Ch. 1.  
If anyone had told me as I shut the door of my pretty little cottage that spring morning that my life would never be the same again I wouldn’t have believed them, just goes to show what I know.

I had an unexpected day off work so I was off to my nearest city for the day. I am a single mother with a 14½ years old daughter. My husband Sean died 9 years ago and left me on my own with our Lizzie. I still missed Sean and I supposed I always would but life goes on. I’d sold our house - too many memories for me there and moved in with my parents so that Elizabeth, my daughter, would be cared for when I was at work, I worked shifts in the laboratory of a factory that made puddings. It was hard going but we managed. Then, one terrible day 2 years ago Mum and Dad were killed in a car crash. It wasn’t their fault; the other driver was drunk, lost control of his car and slammed into them. They died instantly and left me on my own again, well apart from Lizzie of course. I was left everything in their wills, but again too many memories meant me selling the family home. I didn’t go far though, there was a little cottage down a lane off the road they lived on, the road I grew up on, that I’d always wanted to live in. I saw it was up for sale and moved in, with Lizzie, then 12. I had to change my shifts at work so that I only worked 8am to 4pm now and though I’d taken a pay cut we were comfortable. Lizzie went to the local comprehensive, luckily there was a bus stop on the main road so transport wasn’t an issue, she was happy there and more importantly she was never on her own for too long between her getting home from school and me getting home from work. She obviously missed her Dad and her grandparents and never complained too much but she was still very much a teenager.  
I smiled to myself as I got into my car; I was going to buy her a present. Thor: The Dark World had been released on DVD at the beginning of the week and I was off to get it for her as a surprise. She was a huge Marvel fan and had all of the DVDs so far. I drove to the beautiful city of Bath and as usual used the Park and Ride scheme to get into the City Centre. It was a wonderful spring day, the snowdrops and daffodils in the planters were swaying in the slight breeze moving through the shopping centre and the sun was warm on my back. I was wearing my usual casual trousers and T shirt, nothing special and just enjoying the fact that I had a day off work. I strolled among the crowds and the shops, smiling to myself as I picked out the varied languages and accents that you always hear in Bath- lots of Americans, a few French, Chinese and Japanese being the main ones.


	2. Chapter 2

Ch. 2  
As I wandered through The Abbey Yard I decided to text Lizzie to tease her about what I was about to buy for her. Head down, concentrating on my phone and so not looking where I was going I bumped into something solid. The jolt and the quick step back caused my weak ankle to give out and I fell awkwardly onto the paving stones.  
“Oh my gosh, are you ok?” said a voice above me and I realised I’d walked into a someone not a something!  
“Yes” I replied “I’m fine thanks” scrabbling around on the floor for my phone and bag that had gone flying in my tumble.  
“Here, let me help you up” said the voice, the rather nice slightly gravelly voice, and a hand came into view. I grasped it gratefully. The grip was gentle but firm and I let my gaze move up the arm to the face above. I may have let out a small squeak! Looking down at me was a very handsome man; he was very tall with short reddish/brownish wavy hair, amazing cheekbones and beautiful blue eyes. I opened my mouth again but no sound came out. The face above me started to look a bit worried. I shut my mouth and tried again.  
“Are you… are you Tom Hiddleston?” I managed to squeeze out. His face broke into a beautiful genuine smile.  
“Yes I am and you really shouldn’t still be sitting in the floor. Here let me help you up!  
He pulled me gently and steadily to my feet but as I put my bad ankle on the ground it gave way again and I stumbled briefly. Quick as a flash both his arms were around my waist steadying me so I didn’t fall again.  
“You’re hurt!” he sounded worried  
I’m ok” I said “I just have an ankle that give out every now and again” I smiled reassuringly at him. “Thank you for your help Mr Hiddleston” I said, he pulled a face  
“Oh please call me Tom!”  
“Well then Tom” I said shyly “my name is Jackie and it’s a pleasure to meet you”  
“The pleasure is all mine” he replied, “Here, let’s get you sat down properly”  
Because we were in the Abbey Yard there were plenty of pavement cafes nearby, we headed for the nearest one, him tall and strong and me hobbling along fangirling gently inside. I mean it’s not every day you get to meet an international film star. He went inside and ordered coffee and cake “for the shock” he said and I hid a small smile, well everyone that knows anything about him knows about his sweet tooth! We sat drinking the coffee and eating the cakes and just chatting. Honestly five minutes after starting to chat I felt like I’d know him forever. He was witty and oh so charming I was telling him about myself before I knew what I was doing. I told him about Sean, and Mum and Dad and Lizzie and how we got by. He asked what I did for a living and his eyes lit up at that. Tom’s face was so expressive it was amazing I know he’s an actor and all but even so, he looked genuinely sorry when I told him about Sean and my parents and yet I was a stranger to him. I suddenly realised what the time was  
“Oh my goodness I have to go” I said “Lizzie will be expecting me soon”  
Tom looked slightly sad “Really?” he said  
“Afraid so” I replied “it means a lot to her when there are only two of us” he nodded his acceptance  
“Ok” he said “but before you leave…” he hesitated “can I have your number?”  
I was completely shocked at that but gave him my number anyway thinking that he probably collects phone numbers every day and never uses them so what was the harm? I stood up carefully but my ankle was fine and took my weight thank goodness.  
“Oh poot!” I exclaimed as Tom raised an eyebrow at me “I forgot to get Lizzie her new DVD, I was going to get her Thor: The Dark World as a surprise but I’ve no time to get it now, oh well it will wait” I explained. I turned to face Tom squarely.  
“It was really nice meeting you Tom” I said “thanks for the coffee and the cake”  
He stood up and in two long strides was round my side of the table, he reached down and gently grasped my hand and raised it to his lips. I got goose bumps, nobody, not even Sean had made me feel that special. I drove home with a huge smile on my face which I had to try and get rid of before I got there. I couldn’t let Lizzie know who I’d had coffee with; my life would be unbearable with her wanting ALL the details


	3. Chapter 3

Ch. 3  
When Lizzie went to her friend’s house on Saturday I phoned my best and only real friend Louise and told her all about my surprising encounter. To be honest I think she took it all with a pinch of salt. I mean I’m not sure I believed it myself and I was there! As soon as I was off the phone to Louise my mobile started my text alert, as usual I looked round for the T.A.R.D.I.S. and as usual was disappointed when it did not materialise, that was until I saw the text, it was from an unknown number and it read:-  
**Hello Jackie, it’s Tom H here. I hope you don’t mind me texting you? I just wanted to make sure you were ok after your tumble yesterday**   
I quickly replied  
_Hello Tom, I don’t mind at all. I’m fine thanks for asking and thanks again for all your help and kindness yesterday. Jackie_   
The response came back  
**Jackie, that’s good news. I was wondering what you were up to today? T x**  
Tom Hiddleston wants to know what I’m doing and has sent me a little kiss! I responded  
_Not much today Tom, Lizzie is at a friend’s so I’m just mooching round the cottage .J x_  
Two can play at that game I thought. Then my mobile started ringing and it was the same number as the texts. I took two deep breaths before I answered

 “Hello” I said trying to sound casual  
“Hello Jackie” came the voice that sounded like honey and silk “texting was taking too long so I thought I’d ring instead. Hope you don’t mind?”  
“No. I don’t mind at all” I said dying gently inside  
“So not up to much today then?” he asked  
“No, nothing much” I replied “You?”  
“I’ve got to go to a meeting for my new play soon but hopefully that won’t take too long and then I’m not sure” he said. And then completely out of the blue “Are you attached by any chance?”  
Wow I did not see that coming!  
“No” I replied “I haven’t really been looking and I don’t suppose that anyone wants to get to know a widow with a teenage daughter”  
Oh gosh, that sounded bitter!  
“I do” he said. I nearly dropped my phone!  
“Pardon?”  
“I said I do” Tom repeated.  
Wow I wasn’t hearing things. The Tom Hiddleston had just told me that he wanted to get to know me better.  
“Oh” I squeaked “Right, um ….. “  
“Are you ok?” he asked, concern tinging his voice.  
“Yes, fine, just processing unexpected information” I gushed.  
“I see” he said with a smile, and then a small sigh “look, can we agree that I’m just an ordinary man, because believe it or not I am, and can we go out somewhere, maybe tomorrow, to give you time to come to terms with this?”  
“I’d love to” I said with hesitancy in my voice.  
“But?” he questioned.  
“It’s Lizzie, she’s a huge fan of yours, bigger than I am, and I think to be fair to both of you your first meeting should not be in public!”  
“Oh ok” he sighed and I could tell he was really disappointed. I thought quickly.  
“Tom, that wasn’t a ‘No’ you realise? I’ll tell you what” I said before he could answer “Why don’t you come over to us for Sunday Lunch tomorrow? Then you and Lizzie can meet in private and it’s only us three that might be embarrassed”  
“I like that idea” he said sounding far more cheerful already.  
“Ok” I replied “I’ll text you my address, come over anytime you’re ready in the morning.”  
“That’s fine” he enthused “I’ll see you tomorrow. Bye for now”  
“Bye” I replied and we ended the call. I quickly sent Tom my address and then went to check what I could give him for lunch. A roast dinner, obviously, probably chicken with all the trimmings and then, of course, the dessert. Rummaging through my recipe file I found a recipe for Mousse au Chocolat, which I thought would be perfect. I checked what I needed and dashed to the supermarket. There was still a part of me that refused to believe what was happening, it just seemed too far-fetched, but I thought I’d better make an effort in case I wasn’t dreaming. When I got back from the shops Lizzie was home and I asked her to help me tidy the front room and bathroom because we would have a guest for lunch the next day. When she asked who I just told her that it was someone I’d met recently. I didn’t even mention if that someone was male or female, she would find out soon enough.  
    The next morning I got up and checked the mousse I’d made the night before, it still looked good. I went upstairs, had a quick bath and washed my hair. I kept it short so there was no problem with styling it and then tried to decide what to wear. I settled for a long, flowing royal blue skirt and a contrasting shocking pink top, with a faux shirt underneath, that had blue accents. Satisfied with how I looked I went downstairs to start preparing lunch.


	4. Chapter 4

 

Ch. 4

 

       Just as I was putting the chicken in the oven my phone rang. I glanced at the clock, it was just gone 10am, when I checked the caller ID it was Tom. My heart sank, he had decided not to come to lunch after all and he was phoning to let me know. I pressed the answer button.

“Hello Jackie” Tom’s voice was an interesting mix of excitement and frustration. “Where’s this lane of yours? I’ve gone up and down the road three times now, I’m sure people will start getting suspicious!”

I supressed a giggle “I’ll walk to the top of the lane and meet you” I said “give me a minute.”

I walked to the top of the lane and looked up and down the road, and then I saw him. He was driving a new Jaguar F type in British Racing Green with the top down. Tom was wearing a button down white shirt, smart black trousers and designer sunglasses and looked sensational. I waved and he gave me an answering wave and a huge beaming smile as he drove up. As I was about to get in the car to direct him to the cottage he leaned over and moved a beautiful bunch of flowers, grinning madly he said “These are for you”

“Oh wow” I said “thank you very much” and I got in the car.

“I hope you don’t mind” he said “but I bought something for Lizzie too”

I smiled at him “I don’t mind” I replied “she’ll be thrilled. By the way I haven’t told her it’s you yet; I thought I’d last longer if she didn’t know!”

“Ok” he smiled, “Shall we go then?”

Tom drove the short distance down the lane and parked in front of my garage. The cottage was the only property on the lane, so no one would know Tom was at my house.

As we got to the front door I said, “You’d better brace yourself for this bit”

“It’s ok” he replied slightly nervously “I brought my secret weapon” and he showed me what he had bought Lizzie. It was Thor: The Dark World on DVD and, of course, he had signed it.

I looked him in the eye, “Well it might help” I said “or it could make things slightly worse, Ah well, here we go!” and I opened my front door and we stepped into the hallway.

“Lizzie” I called upstairs, “Our guest is here. Can you come down please?”

     A pair of legs appeared at the top of the stairs and started to descend, revealing my beautiful daughter. She looked so much like me I hardly ever had to tell anyone she was mine, they could tell just by looking. As she got closer I could see her trying to make out who was standing just behind me, but because Tom was so tall, she couldn’t get a proper look until she reached the foot of the stairs.

“Hi” she said

“Hi yourself” Tom replied in that, oh so distinctive voice of his.

Lizzie looked perplexed; you could see the thought process whirring < I know that voice, why do I know that voice?> She eventually looked Tom in the eye. Her eyes travelled all over his face and then dropped to the DVD he was holding in his hands in front of him so that she could see the title. She looked again at Tom’s face and back down to the DVD and then she went very, very pale, she swayed gently on her feet and fell in a graceful heap at the foot of the stairs. Well she would have done but Tom caught her first and laid her gently on the floor. Soon enough she came round.

“I do seem to have the strangest effect on the women of this household” he chuckled “they keep falling at my feet!”

Lizzie looked up at him, but didn’t really see, she was still feeling a bit odd. Tom helped her to her feet slowly and looked to me for guidance. I led the way to the front room and Lizzie sank to the sofa. I went to get her a glass of water and when I returned some colour had come back to her cheeks.

“Surprise!” I said, “Now you know who our lunch guest is!” Tom flashed her one of his trademark smiles and handed her the DVD he had retrieved from the hallway.

“So very pleased to meet you, Lizzie” he said and lifted her hand to his lips. I had a feeling it was a good job she was still sitting down.

          After making sure Lizzie was ok I went back to the kitchen to finish preparing lunch. Tom followed me and took a seat at the table; he didn’t stay there long before he was up helping me with lunch despite my protests. We chatted as we worked and I learnt so much about the *real* Tom. I was amazed how much he opened up to me. He told me about his family and early life, how he’d started acting and how lucky he’d been in his life. The only time I sent him out of the room was when I wanted to decorate the pudding; I wanted to keep that a surprise.

When lunch was ready we all sat at the kitchen table and settled down to eat. Lizzie was being so polite I was beginning to wonder where the real Lizzie had gone.

“Mr Hiddleston….” She started. Tom looked at her kindly. “Call me Tom please Lizzie. I can tell we are going to be friends already”

Lizzie blushed heavily “Ok, Tom can you pass the stuffing please?” “Of course” he said and did so.

Lizzie smiled bravely and unbent a little bit. We chatted some more during the main course, mainly Lizzie quizzing Tom about some of the films he’d been in. the conversation flowed free and easy and I thought there might even be the start of a tenuous friendship forming here. It was soon time for desert and Tom’s eyes were as round as saucers when he saw the home made mousse, after his first spoonful he closed his eyes in bliss and a broad smile spread across his features

“Nice?” I asked knowing the answer already.

“Fantastic” he replied “I’ve never tasted anything so nice that wasn’t in a restaurant”

           High praise indeed and I smiled at him as he finished his portion. Lunch finished we loaded the dishwasher and returned to the front room. There really was no choice about what happened next. The new DVD had to go on! Lizzie and I looked across Tom apprehensively as Loki appeared on screen for the first time. For those of you not in the know, for his first scene Loki is in chains in front of Odin. We see a back view if the prisoner party and Loki had a metal belt around his waist, with chains at the back held by the guards. The chains frame Loki’s posterior perfectly and we call the scene ‘butt chains’. We just looked at each other and burst out laughing as the scene started and then, of course, we had to explain why we were laughing to Tom! I’m not sure he’d ever had such an intimate audience to watch one of his films with, especially ones who knew so much of the back story already, and he did look a little worried at first, but he soon realised that no harm was intended, we truly loved Loki and Tom both and he settled down and relaxed. He slouched down slightly between us and opened his legs in ‘classic Tom’ pose and enjoyed the rest of the movie, chipping in interesting tidbits of information.

          My favourite bit was when Thor had released Loki from the Asgard dungeons and they were walking along a corridor with Loki using his magic to ‘disguise’ them. The part where he is Captain America cracks me up, and of course Tom was there to give us the background info on that scene. And I just had to comment that it was a shame that they hadn’t left his version in! When the film was over Lizzie and I both told Tom how brilliant it was, and that we’d actually gone to see it at the cinema a couple of times when it had come out. Tom seemed really flattered and stammered a thanks. As it was still quite early we let Tom choose the next film and I went out into the kitchen to make some fruit scones for tea which were, of course, served with jam and clotted cream whilst we watched The Jungle Book and all sang along to all the songs. When that was over Lizzie excused herself and went to have a bath and get ready for bed and Tom and I just talked about everything and nothing, really I was amazed how much we had in common.

         Sadly it was eventually time for Tom to go back to his hotel in Bath, we stood on the doorstep for what seemed like ages, finally Tom gave me a perfectly gentlemanly peck on the cheek, got into his car and drove away, waving merrily out of the open top car. I got a text from him when he got back to his hotel room it simple read

**Hi Jackie, I had a fantastic time today, next week my treat! T x**

I was really flattered and text back

_Sure thing, that would be great J x x_

I was amazed I got to sleep that night; I was so happy and excited for the next Sunday.


	5. Chapter 5

Ch. 5  
            The next week passed as normal. I’d decided not to tell anyone but Louise about Tom as I doubted anyone would believe me and, surprisingly, Lizzie did the same at school. I was very proud of the way she respected Tom’s privacy like that. Tom text me every day and I began to realise that this may end up being more than just a casual friendship. I wasn’t sure how I felt about that in all honesty as since Sean had died I hadn’t ever contemplated having another man in my life and I wasn’t sure if I would ever be ready for love again. I did however find myself hoping that Tom could find it in himself to be patient and slow with me, as I couldn’t think of a better person to lead me back into that world.  
             By the time Sunday came around Lizzie had managed to organise a sleepover for herself with a friend who would also get her to school on the Monday so I didn’t have to pick her up Sunday evening. The more thought I gave it the more it seemed that she didn’t have a problem with me seeing a man again, or maybe only if that man was a certain Tom Hiddleston! The man himself arrived promptly at 10 o’clock on the Sunday morning and knocked on the cottage door, he was dressed beautifully as usual in a dark suit and tie with a white shirt. I was wearing a summer dress with a dainty floral print and a white jacket. He gave me a kiss on the cheek and wished me good morning. I smiled at him and wished him a good morning back as he opened the passenger door of the Jaguar and I slid in as gracefully as I could.

“So where are we going?” I asked.

“All in good time” he replied “It’s a surprise! Now be a darling and put this on please?” he handed me a length of black silky material.

“You have got to be kidding me!” I exclaimed. He turned to face me in the car and gave me the most devastating pair of puppy dog eyes I’d ever been subjected to. I sighed in defeat.

“OK “I acquiesced and put the blindfold on. “Not too long I hope” I said as I tried to get comfortable in my seat.  
We drove for what seemed like ages, Tom occasionally asking if I was ok and placing a comforting hand on my knee. We finally pulled up to a stop and I heard Tom get out. As I made to move Tom quickly said “Leave your blindfold on please darling, for just a few minutes more”  
              He move swiftly to my side of the car, opened the door, held my hand, gave it a reassuring squeeze and helped me out of the vehicle. When I was upright he stood on my right side and placed his left hand around my waist and held onto my right hand with his own to guide me to wherever it was we were heading. Luckily we didn’t have to walk too far, because the ground was quite rough in places. Tom gently steered me along, offering advice on when to pick my feet up especially high or take a longer step than usual. Another gentle squeeze and we stopped walking.  
             Tom removed my blindfold and I gasped, we were in a woodland clearing in the middle of which was a gazebo set up with a table for two. The sunlight coming through the leaves created a beautiful dappled effect, Tom walked me over to one of the chairs and pulled it out for me to sit on, which I graciously did, he went round to sit on the other chair. A waiter appeared out of nowhere and poured us each a glass of wine; he went away and returned with the starters. I looked at Tom and smiled.

“Thank you for this” I said “it’s absolutely beautiful and if I forget to say later I had a lovely time today.”

He smiled back at me “You are more than welcome” he replied.

We finished our starters and the plates were whisked away and the next course delivered. The food was delicious but don’t ask me what we ate, I was too busy losing myself in the depths of Tom’s eyes. Pudding came and went and then we took a stroll in the woods. As we strolled we talked and eventually got to another small clearing. Tom stopped here and turned to me in all seriousness.

“My dear Jackie” he started “these last two Sundays have been absolutely exquisite spending time with you and Lizzie. I really would like to get to know you both better. Would you consent to be my girlfriend?”

There was no hesitation on my part, swept up in the moment I breathed my answer. “Oh yes Tom, I would love to be your girlfriend” I froze suddenly “what about the fangirls and the press though? Can we try and keep it quiet for a while? I need to think of Lizzie really, this is a really important year for her school wise.”

“Yes of course we can try” said Tom “I completely understand your motives.”  
He opened his arms wide and I went forward for the hug, it was strong and gentle at the same time, full of warmth and protection, after a few seconds of complete bliss I pulled back slightly and he took the opportunity to kiss me full on the lips. It wasn’t a passionate kiss but it was just as good. We made our way back to the original clearing and from there back to the car and home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you are enjoying this story. Sorry this chapter is a bit short, it's sweet though I think. I will try and update every Friday as it seems to be working well so far. I would love to know what you think, comments and kudos always welcome.


	6. Chapter 6

Ch. 6

             We quickly fell into a Sunday routine, Tom would come over about 9am and we’d spend the day together, either relaxing in the cottage or going for long walks along the nearby canal or local fields. I’d almost always put a casserole in the oven slow cooking so we could eat in the evening, occasionally we’d all go out for the day somewhere special. I think Tom liked these opportunities to be a ‘normal’ person away from the trappings of fame, even though it was his fame that had brought us together.

              One Saturday Tom got us tickets for the evening performance of his play. We met up in Bath before the performance for an early supper and then made our way to the theatre. Tom disappeared down an alleyway to the stage door and Lizzie and I were escorted to our box by an usher. The play was brilliant and after the curtain call we were escorted backstage to meet the cast and collect Tom, he was staying the night at the cottage. It was a big step for us in our relationship and I was very apprehensive. It had been nine years since I’d had a man in my bed. Was I ready to love again? Tom had assured me that the relationship would progress at my pace and nothing would happen before I was ready. He really was a gentleman in the truest sense of the word. I must say it felt very strange waking up to someone else in the bed saying ‘ Good morning Darling’ and let me tell you that voice is even better first thing in the morning.

          All too soon the idyll had to come to an end. Tom’s play was transferring to the West End and of course he was going with it. The last Sunday we made the point of spending as much time together as possible and as we kissed goodbye he promised to text every day. The first text came as something of a shock though.

**Pack your bags girls, you’re coming to London. A car will pick you up on Friday at 5pm. be ready! p.s. you’ll need something pretty for Saturday night. x x x** **TWH**

I text him back immediately

_Ooh exciting, what are we doing?_

He refused to tell me! Just reiterated that we were to buy something nice for the Saturday night. The rest of the week went by in a blur; Lizzie and I were so excited. We’d managed to get to Bath and buy what we hoped were suitable outfits. Mine was a classic little black dress with a short jacket for my arms and Lizzie’s was a scarlet satin knee length dress teamed with a short black linen jacket and both outfits were packed with the rest of our clothes ready for Friday evening. On the dot of 5pm there was a knock at the door. I opened it to find a chauffeur who said

“Car for Jackie and Lizzie” I smiled at his informality.

“That’s us” I said

“Oh great” he smiled “I thought I’d gotten lost! Can I take your bags?”

He stowed our bags in the boot of a big black car with tinted windows. He opened the doors for us and we clambered into the back seats and settled down for the long journey to London. The passenger space in the car was large with plenty of room to stretch our legs and even a built in entertainment system including a TV/DVD player and a CD player. Not surprisingly the journey to Tom’s apartment seemed to take no time at all.

       Tom lived in a large 5 storey town house, that had been turned into apartments, in a beautiful part of London. We’d passed lots of green spaces on the way and I could see why he’d be happy here. We pulled up outside and the driver got out and opened the doors for us; he retrieved our cases from the boot and led us to the front door of the house. There was an intercom system there and he pressed the top button, Tom’s voice came out of the speaker and even though it was poor sound quality you could tell it was him.

“Yes?”

“Mr Hiddleston, your guests are here” said the driver

“Oh great, I’ll be straight down to help you” said an obviously excited Tom and the buzzer clicked the door open; we walked into the entrance lobby and waited. We didn’t have to wait long, a slightly breathless Tom appeared through a doorway, his eyes were shining and he was wearing a huge smile as he opened his arms and drew us into a big hug. He released us eventually and took a step back to take in the sight of us. As he did so he apologised for his slight breathlessness as he explained that he had run down the service stairs as the lift took too long!

The driver, who we learnt was called Jeff and was Tom’s personal driver, took Lizzie’s case and Tom took mine and with his arm around my shoulders he led us to the lift and up to his apartment. Jeff left us at Tom’s front door and said,

“Goodbye, no doubt I’ll be seeing you again soon”

He smiled at Tom and left.


	7. Chapter 7

Ch.7

Tom opened his front door and invited us in. The apartment was huge there was a very large living space with a big corner seating unit and a large picture window leading onto a small balcony. A large flatscreen television took up half of one wall, the rest being taken up with a bookcase, full of course. Another wall had a smart dining table and chairs set against it. There was a small but adequate galley kitchen in a separate room, a family bathroom was between that and the master bedroom which was big enough for a king size bed and still plenty of room to move around. The second bedroom was a generous double room with a shower and toilet just across from the door. Tom gestured to the second bedroom

“Lizzie, are you ok with this room?” she looked inside and a grin as big as Tom’s spread across her face.

“Yes. Thanks Tom” she said excitedly.

Tom turned to me with a tender look in his eyes “and this is us Darling if you are ok with that? Indicating the Master bedroom, concern suddenly flooding his face.

“It’s fine Love” I said

“Are you sure?” he murmured

“Yes, completely” I said “Lizzie knows that I loved Sean very much and I know that he’d want me to have a chance of happiness if I couldn’t be with him anymore.”

Tom gave me a small sad smile at the mention of Sean’s name but gallantly said. “I hope I will be worthy of the trust you have both placed in me” and he pulled us in for another big hug. “Now, why don’t you both unpack? I’ll get us a drink and make a start on supper”

Lizzie and I unpacked quickly, putting our new outfits where Tom had suggested and returned to the main room. There was a glass of wine waiting for me and Lizzie squeaked a thanks when she saw that Tom had got her a pear cider, which I only let her have on very special occasions. I shot her a warning look to behave herself. She wandered to the TV to peruse Tom’s DVD collection.

“Can I put a DVD on please Tom? She asked.

“Yes sure” he replied

She smiled a thanks and picked out Les Miserables. She held it up for approval and Tom and I exchanged an indulgent look.

“Go ahead” he said and soon we were lost in France with Jean Valjean and Inspector Javert.

Tom cooked a fantastic chicken stir fry packed full of fresh vegetables and beansprouts which he served with egg noodles. We ate off our laps watching the film and when we had finished eating Lizzie took the plates to the kitchen. Tom and I snuggled on the sofa, enjoying the film, the wine and the company. When the film was over Lizzie excused herself to bed, and Tom and I stayed up a while longer catching up properly on our week apart. Eventually I got up and went to do the dishes. As I was running the hot water I didn’t hear Tom creeping up behind me and suddenly a pair of long arms snaked round my waist and his lips nuzzled my neck.

“Wow, that felt good” I murmured

“Ehehehe” Tom chuckled in my ear

“Come on Love” I said with mock severity “let’s not leave the dishes until the morning”

He nodded his agreement and we washed up quickly and then got ready for bed. Tom only wore pyjama bottoms to bed and I’d managed to find a pretty, short nightdress. He lay on his back and I cuddled into his left hand side, using his shoulder as a pillow, he wrapped his arms protectively around me and we were soon asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd just like to say a huge thank you to all of you who are reading this, I get so happy every time I see the number of hits has gone up. I would really love to know what you guys think about this story, comments will be very welcome :) In fact I love you so much this week I'm going to give you a double update. Yes there will be another chapter to follow very soon


	8. Chapter 8

Ch. 8

The next morning I woke to the smell of bacon frying and no Tom in bed. I followed my nose and nearly bumped into Lizzie on the way. I smiled broadly when I saw her, she was wearing her favourite onesie, which just happened to be Loki green and I wondered what Tom would think when he saw that. At that moment he came out of the kitchen and saw us.

“Nice onesie” he said to Lizzie and she blushed. He turned to look at me then. “Darling you look ……” and he struggled to find the correct word

“I know” I said “I look a fright in the morning”

“Well” he smiled at me gently “I didn’t like to say”

I smacked him on the shoulder, not too hard but enough to let him know I was not impressed. He apologised immediately with those wonderful puppy dog eyes and I melted. “Anyway” he said “this is my only super-power. A full English breakfast on the table ready to go – and it’s all still hot!”

“OK now I’m impressed” I said “now quick, let’s eat it before it gets cold”

Breakfast didn’t last long after that and it was delicious. We all pitched in with the cleaning up and it was done in no time at all. Tom then announced that as it was Lizzie and mine first time in London he hoped we didn’t mind but he’d organised a day for us. Lizzie and I exchanged glances, no we didn’t mind at all. With two bathrooms it didn’t take long to get ready and we all met up back in the living room. We all smiled as we’d all chosen to wear jeans. Tom and I wear wearing thin jumpers and Lizzie, who didn’t seem to feel the cold, was wearing her favourite Black Veil Brides Tee-shirt. Tom had already called Jeff so we were all set.

                        Our first stop was the London Eye where Tom had managed to book a capsule just for us! The views over London were spectacular as luckily it was a nice day weather-wise, we were amazed at how much we could see, Buckingham Palace in particular looks brilliant from the air. The circuit took about 45 minutes and when we alighted we went straight to the London Aquarium which was basically next door to the London Eye. We spent quite a while in there admiring the various fish and reptiles. Lizzie loved it, especially the jelly fish and the shark tunnel. Eventually it was time for lunch. Tom took us to his favourite café, a little place down a side street where he could practically guarantee some privacy. The food was plain but delicious.

            “Tom” I said “what exactly are we doing this evening? I mean why did Lizzie and I need new outfits?”

            He looked at me with those wonderful deep eyes and simple said   “It’s a surprise, Darling, don’t worry it’s nothing you won’t enjoy” and that was it, no more was said on the subject leaving me vaguely frustrated.

            Jeff was waiting outside for us and we all got on the back seat, Tom immediately wrapping his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close. I felt so safe in his arms, I sighed in contentment.

            “Darling, are you ok?” he asked

            “Oh yes, thanks” I said “it’s just that I’m really happy right now”

            “Well I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself” he said

            “To be honest” I said “I could be anywhere with you and I’d be happy”

            He looked at me fully then, using his lovely long fingers to tilt my chin up towards him, holding eye contact with me. “Do you really mean that?” he questioned

            “Yes, absolutely” I replied “I never thought I’d feel this way again and I’m so pleased I walked into you in Bath”

            “I’m pleased you did too” he said and gave me a kiss full on the lips, just a quick one though because Lizzie was right next to him! Jeff had been pointing out the sights to here though as we had wound our way through the city and I’m not sure she had noticed our exchange.

                        We ended up at Harrods, of all places, which was amazing, so posh it didn’t use price tags and it was just heavenly. I tried not to let Tom buy us anything really expensive, but I did relent in the jewellery department and let him buy Lizzie and I a small pair of earrings each that just happened to match our outfits for that night. Sadly it was then time to go back to Tom’s apartment to get ready for that evening, we’d all had a really nice time but I was still looking forward to the surprise that night.


	9. Chapter 9

Ch.9

The first surprise was that when Tom announced he was ready, he really didn’t look as smart as I thought he would, he was wearing black dress trousers and a white fitted shirt, no tie or jacket. I mean he still looked good but not remarkable if you get my meaning. He must have seen my perplexed expression because he gave me a look that was pure Loki and said in Loki’s voice “All will be revealed later”

                        Shrugging I went to get ready; Lizzie was already in the shower room so I took the opportunity to have a quick bath. When I was done I went into the master bedroom and carefully got dressed, making sure everything was perfect. I smiled as I put my new earrings in, they were beautiful. I put on a pair of heels and walked into the living room. Lizzie was already there and she looked wonderful in her red dress and black jacket. Tom’s face was a picture as he looked at us both together

            “Wow” he said “just Wow, but Jackie I think there is something missing from your ensemble!”

            I looked at him puzzled “No I don’t think so” I replied “I’m fairly sure I’m fully dressed”

            “Come here please and I’ll sort you out” he said smoothly. I walked over and from behind his back he produced a flat rectangular box.

            “Tom!” I said warningly

            “Yes” he replied with no hint of a apology “Shall we have a look at what’s in here?” he opened the box and there was a beautiful necklace that just happened to match the earrings he’d bought me in Harrods. I looked at him with mock severity.

            “You didn’t spend too much did you?” I asked

            “Nothing is too much for you Darling, here let me help you put it on” he said. I stood with my back to him; he placed the necklace around my neck and did up the clasp, placing a gentle kiss on the nape of my neck as he did so. He turned me round again and took a small step back to admire the effect.

“Yes” he said “now you look perfect” he closed the small distance between us and kissed me full on the lips, not just a quick kiss either but a proper lingering kiss. Lizzie coughed pointedly and we pulled apart both of us blushing slightly. Tom stole a glance at his watch.

            “Ah” he said “time to go” he grabbed his favourite leather jacket off the back of a chair and gestured for us to lead the way.

                        Jeff was downstairs and his eyebrows rose when he saw us. We got into the car and Tom insisted on sitting by the passenger side door instead of in the middle as usual. He was acting a bit oddly but I guessed he had something up his sleeve. We travelled through London in near silence and I was getting slightly apprehensive. I could tell we were getting near the area of London known as Theatreland.

            “Just here please Jeff” Tom suddenly spoke and Jeff stopped the car. I looked worriedly at Tom but he just smiled at me and opened the car door. He got out and spoke to a man standing in a smart suit on the pavement and then Tom leant back into the car with the other guy standing just behind him.

            “Ladies, this is Luke, he’s my publicist and good friend and he will be looking after you for me for a while whilst I do this thing I’ve got to do!”

            I stared at him in amazement “Tom! You’re not serious!” I exclaimed

            “My darling Jackie, I promise you, you will understand soon, but please, for now, just stay with Luke. OK?” he pleaded.

            “Ok” I said “I hope this is worth it, no offence Luke”

            “None taken” said Luke “now off you go Tom, you don’t want to be late” he gave Tom a gentle shove in the back, got into the car with Lizzie and I and shut the door. Jeff drove us to a nearby bar and dropped us off. It was then all the pieces of the puzzle slotted into place and I realise what must be happening, I facepalmed and gave a low groan, Luke looked at me concerned

            “Jackie, what’s wrong?” he asked

            “I think I’ve just worked out what’s going on” I gasped “it’s the opening night of Tom’s play isn’t it?”

            Luke sighed “Yes it is. He thought you wouldn’t work it out! I’m to look after you and Lizzie of course during the play and then …. I’m sworn to secrecy”

            “It’s ok Luke” I said “thank you for doing so”

                        It was then time for us to go to the theatre and Luke seemed intent on making the experience as memorable as possible for us. He stood between us and asked us to put our arms through his as we walked to the theatre, straight through the foyer and to our seats. After I sat down I looked around, all of the women were beautifully dressed in their finery and the men looked stunning in their dress suits and tuxedos. I looked past Luke to Lizzie, her eyes were shining with excitement, she looked at me and we both grinned broadly. The house lights dimmed and we settled down to enjoy the play.


	10. Chapter 10

Ch.10

                        It was, of course, brilliant. Lizzie and I had of course already seen it in Bath so we didn’t have to concentrate so much on the story and I found myself focusing more on the performance, well one actor’s performance in particular. Tom was spellbinding, absolutely inhabiting his character so much so that there was no ‘Tom’ showing at all. It was all utterly mesmerising and I was completely shocked when it was all over, I’d become so engrossed, it was even better than it had been in Bath. Luke nudged me

            “Time to go.” he said and I mentally shook myself, stood up and started to head towards the rear of the theatre. Luke stopped me with a gentle hand on my arm and whispered,

            “Wrong way Jackie.” he led Lizzie and I to a nondescript door by the side of the stage, we slipped through without anyone noticing and Luke led the way through the backstage area to the dressing rooms. When we got to the door with Tom’s name on it Luke didn’t even knock, he just walked straight in! Thankfully Tom was fully clothed in the best fitting tuxedo I’d seen all night. It was my turn to look amazed; Tom looked truly stunning, he carries off a tux so well. He smiled at the affect he was having on me.

            “All set Luke?” he asked

            “Yes Tom.” Luke affirmed

            “All right, let’s show these lovely ladies how we entertain visitors to our wonderful city.” and he held out his arm to me. I took it gratefully and behind me Luke held out his arm for Lizzie. She was a bit hesitant at first but then just decided to enjoy the experience.

We slipped out of the theatre via a back door and managed to avoid seeing anyone until we got to Jeff. He had changed cars and before us sat a large Limo with two bench seats. Lizzie and Luke sat with their backs towards Jeff and Tom and I took the forward facing seat. As Jeff drove Tom outlined the plan for that night without giving anything away which was in itself quite impressive.

            “Luke, you are Lizzie’s escort for tonight, please treat her like she was your little sister and keep her out of trouble. If she gets too tired you may take Jeff and the car back to mine, you have a key, and you can sleep on the sofa if you get tired. There will be no need to send Jeff back for Jackie and I”

            Luke nodded his acceptance of the plans and I smiled at him gratefully, then I turned to Lizzie.

            “You heard Tom” I said “please behave yourself and do as Luke tells you”

            “Yes Mum” she said with a sigh. I looked at her and saw that she would do as she was asked. The limo pulled up to a smooth stop. I glanced at Tom, his eyes were as bright as Lizzie’s had been in the theatre and I realised then how much he loved this.

            “Ready girls?” he asked “stick with us and you’ll be fine, just smile and enjoy it as best you can”

                        We didn’t get a chance to answer as he opened the car door and stepped out. He reached back into the car and help out his hand for me. I’d shuffled over to be nearer to the door, to try and make a dignified exit. I grasped his hand and he helped me out, we stepped back slightly to make room for Luke and Lizzie. They also exited the car gracefully and we walked together down a red carpet towards…….The Ritz! For Tom’s sake I kept my emotions in check but I was excited and incredibly nervous at the same time, I’d already spotted the few photographers in attendance and knew that I didn’t need to make a fool of myself. It looked like Luke was going to be the only one who would stay completely calm all night! Luckily it was only photographers there so we didn’t have to deal with reporters or fan girls. Tom kept us walking and we were soon inside the hotel. A medium sized function room had been hired and we were directed towards the doors

            “Right” said Tom “this is where the couples part, Luke Lizzie you know what’s happening, well you do Luke, Lizzie just enjoy it and don’t forget to tell Luke before you get too tired. Luke just make sure you tell us before you leave OK?”

            “Yes” said Luke “see you whenever. Come on Lizzie, time to party” he linked arms with Lizzie and they wandered off to circulate around the room. Tom looked at me with undisguised excitement

            “Let’s go Jackie” he exclaimed “It’s party time.” We entered the room and it was gorgeous, sumptuous chairs and benches were around the room with small tables scattered near them. There were large tables at one end, laden with plates of delicious looking food. We walked over to a table that was covered in glasses of wine or fruit juice, grabbed one each and continued on our way. Tom kept his arm around my shoulders or waist all night, as we met friends and acquaintances of his. I was glad he had hold of me as some of the guests were really famous. I was introduced to Benedict Cumberbatch and Mark Gattiss, Sherlock and Mycroft Holmes in the same room and not fighting, I had to smile!

                        Tom was quite discreet about ‘us’, if anyone asked I was his girlfriend and if nobody asked, he didn’t mention my relationship with him, just my name. I hoped Luke was being as careful. I was a grown woman and well able (I hoped) to handle anything negative that came my way, but Lizzie was still young and much less worldly wise than myself. I took comfort from the fact that Tom and Luke had obviously discussed the evening before we’d even gotten to London and tried to cover all eventualities. I’d caught glimpses of Lizzie throughout the evening and she seemed content and relaxed and maybe just a little star struck.           At one point soft music started up from somewhere, Tom looked at me and smiled.

            “Care to dance, Jackie?”

            “Tom” I replied “I can’t dance!”

            “Don’t worry darling I can, you just follow my lead” he replied smoothly.

            I suddenly felt very mischievous. “I know Love, I’ve seen you dance” I smirked.

Tom looked totally baffled. “How have you seen me dance? I haven’t...” he stopped suddenly and groaned quietly “Let me guess” he said “the internet right?

            “Yes” I said slightly sheepishly “fan girl remember?”

            “I remember” he replied “but you’re not fangirling now?”

            “Oh no, absolutely not!” I exclaimed “I’m with you because I love you”

            His eyes widened “You do” he said so softly I barely heard him.

            “Yes I do” I reiterated

            “Oh Jackie” he beamed at me “I love you too” and he picked me up bodily and swung me around.

            “Tom!” I squealed “put me down please!” He did but didn’t let go

            “Now we have to dance, you realise that?” he stated. He led me to an empty corner of the room and we danceed, slowly and romantically, eyes never loosing contact with each other. I was slightly weak at the knees so I was glad he was holding me up. As I danced I contemplated what I’d just said. I was in love with Tom, not Tom Hiddleston, world famous actor but ‘my’ Tom who was the sweetest, most generous and kind hearted man I had ever met. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, that thought pulled me up short and I stopped dancing.

            “Jackie are you OK?” Tom asked immediately

            “Yes, of course” I replied “just thinking about stuff, sorry”

            “No need to apologise” he said “I think I understand what you were thinking. Sean has been gone nine years now?”

            I gasped. It was the first time Tom had said Sean’s name “Yes “I said sadly.

            “And in all that time” Tom continued “you have never had another boyfriend in the slightest way?”

            “No” I sighed

            “But here you are with me” and he touched my hand to his heart “feeling things you’d never thought you’d feel again. Yes I understand how you feel.” He smiled sadly at me “Please don’t feel you can’t talk to me about it”

                        I hugged him tighter and rested my head on his shoulder. I felt at peace after his little speech, realising that he sincerely meant every word he said. He kissed to top of my head

            “Come on” he said softly “time to mingle again” We re-joined the main part of the room and, almost immediately, were joined by Luke and Lizzie. Lizzie looked at me searchingly a question forming on her lips.

            “I’m fine” I managed to say before she started talking. “I’ll tell you everything tomorrow.” She nodded acceptance. I looked at her more closely and could see that she was fighting tiredness so I wasn’t surprised when Luke said he’d called Jeff and that they were just leaving.

            “OK darling, sweet dreams” I said and I kissed her on the cheek. “Take care of my little girl Luke” I said in my best ‘mother’ tone and he smiled at me.

            “Yes Ma’am” he replied and gave me a mock salute

            “Cheeky! “ I said “now off you go”

            “See you tomorrow” Tom said to them both. He remembered himself and checked his watch. “Forget I said that” he chuckled “See you later!”

            Lizzie and Luke smiled at him, turned around and left us for Tom’s apartment. Tom looked at me “She’ll be fine with Luke” he said, seeing the concern on my face.

            “I know” I sighed and then smiled resolutely at him. “Anyway, on with the party, right?

            “Right” he smiled and we went to find new people we hadn’t said hello to yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You lucky people get 2 chapters again this week, but don't get too used to it, I'm just feeling generous again. looking forward to seeing you all again next week :)


	11. Chapter 11

 

Ch. 11

                        Eventually it was time to go home. Tom took out his phone and called a cab which arrived very quickly. We got in and sped away, only we didn’t go straight back to Tom’s, he decided we needed to celebrate our relationship a bit more and got the driver to drop us off at a very exclusive little club. He went straight to the bar and ordered a bottle of champagne and two glasses and then we found a quiet table to sit at. We sat for a while, sipping our champagne in the semi darkness just enjoying being together with no pressure.

                        Tom’s not very good at sitting still though and soon I’d been dragged to the dance floor despite my protests. The music was way too fast for my liking but Tom seemed in his element. There was no way I could keep up with him so I made a hasty escape to the edge of the floor and let him get on with it. It was just like watching every video I’d ever seen of him dancing on the internet! I made sure however that he could see me when the music stopped and he came over breathless but happy.  

“I needed that” he exclaimed “media parties are OK but it’s nice to let my hair down every so often”

Just then the next song came on and it was a slow one. Before I knew what was happening I was in the middle of the dance floor with Tom, who was holding me in a firm but gentle hold that said ‘You’re not going anywhere.’ We moved in time to the music and each other, eyes never leaving each other’s faces. We were so wrapped up in each other that we didn’t even realise when the song was over, until the applause started, we both blushed and retreated back to our table.

                        I was feeling a bit tipsy by the time we left the club. I think Tom had made sure I’d had more of the champagne than him and, of course, I hadn’t eaten much all day so the effects as we stepped outside to wait for our taxi were pretty instantaneous. The cold air hit me and I started shivering. Tom noticed immediately and removed his jacket for me to put on. I protested feebly but he insisted. I tried to thank him but my mouth refused to connect with my brain and all that came out was incoherent mumbling. Tom drew me closer to him and held me tight as even standing on my own seemed to take an inordinate amount of effort.

            “Oh dear Darling” he chuckled “you don’t do so well with alcohol then, never mind I’ll know for next time” I frowned at him and he just smiled at me.

            The cab arrived and he helped me in, there was no way I could have done it on my own. He sat me in the middle seat and made sure my seatbelt was fastened before he did his own and said something to the driver. I leaned into him and he put his arm protectively around me. I drifted off to sleep, lulled by the motion of the cab and comforted by Tom’s arms around me.

                        Tom had to wake me up when we got to his apartment; I think it must have taken a bit of time because when I managed to focus my eyes on his face he looked slightly flustered.

“Sorry” I giggled as I practically fell out of the cab into his arms

“it’s OK Darling” he said “I just need to get you to bed *I hope*” that last bit was definitely said more to himself than me. He steered me towards the lift and pressed the call button, helped me inside when it arrived and pressed the button for his floor. When the lift stopped he helped me out and looked me square in the eye. I tried to focus on what he was saying; the look on his face told me it was important.

            “Jackie, darling, Luke and Lizzie are asleep in there and we don’t want to wake them up do we?” he asked. I shook my head trying to be serious but I think the goofy grin on my face may have detracted from the overall effect! Tom shot me an exasperated look and I tried really hard to concentrate. I was completely high on a combination of alcohol and happiness. Tom and I had just affirmed that we loved each other and I felt on top of the world!

            “Darling” Tom said slowly and clearly “I’m going to try and take your shoes off to help you walk better. OK?”

            “Yes” I managed

            “Good” he said and knelt at my feet “now place your hands on my shoulders” he instructed. When I was too slow responding, he gently took my hands and put them on his shoulders himself “hold on tight” he said. He gently grasped one ankle at a time and slipped off my shoes. He was right; it was easier to stand without my heels on. He started to rise gracefully to his full height and my hands slid down his arms to his waist. He grasped my shoes in his left hand and wrapped that same hand firmly around my waist. Then he opened his door and steered me inside. We headed toward the dining table and Tom pulled out a chair for me to sit on. Unfortunately the noise woke Luke and he appeared from behind the sofa.

            “Oh God, I’m sorry Luke” Tom whispered “I was trying to be quiet”           

            “It’s no problem Tom” replied Luke “Jackie a bit worse for wear?”

            “It would seem so” said Tom “it’s not like she’s even had that much to drink. I’m going to get her a glass of water so she shouldn’t be too bad in the morning.” He disappeared into the kitchen and reappeared with the promised glass, which he persuaded me to drink. Then with Luke on one side and Tom on the other we headed to Tom’s room. Luke left us on the threshold of the room and returned to the sofa. Tom took off my necklace and struggled briefly with the zip on my dress. He helped me step out of that and then decided he’d gone far enough and helped me lay down in just my underwear. He tucked me under the covers and I fell asleep almost immediately.

                        The next morning I woke up feeling absolutely fine to an empty bed and I smiled to myself as I heard Tom and Luke moving around quietly so as not to disturb my no doubt delicate head. Boy, were they in for a surprise! I slipped quietly out of bed and removed my old underwear, exchanging it for fresh. I slipped on a clean pair of jeans and a T-shirt and checked my appearance in the mirror. When I was satisfied that I looked as good as possible I threw open the bedroom door and breezed into the main living room. The look on the boys faces was worth a picture! They shot each other incredulous looks and Tom took the few strides towards me looking confused.

            “Good morning boys!” I exclaimed “and isn’t it a beautiful morning?” They were struck dumb, no doubt they thought I would spend the day feeling rotten, lying in bed all day with a massive hangover. Not me though, Tom recovered first, as I hoped he would.

            “Darling, are you OK? Your head’s fine? You’re not feeling sick or anything?” he asked, his face and voice full of concern.

            I’m fine, really I am” I said suppressing a giggle.

            “But how?” he looked completely flummoxed “I mean, no offence but barely five hours ago you couldn’t stand unaided”

            “Ah” I said “You’ve just discovered my superpower. I have a very very low tolerance to alcohol so I get ‘drunk’ very easily but because I haven’t actually drunk a lot of alcohol when it start to take effect, I sober up quite quickly and I don’t get hangovers! I let it happen last night to see how you’d cope. You did brilliantly by the way” and I shot him a fond smile “Basically I’m a cheap date but I can’t get myself home.” I looked Tom square in the eye.

            “You little minx” he said “you knew that would happen, didn’t you?”

            “Yes” I replied

            “When did you know and how do you know?”

            “Well” I looked at him sheepishly “’when?’ was halfway down the first glass of champagne in the club and ‘how?’ well the best way to describe it is that I can feel the tip of my nose go numb. When I get to that point I generally make the decision whether I carry on drinking or not.” Tom burst out laughing and Luke and I had to join in. Luke actually had his head in his hands. “I can see I’m going to have my hands full with you two jokers” he said between chuckles. The noise woke Lizzie who came to see what was going on. I turned to look at her and she read my face in an instant.

            “Mum” she admonished “your Loki is showing!” and that set us all off again.

                        Tom had decided that we were going to the Zoo in Regent’s Park for the day, so after a quick breakfast and freshen up we set off. We’d all dressed down for the day and Tom was also wearing a baseball cap and sunglasses in an attempt not to get noticed too much, he still looked striking though. We dropped Luke back at his place, with many thank for all his efforts the night before, and carried on to the Zoo. It was somewhere I’d always wanted to go and it didn’t disappoint. They had the cutest tiger cub triplets, tapirs, monkeys, great apes and everything in between. We spent ages just wandering round trying to see everything but not rushing too much.

                        All too soon it was time to go back to Tom’s and pack. Jeff drove us back and once in the apartment Lizzie and I sadly started to fill our suitcases. When we were ready to go Tom announced one last surprise, we were booked into a small pub on the way home for an evening meal and Tom was coming with us!

            “Are you sure?” I said, concerned “it will be a late night for you”

            “I’ll be fine” he said “I can nap in the car on the way back. I’ve done it lots of times, anyway it’s all booked now.” He gave me a burst of his puppy dog eyes and all my objections melted. The journey and the meal were great fun but conversation gradually died down as we got closer to the cottage. Suddenly Tom grasped my hand and turned to look at me in all seriousness. “You will come up again next weekend won’t you? I can’t promise a lavish party again but I’ll cook lunch on Sunday. Deal?”

            “Deal” I smiled “I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A huge thank you to everyone reading this, 99 hits this week alone. I feel so humble that so many are reading this fic of mine and enjoying it, well at least I hope you're enjoying it! Anyway on with the story

Ch.12

                        Tom and I had been seeing each other for about four months, we were still very happy and spent every minute we could together and when we couldn’t be together there was always calls texts and, best of all, Skype. I’d met all of his family and he’d met my few real friends. Everyone agreed we seemed made for each other. Tom’s play had done really well in London so we hadn’t even had to face the possibility of him going away filming, though no doubt it would come up eventually.

It turned out to be sooner than I expected.

One weekend Tom was practically bursting with excitement from the minute we walked in his London door on the Friday night, he had a performance to attend so we didn’t see him for long that evening but it didn’t seem to matter much. The next morning he was just as excited, he couldn’t stop smiling but he refused to tell us what was making him so happy, and yet at odd moments of the day I caught him looking at me with what could be called an apprehensive expression on his face, though as soon as he realised I’d noticed ‘smiling Tom’ was back. It was most infuriating!

            That evening he told us to dress up to the nines as he was taking us out for a special meal. We ended up in a high class restaurant where Tom had booked a private room. As soon as we were settled he started talking.

“Firstly, anything I tell you tonight is in strictest confidence, no telling anyone OK?” he said “I have news, good and bad.”

I looked at him worriedly “What’s the good news? I asked

His face lit up as he said “I’ve been cast as Hank Williams in an upcoming film about his life and death”

“That’s brilliant Tom” Lizzie and I said in unison, big smiles on our faces too.

“You haven’t heard the bad news yet” he said.

“Well it can’t be that bad” I said with confidence “What is it Love? Tell us”

Tom took a deep breath “It’s a brilliant opportunity, and I really want to do it but it means a bit of time out of the country”

“Oh” I said “how long exactly?”

“I’m not sure” he said “filming starts in late October, but I’d have to go to Louisiana quite a bit earlier than that to prepare, maybe as early as end of August beginning of September. I’ll be home for Christmas though, definitely. I’m not going to miss our first Christmas together as a ‘nearly ‘family!”

My face fell “But you will miss my birthday” I said sadly

“I know Darling, I’m so sorry, but there’s not a lot I can do about that. I really, really want to do this film, they’ve put a lot of trust in me and I won’t let them down”

I gave myself a very short, very stern talking to. “I’m sorry too Tom, I’m being selfish, of course you must go to Louisiana, it’s too good an opportunity to miss and I won’t let you potentially damage your career just because your new girlfriend happens to have a birthday whilst you are away. I’ve been on my own for a couple of birthdays now” I continued “well except for Lizzie of course” and I smiled gratefully at her. “One more won’t make a lot of difference, the best bit is of course that this time I know that you will be thinking of me and wishing you could be with me, and that will be good enough for me”

Tom considered my words for some time. He looked at me searching my face for any clue as to what I really meant, as if I could hide my true thoughts from him! I kept my face neutral. He sat very still for a few more minutes, his face tense and serious. I sat quietly; I really didn’t want him to throw this brilliant chance away, a chance to prove he could play so much more than a cartoon villain. Suddenly his head lifted and his mood lightened dramatically. He gazed at me as if he was seeing me for the first time. “Wisdom and beauty” he said gently, getting up from his seat and moving to hold my head between his large warm hands “so unusual to find them in the same packaging” it was like he was talking to himself. He brought my lips slowly to his own and kissed me. A kiss of true love, gentle but firm, passionate but restrained. I forgot how to breathe! Luckily Tom broke the kiss at that moment and I gulped in air, blushing madly. Tom regained his seat and the meal continued as expected, we all regained our good humour and laughed and joked with each other as normal. September seemed ages away and if that was all we had to deal with this year, life would be good.

Unfortunately it was not to be.


	13. Chapter 13

Ch.13

I was called into the office at work one Friday afternoon and given some shocking news. I was going to be made redundant! The factory had been losing money for some time and they had to make savings. Because I only worked 8am to 4pm and couldn’t do shifts because of Lizzie it had been decided that I was surplus to requirements. I was given a letter detailing the financial package I would receive and my finish date which was only three weeks away and then it was time to go home! How I got there I shall never know because I’m sure I was not paying attention to the driving. Lizzie was luckily was round a friends so I didn’t have to say anything to her just yet. Instead I text Tom.

_Need to talk  :-(_ _; can you please call when you’ve got 5 mins? J x x_

I’d only just put the phone down by my side when it rang, it was Tom of course “Darling, what’s wrong?” he asked and I could hear the anxiety in his voice “What’s happened?” I just started crying down the phone at him. The wonderful man that he is, he just let me, making the odd soothing noise as I sobbed down the phone. I eventually calmed down enough to tell him what had happened. As I recounted the day’s events I could hear drawers and cupboards opening and closing and the unmistakable sound of a bunch of keys being grabbed.

“Tom? Are you going out?” I asked.

“Why yes Darling, I’m just about to leave and come and comfort you.” He replied

“Well that’s very sweet of you, but aren’t you forgetting something?” I responded

“No” he said “I don’t think so, overnight bag, keys, jacket, and phone. No I’ve got it all, be with you as soon as I can.”

“And the play?” I countered “You’re meant to be on stage in two hours and you shouldn’t really let your public down.”

“No, you’re right” he sighed heavily “and I so wanted to give you a hug and tell you everything will be OK.” He thought for a minute. “Got it!” he exclaimed “I’ll drive down straight after the final curtain, stay the night and bring you back with me for the rest of the weekend. Do you think you can organise a weekend sleepover for Lizzie?”         

“I’m sure she won’t mind” I said “I’ll try not to go to sleep before you get here tonight but I’ll leave a key under the flowerpot by the front door in case I do so you can still get in.”

“Agreed” he said “stiff upper lip Darling, I’ll see you later.” and he rang off. Lizzie came home at that point and immediately knew something was wrong, she was really worried when I told her my news but understood the need for Tom and I to have a long talk about the implications. She went off to find someone to stay with for the weekend. As I predicted I was asleep on the sofa when Tom arrived just after midnight. I woke up to the feel of his lips on mine and the gentle caress of his hands in my hair.

“Hello Darling, did you know how lovely you look when you’re asleep?”

“No.” I replied sleepily.

“Well you do” he smiled “I’m here now, shall we go to bed and we can talk when we wake up?”

“OK” I said and we went upstairs.


	14. Chapter 14

Ch. 14

TOM’s POV

I woke up in the morning and gazed at Jackie in pure contentment. My thoughts had coalesced on the drive down to Wiltshire and I knew what I had to do. Luckily for me Lizzie was already up and about; I could hear her moving downstairs. I pulled on a pair of trousers and a T-shirt and crept out of the bedroom. I found Lizzie in the kitchen and she kindly made me a cup of my favourite Earl Grey tea.

“Lizzie, can I have a word?” I said tentatively

“Sure Tom.” she replied

“Thanks.” I said “Um. Can we go outside? I don’t want your Mum to hear this yet.” She looked at me suspiciously but led the way to the back door. We stopped just outside the back door and she turned to face me. I took a deep breath and started to say the words that had come to me on my drive the night before. “Lizzie” I started “I want to ask your permission to marry your mum.” Her eyes widened and her mouth opened but I carried on, I couldn’t stop now! “Obviously I would normally ask your granddad but as he is no longer with us I have decided to ask you instead. I know I can make her happy. I want you to understand that I’m not trying to replace your dad but I do want to be a part of both your lives. So, would that be OK?

Lizzie looked at me assessing “Are you kidding me?” she said “Of course it would be OK, and I’m confident she’d say yes. You don’t see how her face lights up every time she gets a text from you. To see her like that makes me so happy!” she hugged me tightly, expelling the breath I didn’t realise I’d been holding.

“Phew!” I sighed “That’s a relief”

Lizzie giggled

“You can’t tell her anything though” I said sternly “but I do need your help in this, can we swap mobile numbers and will you keep an eye on her for me please and let me know if you see anything you are worried about?

“Of course Tom” Lizzie replied and we swapped numbers

“We need a code word so that I know it’s you with a problem” I thought for a moment “How about Sigyn?” I thought Lizzie was going to burst! “Oh you know your Norse mythology then” I smiled

“Yes Tom, I can do that” Lizzie said. At that moment Jackie found us and we clammed up completely.

JACKIE’s POV

“Yes Tom, I can do that” I heard Lizzie say. Tom and Lizzie were standing just outside the back door of the cottage and they both looked surprised to see me.

“Um” Tom said “I was just asking Lizzie to keep an eye on you for me for the next few weeks in case you didn’t want to tell me something that was bothering you” a glance passed between them but I couldn’t read it.

“Oh right” I said suspiciously “Well you’d better come back inside for some breakfast before we set off” and they followed me back in. We had breakfast, cleared up and then Tom and I left for London. Lizzie's friend was picking her up later, but we had to leave early so Tom wouldn’t be late for his matinee performance of his play. On the way Tom explained that whilst he was at the theatre that afternoon the ever dependable Luke would take me to see Tom’s own accountant to work out what was my best course of action with regard to my redundancy money and the rest of my inheritance from Mum and Dad to provide me with a small income. I was surprised but thanked him for his thoughtfulness, to which he just shrugged “it’s nothing” he murmured.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N so two short chapters this week because I didn't want to leave you guys hanging but also didn't want to make this one chapter. Thanks again for reading and I'll see you next week :-)


	15. Chapter 15

Ch.15

            We got to London we enough time to spare that we could dump our bags at Tom’s and call Jeff to pick us up. When we got to the theatre Luke was waiting for us, Tom went in to the theatre and Luke got into the car and we continued to Tom’s accountants. They spent quite some time going through the various options open to me and I left with loads of paperwork to go through. Luke and I even had time for coffee and cake before Tom was due out of the theatre. When it was time we headed round to the Stage Door.

“Luke” I said “can we not go in but wait out here for Tom? I’d like to see him with his fans”

Luke shrugged but said “OK” and we found a spot in the shadows where we could see but not be seen. Soon a gaggle of young girls appeared by the Stage Door and then Tom emerged. I watched fascinated as he interacted with his fans. They all got individual attention, some wanted photos (Tom is incredibly good at selfies!), some wanted autographs and some just wanted to speak to him. He treated them all with great respect, and that smile of his and they must have all gone away feeling like princesses. I knew how they felt!

            As soon as Tom was alone he started looking around, obviously Luke had text him to let him know we would be outside. As soon as his back was turned I ran silently up behind him and tapped him on the shoulder. As he turned I put my arms around his neck and gave him a long, passionate kiss, keeping my eyes open to watch his face. The first split second all that registered was shock, but then he recognised me and kissed me back. We broke the kiss and I started giggling.

“I wish you could have seen you face” I giggled “it was so funny!”

“I thought you were an over enthusiastic fan girl!” he explained

“I am” I countered and we laughed again

“How did you and Luke get on?” Tom asked

“Fine thanks, lots to think about but it looks like I’ll be OK for a while at least. I want to talk to you about it later though as you have more experience of dealing with large sums of money than me” I said

He rolled his eyes “Darling, that’s why I employ accountants!” He told hold of my hand and we walked back toward Luke, who frowned when he saw our linked hands.

“You will have to be careful Tom” he said “or you will have to go public whether you want to or not”

Tom looked at Luke with an unreadable expression on his face “Jackie and I will go public when we deem necessary” he sounded cross for the first since I’d met him and I had the feeling that this was more about protecting me more than him. Luke held up his hand in surrender.

“OK, Tom, OK! I was just saying! I’m so sorry if I caused you any upset Jackie” he said looking directly at me

“It’s OK Luke but Tom’s right” I said “it’s our decision, not yours” and I realised I sounded as cross as Tom had.

“Got it” Luke said “Sorry again”

“Accepted” Tom and I said in unison, we looked at each other and smiled. “Anyway” Tom continued “we need to get something to eat before the evening performance. You coming Luke?”

“Yes please” said Luke but he still looked a bit wary. We found a quiet restaurant and had a light meal, as Tom didn’t want too much before performing again that night.

            Luke left us after the meal and we made our way back to the theatre. I went in with Tom this time and he arranged for me to have a seat in the auditorium to watch the play. It was still brilliant. After the play we got a taxi back to Tom’s and had a light supper. We’d had a long day and went to bed after we’d cleaned up. We actually managed a lazy day on the Sunday; we got up when we felt like it and breakfasted on cereals and juice. We spent a lot of time discussing my financial future but to be honest seemed no further forward after the chat than before. Tom decided to drive me home himself in the evening, stay the night and head back to London when Lizzie and I left on the Monday morning. My last three weeks at work went by really quickly and before I knew it, it was my last day.


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I must really love you guys, two chapters again this week but don't get too used to it. Tobetheone you may need your tissues for this one. Thanks you again for all the kudos and hits. You all make me feel very special every week

Ch.16

Tom’s POV

It was Jackie’s last day and I was so nervous. She didn’t know that I was a lot closer to her than she thought. I’d managed to get the Friday and Saturday off from the play and I’d stayed in a hotel in Bath on the Thursday night, travelling down after the final curtain. I’d done a lot of preparation in the previous three weeks and today was the day it would all come to fruition. I’d contacted Jackie’s work and they had been very helpful, everything was in place one of the most important roles I would ever play. I checked my watch for the hundredth time that day and finally it was time to go. I got dressed in the tuxedo I’d worn the first time we’d gone out together in London, got in my car and drove to her work. I met Lizzie, Luke and Jeff in the factory carpark along with a large horse box with a beautiful white horse tethered to it.

            The factory had been very accommodating and had even shut down the packaging lines for me to be able to spring my big surprise on Jackie. It was about 1:30 in the afternoon and I was hoping to catch the entire incoming shift as well as those in the factory. Jackie colleagues in the Lab were the only ones who were to stay at their work place so as to not arouse her suspicions. Finally it was time for me to set off. I patted my packet just to make sure the small square box was still there and I mounted the horse. I led the entire workforce down the yard towards the Technical Block where I hoped Jackie was still oblivious as to what was happening. The sun chose that moment to come out from behind the clouds and light up the whole place, now it was perfect.

As I got right up to the Technical Block I thought I could see Jackie’s face in the window. I swallowed hard and glanced back at Lizzie and Luke who were just behind me, they both gave me a big grin and a thumbs up. I turned resolutely to the front and I realised I was really close now. I took a deep breath and calling on all my theatrical training announced

“I am looking for the Lady Jacqueline!”

A door opened in the Technical Block and Jackie appeared at the top of a little set of steps in front of the door, giving me a look that would quell lesser men. I made a mental note never to use her full name again (well maybe just once more) I dismounted, handed the reins to a grinning Luke and walked up the steps to Jackie. When I got to the top I got down on one knee and Jackie gasped audibly eliciting chuckles from her lab colleagues ranged behind her. I took the small box out of my pocket and opened it. Inside was a sapphire set round with diamonds in a gold ring. I looked up at my beautiful lady and said aloud the words I’d rehearsed so often

“My darling Jackie, you captivated my heart the day you bumped into me in Bath and my love for you has grown day by day since then. I know life has been hard for you these past few years but, believe me, I can make things better for you now. I can’t ask your father for your hand in marriage but I have done the next best thing and asked Lizzie instead and she has given me her blessing. So my gorgeous Lady will you do me the honour of becoming my wife?”

I looked deep into her eyes and was surprised to see tears streaming down her face, though she was making no sound and the smile on her face outshone the sun.

“Yes” she said and I sighed with relief. I slipped the ring on her finger and stood up to give her a massive hug and lingering kiss whilst her colleagues gave us a round of applause.

“By the way” I whispered in her ear “you’ve just finished work early, don’t worry it’s all arranged” she shrugged off her lab coat and I led her down the steps and back to the horse. Lizzie came up and hugged us both and Luke hugged Jackie and gave me a pat on the back in congratulations. I helped Jackie onto the horse, got myself up behind her and rode back up the yard.

           

Jackie’s POV

My last day at work had seemed as normal as usual, right up to the point when I glanced out of the window in the door onto the yard and saw a very strange sight. Tom, it could only be Tom, was riding down the yard on a white horse with what looked like the entire workforce behind him. As he got nearer I saw him glance behind him and I saw Lizzie was there too! I was dimly aware of my work friends standing behind me. And then I heard him call my name, my full name! At that point I went outside onto the top of the steps. I watched in shock as he got down on one knee and produced a small box from his suit pocket and opened it. I definitely gasped when I saw the ring. I listened in amazement to the beautiful words he spoke and when he had finished I was smiling broadly with tears streaming down my face. When Tom had finished speaking there was only one thing I could say.

“Yes”

Tom stood up, hugged and kissed me as everyone applauded and cheered loudly. Tom helped me onto the horse and we rode together up the yard. As we rode Tom said

“We may have just gone public, hope you don’t mind”

“Not at all” I replied

When we got to the car park Tom swung easily down from the horse and then turned to help me down as well. As soon as my feet touched the floor Tom pulled me into another lingering kiss.

“Thank you” he said simply

I was, for once, lost for words. He took my hand and held it tight as Lizzie and Luke came into view. Lizzie, bless her, had gone into the Lab and grabbed all my personal possessions for me. As she got near enough she said to me wonderingly

“You didn’t tell anyone did you Mum? Half the factory workers are standing around not quite believing that you’ve got engaged to Tom Hiddleston”

“No I didn’t” I said quietly

“Why not?” asked Tom

“Because, I didn’t think they’d believe me, because we wanted to keep it quiet but most of all because I didn’t want to look a fool if it all went wrong!” I explained.

Tom pulled me into another massive hug “You silly goose” he murmured in my ear but when he pulled away I could see he was really proud of me.

“You looked wonderful coming down the yard” I said with a smile

“Did I?” replied Tom “that’s good, I was as nervous as I’d ever been. I mean you might have said ‘No’ and then I would have looked the fool”

I looked at him aghast “Did you really think I might say ‘No’?” I whispered.

“Well it was always a possibility” he allowed “but I was quietly confident especially after I had talked to Lizzie”

I turned to look at Lizzie who slid an innocent expression on her face “You knew!” I said accusingly.

“Yes” she said simply with no trace of apology.

“Ladies” Tom interrupted “this is a conversation for another time; we have places to go and people to see.”

“We do?” I started to say but Tom carried on talking “Luke, you and Lizzie take the Jag back to the cottage. Jackie and I will ride with Jeff and we’ll see you soon. OK?”

“OK” they said in unison and headed towards Tom’s Jag which was parked nearby.

Tom turned to the owner of the horse “Thank you very much” he said “he is a truly magnificent animal” and he handed over an envelope. We turned then and got onto the car whose door Jeff was holding open with a huge smile on his face.

“Told you I’d be seeing you again, and will be a lot more now I’m sure. Congratulations to you both”

“Thank you” I said as I slid into the car. I took the middle seat so that I could cuddle with Tom. He got in beside me, fastened his seatbelt and put his free arm round my shoulders. “At last, my love, alone for a while” he murmured in my ear, brushing his lips on my neck. “These next 48 hours or so are going to be hectic but they will be worth it”

“Hectic?” I queried

“You’ll see” he replied cryptically “by the way, don’t be too harsh on Lizzie too soon; you’ll understand more in a few hours. Talking of which” he said and he took out his phone and dialled a number. I could only hear his side if the conversation of course

“Hi Mum, It’s Tom”

“I’m fine thanks, better than fine actually, Jackie said ‘Yes’” he turned to look at me fondly.

“Yes, all set for tomorrow?”

“Good, will Dad be there? I’m just about to ring him when I get off the phone to you.”

“Right OK, see you tomorrow then. Bye”

Three more calls followed, one to his dad obviously and I guessed one to each of his sisters. I just sat and watched him get even happier, if that was possible. Eventually he put his phone back in his pocket and turned to look at me again “All set for tomorrow.” he said happily

“What’s happening tomorrow? I asked

“All in good time” he replied

I sighed in exasperation. I just wanted someone to tell me what was going on! I realised I was being selfish and shook myself mentally. I ought to be focussing on the very real fact that I was wearing Tom’s ring on my finger and he was right next to me.

We got back to the cottage and to my relief Lizzie had the kettle on, a cup of coffee was just what I needed. Tom went immediately upstairs to take off his suit and came back downstairs in jeans and a Tee- shirt. He flopped down on the sofa and beckoned me closer. I sat next to him for a cuddle. I felt like he would never let me go again and I sighed in complete contentment.

“Penny for your thoughts my love” Tom said quietly

“Nothing much” I said “just thinking about today really, a day I’ll never forget”

“Well we’ve got a couple of hours to relax and then it will be time to get ready for the next event” he said still not telling me what was going to happen!

It was really nice to sit and relax with nothing to do; making small talk, but all too soon it was time to go again. I went upstairs to get out my work clothes.

“No need to dress too special” Tom called up after me “You’ll find out why when we get where we are going”


	17. Chapter 17

Ch.17

We left the cottage in the same grouping we had arrived in, Luke and Lizzie in Tom’s Jag again and Tom and I with Jeff. To my surprise we were heading back to Frome, where the factory was. I looked over at Tom questioningly but he just smiled at me and said nothing it really was quite infuriating! We arrived at a hotel in the centre of Frome and went into Reception where we were clearly expected. The manager himself greeted us and told Tom that all arrangements were in place.

“Thank you” said Tom “just one thing, have Mr and Mrs Hunt checked in yet?”

“Mr Hunt is here” said the manager “but I’m afraid that Mrs Hunt has been unavoidable detained”

“Oh I see” said Tom, a little crestfallen. He seemed to gather his thoughts, turned to me and said “Come on Darling, there is someone I want you to meet”

The manager led the way upstairs and left us outside the door to Suite 1 which was our suite. Lizzie and Luke had a single room each just down the corridor and it seemed we had the whole floor to ourselves. We entered the room and I got yet another surprise that day, my clothes for the evening were laid out neatly on the bed.

           “How?” I asked and then the penny dropped. “Lizzie” I said looking straight at Tom.

            “Yes” he said, looking at me softly “I hope you don’t mind too much?”

            “I’m getting used to it!” I sighed

            “Anyway” Tom said suddenly “we need to go visiting” and he grabbed my hand and took me next door. Tom knocked on the door and a very familiar voice said,

            “Yes? Who is it?”

            Tom immediately slipped into his Loki voice “Brother, open the door!”

            The door was flung open and there stood Chris Hemsworth! Of course, his alias, Mt Hunt, as in James Hunt the former Formula 1 driver he portrayed in the film Rush. The two men stepped forward into a big hug that spoke volumes about their friendship and respect for each other. They broke after a few seconds and Tom looked at Chris, his face full of concern “Chris, where’s Elsa?”

            “Ah mate” said Chris in his unmistakable Australian drawl “one of the twins is a bit under the weather so she decided to stay home with the kids. She sends her apologies and told me to tell you she’ll definitely be there for the wedding!”

            Tom’s face cleared and he pulled me close to him again. “Jackie” he said, suddenly formal I’d like to introduce you to ‘my brother from another mother’ this is...”

            “Chris Hemsworth” I breathed

            Tom and Chris chuckled and Chris stepped forward and gave me a kiss on the cheek. “So you’re the girl Tom has been on about constantly for the last few months” Chris said.

            “I guess so” I said “either that or he’s been two timing me already!”

            We all laughed at that and Tom pretended to look hurt but his eyes, as always, told me the truth behind the look “No danger of that, my love” he whispered in my ear.

            “Good” I said, reaching up on tip toe to kiss him.

            “Right, well we’d better get changed” Tom said briskly changing the subject. He looked at his watch “See you in the bar in about an hour?” he said to Chris.

            “Sure, no worries” said Chris and we went back to our room

            When we were safely inside I turned to Tom “Lizzie does know Chris is here, right? I mean Thor and Loki in the same room may be a bit much for her, you saw how she was the first time she met you!”

            Understanding dawned on Tom’s face “Oh” he said “Right, I didn’t think of that. Shall we…. Um!”

            “We’d better” I cut in “unless you want to catch her again!”

            Tom quickly phoned Chris “Chris, there is something I overlooked, could you please come and meet Jackie’s daughter Lizzie before the…” he stopped talking and shot me a glance, whilst he listened to Chris “You can? Good, trust me its better this way” as he ended the call there was a knock on the door. Tom opened it and there stood Chris.

            “Is there a problem brother?” he said as Thor

            “Yes brother” Tom said as Loki. I groaned at the pair of them and thankfully they stopped. “The first time Lizzie met me” Tom continued in his normal voice “she fainted from shock and we’d really like to avoid that happening again this evening. She’s a huge Marvel fan and may just be overwhelmed when she sees us together, better to do it in private we think.”

            Chris looked at me and I nodded my agreement “OK” he said with a huge smile on his face “let’s go say hello”

            We headed towards Lizzie’s room and I knocked on the door “Lizzie, love are you decent, you have a guest.” The door opened a crack and my gorgeous daughter stuck her head out. Chris was being a terrible tease and keeping out of view. “Can we come in?” I asked

            “Sure” she said and opened the door wide. I walked in followed by Tom and finally Chris. As I predicted she let out a squeak and Tom shot Chris a look that clearly said < I told you so> “Breathe Lizzie” I said sternly and she took a big breath. Chris stepped forward to introduce himself.

            “Hi Lizzie, I’m Chris” he said

            “I know” she said with a massive smile on her face, but at least she was still on her feet. All of a sudden, as if on cue, we all got our phones out and took loads of selfies. We all ended up giggling and it felt like we’d all known each other for years.

            “I’m glad that went well” I said as we left Lizzie’s room to get ready for whatever the evening held for me.

            “Thanks Chris” said Tom

            “No worries” came the reply “see you in the bar” and Chris returned to his room.


	18. Chapter 18

Ch. 18

                        Back in our room we started to get ready. I’d already guessed that Lizzie must have packed my bag and I made a mental note to give her a proper thank you when I got the chance. When we got down to the bar Chris was already there and we went to sit with him. Tom opened an account behind the bar and ordered drinks for us. He handed me my apple juice with a smile “No alcohol for you tonight Darling, I want you to remember this night forever” and he gave me a kiss on the lips. I pouted a bit but I knew he was right. I really didn’t want to ruin the evening for anyone. Tom handed his drink to Chris and help out his hand for me to help me up from my chair. I stood up leaving my drink on the table.

      Tom was behind me straight away, his big hands covering my eyes completely. Before I could protest he was speaking gently into my ear “One last big surprise Darling” and he steered me in front of him. Chris must have been leading the way because we didn’t stop for any doors. Suddenly I felt I was in a big space but it didn’t feel empty and there was an enthusiastic round of applause.

                        Tom removed his hands and as I blinked I realised that the room was full of people. I spotted my colleagues from work, my best friend Louise and her family and some friends I hadn’t seen for a while. I turned round to look at Tom, he was grinning like a loon and his eyes were twinkling like stars.

            “Is all this for me?” I gasped

            “Well Darling, it’s a bit for both of us as it’s our engagement party after all” he said pointedly and then his voice softened slightly “but yes it’s mainly for you because I love you and you deserve it” He stepped away from me then, leaving me in the centre of the room on my own. I sent him a searching look but he just answered me with a smile as he stepped onto the makeshift stage.

            “Ladies and Gentlemen” he began “for those of you who haven’t met me yet my name is Tom and as you all know this is a very special day for my darling Jackie and I, more so for Jackie as some of you may not know she had her last day at work today and I stole her colleagues thunder somewhat by stealing her away before they had a chance to say a proper goodbye, so I’m giving the floor over to them.”

                        The whole lab contingent of the party stood and joined me on the dance floor. There was a huge bouquet of flowers, a large box of my favourite chocolates and rather surprisingly a bottle of champagne with a pair of matching flutes. I glanced over at Tom whose face was a picture. I grinned at him and he grinned back. My boss said a few words about how I was a good worker and how much they’d miss me, especially my warped sense of humour and finished up by wishing Tom and I every happiness in our new life together. I thanked them profusely and they returned to their seats.

                        Tom and Chris then both came out on the dance floor, Chris to take my presents safely to the side and Tom to continue where he left off. There was a bit of shuffling behind me on the stage but I was so focused on Tom beside me that I didn’t turn around to see what was going on.

            “So Ladies and Gentlemen” Tom continued “you know that today Jackie made me the happiest man alive by agreeing to marry me and I vow, here in front of you all that I will always do my best to be worthy of that honour.” He turned and took my hands in his, his face full of love and sincerity. “My dearest Jackie, I will always cherish you and be true only to you. Thank you so much for saying ‘Yes’” He leaned in and kissed me full on the lips. It was so emotional I nearly started to cry, but managed to bite back my tears.

        That was until Chris appeared beside us and said “Ladies and Gentlemen, my name is Chris and I’m Tom’s best friend. Please join me in wishing Tom and Jackie good luck in the future by raising your glasses.” The whole room toasted us and then Chris said “Now for some special music from a special group. I give you Thorne in the Roses.”

                        I gasped, that was Lizzie’s band! Tom held me tight as the music began and the girls played their version of the Bangles hit Eternal Flame. I realised what they had done almost immediately. Those clever girls had rearranged the song so that it worked as a waltz but without spoiling it. The tears did start falling then, trickling down my face nonstop as I twirled around the floor with Tom. He noticed, of course, and wiped them away gently with the pads of his thumbs.

            “You OK?” he said softly

            “I’m fine” I said “it’s all so perfect. Thank you so much”

            “Oh Darling” he said gently “I’m so glad you’re happy”

                        The song finished then and Tom and I went to congratulate Lizzie and the band. “Oh Lizzie” I said through my tears “That was beautiful, so perfect. Thank you for everything you have done to help Tom organise this”

            “Mum” she said and I saw her eyes were full of tears too “Tom makes you happy, and that makes me happy. It helps that he’s gorgeous though!” Tom blushed slightly but hugged her again “Thank you” he said and gave her a chaste kiss on the cheek.

            “Now go away” Lizzie ordered “we have more songs to sing!”

            We stepped off the stage obediently and I turned to look at my daughter. She looked so at home up there, so confident, so in control. I was so proud of her. Lizzie and her friends played four more songs and then left the stage to enjoy the rest of the party. Tom had hired a brilliant DJ and he kept the music going long into the night. Everybody had a great time. I dance with Tom and Chris and so did Lizzie when she thought I wasn’t looking!


	19. Chapter 19

Ch. 19

                        Too soon it seemed there were only five people left and that was our little group. I sighed “that was a wonderful evening. I wish it could have gone on forever”

            “All good things must come to an end” said Tom with mock pomposity

            I huffed at him “Silly!”

            “Yes” he replied simply. Lizzie, Luke and Chris just rolled their eyes at the pair of us. We went to our respective rooms after saying goodnight.

            “Definitely a day to remember” said Tom as I snuggled in close

            “Mmm” I agreed “Thank you so much”

            “I love you” he said

            “And I love you too” I murmured as we drifted off to sleep.

                        The next morning we were up quite early even though we had a long day ahead of us. We met Lizzie, Luke and Chris for breakfast in the hotel. It was a fun affair as stories were retold of instances that had happened at the party, and of course Chris had to have the story of the proposal recounted to him.

                        Tom had a flash of inspiration at one point. He only had one more week of the play left and then he was free until he had to leave for the preparation for I saw the Light. He suggested that as it was the Summer Holidays and so no school, why not have a couple of weeks in London, we could see all of the sights in the first week and the second week we’d have all the time we needed to ourselves. A stern look was sent Luke’s way as if to say <You’d better not book anything for me that week> and Luke looked a bit worried.

                        In the end it was decided that we would go back to the cottage so Lizzie and I could pack for our now extended stay and then we would leave for Tom’s. Luke would take the Jag again, park it at Tom’s, wait for us there, and Jeff would take him home after he’d dropped us off. Poor Jeff was doing a lot of running around I thought.

                        The conversation soon changed to the plans for the next two days. It transpired that we were off to London for an engagement party for Tom’s family and friends and then on Sunday it was to be a Hiddleston family lunch. Tom was right when he said the weekend would be hectic. I was suddenly very glad I didn’t have to work on the Monday morning and that it was the Summer Holidays. Chris left straight after breakfast with the promise that he’d see us that evening as he didn’t want to miss another party! Tom and I went and thanked the hotel staff for their wonderful hospitality and then headed for the cottage. Lizzie and I packed quickly and I made sure the cottage was secured before getting in the big car once more and then we were off to London. Lizzie fell asleep on the way and ended up resting her head on Tom’s shoulder as he always sat in the middle if we were all in the car. She looked so relaxed that we didn’t have the heart to wake her and as that night would be a late one, the sleep would do her good.

                        Tom woke Lizzie gently as we got closer to his apartment and she looked slightly embarrassed as she realised just where she had rested her head. Tom just shrugged it off as if it was the most natural thing in the world. We went up to his apartment and for the first time I realised that one day this may be ‘our’ home. That thought sent a warm glow through me as I was filled with happiness. I really could be happy again with Tom I thought, and I knew Lizzie would be more than happy to have him as a stepdad. I went back into the living room, still with a slight smile on my face. Tom looked up as I approached and smiled when he saw I was smiling too.

            “Everything OK Darling?” he asked as I sat next to him.

            “Perfect, thank you” I replied. From the sounds coming from Lizzie’s room she was practicing her guitar so we had some time together just enjoying being next to each other with no one else around.


	20. Chapter 20

Ch. 20

After what seemed like a short while I glanced at my watch “Oh my goodness, have you seen the time? We’ve been talking for ages and it must be nearly time to get ready for tonight”

            Tom glanced at his watch too and jumped up “We’ve got just over 90 minutes” he said “good job we’ve got two bathrooms!”

            I went to chivvy Lizzie along and Tom sped into the family bathroom for a freshen up. I went into our bedroom to sort out my clothes out ready to get dressed when I’d had a quick shower. Tom was soon finished and as he disappeared into the bedroom to get dressed I shot into the bathroom. I was ready in record time and not even flustered. Tom looked stunning as usual in a dark three piece suit with a white dress shirt and plain tie. Lizzie looked gorgeous in a royal blue lace tunic dress and black leggings and I was wearing a dark green sequined top and smart black trousers. Lizzie and I grabbed our jackets and clutch bags and we were ready to go.

                        The venue for the party was a short stroll away, and the evening was fine so we decided to walk. Tom put his arm around my waist and I did the same to him. It felt so comfortable and natural walking down the road with him that I had to pinch myself to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. I wondered if I’d ever get used to it but I was willing to keep trying to find out. When we got to the club I was surprised to see Benedict Cumberbatch and Chris Hemsworth there and then Tom explained that they had paid for the party as our engagement present. I gave them both a big hug of thanks and received a kiss on the cheek from both of them in return. We went inside as a group and I gasped. The room had been beautifully decorated in (what else?) green and gold. It got me thinking about the themes for the wedding. We grabbed a table but didn’t stay there long as the guests were due to start arriving. I was nervous, these were people I did not know and I hoped I’d make a good impression.

            The first people to arrive were Tom’s family and I breathed out a small sigh of relief. At least I’d met them before, but not very often. They looked so pleased for Tom and I. I introduced them to Lizzie; she was on her best behaviour and charmed them completely. I was so proud of her. The other guests started arriving then. To my surprise most of the main cast of Avengers Assemble were there, Chris Evans, Mark Ruffalo, Jeremy Renner, Clark Gregg, Scarlett Johansson and Robert Downey Jr! My poor Lizzie was completely star struck; she was practically hiding in a corner where she thought no one would notice her. Scarlett however did notice and went over to say hello. Lizzie jumped in surprise and I watched more intently.

                        “Hi” I heard Scarlett say “you must be Lizzie, you look so much like your mum” Lizzie blushed furiously but managed to stammer a yes. “What are you doing all on your own over here? Come and join the party!” said Scarlett. Lizzie tried to say that she was fine but Scarlett would not take ‘No’ for an answer, linked arms with Lizzie and proceeded to introduce her to lots of new friends. As I watched Scarlett and Lizzie wander away Tom came and stood by my side. He followed my gaze and understood immediately.

            “Scarlett is one of the ‘good guys’” he murmured in my ear “don’t worry about her and Lizzie, Scarlett knows how old she is”

            I turned to him and hugged him tight “You always know the right thing to say” I murmured back “I’m glad I fell for one of the ‘bad guys’ though, much more fun!” For once he had no answer so he changed the subject “Come on, you need to be introduced to people properly” and with his hand once again around my waist we headed off into the crowd. I was soon on first name terms with everyone in the room. Tom had friends who weren’t in show business and they had been invited too. Chris H and Benedict had done really well. The DJ was brilliant, there were plenty of opportunities for Tom and his friends to show off their legendary dancing skills and, of course, plenty of slower dances for us mere mortals! I must have danced with most of the men in the room and had another wonderful time, Tom claiming me back frequently for a dance or quick kiss.

                        These evening seemed to be going far too quick though and yet again it was soon time to go home. The night was pleasant so we walked back to Tom’s; he had one of his arms around my waist and the other one holding Lizzie’s hand. I chanced a quick look at her face and I realised that it was a long time since I’d seen her that happy. I was so pleased that I’d had a small part to play in that happiness.

                        We got back to Tom’s and went straight to bed. I did so love snuggling up to him in bed at night, he was so warm and comforting, and when I looked at him when he was asleep he was truly beautiful as his face relaxed completely. I could have watched him sleep for hours. I stayed awake for a short while that night watching him sleep and trying to think about all that had happened over the last couple of days, but it was almost too much to process. I was going to marry Tom Hiddleston, Loki himself and I couldn’t be happier.


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In recognition of the fact that I have reached 1000 hits on this story (OMG how did that happen?!), a special treat for you, yes another chapter (Yay!) Don't get too used to it though because I'm rapidly catching myself up and I really don't that to happen or else updates will be a lot slower, saying that there will be my usual update again on Friday. See you then and thanks so much for reading :D

Ch. 21

                        We woke up leisurely on the Sunday morning and had a simple breakfast of cereals and toast. I got dressed particularly carefully and made a point of wearing my Harrods necklace and earrings mainly because they made me feel so special. I walked out into the living room and was pleased to see that Lizzie had dressed smartly too and was also wearing her new earrings. Tom, of course, was wearing his usual dark trousers and white shirt with a tie and waistcoat. I marvelled again that Tom had chosen me above all the women who would have fallen over themselves to be in my position. Just then the intercom buzzed and Tom answered it.

            “Hi Emma, yes come on up” I looked at him puzzled. “Well” he explained “I don’t know how long lunch will be and I don’t want to inconvenience Jeff too much, the Jag is only a two seater and there are three of us so I asked Emma to pick us up.

            “Oh” I said “I see, good plan”

                        Just then Emma knocked on the door and Tom opened it. She walked in and gave her brother a big hug and then crossed over to Lizzie and I and gave us a hug too. I felt myself relax a bit at this, I didn’t mind admitting to myself that I was nervous about the meal, but I didn’t want to let Tom know.

                        We went downstairs and got into Emma’s car. Tom got in the back with me leaving Lizzie the front with Emma, she hesitated but Tom said it was easier for him to remain unobserved if he was in the back seat, so Lizzie got into the passenger seat and started chatting to Emma. Tom and I sat quietly in the back, just holding hands. Tom’s mum lived in a beautiful detached house with a well-established garden and a fairly long drive. As Emma pulled into the driveway my hand gripped Tom’s tighter and he turned to look at me. I was doing my best to show no emotion, but my face must have been betraying my feelings all too well as Tom frowned as he looked at me.

            “Darling, what’s wrong?” he asked, plainly worried

            “Nothing” I lied. I didn’t know how to tell him that I was worried about what his family might ask. I’d met them all a few times before, of course, except Sarah, Tom’s older sister, but that mainly been more of a ‘hello, this is my new girlfriend’ thing as opposed to ‘ hello this will be your future daughter-in-law’, so conversation had mainly been along the lines of how we met and likes and dislikes. I had no idea what Tom had told them in private about me, he’d never mentioned it and I’d never thought to ask and all of a sudden I was terrified that I would make a fool of myself by bursting into tears if they asked about Sean or my parents and it was too late to find out now!

            Tom obviously wasn’t convinced

            Just then Emma turned off the engine and she and Lizzie got out and headed towards the front door.

            “Get out of the car Darling” Tom said softly still holding my hand tight. I did as he said. In a flash he was out of the car too, holding me tight, searching my face for clues as to what could possibly be wrong. I have no idea what he saw there but it seemed the penny dropped for him.

            “Oh my God” he breathed “you’re scared!”

            I just nodded at him and then rested my head on his chest

            “OK” he said still softly, not wishing to make things worse, “we can do this, you and I together. Right?” he gently pushed me away from him so we could look into each other’s eyes and tilted my head slightly to make sure I was.

            “Do you love me?” he asked

            I nodded again

            “I need to hear you say it Darling” he said gently.

            “Yes” I managed

            “And do you trust me?” he continued

            “Yes” I said again, slightly firmer this time

            “Right, then trust that I will be by your side all day and I will not let anyone upset you. Understand?” he said brooking no argument.

            “OK” I said and we turned towards the front door. I was surprised to see Lizzie and Emma just disappearing into the hall. I thought we’d been longer calming me down but apparently not. I stood straighter and raised my head, earning myself a small squeeze of the hand from Tom.

            “Together” he whispered as we got to the front door to be greeted by his mother, Diana, we did have to drop hands for the obligatory hug but as soon as he could Tom’s hand was seeking mine again and I grasped it without thinking.


	22. Chapter 22

Ch. 22

                        Diana led us into the living room where the rest of the family were waiting, Emma and Lizzie were deep in conversation on one sofa and James, Tom’s dad and a lady who could only be Tom’s older sister Sarah were talking together by the fireplace. Everyone turned to look when Tom and I walked in. Sarah immediately excused herself from James and came over to give us both a hug and to introduce herself to me. Still enveloping me in a hug she spoke to me with genuine warmth and sincerity about how happy she was that Tom had finally found someone to share his life with. I relaxed a little more but still sought Tom’s hand as I was released from the hug. Maybe this would be ok after all I thought.

                        Just then Diana called us through to the dining room for lunch and we all trooped into the room. As I entered Diana gave me an apologetic look and said “Tom says you don’t drink wine, is that correct?”

            “Yes” I replied “it’s not just wine, it’s any alcohol really”

            “Oh” said Diana slightly worried now “you wouldn’t object if we had some? It is a celebration after all”

            “Oh goodness no” I floundered “please don’t stop on my account. I’m not teetotal, nor is it against my religion. Alcohol and I just don’t get on too well” Another small squeeze of my hand from Tom told me I was doing something right and I turned to him and gave him a small smile, which he returned. The seating arrangements were easy, Lizzie sat next to Emma, Tom claimed two seats on one of the long sides for us and James, Diana and Sarah slotted into the places that were left. Tom couldn’t hold my hand all through the meal of course so he adapted by pressing his leg into mine at all times, helped by the fact that his legs were so long that he didn’t seem to be able to sit with his legs closed to be honest. I didn’t mind though, I was grateful for the constant reassurance and his support.

                        I realised very quickly though that Tom must have told his family quite a lot about my life as there was only one really unsettling question and that was Sarah asking if my parents were pleased. The pressure on my leg intensified as Tom tried to tell me that everything would be ok and so I managed to stammer out the fact that my parents were dead. Poor Sarah looked so embarrassed that I immediately tried to make her feel better by having a small dig at Tom for not telling her, which he took in good grace, his leg still a constant pressure on mine which I took to be a good sign.

                        The conversation soon turned to wedding plans and it was my turn to press hard against Tom’s leg quickly for reassurance. Tom explained that we had only been engaged two days so naturally nothing had been discussed between us yet. Further discussions centred on when the wedding may be because Sarah would need a bit of notice to get over from India where she worked and we promised her that she would be among the first to know. Lunch over Tom and I cleared the table and went into the kitchen to do the washing up. Sarah came to help and, I suppose, find out a little more about me. I didn’t mind too much though as I knew she was only really looking out for her ‘little’ brother. Washing up over we went back into the living room and Tom’s family delighted in telling me stories of the young Tom, most of which seemed to show his mischievous side. My favourite story involved Tom and his cousin hiding under the bed instead of having their intended bath. They only revealed themselves when Tom’s Auntie called the Police!

                        By the time his family had finished Tom’s cheeks were a very fetching pale pink, well the bits of his face I could see through his splayed fingers as he held his head in his hands in embarrassment. I gave him a consoling rub of his shoulders and said

            “Don’t worry Love, I have an excellent memory and I’ll make sure I don’t forget any of these wonderful stories”

            Tom groaned into his hands. “Thanks” he said sarcastically “that really helps” but he looked up and gave me a fond smile. “Where are Lizzie and Emma?” he asked suddenly.

            “I don’t know” I said realising they were missing

            “Don’t worry” Sarah piped up “I think Emma has found the little sister she always wanted! They disappeared upstairs to Emma’s old room a little while ago” and indeed as we listened we could hear giggling coming down the stairs. The door to the living room opened and the two girls came in faces full of smiles and obviously getting on like long lost friends or indeed sisters. Emma looked at Tom and I and asked if Lizzie could have a sleepover. I was a bit shocked as Emma was older than Lizzie by over ten years. Tom just seemed amused.

            “Please?” Emma pleaded “I always wanted a little sister and I didn’t get sleepovers when I was little”

            Tom and Sarah chuckled and exchanged an ‘I told you so’ look. Lizzie put her hands together in supplication and gave me her best puppy dog eyes.

            “OK” I said with a huge smile on my face. Lizzie and Emma turned and hugged each other just like they were both teenagers instead of just one of them.

            “Brilliant” said Emma “We’ll grab some stuff when I take you home and I’ll bring her back sometime on Tuesday, is that OK?” she dropped her voice and said only to Tom and I “That should give you some quality time together”

            “Thank you” said Tom and I in unison and we smiled

            “Thanks Mum” Lizzie said over her shoulder as Emma dragged her out of the room again to goodness knows where. When it was time to go we called the girls and said goodbye to everyone with many hugs and kisses and promises to stay in touch by whatever means necessary.


	23. Chapter 23

Ch. 23

                        When we got back to Tom’s apartment Lizzie and Emma disappeared into Lizzie’s room to pack for her sleepover. They were finished in record time and were gone before we knew it with a cheery ‘see you Tuesday’. As soon as the front door shut behind them I flopped down on the sofa with a huge sigh. I’d done it; I’d survived the most hectic and stressful three days of my life. Tom came and sat beside me pulling me into a proper ‘Hiddles Hug’.

            “Alone at last” he murmured in my ear and kissed my slowly from my ear to my lips. The tenderness he showed proved to me he’d fully understood my fears from earlier and accepted that I needed him to support me through any trying times just as I would be there for him through thick and thin.

            “What shall we do?” he mused

            I smiled to myself; I’d had some ideas in that direction “Well….” I started “did the champagne and chocolates get here from the first party?”

            Tom looked puzzled “Yes” he said “the champagne is in the fridge and the chocolates are on the side. Why?”

            “I’m feeling a bit naughty” I confessed “I really, really fancy a long hot bubble bath with a drink, a proper drink and a beautiful man to wash by back” I raised by eyebrows at him hopefully. A slow smile spread over Tom’s face making him look even more gorgeous than usual.

            “You want to get drunk?” he guessed

            “I want” I emphasised “to celebrate the fact that I’ve just gotten engaged to the most gorgeous man in the whole world, and the fact that we are truly alone for tonight, all you’d have to do would be to get me to bed, no cars, no steps, and I’ll even dress in my night clothes after my bath to make it really easy for you” it was my turn for the puppy dog eyes.

            “Right” he said “I’ll start running your bath then, shall I?”

            I grabbed him and kissed him before he could move, hard and passionate on the lips. “I love you so much” I said as I broke the kiss.

            “I know” he said smiling as he pulled away to run the bath

                        Tom took my idea and made it his own, within ten minutes the bathroom was studded with candles giving off a lovely glow and the bath was full of lovely hot bubbly water. The champagne flutes were on the side and there was even an ice bucket with the rest of the bottle in it. The chocolates were there too and I liked my lips in anticipation. Tom started to unbutton his shirt and I went over to help him.

            “I don’t want to get my clothes wet” he explained but I wasn’t sure I believed him, if he had better ideas for the rest of the evening I wasn’t going to complain, as long as I got a relaxing bath. I undid his trousers and let them fall to the floor; he removed them along with his shoes and socks, leaving his boxer shorts on. Tom then turned his attention to me, he pulled me into a loving embrace and undid the zip at the back of my dress, he slowly slid my arms out of the short sleeves and slid the dress to the floor, hands gliding down my sides, never losing contact with my skin as it was revealed. By the time the dress was pooled at my feet my whole body was covered in goosebumps. I stepped carefully out of the folds of fabric (It wouldn’t do to fall over at this point) and Tom planted soft kisses on the bits of my skin he could reach as he moved to remove my underwear. In no time at all it seemed I was only wearing a smile, which seemed permanently attached to my face and my Harrods jewellery.

            “We’d better remove these as well Darling” he said softly “I’ll do the necklace but I’m going to leave the earrings up to you”

            “Chicken” I said

            “Yes” he replied unapologetically. We quickly removed the jewellery and put it safe. Tom then held out his hand to me and I accepted it graciously as he helped me into the bath. I sighed in contentment as I sank under the water; it was the perfect temperature for me.

            Tom smiled at my happiness as he passed me a glass of champagne and unwrapped a chocolate. He regarded the chocolate speculatively, the distinctive gold foil and brown paper case lying discarded on the floor

            “You know” he said slowly “I think these may be my favourite chocolates of all”

            “That’s a coincidence” I replied “they’re my favourites too” and I leaned over the side of the bath so Tom could put the delicate morsel in my mouth. Quick as a flash the chocolate was I Tom’s mouth! His eyes danced with mischief as I pouted at him. His long nimble fingers quickly unwrapped another chocolate and this time it was mine. I laid back in the bath letting the chocolate melt in my mouth, crunching the wafer and savouring the roasted hazelnuts. I sipped my champagne and looked at Tom over the top of my glass. He looked simply stunning, sitting on the floor legs curled to one side, not an ounce of excess flesh anywhere, nicely toned arms and a body and legs to die for and he was all mine, well mine and a few hundred thousand fangirls who would give their right arm to be where I was now. He glanced up and saw me looking at him “Penny for your thoughts Darling?”

            I broke out of my reverie and said simply “If your fans could see us now”

            “I’d be very worried because they would be in my flat” he chuckled I giggled too and indicated that I would like another chocolate. Tom had another one too and we both sighed in contentment.

When we could speak again Tom looked at me shyly “Darling, would you mind if I didn’t just wash your back?”

I looked at him confused “What do you mean?” I stammered

He took my hand nearest him and cradled it lovingly in his two big hands. “I mean, if you’d permit me I’d like to wash all of you, well at least as much as you’d be happy with” he stated.

“Oh” I floundered, caught completely unawares “OK, if you really want to.”

“I really want to” he said gently “but you can stop me at any time if you want. Fair?”

I nodded, not quite sure what to expect now. Tom rose gracefully to his feet and went to the side of the room where he collected my shower gel, a body puff and a loofah. He quickly raised a lather on the loofah and proceeded to wash my back. He knew just how much pressure to apply to make it relaxing but also cleansing and it felt wonderful. The hand not holding the loofah was constantly moving over my back, brushing, smoothing and soothing all at the same time.

When he’d finished my back he asked me to lay back and I did, he lathered up the body puff next and took one of my hands in his whilst he washed my arm and shoulder. It was the most relaxing thing that had ever happened to me. The other arm done he helped me to stand and did my torso and legs but not my most intimate area, that, he carefully avoided. The purpose of the bath was relaxation not arousal after all. When I was rinsed off he wrapped me in a huge bath sheet and dried me carefully. I was so relaxed I was like putty in his arms and he smiled at me gratefully. “Thank you Darling, that was wonderful” he said.

“Mmm” I replied “you can do that again anytime”

“As you wish” he said with a smile and left the room suddenly, he returned quickly with our night clothes and I changed into my pyjamas. Tom put his pyjama bottoms and a T shirt on, wrapped an arm around my shoulder and let me to the living room. There was a heap of blankets on the sofa and Tom made sure I was comfy and settled with the rest of the champagne and chocolates to hand.

“So what shall we watch Darling?” he asked

“Oh I don’t mind” I said “something that won’t break the mood?”

Tom hummed for a bit before selecting a film and putting it in the player. He snuggled under the blankets with me and wrapped his arm around me. This was something I could really get used to I thought as I snuggled as close as I could to him. We sipped the champagne and ate the chocolates whilst we watched the film and then it was time for bed.

“How’s your nose” Tom asked kindly

“Hmm, now you come to mention it, I can’t feel the tip” I giggled.

Tom just smiled at me “Thought so” He stood up and divested us of all but one blanket which he kept wrapped around me. The next thing I knew I was being picked up bridal style and carried to the bedroom.

“Bed time Darling” he said “so much easier this way!”

I didn’t even have my arms free to drape around his neck but I felt so safe in those strong muscular arms that I wasn’t worried. Once in the bedroom I saw he’d turned the bedding back to make his life a bit easier and he laid me gently on my side on the bed and took the blanket off. He got into bed too and I snuggled as close as I could. Those wonderful arms snaked around me again and he kissed me on top of my head.

“Sleep now Darling” he whispered “I’ve got you, you’re safe”

“I know” I managed and I drifted off to sleep.


	24. Chapter 24

Ch.24

            When I woke up Tom’s side of the bed was empty and cold. I was slightly worried until I felt something strange between my fingers. I was holding a note. I blinked a couple of times to focus and then read it. In a fairly elegant scrawl he’d written

           Darling, gone for a run. I’ll bring back breakfast. Love Tom x x x

I smiled to the world in general, he really was perfect! I got up and wrapped last nights discarded blanket around me as I made my way to the sofa. I’d only just sat down when I heard a key in the lock as Tom came back. He was wearing a light grey hoodie and black running trousers. His face was flushed, his hair was a mess and he still looked wonderful! He walked straight into the kitchen to deposit the paper carrier bag he was holding. I dropped the blanket from my shoulders and crept up behind him. I must have made too much noise though as he suddenly whirled around, grasped me in his arms and pulled me close. He kissed the top of my head affectionately and I burrowed into his chest breathing in a very heady mix of Tom’s own natural scent overlaid with the smell of exercise.

“Mmm” I hummed appreciatively “you smell so good!”

“Ehehehe” he chuckled “I do not. I need a shower, give me ten minutes?

“OK” I sighed “but that smell will never get old for me. I find it somewhat intoxicating”

Ton disentangled himself from the hug, gave me a kiss on the lips and strode off to have a shower. I could definitely get used to this I mused and then realised that I would have to when I married him and I smiled at the world again.

            It was less than ten minutes before he was back though, his hair still damp though it wouldn’t take long to dry. He was wearing jeans and a T-shirt today, one that didn’t leave much to the imagination as he padded across the flat in his bare feet.

“Good morning Darling” he smiled and kissed me on the lips again

“Good morning Love” I responded, kissing him back “Good run?”

“Yes thank you” he said “did you miss me?”

“Yes” I pouted “the bed was empty and cold when I woke up” I smiled at him all the same to take any sting out of my words. Tom realised I was teasing him and swept me into his arms for a hug. He rubbed my back as well and murmured

“Better now Darling”

“Much better” I giggled

“Right then, breakfast” he announced and we went into the kitchen. The contents of the paper bag proved to be fresh French pastries. There were croissants, pain au Chocolat and pain au raisen. I quickly made myself a cup of coffee and Tom a cup of his favourite Earl Grey tea and we took the drinks and plates to the dining table to eat.

            Whilst we were eating Tom told me if the idea he’d had for Lizzie’s birthday which was now only nine days away. He wanted to buy her a recording session.

“Just an afternoon one!” he said hurriedly as he saw my face.

“Tom!” I protested “it’s too much!”

“Nonsense” he retorted “she deserves this. I can afford it, but if it makes you feel any better think of it partly as an investment”

I looked at him, perplexed

“Lizzie and her band have talent” he explained “if she wants to take it further it would be good for her to know what she’s getting into, and besides it will be great fun.”

I had no answer to such a reasoned argument so I held my hand up in defeat “What do you want me to do?” I asked.

“Can you get the girls up to London next Tuesday?” he asked

“I suspect so” I replied “but why Tuesday, Lizzie’s birthday is on Wednesday?”

“I know” he said “I’ve got it all planned. The girls will spend Tuesday night at Emma’s and meet us at the recording studio so it’s a surprise, and then I thought we could take them all out to dinner and then they could all have a sleepover at ours”

“OK, OK” I huffed “just spoiling het the two days, right?”

“Yes” he said placatingly “just the two days”

“Sounds wonderful” I said “you’re sure Emma will be ok with it?”

“Oh yes” he said confidently “I’ve already arranged it with her.” He decided to quickly change the subject “so what do you want to do today?”

I thought for a moment and then had a flash of inspiration “Something for you” I said decisively “something you really want to do but don’t get a chance to often. You’ve spent the whole weekend and many others entertaining Lizzie and I and now it’s time for you.”

Tom looked out of the window deep in thought. I followed his gaze, it was a lovely summer’s morning and we had the whole day together until Tom had to go to the theatre for his play. Suddenly Tom’s whole expression lightened and he flashed me one of his trademark broad grins. “I’ve got it!” he said “an early picnic lunch in the park and then an early show at the cinema. It should all fit in; I don’t have to leave until 5:30 at the latest”

“Sounds fantastic” I said, glad he’d thought of something. “What time do we have to leave here?”

Tom looked at his watch, considering, “In about an hour?” he suggested “We can take a gentle stroll to the park via a couple of very nice speciality shops to pick up lunch, have a long lazy meal and then go to the cinema.”

“Perfect” I smiled “I’ll go and get ready” I scooted off to the bathroom to have a shower. The more I thought the day ahead the happier I was that Tom was getting to do what he wanted for a change. He was so kind, always thinking of others so it was nice to be able to give something back.

I pulled on a pair of jeans and a pretty T-shirt and went back to the living room where Tom was just shutting the lid of his laptop.

“I was just checking film times” he explained. “There’s that new rom-com on an early showing at the local cinema if that’s ok?”

“That sounds wonderful” I sighed happily “a romantic film to go with our romantic day”

“Talking of romantic” Tom started “”I’ve been meaning to give you a present for a while but never seem to have had the right opportunity.” He produced a small colourful box from next to his laptop and presented it to me. “Go on, open it” he encouraged and I did. Inside were a pair of colourful keys, I looked at Tom, perplexed. Seeing my confusion he stood up to better explain. He took the keys out of the box and held them up. “This one” he said indicating a blue tartan key, “is the key to the main door of the building, and this one” he pointed to the other key, bright red with smiley faces on it “is my front door key. Now you can come and go as you please if I’m not here”

I threw my arms around his neck in a big hug “Thank you Tom” I said “Thank you from the bottom of my heart, this means so much to me” I stopped suddenly and Tom frowned at me. “I need to get you one for the cottage cut for you, I should have thought of it sooner. It would be safer than hiding a key under a plant pot!” I said, upset that I hadn’t thought about it sooner considering how much time Tom had spent there.

Tom quickly pulled me in again for a hug and a meaningful kiss “You’re being a silly goose again” he chuckled “it doesn’t matter who gave their house key over first”

“You’re right” I sighed “sorry for over reacting”

“Its fine Darling” he said, rubbing my back gently again “are you ready to leave?”

I put my new keys safely on my keyring, grabbed my handbag and a light jacket and said “I am now”

Tom snagged a jumper off the back of the sofa and picked up his messenger bag which was bulging weirdly. Catching me eyeing the bag he patted it and said “Just a few essentials Darling” and headed through the front door with me half a pace behind.


	25. Chapter 25

Ch. 25

When we got onto the street Tom, ever the gentleman put the messenger bag on his right shoulder and walked on the outside of the pavement, his left arm curled around my waist, pulling me close. As usual he modified his stride so that I could keep up and we sauntered through the back streets until we came to a small row of shops, including a bakers, a deli, and a greengrocers. We bought some lovely soft granary rolls and some small cakes from the bakery and then we went to the deli for cheese, cold meat and a couple of slices of delicious looking quiche. They also stocked fruit flavoured waters that Tom said I just had to try. Finally we went to the greengrocers to get grapes, cherries and strawberries. Lunch sorted we continued on our way, avoiding the main roads as much as possible. It was so nice just to walk; talking of nothing in particular, no rushing, and no pressure just two people enjoying a stroll.

When we got to the park we made our way to a secluded corner and stopped under the dappled shade of a large tree. Tom took his bag and opened it and the reason for the weird bulging was immediately apparent, it was stuffed with flatware, cutlery and condiments to go with our lunch, there was even a blanket so lay on. I was seriously impressed. We spread our lunch between us on the blanket and settled down to enjoy the food, company and the view.

Once the meal was over Tom checked his watch and smiled happily “We have ages before we have to get to the cinema” he said and lay back on the blanket patting it beside him as soon as he was settled. I needed no second invitation and sighed contentedly as I snuggled beside him. After a minute or two Tom murmured softly “I’ve been thinking about our wedding.”

“Oh yes?” I replied, wondering when he’d found time to do that seeing we had only gotten engaged four days previously “and what have you been thinking?” I asked.

“That I’d like to get married on the anniversary of the day we met” he said quietly.

I twisted so that I could look him square in the face, completely stunned. I did a quick mental calculation and gasped “You mean in about seven months?” I stuttered “a whole wedding in seven months?”

“Yes” he said simply “it’s perfect. We met on a Friday so the day next year will be a Saturday so our friends should be free and those that need to clear their diaries have plenty of time to do so. To be honest with you I really don’t want to wait that long but this should give everyone just enough notice”

“Everyone but me!” I muttered under my breath.

He adjusted his position so that he could give me a hug. “It will be fine” he reassured me “you’ll see, I will help as much as I can. I want to be involved in the start of our life together as much as possible.”

“You promise you’ll help?” I said firmly

“As much as I can” he reiterated”

“And not just with the fun stuff?” I continued, determined to make sure. “I mean there’s the colour scheme, flowers, cake , invites, clothes, transport, seating plan…”

I was cut off as he ,smiling, placed a hand gently over my mouth. “Yes Darling, all of it, even the stuff you obviously haven’t thought about yet” he said with a chuckle but his eyes showed nothing but sincerity “I know I’ll be away for some of it but I’m sure we can sort something out. Actually I’ve already made a bit of a start”

“Tom!” I said in exasperation “when exactly in the last four days have you found the time to do wedding planning?”

Incredibly he started to blush! He turned away from me slightly and refused to meet my eyes. “Tom!” I said with a warning clear in my voice “when did you start planning?”

“About three weeks ago” he said sheepishly.

I sat there staring at him “before we got engaged?” I checked.

“Yes” he said, still blushing “ I started when I got home the weekend you said you were being made redundant. You’re not too mad are you?” he asked hopefully.

“You really were sure I’d say ‘yes’ weren’t you?” I said in a quiet voice, all anger and surprise gone.

“Absolutely” he said turning finally to look at again “I spoke to Lizzie and she practically told me to get on with it. She spoke about the way your eyes lit up when I contacted you and that sealed it for me. Am I forgiven?” and he turned those puppy dog eyes on me again.

I couldn’t resist those eyes and he knew it. “Yes” I sighed “forgiven” and I leant over to kiss him. “I wondered how Ben and Chris got the London party set up so quickly and now I know” I whispered in his ear as I moved back to lie beside him. He chuckled and I could feel the vibrations through his chest. “My darling, neither of them are that good! Of course they knew in advance!” he murmured. We lay still for a bit longer and the Tom checked his watch again.

“So Jackie, what’s it to be” he said quietly “movie or home?”

“Movie please” I answered quickly and with that we packed away the remains of our picnic and went to the cinema.

            The film was very good and we came out of the cinema smiling at each other broadly. We rushed back to Tom’s flat so he could get ready for his play which was starting the last week of its run. He was out of the house again within forty minutes leaving me with a kiss and a promise to see me later.

            After he’d gone I had a few phone calls to make to the parents of Lizzie’s band to invite the girls to London for the Tuesday and the Wednesday of the following week, all expenses paid. It took some time to convince each set of parents that the girls would be fine. Emma and I would meet them at Paddington station and take them to Emma’s house where they would stay one night and then they would stay with us at Tom’s for the birthday night, travelling back on the Thursday. All parties were, of course, sworn to secrecy as I knew how much the girls text each other when they weren’t together. The parents eventually all said yes and after asking after Tom and myself everyone seemed happy with the arrangements. One final phone call to Emma to tell her it was all on and I’d done everything I could. Glancing at the clock I realised that I would have just enough time to get to the theatre and surprise Tom as he came out, an opportunity not to be missed. I quickly changed into something smart yet casual, grabbed my bag and keys and headed into the City. The underground was easy to navigate and I soon reached my destination. I left the station and made my way to the spot where I’d hidden with Luke just a few short weeks ago. Whilst I was waiting for Tom to appear from the stage door I decided to play a game with him. I set my phone to silent, the TARDIS landing would be a dead giveaway and composed a text to send him when he was alone it read:

_Boo! If you can find me I’ll buy you supper :P_

Just as I finished writing the text the stage door opened and Tom appeared and was immediately surrounded by the usual gaggle of fangirls. I smiled to myself, not so long ago I would have done almost anything to be where they were, even if I was closer to Tom’s age than they were. As usual Tom gave them all his undivided attention, taking numerous selfies and signing posters, programmes and DVDs as they were thrust in his direction, his generous smile never faltering. I found myself feeling proud of him even though how he acted towards his fans was nothing whatsoever to do with me.

It didn’t seem too long before the last girl got her hug and selfie and disappeared into the night. I quickly hit ‘send’ on my phone and dumped it into my pocket so the screen light would not give me away. The doorway I was standing in was completely in the shadows so there was no chance of Tom finding me too quickly. I heard his text alert go off and I supressed a giggle. As Tom span around slowly on the spot I shrank back further into my little alcove, trying to make myself invisible. Tom, however, remembered when I had snuck up on him the last time I was there and he unerringly ended up facing in my direction. He started to stalk towards my hiding place, a very Loki like look on his face. I shivered in anticipation as he got closer and closer to me. When he had gotten to within two meters of me without deviating, I stepped out of the alcove with a huge smile on my face.

“Guess I should have found a better spot. Surprise?”

Tom’s expression changed in a heartbeat, from feral and cunning to open and laughing. “Nice try Darling, but now you owe me supper!”

“Fair enough” I responded “where would you like to go?”

“I know a lovely little Italian just around the corner that will be nice and quiet at this time of night, you can take be there” he extended his arm towards me and I linked arms with him as he led me to the restaurant. We had a lovely supper and finished off with delicious deserts. Tom refused to let me pay and then escorted me home.

As we cuddled in bed that night we both thanked each other for the lovely weekend. Lizzie was due back the next day although we were not sure what time to expect her. We’d had a lovely time, just the two of us, though even Tom admitted that he’d missed her. I was pleased to think that their relationship was so good; he was going to make a fantastic stepdad.


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's a short chapter this week, but it was a nice long one last week. Thank you again to you all for reading. I hope you are still enjoying it. See you next week. Roo

Ch. 26

           Lizzie messaged me just before lunch on the Tuesday to say she would be back mid-afternoon. Tom and I had a lazy morning, doing nothing in particular, he was surfing the net on his laptop and I was half-heartedly tidying up around him, learning where everything went. Suddenly as I walked behind him, Tom snaked out an arm and practically pulled me over the back of the sofa. I squealed in surprise as he managed to get me sitting next to him (more or less)

“What do you think of this Darling?” he said, gesturing me to look at the screen on his lap. I gasped in amazement. The pictures on the website were of a classic English Stately home, complete with pillars around the front door and a sweeping driveway. The house looked Georgian in style and also vaguely familiar, but I wasn’t sure from where. More pictures showed the interior and it was every bit as grand as the exterior. The focal point of the hall was a huge staircase with sweeping arms from both wings of the house, meeting on a landing before descending a few steps to the ground. There was also a large ballroom and a beautiful Orangery.

“It’s stunning” I managed eventually

“Mmm, it is” Tom agreed “I shot something there about ten years of more ago and the pictures do not do it justice. But what I really wanted you to see is this” and he clicked on a heading on the website.

A large picture of a bride and groom appeared in the middle of the screen and I finally grasped what Tom was getting at.

“Oh” I breathed, looking up slowly into his face which was hopeful.

“Do you like it?” he asked softly

“Yes, it’s gorgeous” I replied “But…. “ I stopped not sure how to voice the thoughts going round in my head.

“But what? He encouraged cradling my cheek in one of his large, warm hands.

I decided to metaphorically bite the bullet “I somehow thought you’d want a church wedding, it being your first one”

He looked at me shocked “Wherever did you get that idea from?” he queried

“Um…..” great now I felt foolish “I don’t know, I just thought…….” I tailed off, blushing madly

He pulled me close for a gentle, firm hug “Oh silly goose. I would marry you anywhere in a heartbeat, you know that. I want what you want for this wedding."

I pulled away from him slightly, looking up, searching his face. I saw only adoration there.

“Shall I phone them and check for availability?” he asked.

“Yes” I said, already imagining Tom and I surrounded by friends and in his case family in that Orangery, making our vows.

“Can I borrow your phone?” he asked “don’t want just anyone to have my personal number if this doesn’t work” I handed my phone over and he quickly typed in the number. When the call was answered Tom immediately slipped into a soft Welsh accent”

“Oh good morning, is that Eddington Court?”

“It is? Oh good. I’m phoning to find out your availability for next February, I wondered if the weekend of the 28th was free?”

“Oh that’s marvellous. Can I make an appointment to come and see you to discuss details? The week after next?” he turned to me and raised that eyebrow. I nodded back at him vigorously. “That’s brilliant, Wednesday morning the week after next will be fine. My name?” he glanced in my direction and said, still in that beautiful Welsh accent. “William Thomas”

My hands flew to my mouth to supress the laughter that threatened to overflow. I raised both my eyebrows at him as if to say <Really, that’s the best you can come up with?> The call over he handed me back my phone and I burst out laughing.

“What?” he questioned

“William Thomas, is that really the best you can come up with? Mind you the accent was very good.”

“I’d like to see you do better!” he smirked and then launched a full on tickle attack on me. I squealed and squirmed but there was no getting away from those long arms and devastatingly accurate fingers. When I was reduced to a heap on the floor, struggling to breathe he finally relented.

“OK, OK” I said, staying on the floor, just in case the attack recommenced “I’m sorry I laughed at you, but it was a little bit funny”

He huffed a little and then slid down to join me on the floor “I need to come up with a better alias then” he chuckled.

“Yes” I replied “we can work on that”


	27. Chapter 27

Ch.27

Lizzie arrived home soon after, full of news about her weekend with Emma, which she shared with us over a latish lunch before Tom had to go to work again. He’d promised us tickets for the last night and, of course, the last night party. We couldn’t wait because of what the end of the play promised us as an ‘almost’ family. True it was only going to be a short time before Tom went to the States but it was in the school summer holidays so we could be together as much as we wanted.

My darling daughter and I had some much needed quality time together that evening; there was so much to talk about as we’d hardly stopped to draw breath since the previous Friday.

“You are ok with all of this?” I asked. I had to hear her say it, that she didn’t mind another man in my life who wasn’t her father. She gave me a look that she could only have learnt from me and said.

“Of course I am Mum. I can see that Tom makes you so happy, that I feel guilty for not realising how sad you were before”

I gasped at her words “Was I that bad?” I queried, worried about what she might say.

“Well” she started “I don’t remember the early years without Dad very well but as I got older I realised that you weren’t always really happy, and then of course we lost Granny and Grandad and that seemed to be the nail in the coffin for any chance of you having happiness again” she pulled me into a hug and continued “I am truly happy that you have found someone wonderful to spend the rest of your life with. Tom really cares about you, about us, and he seems even nicer in real life than comes across in his interviews. So, yes, I am ok with all of this, and besides I’ll get the best stepdad in the world!”

“Thank you darling, thank you so much, you always know the right thing to say” I tightened the hug and kissed her on the cheek. We had been through so much together and now, it seemed, that we might even get a ‘happily ever after’. We stayed sitting for a while having a good mother / daughter natter until Lizzie said she was going to bed. I looked at my watch, Tom was not due home for a fair while yet so I decided to indulge myself and put on Henry V from the Hollow Crown series, well I wasn’t going to enjoy anybody else’s performance when I could watch Tom was I?

            I settled back down on the sofa, ready to immerse myself in mediaeval England. I must have drifted off to sleep because the next thing I knew Henry was talking in my ear still but saying my name instead of Katherine’s. I slowly came to, to the feel of a hand caressing my cheek as Tom tried to wake me gently. Once I realised what had happened I woke up a lot quicker.

“Sorry” I gasped “I was going to wait up for you”

“There’s no need for that Darling” Tom responded with a smile “did I interrupt a good dream?”

“I don’t think so” I replied “Why?”

Tom chuckled “as I was trying to wake you up I could swear you called me Henry!”

“Oh no! Really?” I blushed scarlet “I’m so sorry”

Don’t be” he countered “just curious though, Henry not Loki?”

“Well I love Loki a lot” I started “but Henry and Hal are my ‘go to’ when I want pure unadulterated culture. You played them both so well, so differently, even though they are essentially the same person, and my favourite bit is when you are trying to communicate with Katherine in France.” I unsuccessfully supressed a yawn.

Tom had turned slightly pink at my explanation “One day in the not too distant future” he promised “you and I are going to have a nice long conversation about Shakespeare, but for now...” he straightened his posture slightly, adjusted his expression to a more closed and regal look and held out his arm to me “My Lady Jackie, permit us to escort thee to thy chambers” he said perfectly in character as Henry V. I reached out and took the proffered arm and Tom / Henry pulled me gracefully to my feet.

“Gladly my liege” I said trying to match his demeanour and stifle a giggle at the same time as we walked towards the bedroom.

 

 


	28. Chapter 28

Ch. 28

            It seemed no time at all until it was the last night of the play that had brought us together. Tom had got us the promised seats and, dressed up to the nines, Lizzie, Luke, Tom and I all got into the limo with Jeff driving, to head into town.

            The performance was the best I’d seen it. After so long it was polished and honed to perfection. The cast fully deserved their standing ovation and four curtain calls. Tom was smiling so wide I thought he might never stop. The closing party was held in the theatre bar after the audience had departed. It was lovely and cosy. A beautiful buffet had been laid on and of course there was an open bar. I stuck to my usual fruit juice, so that Tom could enjoy the party without having to worry about what state I would be in going home. He was on the Jameson’s whiskey all night but taking it slow, too busy talking to do much drinking. I was introduced to everyone this time as Tom’s fiancée, no ambiguity about that and congratulations were received from everybody, especially from those who’d been with the play in Bath and had wondered what Tom had been doing with his weekends to always be so cheerful on a Monday morning.

            The party broke up in the early hours of the morning with many good wishes to all for future projects and, positive, life changing events! Jeff picked us up from outside the theatre and suddenly there we were neither Tom of I had any work commitments for the immediate future. It felt so strange and we just grinned at each other like loons all the way back to Tom’s. Luke did manage to inject a note of seriousness when he reminded Tom that they would still have to have their weekly meeting to discuss any forthcoming projects. Tom had already told me about this but was firm in telling Luke that the coming week was ‘out of bounds’. Luke agreed and we dropped him at his home with plans to meet with Tom the week after next.

            When we got back home, because it really felt like home now, we slipped off our shoes and outer garments and slumped on the sofa. Lizzie, bless her, went and put the kettle on and made us a cup of tea, which was most welcome. When the drinks were finished we went to bed.

            The next day was a Sunday and with nothing to do we all, even Tom, managed a decent lay-in. in fact no one was up before mid-day. Because we’d skipped breakfast I decided to do a full roast dinner so I popped to the local shops to pick up what was needed. When I got home I set to preparing the meal and was soon joined by Tom to help which led to some interesting manoeuvres in his small galley kitchen, but we managed. We had roast beef with all the trimmings and an apple crumble with clotted cream or ice cream for dessert. We sat around the dining table eating good food and planning what we were going to do with our free time. Lizzie took the opportunity to remind us that the coming Wednesday was het fifteenth birthday and both Tom and I feigned surprise though I don’t think she was fooled.

            Lunch over we repaired to the sofa and perused Tom’s extensive DVD collection for something to watch. A film chosen we put it on and settled back to enjoy it. I sat next to Tom, as usual, snuggled under his arm which he draped over my shoulders. I could have stayed there forever. In fact, apart from comfort breaks and the odd cup of tea, we did stay there for the rest of the afternoon and well into the night. When I started to get tired Tom rearranged me on the sofa so that my head was in his lap and started running his fingers through my hair. It was enough to send me to sleep. I didn’t even wake when he carried me to bed as proved by the fact that I had no idea how I’d got there when I woke up the next morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's a short chapter this week, I still hope you enjoy it though. Thank you all for reading as always, Comments are always welcome and will be answered. Thanks Roo


	29. Chapter 29

Ch. 29

            I managed to slip out on my own on the Monday to get Lizzie’s present from me. I’d chosen a gold charm bracelet with black and green chunky beads and a couple of charms, a treble clef to represent her love of music and a rose to represent her band. I knew she’d love it and it could be added to as and when required. Sneaky texts were also sent and received during the day confirming the plans for the day after when Abbie, Leah, and Shannon would be arriving for their part of the birthday surprise. They comprised Lizzie’s band The Roses with Lizzie herself using the stage name Thorne. Not having my car with me and not willing to risk the Jaguar I had decided to hire a car for two days to help Emma do all the running around. It would be a tight squeeze in her car but we’d manage, at least they wouldn’t need much luggage, comfy clothes for the studio and smart wear for the meal, and their bedding of course. Tom’s job the next day was to keep Lizzie occupied whilst Emma and I collected The Roses from Paddington train station and took them to Emma’s. As far as I could tell, Lizzie was still completely unaware of all the planning going on behind her back for which I was grateful.

The birthday eve dawned bright and fair. Tom and I acted as if it was just another day for us, even though we were still getting used to being together so much. It was really nice though, the odd stolen kiss, or a brief caress, even just a look sometimes was all it took for my heart to flutter madly in my chest and wonder for the umpteenth time why I’d been the lucky one Tom had picked to spend the rest of his life with. I was beginning to realise that what I’d felt for Sean was nothing like what I felt for Tom, this was a different kind of love based on respect and understanding and treating a woman like she wants to be treated, not that Sean mistreated me, he just didn’t make me feel as safe, protected and loved as Tom did with every word and gesture. I definitely preferred Tom’s love!

            The morning passed peacefully, Lizzie was practicing her guitar in her room whilst I made her birthday cake that was to be transported to the restaurant the following day, probably in the time Emma and I would be back and forth between her house and Tom’s whilst Lizzie and The Roses were at the recording studio.

            The train from Wiltshire was due in late afternoon and Emma was nice and early, texting me to let me know that she was downstairs so that I could let Tom know I was going and slip out without Lizzie realizing. We arrived at the station with time to spare and Emma spent it telling me how happy she was that her ‘big’ brother had finally found someone to settle down with, how much she loved Lizzie and I and what a brilliant job I’d done bringing up Lizzie in such trying circumstances. She had me blushing far too easily. Luckily, before she could make me any redder, the train from the West Country was announced and we headed to the correct platform. Surprisingly The Roses were easy to spot amongst the crowd and after I’d introduced them to Emma and they’d got over their excitement at meeting a celebrity’s sister we loaded the luggage in the car and Emma drove me home before leaving with the girls for the night. I just knew they’d have a great time. Just before I got out of the car I confirmed the time for the next day. I slipped back into Tom’s place without Lizzie even noticing I’d gone out and flashed Tom a quick, subtle, thumbs up to indicate all had gone smoothly. He flashed me a grin in response.

The next morning Tom got up to make Lizzie her favourite breakfast, an American concoction of pancakes, bacon and maple syrup; it’s not something she got often at home as I’m a lousy pancake maker. I retrieved her present from its hiding place in our bedroom and placed it on the dining table at her place. Then I went to get her up.

“Rise and shine Birthday Girl” I sang out as I opened her bedroom door. She burrowed down further under the covers, so that all I could see was the top of her head. “Ah well, if you don’t want the special breakfast that Tom has made for you” I said “that just means there will be more bacon for us!”

That did the trick, the covers moved back and Lizzie appeared looking adorably tousled. She sniffed appreciatively at the air and made her way to the table just as Tom was dishing up. Her eyes grew wider as she saw what was for breakfast and she launched herself at him, nearly knocking him off balance; he managed to stay upright, but only just as she threw her arms around his waist in an almighty hug. Tom looked completely stunned but recovered quickly and gave her a quick kiss on the head.

“I may or may not have to make this for breakfast more often” he chuckled “not sure of the outcome though!”

            We sat down at the table to eat and hen Lizzie had to endure a chorus of ‘Happy Birthday’ before she was allowed to open her presents that were all sitting on the table. As I predicted she loved the bracelet and put it on straight away, there were also gifts of music and book vouchers from Tom’s family which was really thoughtful. When all the cards had been opened Tom spoke again.

“My present is later” he said “now we need to go and get dressed. The dress code for today is smart casual and comfy”

Lizzie looked at him perplexed but went off to her room to pick an appropriate outfit. Tom and I cleared the dishes away and then went and changed ourselves. Knowing what the plan was for the rest of the day Tom and I opted for more smart than comfy. He wore a white button down shirt with dress trousers and shoes, and he tucked a tie into a jacket pocket to take with him. I wore a new dress, dark green, which ended just below my knee with a full skirt that showed off my lower legs beautifully, and I teamed it with a black linen jacket. Lizzie, however, not knowing the plans decided smart jeans and a band T-shirt was the order of the day. Tom and I exchanged glances as we took in her appearance. I made discrete soothing motions to him and he seemed to understand that I already had a plan to make her look presentable for the evening ahead.


	30. Chapter 30

Ch. 30

            It was time to go and we all piled into a car I had hired for the two days, Lizzie still having no idea what was going on. Tom drove, however, because I didn’t know the location and he did. The studio was just a nondescript building from the outside; Lizzie followed Tom into the building and stopped dead. In the foyer were Emma, Benedict, Abbie, Leah and Shannon. You couldn’t hear anything over the excited squeals from the girls. Tom and I went to greet Benedict to let the girls say hello and generally stop bouncing. Tom didn’t seem that surprised to see Ben, although I admit I was.

“Hello Ben” I said “what are you doing here?”

Ben looked beyond me to where Tom had been dragged by Lizzie to be properly introduced to The Roses and shrugged “moral support?” he offered

“Tom invited you.” I guessed

“Yep” he confirmed

I looked over again at Tom who seemed totally at ease with the four girls and wondered why he might need moral support. I took Ben over to meet the girls formally and said hello to Emma “All set?” I asked

“Yes” she said “The girls all have their stuff for tonight with them so it’s just their bits in the boot of my car to get to yours and then the cake to the restaurant”

“Brilliant” I said “we’ll let them get settled in the studio and then go and do the running around, if that’s OK?”

            Just then there was an extra loud squeal from Lizzie and I realised that she’d just worked out why we were there. At that moment a door opened and a sound technician appeared. He introduced himself as Mike and invited everyone to follow him. We all trooped behind him as he led the way to the studio Tom had booked. The girls were directed into the studio proper and Ben, Emma, Tom and I were found seats in the gallery. Tom looked fondly at the girls through the window and then over at me.

“Go on” he said “admit it, this was a brilliant idea!”

“OK fine” I huffed “it’s really good” I also looked through the window and saw Lizzie, Leah, Abbie and Shannon chattering animatedly as they discussed what they were going to do. There were a couple of technicians in there to help them understand the processes involved but basically they were there to make a CD, not a proper album obviously but just four or five tracks so they got a feel for what it was really like to record an album should they ever want to. They did a couple of scales for volume and balance and then Lizzie stopped looking very worried. Mike pressed the intercom switch

“Hey Thorne” he said, using her stage name “what’s the problem?”

“We haven’t rehearsed anything together” she said in a small voice

“No problem” replied Mike “we’ll just run straight through a few songs you like to play, listen back and pick the best five or so to polish. It’ll be great”

“OK” she shrugged and quickly sorted out a running order with the girls. Mike counted them down and they were off. They soon settled into their stride and two songs in were playing and performing really well together. It was time to leave them to it. I turned to Tom and gave him a quick peck on the cheek

“See you soon” I said “I’m just off with Emma to sort out a few things”

“OK” he replied “drive carefully” and with that we disappeared

            I followed Emma in her car to Tom’s knowing that I would never have managed on my own. We picked up Lizzie’s smart clothes and the cake and dropped off the girl’s stuff that wasn’t needed for the evening. It made a rather large pile in the corner of the living room and I wondered just what they had brought with them. When we were all sorted I grabbed the cake, we both jumped into Emma’s car so that mine would not be stranded in the middle of London by the end of the night, and headed to the restaurant that had been booked. I’d never been there before but it seemed a good choice, not so upmarket that the girls would feel intimidated but not too downmarket that it would still be a very special occasion. The head waiter took charge of the cake and promised it would be well looked after. He showed us the private dining room for that evening ensuring Ben and Tom a bit of privacy considering they would be out with four teenagers and not many people seemed to realise that Tom had a girlfriend for which I was grateful.   

            Cake safely delivered we headed back to the studio to see how the girls were getting on. They seemed to be doing really well. Tom and Ben explained that they had picked the tracks they were going to record and were already about halfway through the process. Seemingly Thorne in The Roses were naturals at the recording process not much had needed tweaking at all and they were practically recording in one take. Mike seemed very impressed considering the age of the girls.

“You know” he said conversationally “these girls could have a great future. I’ve worked with many prospective recording artists and not many of them come in here so polished and professional. Are you sure they’ve never been in a studio before?”

All eyes turned to me as I answered “No, never, this is their first time”

“Well they’re exceptional; do they write their own stuff?" Mike enquired

“A little” I shrugged “it’s been harder for them to get together recently with us shuttling backwards and forwards to London” I glanced over at Tom “though I wouldn’t have missed it for the world”

Just then the current song finished and Mike was quickly pressing buttons and sliding sliders. He toggled the intercom for the studio. “That was brilliant girls; we’ve got time for three of four more if you want?”

“Yes please” chorused the girls and a quick discussion followed about what extra songs they were going to do.

            To my surprise they started playing ‘Eternal Flame’ the first song they had played at our ‘home’ engagement party. Immediately Tom stood up and came over to where I was sitting, pulling me up and enveloping me in a warm hug. He didn’t let go however and just started swaying on the spot in time to the music. There was no room to dance properly in the gallery but he seemed determined to do his best. It was impossible not to sway with him as we were in such close proximity.

“I love you, you know” he leant down slightly to whisper in my ear

“I know” I replied “I love you too” and we exchanged gentle kisses until giggling from the studio told us we’d slightly interrupted the flow. That was the only song they had to do again from the top so there were not many complaints. Songs all recorded we were shown to the hospitality suite whilst we waited for the CD’s to be produced. As part of the package the girls got ten CD’s between them and they were chattering excitedly about who was going to be gifted a copy. Before long Mike arrived with the CD’s and I got a shock when I saw them, evidently someone had taken a picture of Thorne in The Roses and had turned it into the CD cover, Lizzie’s personal copy even had Happy Birthday written on it. We all thanked Mike for his help and he led us through the building back to the foyer. As we passed the Ladies cloakroom I requested a pause in the proceedings and ushered the girls inside to change for the evening. Before long there were four beautiful young ladies in front of us instead of the casual girls of just a few minutes ago. Tom, Ben and Mike were generous in their compliments and we carried on down to the foyer. Saying goodbye to Mike we stepped onto the pavement to be greeted by Jeff holding open the door of a stretch limo. He introduced himself to The Roses as they all clambered into the body of the car in great excitement. Tom, Ben and I followed them in after saying goodbye and thank you to Emma for all her help in the last two days.


	31. Chapter 31

Ch. 31

            The inside of the limo was everything I’d expected. Long bench seats along the sides of the car with a shorter one across the back as normal. There was an entertainment system and fairy lights in the shape of butterflies. There was also a small fridge full of soft drinks and a few snacks. Tom and I sat on the back seat with Ben and Lizzie to our right and the other girls close by. Tom draped his arm around my shoulders and pulled me close to tuck me under his arm. I snuggled in, content to watch the girls exploring the back of the limo. Jeff’s voice came over the intercom inviting the girls to the front of the large cabin space. Ben, Tom and I stayed put as Jeff wound down the front windows and proceeded to give the girls a comprehensive sightseeing tour of London. We had time before our reservation so it was a really good idea. The girls ended up leaning out of the windows to get a better view and were absolutely staggered when we went down The Mall towards Buckingham Palace, a view they’d only seen on the telly before. A loop around the back of the Palace gardens and we were heading back up The Mall towards Trafalgar Square and then down Whitehall towards the Houses of Parliament, over Westminster Bridge and past The London Eye. A long loop took us up the River Thames towards HMS Belfast, Tower Bridge and the Tower of London and then back into the city. The major sights seen, including The Globe Theatre, which Tom stared at wistfully, we headed towards the restaurant for the birthday meal.

            When we arrived at the restaurant Jeff got out opening the door for us. Tom and Ben jumped out first and Tom, as always, turned back to the car and extended his hand to assist me out. Since I’d met him, if he was with me in the car, I’d never opened the door for myself. At the start he was just too quick but I soon realised it was just him being the perfect gentleman and now I just waited for him to do it.

            The Roses had never been treated quite like this so Ben was next, extending his hand for Lizzie, she took it gracefully and got out too. Tom and Ben then took it in turns to assist The Roses out one by one and in no time we were all on the pavement, the girls with grins wide enough to split their heads open. Ben held out an arm each to Lizzie and Abbie and Tom, with an apologetic look at me, extended his arms to Leah and Shannon. They all got the hint and with much giggling we entered the restaurant and were led to the private room set aside for us. The girls got the hang of chivalry surprisingly quickly and stood patiently waiting for Tom or Ben to pull their chair out so they could sit down, seeing as there were only two gentlemen and five ladies. Each of the girls sat next to either Tom or Ben and were obviously having a marvellous time. Tom kept shooting me small apologetic looks which were very sweet but totally unnecessary. I totally understood that Tom and Ben were trying to make sure that the girls had a night to remember. I mean it’s not every day they would get to hang out with Hollywood ‘A’ listers, unless you are going out with one that is (or are her daughter!).

The conversation flowed easily; the girls were huge fans of Marvel and Sherlock and asked some very intelligent questions about filming practices and the less than obvious differences between filming a movie and a television series. Tom and Ben answered as well as they could not giving away any spoilers and also managed to ask the girls questions about what they thought they would do when they left full time education. The responses to that were quite surprising – they all wanted to go into the entertainment or music industry, the recording session hadn’t put them off anything; not that I thought it would.

Tom finally got round to asking the biggest question of the night. He made eye contact with each of the girls in turn and asked “Would Thorne in The Roses like to play at our wedding?”

There was a stunned silence and then the girls erupted into squeals of joy. They’d played at the ‘home’ engagement party of course but never at such an important event. Lizzie as designated spokesperson for the band looked at Tom and I and said “Of course we will! Just tell us when and where!”

Tom looked at her fondly “well seeing as you are the Bride’s daughter I expect you will be amongst the first to know!” he addressed them all again, looking stern for the first time that night “You must, however, promise here and now that once you know the date you will keep it secret until we are ready for the world to know”

There was a chorus of ‘No problems’ from the girls and then Tom smiled at them again, that big beaming smile all his fans know and love

“And now pudding!” he exclaimed and practically clapped his hands in excitement. The girls all giggled at the sight of his, frankly adorable, face and then Abbie spoke up.

“Tom and Jackie, we all just want you to know that we would never tell anyone the date of your wedding without your permission. Lizzie has told us how important your privacy is and we respect that. I mean it took her ages to even tell us you were dating and we’ve told no one.”

As I thought about what Abbie had said I realised that we hadn’t been ‘found out’ yet. We were engaged and still no one had cottoned on to the fact that Tom had a girlfriend let alone a fiancée, we were blessed I thought and just hoped that when the news did break the fans would look on me favourably as I was ‘one of them’ to start with.

            My musings were interrupted by the arrival of the cake. I’d made it in the shape of a microphone decorated with icing roses and the restaurant had added sparklers in the shape of a one and five to make fifteen. I’m not sure who looked happiest Lizzie or Tom! There was the obligatory chorus of ‘Happy Birthday’ and then Lizzie cut the cake and handed us all a slice. Once we’d finished eating the waiter came and cleared the table, reappearing soon after with the remains of the cake in its box. Tom, Ben and the waiter helped all of us girls up from the table and then it was time to leave. I never saw the bill paid so I assumed that it had been sorted when the meal was booked, but I didn’t like to ask. Tom and Ben swapped ‘partners’ for the short walk back to the limo and Jeff, as ever, was there waiting for us.

“Home, Mr Hiddleston?” Jeff asked as we got into the car. Tom grimaced at the formal tone and the girls giggled again.

“Yes please Jeff” he replied and we set off. The journey home was uneventful, the girls chattered amongst themselves and Tom and Ben talked a bit of ‘shop’. I was content to sit next to Tom and let all the conversations wash over me. Tom held my hand on his lap and it felt perfect. I couldn’t believe how lucky I’d been. There would always be moments when I’d question what I’d let myself in for but with Tom by my side I was sure I could cope with anything now.


	32. Chapter 32

Ch. 32

            We dropped Ben at his place first and he bade farewell to all the girls with a quick peck on the cheek each. His parting shot to Tom was a bit odd though, I’m sure Ben said ‘see you later’ but we were going back to Tom’s for the night and I was definitely wasn’t planning on going out again. Ben lived a short ride from Tom so in no time at all we were outside Tom’s building. The Roses were nearly beside themselves with excitement. I wasn’t sure what they were expecting to see but I was willing to bet they’d be surprised. Tom didn’t let go of my hand once on the way up. The lift was a little crowded with six of us in there but we managed.

            The pressure of Tom’s grip steadily increased on my hand the closer we got to his front door and I was reminded of how my hand had tightened on his the day we went to lunch at his Mum’s just after we’d gotten engaged. I kept glancing at him but his face betrayed nothing, however I was convinced there was something badly amiss. As soon as we were inside his front door the girls started organising their sleeping arrangements. Apparently beds were not an option as quilts and pillows were collected from Lizzie’s room and added to the pile of sleeping bags and blankets that Emma and I had dropped off earlier. Tom had retreated to his room and shut the door. It was most unlike him to be so rude so I decided to find out what was troubling him.

            I knocked gently on the door but there was no answer. Not wishing to attract the attention of the girls I gently pushed open the door and slipped into the room, closing the door firmly behind me. Tom was sitting on the far side of the bed, staring into space.

“Tom” I called softly, no response. I tried again a little louder, still no response.

“Thomas William Hiddleston what’s wrong?” I hissed as I walked round the bed towards him. He jumped guiltily at the sound of his full name. I’d never used it before, I don’t think I’d ever even called him Thomas, it was always Tom. He turned to look at me as I approached and the look on his face nearly broke my heart, he looked so worried and scared that I thought that something major had gone wrong. I put my hand on his thigh as I sat down.

“Love, what’s wrong?” I asked again.

“I can’t stay here tonight” he managed to get out between shaky breathes in a quiet voice.

“Why ever not?” I asked, keeping my voice low as he was.

“The girls” he said gesturing towards the living room.

“What about them?” I said, desperately trying to understand what was bothering him so.

“They might see me…” he hesitated before continuing “inappropriately dressed”

“You knew they were staying” I pointed out “It was your idea”

“I know” he said sadly “I thought I’d be OK, but I’m not”

I moved my hand from his thigh to around his shoulders and gave him a big hug “What do you want to do?” I asked

“Go to Ben’s” he said quietly, not looking at me “I’ve already asked him”

“OK” I said slowly “and what do we tell the girls? As I see it you‘ve only got two choices, the truth or a white lie”

He looked at me shocked “I can’t lie!”

“The truth then” I said simply

“No. I’ll think of something” he said

“OK, but think quickly, they’re going to wonder where we are soon”

“I know” he moaned “why ever did I think this was a good idea?”

“It’s actually all part of being a parent” I said gently “sleepovers come with the territory you know? Though maybe three was too many to start with”

He looked at me still shocked “But they’re fans” he spluttered

“Yes, they are” I agreed “They’re Lizzie’s friends, of course they’re fans, but right now they are your guests to celebrate your not quite stepdaughter’s birthday. You are not allowed to mess this up” I said sternly “You are a brilliant actor now prove it. The only thing you can do at this point and not look weak is lie, tell them, convince them that Ben needs you tonight and promise them something special in the morning as an apology; and while you’re at it I want your shirt!”

He looked at me with new intent, my words must have struck home “Why do you want my shirt?” he asked even as he started to undo the buttons.

“Simple” I replied “you’ve been wearing it all day and as I’m not going to get to sleep with you tonight in your bed I want something that smells of you instead!”

He turned towards me and gave me a loving look “I love you so much” he said simply as he handed me his shirt “You really are good for me and I am never going to let you go, however hard the road ahead may be” He stood up looking purposeful for the first time since the journey in the lift, held my head in both of his hands and kissed me deeply. When he broke the kiss he grabbed a T-shirt, swiftly changed into jeans and got a small overnight bag out of the wardrobe. Straightening up he took a couple of steadying breathes, he nodded to me and I opened the door and slipped out into the main room. The girls were all in their nightclothes and settled in their nest of sleeping bags and blankets. I reached back to knock once on the bedroom door to signal Tom that everyone was decently dressed and he emerged from his temporary refuge.

“I’m sorry girls” he said without preamble “I have to go out. Ben needs me to run lines with him for a project tomorrow, so I’m staying over his tonight now. Jackie will phone me when you are all up and dressed tomorrow and I’ll bring something nice for breakfast”

            The girls made noises of sympathy and said they hoped Ben wouldn’t keep him up too long. Tom managed a genuine smile at that and told them they could watch whatever they wanted from his DVD collection. They thanked him and started discussing what to watch. We left them to it and I walked Tom to the lift.

“You did really well” I said “I almost believed you!”

He pulled me into a proper ‘Hiddles Hug’ “I meant what I said in the bedroom” he said “I love you so much”

“I love you too” I replied “now go, or else it’ll be too late for Ben” he kissed me again and left “Text me when you get there” I said “and call me if you need to talk”

“I will” he said, the doors shut and he was gone.

            As I walked the short distance back to the apartment I wondered about what had just happened, not the declaration of love, that was a given, but seeing Tom’s vulnerable side, a side I didn’t even know existed and I was sure many of his fans didn’t either. He always appeared so confident and in control it was a real shock to see him falter like that. I resolved then and there that there was no way I’d hold it against him and I would help him through it any time it happened, if he’d let me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope you like this chapter, it took me nearly a whole week to get Tom out of his bedroom! I'm glad he came to his senses in the end. Please comment if you want. I promise I will answer them all and I do not bite, honest. See you all next week Roo


	33. Chapter 33

Ch.33

            I let myself back into Tom’s and checked on the girls, they had a pile of DVDs in front of them all of which starred Tom, even The Pirate Fairy was there and I smiled to myself. I grabbed my iPod from the side and told the girls I was off to bed. I had no intention of staying up and ruining their fun I just asked them to respect the neighbours and keep the noise down, there were drinks in the fridge and snacks on the side so I knew they would be fine.

Going into Tom’s room I quickly got dressed for bed in a pair of short pyjama bottoms and Tom’s shirt of course. I snuggled under the covers with my phone and iPod just as I received Tom’s text telling me he’d arrived at Ben’s safely. I tapped out a quick response and turned to my iPod. I knew just what I wanted to listen to, my favourite audio book, The Scarlet Necklace, read by Tom, of course. After about half an hour Tom rang me.

“Hi” I said quietly, not wanting the girls to hear me talking “are you OK now?

“Better, thanks” he replied “so sorry about earlier”

“Its fine” I responded “probably for the best, I’m pretty sure it’s wall to wall Tom Hiddleston on the telly tonight”

He groaned “Really?”

“Yep, even The Pirate Fairy is getting an outing” I teased

“And you’re not out there with them?” he asked, a smile finally in his voice

“Oh no, I’ve got something much better planned” I retorted. I could practically see him raise an eyebrow

“Oh really? What could be better than ‘wall to wall Tom Hiddleston on the telly’? He asked

“Well right now I’m talking to my insanely gorgeous fiancé on the phone, and when we finally hang up I’m going to have a bedtime story read to me” I countered

“Who’s going to read you a bedtime story?” he asked puzzled

“Oh, it’s an audio book, read by an up and coming actor, he’s quite good, does all the voices. He could go far if he plays his cards right!” it was impossible to keep the smile out of my voice as I teased Tom.

“This book wouldn’t happen to be about Revolutionary France and garnet necklaces?” he asked

“You guessed it!” I pouted “seriously though, I love you reading this, the accents are brilliant. We may have to get a copy of the book so that I can have the full unabridged version!”

“You’re impossible!” he laughed down the phone and I smiled to myself. Job done, I’d cheered him up.

“Are you going to sleep now?” I asked gently

“Yes. I think so” said Tom “better get as much as I can now if you are going to start expecting bed time stories until you drop off!”

I giggled “well goodnight then insanely gorgeous fiancé. I’m off to France with Yann Margoza! I’ll ring you in the morning when the girls are up and decent.” and I blew a kiss down the phone

“Goodnight Darling and thank you for helping me sort my head out” he responded “I’ll save all my kisses until tomorrow. Speak to you soon” and he rang off. I put my iPod back on but it wasn’t long before I’d drifted off, lulled by the magical quality of Tom’s voice reading a brilliant story.

The girls weren’t up too early in the morning. In fact I was wondering what time the last of them had given up the fight against sleep, I was fairly sure it was the early hours of the morning when I’d last heard the Marvel theme tune. I got up, dressed quickly and poked my head around the bedroom door into the living room to assess the state of the place. Surprisingly it wasn’t too bad; Abbie and Lizzie were dressed and tidying away sleeping stuff whilst Leah and Shannon were still trying to focus on moving. I checked the time, it was about 9am.

“Come on girls” I said determined to get them moving “The longer you take the longer it’s going to be before breakfast gets here because I’m not phoning Tom until you’re all dressed and decent!” That seemed to do the trick and there was a sudden flurry of activity. I waited until they were all dressed and packing away before I rang Tom, he picked up almost straight away.

“Good morning Darling” he said cheerily down the phone sounding in much better spirits than he had last night “are the girls up and moving?”

“Morning Love” I responded “yes they are all up and dressed and you’ll be pleased to hear your home has survived the night!”

“That is good news” he chuckled “give me fifteen to twenty minutes and I’ll be home, I was just waiting for your call”

“OK” I said “see you in a bit” and we rang off. I told the girls the timescale and to be fair to them the room was fully tidied away by the time we heard Tom’s key in the lock. I stood up to greet him and was met with the sight of him struggling through his own front door laden with cake boxes and bags of goodies, he even had a stick of French bread tucked under one arm! “Tom!” I exclaimed “there are only six of us!”

“I know” he countered “but you gave me the idea last night and I didn’t know what the girls would like and so I may have gotten a bit carried away!”

“I’ll say!” I stopped, puzzled “what do you mean I gave you the idea?”

He smirked at me, “all your talk of Revolutionary France and Yann Margoza last night made me decide we’d have a proper continental breakfast today, so we have a French stick” and he nodded towards the bread under his arm “and various croissants, pastries and maybe some cakes for later on” he winked at me.

“Mmm” I hummed appreciatively “later sounds good already!”

   Tom made his way to the kitchen to deposit the goodies, and then he started rummaging in the cupboards. “I know I’ve got some in here somewhere” he muttered to himself. “Aha, found them” and from the back of a cupboard he pulled a set of French coffee bowls. “Can you ask the girls if they would prefer hot chocolate or coffee please?” Tom asked me as he busied himself, heating the milk and searching for the other ingredients. Upon being asked the girls decided that hot chocolate this early in the morning was too good an opportunity to miss and so opted for that. I went to tell Tom and also asked for coffee for myself. I stopped in shock in the doorway to the kitchen; it resembled an explosion in a proper French patisserie with cakes, croissants, and bread everywhere. I hurriedly gave Tom the girl’s requests and helped him sort out the pastries whilst the milk heated on the stove top. We finally got the baked goods in some semblance of order and I took them to the table. The girls, unsurprisingly, were amazed to see the variety on offer and had soon helped me set the table.

Tom them emerged from the kitchen carrying a large tray with six steaming bowls on it and proceeded to hand everyone their hot chocolate, keeping the coffee back for me. The girls had never been served drinks in a bowl before and were impressed when they realised that the little handles made it a lot easier to drink from them. Breakfast was soon devoured and the leftovers bagged up for The Roses to sustain them on their journey back to Wiltshire, all except the cakes of course, I made sure we kept them


	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dedicated to Tom and Chris from Kokand, Congratulations you guys and best wishes for the future Love from Roo :D

Ch. 34

 

   The train wasn’t until early afternoon and so we wondered what to do. It was decided that we should put the efforts of the previous days recording session on for a proper play through, so we did. It sounded really good and showcased the girl’s talents beautifully. We all sat on the large corner sofa listening to it, heads nodding and feet tapping to the beat. Inevitably Eternal Flame came on and to my surprise Tom jumped up from his seat and offered me his hand. I had an inkling of what was going to happen but I was still slightly shocked when Tom started twirling me sedately around the furniture.

“What happened to the shy guy from last night?” I whispered in his ear

“Shh Darling I’m acting” came the quiet response.

“Well at least you’re acting like Tom!” I commented as we made our slow way around the room. Tom really did seem oblivious to the fact that we had four teenage girls gawping at us as if we’d suddenly sprouted an extra head each. He dipped me as the song finished and pulled me all the way up for a kiss as the last note played.

“I sense a pattern Tom” I said as he finally released my lips

“Do you Darling?” he said, trying to look innocent.

“Yes I do” I mused “You, me, Eternal Flame and you just have to dance!”

“Well it comes with so many happy memories” he said sincerely.

All too soon it was time to go so that the girls could catch the train. Tom put on an old baggy hoodie in an attempt to look less like himself and we all grabbed bags and luggage and headed downstairs where Jeff was waiting for us with the larger town car as we needed to fit six people in. The luggage was unceremoniously bundled into the boot and we all piled in to the body of the car. The journey to Paddington Station was quiet, no one really wanted to go home, but it was the school holidays so plans were made for a couple of girls days in the not too distant future. Tom and I had decided to split the school holidays between Wiltshire and London. When the school holidays were over, of course, we would be Wiltshire based as Lizzie still had school, she would be starting her G.C.S.E. year and there was no way she was moving school. Also Tom would be away from the end of the month until Christmas at the earliest so it made sense for us to be nearest out best support network.

At the station we quickly found the right platform and only had to wait a short while before the train turned up. Tom had done a good job of being inconspicuous and no one approached us all the time we were in the station. We found the girls their reserved seats and settled them in quickly, making sure they had the left over pastries from breakfast. Tom, Lizzie, and I hopped off the train and waved as it pulled out. We made our way back to Jeff then, not wanting to stay in public any longer than necessary. On the way back to Tom’s Lizzie thanked us profusely for her birthday. She had really enjoyed herself and I was pleased that she had had a proper birthday, so different from the last two.

The rest of the week was spent pottering around Tom’s flat and the local area. Tom and Lizzie practiced the guitar as often as they could and Tom was improving every day. He could already play a bit but he had to be able to play much better if he was to convince in ‘I Saw the Light’. It wasn’t long to go before he was off to Louisiana to prepare for filming but I was confident that he’d nail the part when he had to. At the end of Lizzie’s birthday week we packed our bags and headed for Wiltshire. We were due to visit Eddington Court on the Wednesday so it made sense to go to the cottage for a couple of weeks just to chill before Tom left.

The journey home was a complete disaster! There was a big accident on the motorway and we were stuck in traffic unable to go anywhere for two hours. Consequently when we got back to the cottage it was too late to cook anything, so Tom volunteered to go and pick up a Chinese take-away. It wasn’t something we did very often as I preferred to cook but it had happened often enough that we all knew each other’s favourite dishes so I was happy to let Tom go and fetch the food whilst I put our clothes away and sorted the laundry.

 


	35. Chapter 35

Ch. 35

Tom was back fairly quickly and I noticed in passing that the take away boxes were of a different design, but assumed that our usual take away had just changed box supplier. Tom had bought me my favourite, chicken in orange sauce with egg fried rice, and we plated up and ate with gusto, hungry after our delayed journey with no extra refreshment. It was really tasty though I noticed that my orange sauce looked different and it definitely tasted more ‘orangey’ than usual. I soon found out why.

About twenty minutes after we’d finished eating and were relaxing on the sofa, I was hit out of the blue by a blinding headache. The pain was so intense I grimaced, scrunching up the left side of my face. Lizzie, who was sitting on my left, noticed straight away but didn’t say anything. The pain receded for a short while but was soon back with vengeance. It felt like someone was stabbing me in my left temple and twisting the knife just to make sure I felt it! Lizzie knew that there was something wrong but Tom, who was sitting on my right was engrossed in a script and hadn’t noticed anything amiss. That was until I opened my mouth to reassure Lizzie that I was fine and realised that I really wasn’t. I leapt up from the sofa and raced to the bathroom, making it to the toilet just in time to empty the contents of my stomach into it. As I hung over the bowl, head pounding and stomach heaving I could hear footsteps hurrying to the bathroom.

I had made my way to the bathroom and found the toilet in the dark, I knew I had a migraine coming on and light was the last thing I needed at that point. Unfortunately Tom didn’t know what was wrong with me and pulled the light cord as soon as he was in the room. He was swiftly to my side, one large hand on my back rubbing it tenderly. I grasped his trouser leg in my fist and said hoarsely

“Tom. I need the light off!”

His hand stopped rubbing briefly “Why?” he said, but before I could answer another wave of nausea hit me. Lizzie who had followed closely behind Tom yanked the light cord and the room darkened again. I opened my eyes cautiously but did not move from my position on the floor as Lizzie explained what was happening to Tom.

“Mum suffers from migraines” she told him they’re brought on by oranges but I’ve never seen her this bad before”

“Oranges?” Tom repeated “but I’ve seen her eat Chicken in Orange Sauce before, and drink orange squash – so why is she bad now?”

“I don’t know” said Lizzie truthfully “that meal isn’t normally a problem” A thought must have struck her “Which take-away did you go to?”

“The new one in town” Tom answered as his hand stilled again on my back. His voice got a bit smaller as he added “It looked nice so I thought we’d give it a go. I didn’t realise that it might be a problem”

“I’ll go and ring them” said Lizzie, taking charge “and see if I can find the cause, you stay with mum please.” And she went off downstairs again.

I patted Tom’s leg, partly to gain his attention and partly to let him know I was ok-ish. He bent closer towards me. “I’m so sorry Darling” he said softly, his face full of remorse.

“It’s ok Love” I managed, though my throat hurt badly. “You didn’t know” I even managed a small smile in his direction. Just then another wave of pain pulsed in my head and the smile changed into a full on grimace. Tom looked at me full of concern and continued to rub my back. The nausea had passed and I carefully adjusted my position so that I was sitting, not kneeling on the floor.

            Lizzie came back at that point and confirmed what I’d already suspected. The restaurant had used pure orange juice to make the sauce for my chicken. I groaned because I knew exactly what that meant. A three day migraine!

“I need to go to bed” I managed to whisper.

Tom helped me to my feet and gave me a hand to wash my face and brush my teeth. The headache and nausea combined had left me exhausted so he had to help me to the bedroom as well. I kept my eyes tightly shut and I could feel one of Tom’s hands trying to shield my eyes as much as possible. We made it to our bedroom without incident. Lizzie turned one of the bedside lights on low and I gave silent thanks for dimmer switches. She then went to get me some of my migraine tablets and a glass of water. Tom helped me undress, got me into my pyjamas, and got me into bed. I felt so weak it was embarrassing. Lizzie soon reappeared with my medicine and I took the tablets gratefully. I whispered thanks to both of them, lay down and closed my eyes. I knew from experience that the best thing for me to do was sleep. To my surprise I felt the bed dip behind me. I turned over in bed and opened one eye a little bit. Tom was sitting against the headboard adjusting the pillows to give him support.

“What are you doing?” I asked

“Keeping you company” he said as if it was the most natural thing in the world

“Shouldn’t you be reading that script?” I countered

“Hmm I suppose I should be really. I would really like to play this part” He thought for a moment “How about I stay with you until you go to sleep, in case you’re sick again and when you’ve dropped off I’ll go and catch up on my homework. I just want to make sure you’re going to be ok.”

I was in no state to argue with him and I supposed twenty minutes of not reading a script was neither here or there. “Don’t let Luke know you’ve been slacking off” I said sleepily as I shut my eye and got comfortable. The last thing I heard was Tom’s soft chuckle.


	36. Chapter 36

Ch. 36

            I woke up the next morning still feeling rotten. Although I hadn’t been sick again the pain in my head was still the same. I was glad I had nice dark curtains in the bedroom because I could see from the sunlight breaking through the chinks that it was late morning on a lovely summer’s day. I groaned as I realised that the headache had not abated during the night. I shut my eyes hoping to be able to sleep it off.

“Darling?” Tom’s voice was soft as he entered the bedroom “Are you awake? I thought I heard you just now.”

“Yes I’m awake, but I don’t feel any better”

“I’m sorry to hear that Darling” he said keeping his tone light and conversational. “Do you think it may be because you’re not taking your tablets properly?”

I opened both eyes briefly to stare at him in disbelief. Was he trying to tell me off?! “Pardon?!” I said with a snap to my voice.

“I read the directions on the packet when I made you a snack” he said and he held up the tray he was carrying. “It clearly states on the packaging that your migraine tablets are to be taken with food and the sufferer is to stay as hydrated as possible.” He paused and raised an eyebrow at me questioningly. “You took your tablets last night on an empty stomach and I know you haven’t drunk anything today. How do you expect to get better if you aren’t taking your medicine correctly? Now, come on, I’ve got you toast and fruit juice, you need to eat this now” and he came over and sat beside me on the bed.

“Tom” I whined “I’m not hungry. I just need to sleep it off, please?”

“No” he said, all trace of lightness gone from his voice. “You need to eat this, it’s not much, then you can take some more tablets and when you wake up again I promise you’ll feel better”

I tried to turn away from him. I wasn’t in the mood for the argument I knew was brewing slowly and one I stood no chance of winning. Tom was having none of it, a hand on my shoulder keeping me still as the other hand put the tray on the bedside table.

“This is not up for negotiation” he said firmly “I will not let you make yourself worse” and he fixed me with a firm stare. I looked down, unable to meet his eye. I felt ashamed that I’d made him cross, this was not the Tom I’d grown to know and love, this was a man who was determined to make me see sense. I swallowed carefully, realising how dry my throat was and felt a wave of shame and guilt wash over me. He was right and now I would have to back down without losing too much face which, of course, was not going to happen. I slowly raised my head to look at him and the concern I saw on his face broke my resolve.

“I’m sorry I’ve been such a brat” I whispered “I’m not used to having someone care for me like you do” I laughed quietly “It takes some getting used to”

“I’m sorry too Darling” he said as he pulled me up into his arms “I may have used an unfair advantage just now to get you to do what you need to” I looked at him baffled. “I was just acting cross, my love” he clarified “though I am still concerned. I’ve never seen anyone get so ill so quickly. It frightened me somewhat, and then I read the back of the packet and decided to try and scare you to sense. You have to understand that it’s not long until I go to America and it’s been a long time since I’ve gone anywhere knowing I’m leaving someone special behind. I need to know you will be ok when I’m not here” he stopped then, unsure if he’d overstepped some line in our relationship. I decided to let him off the hook a little bit.

“It’s OK Tom” I managed though the discussion had worn me out. “I’m not used to having anyone put me first. I put everyone else, well Lizzie mainly, first and then cope the best I can in the circumstances. You’re forgiven for tricking me”

“And you’re forgiven for being a brat” he responded. Then his face fell. “Your toast will be cold now” he explained “I’ll go and make some more, then you can eat and go back to sleep. OK?”

I nodded slightly “on one condition”

“What’s that?” he said warily

I gave a small smile “The next time you’re ill and I’m around I get to look after you!”

He smiled broadly “Deal” He got up, picked up the tray and disappeared downstairs. It seemed no time at all before he was back up with hot buttered toast. He helped me sit up, eat it and drink the apple juice. He then gave me my tablets with a glass of water. I took them gratefully, drank the whole glass of water to make a point and then scooted back down the bed to get some more rest. I woke briefly once more during the day and spied the glass of water left for me so I drank half and drifted off again.


	37. Chapter 37

            When I next woke it was dusk. I was really surprised I’d slept that long. I lay still in bed for a few minutes trying to decide if I felt well enough to venture downstairs when I heard footsteps on the landing. It was Tom, of course.

“Hello Sleepy, how are you feeling? He asked

“Sleepy” I replied with a small laugh

“Feel like eating?”

“No, not really, but I will, something light if you can?

“Well Lizzie and I have already eaten. We went shopping whilst you were asleep and brought plenty of supplies including the ingredients for my mum’s chicken soup, guaranteed to make you feel better. Fancy some?” He smiled encouragingly. I just looked at him in astonishment.

“What?” he frowned “I’m quite capable of looking after the girl who will be my stepdaughter you know.”

“I know” I replied weakly “But the shopping…..” I trailed off. Tom was giving me the same no nonsense look he’d had on earlier when we were having our ‘difference of opinion’.

“Fine” I huffed at him “and yes please to the soup” I smiled a small smile, my head was still throbbing and I was definitely due some tablets.

“Brilliant” he beamed happily “I’ll just go and warm it up for you”

He was back before long with the tray on which sat a bowl of delicious smelling soup, a couple of soft bread rolls and a large glass of squash. Lizzie followed, wanting to see me and we all sat on the bed and chatted about their day whilst I ate the soup and bread. It was a tasty as it smelt and I contemplated asking Diana for the recipe the next time I saw her. Tom handed me some more pills and I took them with the squash. Lizzie and Tom stayed with me until I’d drunk all of the squash and then left me to sleep again. I really hated migraines which was why I took great pains to ensure I didn’t get many.

When Tom came to bed that night he brought a glass of milk for me to take my last tablets of the day. He gave me an odd look for a short while before asking me if I needed to use the bathroom. I was glad he’d asked because I wanted to go and freshen up slightly and use the facilities but I was sure I wouldn’t make it on my own. Too much light still hurt my eyes so I relied on Tom to get me to and from the bathroom safely. He also helped me freshen up and clean my teeth but waited politely outside whilst I did the rest. When I was finished we went back to the bedroom and whilst Tom did his nightly ablutions I took my tablets and settled down again.

            I was surprised how much better I felt Tuesday morning, not up and about better but the headache was definitely not throbbing as much as I was expecting and I wasn’t quite as light sensitive. Tom was very pleased and managed not to say ‘I told you so’ when he brought me breakfast. I did stay the rest of the morning and a large chunk of the afternoon in bed, still with the curtains shut, but was able to come downstairs and re-join the human race in the evening. I still wasn’t eating much so I only had a snack whilst Tom and Lizzie prepared their evening meal. I joined them at the dining table for coffee though, my first for two days and it tasted like nectar.

“So is there anything else that gives you migraines?” asked Tom curiously

“No, just pure orange” I replied “it took me ages to figure it out, but now I know what I can or can’t eat I stick to that. Nothing, however delicious is worth a three day headache! And what about you?” I asked “is there anything food wise we should be aware of?”

“I don’t think so” he replied “ my only food issues come when I’m preparing for a role and then I generally have a nutritionist and a food plan to follow. I don’t get my I Saw the Light one until next month”

“OK” I said “just let us know what you need to do and we can accommodate you”

“Thanks” Tom said “I sometimes find it tiresome so it will be nice for me to have someone to motivate me” We moved to the sofa after Tom and Lizzie had eaten and tidied away. The three of us squeezed on one sofa, me snuggling up to Tom and Lizzie snuggling up to me. It was nice to feel close like a family again. I’d forgotten how good it was to have someone else to share stuff with, even the boring minutiae of life needs to be sifted through occasionally.

            Tom started talking about our trip to Eddington Court the following day. As we talked about basic wedding ideas we realised that we would have to sort out an awful lot the next day. In our excitement we’d forgotten that Tom would be away for the last part of the year so all major decisions would have to be made the next day – menus, wine, roughly how may guests, time plan, flowers and decorations to name just a few – there was so much we wouldn’t be able to remember it all. Lizzie abruptly got up off the sofa and went upstairs, she came back shortly with a blank notebook which she presented to us with a flourish. Tom grabbed a pen from beside his abandoned script and we started making lists and headings.

            The guest list was a major priority because I just didn’t know who Tom would want to invite. My side was fairly easy, just a few close friends and of course Lizzie’s band mates and their families. Tom’s side read like the cast list of one of the best films ever made! All the Avengers and their families, Ben and his girlfriend Sophie (who I still had to meet and was still a secret from the fans), Martin Freeman, his partner Amanda, and their children, Mark Gattiss, Hadley Fraser, Kenneth Branagh and his wife, Lindsey, all of Tom’s family and some non-showbiz friends. Most of them would need to be found accommodation for at least one night and I began to wonder how many rooms Eddington Court actually had.

“Have you given any thought to Bridesmaids?” Tom asked making a heading on a fresh page.

“A little” I admitted “Lizzie, obviously and maybe your Emma as Chief Bridesmaid. Do you think India would like to be a flower girl?”

“I’m sure she’d love to” Tom replied “I’ll ask Chris and Elsa first chance I get. I’ve also got a couple of young cousins I’d like to ask if that’s ok?”

“Yes, of course that’s fine” I answered “four bridesmaids and a flower girl sounds perfect” I decided to turn the tables on him slightly “And have you thought of a Best Man and ushers yet?”

Another page turned, another heading.

“Well I’d love Chris to be Best Man” Tom said. Lizzie and I smiled broadly at him.

“No surprises there” we chorused and Tom chuckled at us.

“For ushers I thought maybe Ben and Martin. I’m fairly sure they’d both say ‘yes’” he turned to me “have you thought of a colour scheme?” he asked me hesitantly.

“Kind of” I replied “but I’m not sure you’ll approve.” That right eyebrow of his raised, as always inviting me to expand on my statement. “Green and gold” I said quietly “I can’t wear white as it’s not my first marriage.”

“Green and gold” he repeated “no black Darling?”

“I was rather hoping you’d wear the black” I said sheepishly “it looked so lovely at our London engagement party and, you know if it wasn’t for a certain Norse God of Mischief we wouldn’t have met?”

Tom looked at me fondly “For you, my darling Jackie, anything. Except” and he waggled a single finger at me” I’m not wearing full costume!”

“Of course not Tom” I laughed out loud “that would be silly, gorgeous but silly.” We laughed together for a bit and then Tom sobered up slightly. He took one of my hands in both of his and he looked deep into my eyes “I meant what I said about the rest though. Anything you want is fine.”

“Thank you “I breathed “I won’t make any joint decisions without you though. I suspect there will be lots of emails whizzing to and fro in the next few months.” At that point we realised that we had realistically done all we could for the night. Tom closed up the notebook, put it safe and we retired to bed.


	38. Chapter 38

Ch. 38

            The next morning Tom was up bright and early as normal and took himself off for a run. I stayed in bed for a bit but was up by the time he got back. He had a quick shower and got changed into black dress trousers, a white dress shirt and a black waistcoat, the sleeves of the shirt were rolled up to his elbows and the neck was undone the usual two buttons. He looked drop dead gorgeous and I wondered how I would compete with that. I decided a dark blue and white maxi dress would fit the bill. It fitted me perfectly and showed off my best bits without being too overtly sexy. Tom whistled appreciatively as I entered the front room and I preened slightly. I still wasn’t used to dressing up quite so often and it always gave me a little thrill when somebody commented on how nice I looked. Lizzie had organised a band practice for the day but had written down a list of questions for us to ask at the venue. We went out to the Jag, Tom, as usual, opened the door for me and waited until I’d arranged my skirt before shutting it and going round to the driver’s side. He hopped in and we set off.

            Eddington Court was only half an hour away and it turned out the reason I recognised it vaguely on the website was that it had been used as a film set in a lot of period dramas that I had seen; although I never realised it was so close to home. It was actually a very exclusive spa hotel that was also licensed for weddings. The entrance was off a country lane and the start of the long driveway was flanked by a pair of impressive wrought iron gates. Tom drove down the sweeping tree lined driveway as I looked around, glimpsing the vistas of parkland through the gaps in the trees. I couldn’t wait to see the view from the house. As we rounded the last corner I gasped audibly and Tom chuckled at my reaction. The house was even more gorgeous in real life. The honey coloured stone looked beautiful in the summer sun. The lighter colour of the stone columns and mullioned windows contrasting perfectly. Tom put his hand on my knee “isn’t it heavenly Darling?” he murmured.

“Yes it is” I replied “can we really get married here?”

“I hope so” he replied “That’s what we’re here to find out” as he spoke he pulled into a parking space, hopped out to open the door for me and with an arm around each other’s waist we made our way through the imposing front door and towards the reception desk.

            As the receptionist noticed us Tom gave me the tiniest wink and slipped into that lovely welsh accent again. I managed to keep my composure as the receptionist finally realised who she was speaking to. Her eyes widened and she paled ever so slightly as Tom launched into the reason for our visit.

“I apologise unreservedly” he started “as you can tell I’m not William Thomas from Wales. I didn’t want you knowing who I was straight away for privacy reasons but the reason for our visit is the same.” The poor receptionist still looked          like a rabbit caught in headlights. Tom realised this and tried to put her at her ease. “Would you like to play a trick on your manager?” she nodded slightly “What door will she come through when you call her?” he asked. She pulled herself together and indicated a door. “So if Jackie and I stand over there” and he pointed to the information stand “You’ll have a prime position to see her face when I turn round” A small smile spread across her face, Tom smiled back at her. “Ring her now?” he suggested “and remember it’s William Thomas!” The receptionist nodded again, firmer this time and picked up the phone. Tom and I took position and waited. As expected the manageress came out of her office and walked towards us. I could see the receptionist out of the corner of my eye and she looked like she was about to burst.

“”Mr. Thomas?” said the manageress as she got close enough.

“Yes” said Tom turning around and giving her his best smile. I cast a quick glance at the receptionist and her smile was nearly as big as his as the manageress registered who exactly was standing in front of her. To give her her due she only broke composure for a couple of seconds but it was enough for the poor receptionist to suddenly make herself busy under the counter!

            The manageress introduced herself as Kathy and invited us into her office where she phoned for refreshments before starting the conversation. “So Mr. Hiddleston, what brings you to our hotel?”

“Oh, please call me Tom” said Tom immediately “It’s the same reason as ‘William Thomas’ gave really. Jackie and I are looking to get married at the end of February next year and this seems like the perfect place to do it. I know you can handle the security required as I’ve filmed here before and so have a lot of my friends. So can you tell me please if the date is free?”

Kathy got out a big desk diary and turned to February 2015. “The end of the month you said?” We nodded in unison.

“The very end, the 28th, if at all possible?” I said, speaking for the first time.

Kathy looked at the diary thoughtfully. “Well that whole week is free at the moment, from the 23rd onwards; we have nothing booked so far”

“Great” said Tom “We’ll take it please.”

“The whole week?” Kathy queried.

“Yes please” replied Tom “will that be a problem?”

“No, not at all” said an obviously shocked Kathy “Um, if you’ll excuse me for a moment I’ll just get our Wedding Planner to see you if that’s ok?”

“Thank you” said Tom smoothly “that would be most helpful.”


	39. Chapter 39

Ch. 39

            The Wedding Planner turned up very quickly and did a classic double take as she realised who was in the room. I let out a small giggle, amused by the reactions of these very professional ladies to the man in their midst. Tom, I’m sure was used to it but it was still a novelty for me. The Wedding Planner was introduced as Leanne and she seemed like a very capable woman. I liked her straight away which was good as she would be the one to make my dreams come true.

            When we explained to her that our remaining planning time together was severely limited owing to Tom’s imminent departure for the States she understood straight away. She took us on a tour of the hotel including the Bridal Suite of course, that was sumptuous with a large four poster bed complete with heavy curtains all decorated in rich reds and golds. The en-suite was beautiful too, boasting a large whirlpool bath and state of the art shower. We were also shown the rooms for the Bride and Groom for the Wedding Eve, they were at opposite ends of the hotel, to discourage any tradition breaking we supposed. Both rooms were beautifully decorated and had a double bed and plenty of floor space, essential for the Bride if she was going to be wearing a big dress. Leanne explained that the hotel could sleep about eighty people all told and had rooms that catered for all eventualities; cots could even be supplied for anyone that needed them.

After we’d toured the upstairs we were shown the downstairs. The Orangery was where the ceremony would take place. It was gorgeous, lovely wrought iron beams and a vast expanse of glass. If the weather was nice the view of the grounds would be stunning. The main ballroom was huge, as you would expect from a house of this period, it even had a minstrel’s gallery though I doubted we would need that. Leanne explained that the tables for the wedding breakfast would be at one end of the room, leaving the other end clear and that they would all be cleared to the sides of the room to create a large dance space after the meal was finished. We asked about the stage for Lizzie’s band and subsequent music and were shown that it would be under the minstrel’s gallery which we thought was very appropriate.

            The tour over we went back to Leanne’s office to discuss details. She suggested that because Tom was due to leave for the States quite soon, we sort out as much as possible that day and set up an email account we could all access that was purely for wedding related issues. We saw the wisdom of that and Tom said he’d set one up when we got home. Numbers of guests were then discussed and we realised that almost all of the guests that would need accommodation could stay at the hotel. We decided on an afternoon wedding as it gave everybody plenty of time to get ready without getting up at an ungodly hour to do so!

            As it was getting near lunch time Leanne suggested we try out the restaurant so we could taste the quality of the food. We readily agreed and a private dining room was quickly organised so as to keep out visit as secret as possible and we enjoyed a romantic meal for two. The food was delicious and we decided that a traditional English roast was the way to go, preferably turkey for the meat as it is my favourite. I left it to Tom to pick the desserts and the wine, the wine he found easy picking a nice red and white. The desserts he struggled to narrow down and so we decided on a small piece of everything he liked on one plate, sort of like a dessert appetiser plate. Lunch over we went back to Leanne’s office to hash out some more details. When we’d finally covered everything we could think of for the moment we thanked Leanne and Kathy and headed home. It had felt like a long day although it had been only a few hours, but we had been very productive.

            Once home in the cottage we came up with the definitive guest list over a leisurely cup of coffee. It wasn’t as difficult as I thought it would be from my point of view as I only had a few friends to invite. Tom, however had a much harder job as his social circle was much bigger than mine. When we included all the film stars as well we had close to 120 guests and no way to pare it down anymore, so we decided that we would just have to sort something out. I pointed out to Tom that the cottage would be empty for at least two nights so we could let people sleep there of need be and there was bound to be some more accommodation somewhere that we could book. I then set to browsing the internet for wedding stationery. I found a good company quite quickly and had a lovely time browsing through their designs. I settled on a pale gold cardstock and paper with metallic green decoration around the edges and plain black writing. The wording for the invite was a lot harder to sort, after some agonising over words we decided that as we (well Tom) were paying, the invite ought to be from us and that made it easier. We added the joint email address for people to reply to and sent off the order. The company promised delivery within a week which would give us some time in the days leading up to Tom’s departure to write and send at least some off.

            Tom also emailed the people who would have to clear their schedules and make travel plans. The one he sent to Sarah made him happiest of all I think. When we’d done as much as we could we went to bed but I couldn’t sleep. We’d set the date for our wedding, it was really going to happen and I was having trouble believing it! I looked at Tom, his face illuminated by a ray of moonlight, looking so relaxed and peaceful and wondered for the umpteenth time what I had done to deserve such a wonderful man. I was apprehensive about him going away filming but reasoned that it wouldn’t be too much different from the last two years, excepting of course, there would be calls and emails to look forward to. I finally relaxed enough to sleep and as I snuggled into Tom’s sleeping body his arms reflexively hugged me tight and held me close. That I would definitely miss I thought as I drifted off.


	40. Chapter 40

Ch.40

            The stationery company were as good as their word and the invites arrived within the week, they looked even better in real life than they had on the website. Tom and I had a writing session one day, just ploughing through names and addresses, determined to get it sorted before his departure. A trip to the Post Office, the next day for a huge amount of stamps and we were done. I’d done the Post Office myself so as not to attract attention to the fact that I was about the break goodness knows how many hearts.

As I drove home I realised that news of our engagement had yet to really hit. I was surprised because although we had kept our relationship really low key, we had gotten engaged in front of a whole factory workforce and it wasn’t exactly understated what with the horse and everything. I was in two minds whether it was a good or bad thing. On the one hand Lizzie was being kept out of the spotlight which I was pleased about but the wedding was only three months before her GCSE’s so it might be good for her to get used to all the attention before then. Also as a former fan-girl myself I appreciated that I would like to know if Tom had gotten engaged before the news of the wedding broke, or even that he was seeing somebody (but that boat had already sailed). I resolved to speak to Tom about it when I got home.

True to my thoughts I sat him down with a cup of tea each and voiced my concerns. He was very sweet about it all and listened carefully to what I had to say. A quick phone call to Luke and we’d arranged to meet the following Monday when we were back in London. I hated taking time out of our last week together before Tom left for four months but it had to be done.          

The next day we were due to head back to London, Tom’s flight was only seven days away and we had a fair bit to sort out first. Tom had discovered that Chris and Elsa Hemsworth and their children would be in London that weekend and had invited them all over to his for a meal so that he could ask Chris to be his Best Man, they were due Saturday evening so we had time to prepare.      

We set off fairly early Friday morning in two cars and before long it seemed that we were outside Tom’s apartment, which Lizzie and I were starting to think of as a second home. As soon as we’d dropped off our stuff Tom and I were back out again, we needed to pick up all his personal mail from his private mail box that he used so that only people he really wanted to know knew where he lived, and to pick up groceries for the meal the next day and for the rest of the week. Lizzie and I were only staying at Tom’s until he left and then we were Wiltshire bound again as Lizzie was due to start back at school at the end of the following week. I was seriously considering getting a pair of calendars to keep track of it all!

Post collected and groceries bought we headed home. I went straight to the kitchen to put away all the food and start preparing the pudding for the next evening. Tom had received his diet plan for I Saw the Light in the post and he had to lose quite a bit of weight, not that he had that much spare to lose anyway but the character he was playing was even thinner than him. Having realised the restrictions the diet placed on him Tom had decided that the meal with Chris and Elsa would be a sort of ‘last hurrah’ of all the things that he wouldn’t be able to eat whilst filming so he had requested my Mousse au Chocolat as dessert and a roast for the main course. The mousse was better if made well beforehand hence the time spent in the kitchen.

Once I’d finished we checked the joint email to find one from Sarah saying of course she and her family would be at the wedding and wishing us all the best, and one from Leanne with a list of florists and photographers that she recommended. Tom looked down the list of photographers and spotted a name he recognised from a friend’s wedding. He said the photos were very good, some formal and some candid and that she would be a good one to use. We made a note of her contact details in our wedding book and Tom said he’d contact her on Monday. Most of the florists were local to Eddington Court so I said I’d check them out once Tom had gone and I was back in Wiltshire and pick the one I thought would do the best. Tom seemed happy with that idea so we left it at that.

           Saturday was a busy day; Tom and I cleaned the apartment from top to bottom and moved some of the more delicate items he owned up a level or two, out of the way of inquisitive hands! India was rapidly approaching two and a half and we didn’t want any accidents. Flat cleaned I started on preparing the vegetable for that evening, I had no intention of spending more time in the kitchen that evening than I absolutely had to. We stopped for a welcome break at lunch time, just a quick sandwich really to tide us over. Chris, Elsa and the children were due at five pm and I was aiming to be eating at seven pm after checking with Chris that it would be OK, mindful of little people’s bed times.

            A few last minutes jobs and we went to get changed, whilst it wasn’t a formal meal out Tom and I had decided that sweats and a T-shirt really weren’t appropriate wear. He wore my favourite combination on him, black dress trousers, white button down shirt and a plain black waistcoat; open the shirt neck two buttons. I wore a royal blue jersey dress which hugged my curves and came to just below my knees. I made sure the joint went into the oven in plenty of time and we settled down to wait. Lizzie emerged from her bedroom at some point and I was pleased to see she’d made an effort with her clothes too, plain black trousers and an emerald green shirt, clearly showing which Norse brother she favoured.


	41. Chapter 41

            Bang on time the intercom buzzed and Tom jumped up to answer it. I started getting a bit nervous, I’d only met Chris a couple of times and I’d never met Elsa or the children before. I thought it was important that we got on well as our men still had at least one film left to do together, even though they wouldn’t start filming it for a long while. Ever the gracious host Tom had asked Chris if he needed a hand with anything but the Hemsworth’s seemed to have it all under control, though I’m not quite sure how. Managing two five month old babies and an excitable two and a quarter year old is a feat worthy of recognition, especially with all the paraphernalia babies need. Soon enough there was a knock at the door, we all stood up to welcome our guests, Tom and I on one side of the door and Lizzie on the other. As soon as the door was opened a little blur hurled itself at Tom!

“Unca Tom! Unca Tom!” it squealed and when Tom picked it up and swung it around it squealed even louder. I took a hasty step back to avoid being hit by flailing limbs. As the spinning slower down I stepped back towards Tom and the now stationary blur which resolved itself into a little girl, India of course, Tom leaned back from her to get a better look.

“India, my little princess” he said “my you’ve gotten bigger”

India nodded solemnly “My two now” she said proudly. She suddenly caught sight of me standing to one side. “Unca Tom, who dat?” she said pointing straight at me. I smiled at her and she hid her face in Tom’s neck. Tom looked over at me and smiled hugely.

“That, my little princess, is my queen, her name is Jackie and I’m going to marry her” India lifted her head from Tom’s neck to study me carefully, I smiled at her again and gave a little wave. I got the tiniest smile back and I figured it was a start.

“’Kay” she said and twisted in Tom’s arms to look at Chris and Elsa “Unca Tom got a queen” she announced.

“Indeed he has” replied Chris “and isn’t she lovely?” India nodded quickly and just like that everything was fine. Tom introduced me to Elsa and she greeted me like I was an old friend. Introductions to Lizzie came next; India took one look at her and squirmed in Tom’s arms until he had to let her go. She ran to Lizzie and demanded a pick up. Tom was flabbergasted as he put his arm around me, but not quite as flummoxed as Lizzie, she’d never held another child before but caught on quick. India was already chattering to her like she’d known her forever and Lizzie was looking bemused.

“’Izzie, we play! Was the last thing I heard as Lizzie was dragged away having put India down carefully on the floor.

            Tom and I then turned our attention to the two bundles of blankets in Chris and Elsa’s arms. “Tom, Jackie say hello to Tristan and Sasha” Chris said proudly as he handed a baby to Tom. “That’s Sasha, or is it Tristan?” he looked to Elsa for confirmation. She nodded “That’s Sasha. This...” she said handing me the other baby “is Tristan”

“Hello Tristan, lovely to meet you” I said softly. I looked over at Tom who was totally at ease with a baby in his arms and I found myself wondering what he’d be like if the baby in his arms was his own flesh and blood. That was way in the future though, if at all, for now I had dinner to check on. Elsa took Tristan off me and followed me into the kitchen “I’m sorry I missed your engagement parties” she said “Chris made them sound like great fun”

“They were” I said remembering that hectic weekend “all over too quickly though, still, planning a wedding now so that will keep me busy whilst Tom’s away.” I looked at the two men, Tom still holding Sasha like it was the most natural thing in the world. <One day> I thought to myself <that man is going to break the internet, he’s so adorable right now> Just then Sasha stated to fuss slightly and instead of handing him back to Chris Tom just calmed him down with a gentle bounce and rub on his back <Yep, the internet doesn’t stand a chance the day it hears of a Baby Hiddleston> I smiled to myself. I dragged my attention back to the meal I was meant to be cooking.

            Elsa stayed to chat and we were soon nattering away like old friends. In a moment of weakness I asked her how she coped when Chris was off filming somewhere. She told me it was difficult but not impossible, especially with the better means of communication these days. She also said the most important thing was to trust your partner, both of the guys were really famous now thanks to Thor and Loki and some fans didn’t respect boundaries Chris had been offered ‘a good time’ on more than one occasion, even though I was sure most of the fans knew he was married. It could be worse for Tom as our engagement was still not common knowledge.

“You won’t have to worry though” Elsa said kindly “Tom is so in love with you no other woman stands a chance” I looked at her in amazement “I’ve known Tom a long while now” she continued “and I’ve never seen him look as happy as he does now, he’s absolutely besotted with you, you are obviously good for him” I couldn’t believe she’d picked up on that from the short time she’d seen us together and from whatever Chris had said about me.

            Just then the boys approached the doorway, it was time for the twins to eat and Tom was determined to help. Elsa and I vacated the kitchen so that Chris could prepare the twin’s meal, Tom looking on with interest. Fruit puree and bottles ready we all sat on the sofa as Tom and Elsa tried to feed Sasha and Tristan. Elsa was obviously more accomplished than Tom although he did manage to get most of the fruit in Sasha’s mouth and not down his front! Whilst the babies were having their bottles Chris and I took scatter cushions and made a safe ‘nest’ for them on our bed. The twins were sleep by the end of their bottles so Tom and Elsa gently carried them to our bedroom and laid them in the ‘nest’. Covering them with a fleecy blanket Chris said “they should be good for a couple of hours now” and smiled fondly at them both. We retreated quietly and gathered again around the kitchen.


	42. Chapter 42

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good news, I'm posting early this week as tomorrow has suddenly become mega busy and I didn't want to disappoint all my loyal readers. Bad news it's quite a short chapter this week, sorry, hopefully normal service will be resumed next week

Ch. 42

            Now everybody’s hands were free Tom got out a bottle of wine and some glasses and poured everyone a drink, even me. Although I rarely drank I knew I preferred white wine to red so Tom had bought a nice bottle of both. The white was actually a dessert wine but I wasn’t a wine snob so didn’t mind that I was drinking it ‘with the wrong course’. Tom had also made my drink a spritzer by adding lemonade so it was a full glass but not much actual alcohol. I saw the confused look on Elsa’s face and took pity on her. “I don’t drink as a rule” I explained “only on very special occasions and then only a little bit. You guys carry on though, don’t mind me.”

            Dinner was very nearly ready so I shooed everyone to the table, Chris going to get India and Lizzie. India refused to be parted from her new best friend so seating was arranged accordingly, India, on her booster seat between Lizzie and Chris, Elsa on Lizzie’s other side, Tom next to Elsa and me between Tom and Chris. When we were all seated we began serving ourselves. India was being really funny she completely ignored Chris and focussed only on Lizzie, who had to cut her food into little bits for her and help her out when she struggled. From the look on Lizzie’s face she was thoroughly enjoying the experience, seeming to know instinctively what to do and even pre-empting some of the problems before they arose. Chris and Elsa looked on astounded.

“She never settles with somebody new this quickly” commented Elsa just as Chris said “Do you hire Lizzie out? She’d be brilliant” Lizzie blushed slightly at the compliments but didn’t answer.

            When everyone had eaten their fill Elsa and I cleared the table and I brought out the Mousse au Chocolat. Chris’ eyes widened with delight I didn’t know he liked chocolate that much and Tom? Well he was practically drooling but then he’d tasted it before. As I‘d suspected the mousse was a great hit, so much so that Elsa asked me for the recipe which I gladly gave her. Dessert over I made coffee and we all went to the sofa. Before India could rush off again, Tom sat her on his knee “Hey little princess” he said to her “do you want to help me marry my queen?”

India gave him a strange look “Unca Tom?” she said quietly, obviously not understanding.

Tom tried again “Do you want to wear a pretty dress, have flowers in your hair and be our flower girl?”

“Pretty dress! Pretty dress! “India responded

Tom looked at Chris and Elsa “is that a ‘Yes’” he asked. They chuckled and agreed that it was a yes. “Thank you India, you’ve made Jackie and me very happy” Tom said as he let India down, she went straight to Lizzie and dragged her off again...

            Tom then turned to Chris. I could see him plucking up the courage to ask the important question so I just put my hand gently on his knee. He took a deep breath and started to speak.

“Chris, my brother from another mother, would you be my Best Man? There’s no one I’d rather have, we’ve been friend for ages and you’re the only one I trust to keep me sane enough on the day”

Chris beamed a smile to rival Tom’s on a good day and said “I’d be honoured mate, thank you for asking”

“Thank you for saying ‘Yes’” Tom laughed and suddenly the pair of them were in the biggest man hug I’d ever seen. When they broke the hug Chris looked at me and said “Don’t worry Jackie, I’ll get him there on time and in one piece”

“You’d better Hems” I mock growled “you may play Thor but ‘trust my rage’ you do not want to see me angry if you fail”

The boys looked at me in shock

“You know” Tom commented “I’ve never seen Jackie angry”

“Sounds like you better keep it that way!” replied Chris.

“It does rather” Tom chuckled and pulled me in for a hug. “Don’t worry Darling, I’m sure nothing will spoil our big day” he crooned and kissed me on top of my head, his favourite place to kiss me in company.


	43. Chapter 43

            With me mollified we sat on the sofa again and the conversation predictably turned to the wedding. We talked about the venue and accommodation, the entertainment and food even outfits and the colour scheme. Chris came up with a really good question at one point.

“Tom, what are you going to do about your fans?”

Tom looked at him puzzled, eyebrow cocked in its usual manner.

“Oh come on” Chris continued “you know your fans always seem to know where you are and what you’re doing. What if they all descend on the venue en masse?”

“To be honest” Tom replied “I hadn’t given it any thought. I mean most of them don’t seem to have noticed we’ve gotten engaged yet, though how that’s happened I’m not really sure”

“They will though” countered Chris “and when they do…” he left the rest of the sentence hanging in the air. It didn’t need saying. A horde of girls trying to get a glimpse of the wedding was a horrible thought. Suddenly a picture flashed in my head, the Ballroom at Eddington Court full of people only it wasn’t our wedding I was seeing.

“I’ve got an idea” said tentatively. Everyone looked at me with interest

“Are you going to share?” asked Tom

“Well” I said, gathering my thoughts “We’ve got the hotel for the whole week, right?”

“Yes” agreed Tom

“How many autographs do you think you can sign in, say, three hours?

“What are you getting at” Chris chimed in, now as confused as Tom.

“Well, what if your fans could see you before the wedding? No give aways for colours or anything like that, but for your English fans this would be a golden opportunity, just think about it, if all the ‘star’ guests can get here bit early we could possibly hold a mini signing / meet and greet event. Charge £30 a ticket for the chance to meet the stars of The Avengers and Sherlock, all proceeds to UNICEF”

Tom and Chris looked at me in amazement, slow grins spreading over their faces.

“Darling, that’s inspired” Tom enthused “Do you think we’d need to let Marvel know?” he asked Chris.

“Don’t know” said Chris “if we told them why and the charity that would benefit I don’t see how they could complain.”

“If we held it on the Wednesday and Thursday evenings your younger fans wouldn’t have to skip school and we would still have the day before the wedding to ourselves” I said, thinking rapidly. “For your local fans it would be brilliant. London is a long way for us country types” I continued “I think your fans are well mannered enough to realised that if we do this then the rest of the time belongs to us and we may even get a stress free wedding”

“We can certainly talk to Luke about it on Monday” said Tom happily “Are you ok with this Chris?”

Chris nodded “As your Best Man I can hardly say ‘No’ but actually I think it’s a really good idea. I’m sure most of the others could be here for most of that time too.”

I giggled softly at the thought of major film productions having to stop for a week just because little old me was getting married!

Tom pulled me into a big sideways hug “Think of the donation we could give to UNICEF” he said happily “I love you so much, you’re perfect”

I scoffed at him “Am not, though I admit I do have the odd good idea”

            Lizzie came back in the room at that point to say that India was asleep on her bed so she’d covered her with her quilt. Elsa got up and checked on all of her children. The twins were still snuggled in their ‘nest’ and India was sound asleep on Lizzie’s bed. Seeing that they were all OK she settled back on the sofa next to Chris. We chatted for about another hour and then Chris and Elsa decided it was time to go. Lizzie and I collected all the children’s things and Tom made sure Chris had his invite, then Chris, Elsa, and Tom each took a sleeping child and we all went down to Chris’ car I made sure I had my keys before I shut the door behind me. We all made it downstairs in one piece and Chris, Elsa, and Tom carefully put the children in their car seats, miraculously all the children stayed slumbering. When all the bags were deposited in the car as well Chris gave Lizzie and I a kiss on the cheek whilst Elsa kissed Tom and then Elsa was kissing Lizzie and I whilst Tom and Chris had another man hug.

“Let us know what happens about the signing” said Chris “and Jackie, get our numbers off Tom anything you need to talk about Elsa and I will try to help as much as we can”

“Thank you Chris, and you Elsa, that really means a lot to me, to know I have someone to talk to who knows exactly what I’m going through” I responded.

“You’re welcome Jackie” said Elsa “you and Tom are obviously meant to be together, you are so good for him”

On hearing Elsa’s words Tom pulled me close and kissed the top of my head affectionately “She is very good for me and to me” he said happily “but we mustn’t keep you, we’ll be in touch” and with that we waved the Hemsworths off into the night. As we went back up in the lift we talked about the evening. Lizzie seems as taken with India as India was with Lizzie, which was quite funny to listen to. The experience had definitely brought out a different side of my darling daughter. On entering the flat Tom and I surveyed the mess from the meal. We packed away all the leftover food into the fridge and freezer and then decided the rest really could wait until the morning.

After we’d cleaned up the next morning we spent some time trying to work out between us what we were going to talk to Luke about the next day. Obviously the main topic of conversation was going to be how to introduce me to the fandom, but there was also wedding stuff and now the meet and greets that needed discussion too. I had a feeling it was going to be a long meeting. We spent the afternoon just lounging around enjoying time together, before our upcoming enforced separation. I was happier about how I’d cope with Tom being gone now, I figured it would no different really to the last two years for me except of course for the fact that there would be a gorgeous man coming home to me at the end of filming. How it would be for Tom I didn’t know. I wasn’t really sure how long it was since he’d had a serious girlfriend before me. I knew he liked to keep his private life private and so really didn’t like to ask. I just had to trust that he would tell me if any issues came up


	44. Chapter 44

            The next morning we were up fairly early to get ready to go and see Luke. Tom also put in an early call to his agents, Hamilton Hodell, to see if we could pop in after we’d finished with Luke and it was agreed that we could. Tom had decided, quite rightly, that his agents needed to know about me as I was going to be a significant part of his life from now on and it was better to do it before America than afterwards.

            Lizzie decided she didn’t want to sit in on ‘boring meetings’ all day so we left her behind with strict instructions to behave and set off. Tom had opted to drive the Jag as here were only two of us and even put the top down as it was a lovely day. With our sunglasses on in an open top car I really felt part of his world, the one people got to see at least. We pulled up at Luke’s offices and parked behind the building. As usual Tom jumped out quickly to open my door and help me out of the car. He didn’t let go as we approached the building for which I was grateful, there was something so comforting about his large hand being wrapped around mine that I was beginning to miss it when it wasn’t there.

            On entering the building Tom greeted the receptionist with his usual wide smile which she returned, casting a look my way as she did. Tom introduced me as his fiancée and her gaze slid towards my left hand. In response I showed her my engagement ring which she gasped over before informing Luke that we were there. As we were about to head for the lift she offered her congratulations, confiding in me that I had a ‘right sweetie’ in Tom. I giggled and told her I’d noticed.

            When we exited the lift Luke was there to greet us and led the way to his office. I was surprised to see that the chairs for his clients were soft and comfy and sank into a two seater straight away, Tom joining me. Once we were settled Luke got straight down to business. He told us he’d arranged an interview with Elle magazine for two days’ time, the magazine had already submitted their questions and he produced a copy for Tom and I to take away to look through so we could prepare answers and also veto any questions we didn’t like. I was pleased about that as I didn’t want too many questions about Lizzie preferring to focus on our relationship and plans for the future rather than dwelling on my sad past. There was going to be a photographer at the interview so Luke had also arranged for a stylist for me. The interview was going to be held in the afternoon in a hotel in the City so the stylist would meet us there in the morning. When I mentioned about dress sizes Luke told me not to worry, it wouldn’t be a problem. The idea was to make me look ‘more polished’ than usual. I was determined not to have my style, or lack of it, changed, especially not for this interview where I was being introduced to Tom’s legion of devout fans. I wanted to come across as one of them not some gold digging woman just after his money, which I was sure was what some of them would think.

Somewhat reassured the conversation turned towards the wedding. Tom told Luke about Eddington Court and the service they offered and explained that we had the place for the whole week giving the celebrity guests a secure base for their stay which Luke said was a good idea. Then Tom mentioned my meet and greet idea. Luke invited me to tell him my thoughts so I explained that London was a long way from Wiltshire and fans there couldn’t get to film premiers and the like easily. Having the Avengers cast and the stars of Sherlock on one place at one time seemed too good an opportunity to pass up to raise some money for a good cause and one that was close to Tom’s heart. Holding the events in the evening would hopefully mean that we were not encouraging truancy and if we did it on the Wednesday and Thursday we would still have one clear day before the wedding to prepare. Luke was impressed at how much I’d thought it through.

“If Marvel say ‘yes’ can you help me pull it together?” he asked

“Well” I replied “I’m no expert on things like that but of course I will help however I can”

“Having a fan girl on board can only be good” Luke said “you seem to have strong ideas about what you want. Leave it with me and I’ll see what I can do, but I can’t see it being much of a problem with it being such a good cause”

I smiled at him gratefully “Thanks Luke, I know you’ll do your best”

“There are just a couple more things” Luke said, reaching in a drawer of his desk for a box which he handed to me. “There’s a phone in there” he said “Synced to Tom’s and mine. Only Tom and I have the number and ours are the only two contacts. If you could keep it that way it would be great. It’s really so we just all know of any appointments or important meetings so we can avoid phoning then”

I looked at Tom and stifled a giggle. I knew what he was like for changing plans last minute and not letting anyone know in good time. Luke caught me looking and said meaningfully “Tom is going to get a lot better at putting any changes to his schedule into his calendar, aren’t you Tom?”

Tom sat there looking for all the world like a naughty schoolboy who’d been told off for the same thing once too often. “I’m sorry Luke” he muttered “I promise I’ll try harder.”


	45. Chapter 45

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So my lovlies, Christmas falls on a Friday, this year as you all know, and there is no chance I will be able to post then so I thought I'd post early this week. I'm sorry this chapter is not remotely festive but I wish you and yours A Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year or Happy Holidays (depending on where you live :D) I'll see you all again soon Roo

            Luke left him alone then, well on that subject anyway. He looked at us both and said “Now I know you only have this week together before I Saw the Light but do you think you could manage a couple of photo ops as well as the magazine interview? Tom, take Jackie to the theatre or dinner or both, just let me know in advance so I can drop the word in the right ears and get the friendly paps there.” He looked at me as I instinctively curled as close as I could to Tom, my hand reaching over the small gap between us to clasp his tightly. Tom gently swapped my hand to his free one and put the one I’d been holding around my shoulders comfortingly.

“It’ll be fine Darling” he murmured “you have to learn to trust Luke like I do. He’s never steered me wrong yet. It will only be a couple of photographers and maybe a couple of fans?” he directed this last bit at Luke who nodded.

“A couple of my nieces, guaranteed to get it on Twitter. Trust me Jackie once the fans see how happy you both are together that’s half the battle won, the rest will follow on naturally” Luke stated confidently “I haven’t had to do this for Tom but it has worked beautifully for a previous client”

I relaxed slightly at his words. I knew I was being silly but I couldn’t help it, I was a fan girl from the countryside about to spend the rest of my life with the hottest man on the planet, joining a world I hardly knew about. I wasn’t going to let my fears stop me though I had a feeling they might slow me down a bit. Tom felt my posture relax slightly and gave me a comforting squeeze.

“We’ll talk tonight and sort something Luke and I’ll let you know. Are they going to be at the airport on Friday too?”

“Yes” said Luke “seems like a good idea ‘the reluctant fiancé saying goodbye to the love of his life’”

I groaned quietly “You’re making our lives sound like a trashy romance novel Luke, it’s not helping me feel any better” I whined.

“It will all be fine” Tom gently chided me “my flight isn’t until the late afternoon so we can spend the morning together, just you me and Lizzie and say our proper goodbyes there then Lizzie can stay at mine or Mum’s whilst Jeff takes us to the airport for a public goodbye as Luke suggested. We can even bring Luke along as Security if you want.” And he winked at me. I giggled a little bit. Luke was the same build as Tom but was a little shorter; neither of them looked particularly strong although I knew Tom kept himself in very good shape.

“I’m sorry” I apologised to them both “I’m just so new to this and I’m really not sure what to expect”

“It’s fine” Luke said “it’s really fine, just be yourself and don’t worry about anything, that’s my job and seeing as you are an important of Tom’s life that makes you my responsibility too. I’m aware of how you want Lizzie out of all the craziness as much as possible for at least a year and I think we can do that easily until the wedding at least. After that it may be slightly more difficult but I can coach you both on how to let it all wash over your heads” he pointed at my new phone “you have my numbers on there, any problems let me know, don’t sit and stew about silly things. I meant what I said about being there for you as well now”

I looked at them both gratefully “Thank you both so much for listening to my petty worries. I know you know what you are doing and will deal with this the best as possible. I really don’t want to be a bother”

“Nonsense!” they chorused

“I love you so much” said Tom “I don’t want this to be horrible for you at all, but if it has to be then at least you know you’ve got us to fall back on. I know you are strong and can do this”

Luke chimed in “This week will be the worst because there is so much to cram in to a short time. When Tom’s away the Elle interview will come out, that could be a bit tricky with fan backlash, if any, but you should be fairly secure in Wiltshire and you know how to get hold of me. It should quiet down then until the wedding, by which time you should have a better handle on things, and if you don’t” he shrugged “it will all take just a little bit longer but we will still be there for you. I’m with Tom, you are strong, you just may not realise it yet”

            On that positive note the meeting was over and we stood up to leave. Farewells made we headed downstairs again in the lift. I sagged against Tom drawing comfort from his strength. I knew it would be OK, no matter what his fans said we would still get married, I didn’t doubt that for a minute, but I’d still have to deal with being ‘introduced’ to the fans without Tom physically by my side. I knew pictures wouldn’t mean much without words and the interview would definitely be out after he’d gone. I decided there and then to stay off social media as much as possible whilst Tom was away, though I would still follow Tom’s Twitter account. My Tumblr was laughingly referred to by Lizzie as my ‘Tom’blr, as I only followed people who posted about Tom, though I never read any of the comments attached to the pictures, just enjoyed new pictures of Tom when they appeared!


	46. Chapter 46

            The lift doors chimed open and I was pulled from my thoughts. Tom had been quiet on the short journey down, no doubt giving me time to star processing what would happen when he was away. As we left the lift his hand and arm wrapped around my waist and he gave me a comforting hug.

“Are you OK Darling?” he murmured so that only I could hear.

“I will be” I said just as quietly “I think it’s just hitting me what it’s going to mean to be Mrs. Tom Hiddleston, apart from being able to call you my husband of course”

“And what do you think it’s going to mean?” he asked, voice full of curiosity.

I shrugged “Red carpets, movie premiers, screaming fans, long trips for you filming, lots of pictures of you on the internet” he frowned at that, I carried on hurriedly “that’s ok though, I can stand to look at pictures of you all day” I said sincerely.

            We were at his car by now and I looked at him square on. I took his hand from his side and held it over my heart. “I want you to understand that this” and I patted my chest with his hand “is yours, utterly and completely, forever and ever but…” and I moved his hand to my forehead “this is having a hard time coming to terms with what that entails. I will get there but it may take some time. Still going to marry you in February though, never fear”

A wide smile spread over his face “You had me worried there for a minute” he said “I thought you’d decided it was all too much and had changed your mind!”

“”Never!” I exclaimed and pulled him into a big hug and kiss to prove how much I loved him. When we broke the kiss Tom opened the car door for me and got me settled, he trotted round to the driver’s side, started the engine and we headed for his agents.

            Hamilton Hodell’s offices were in a smart old town house in a square close to Regent’s Street. Tom managed to find some on street parking and make our way quickly to Reception. When we got there Tom spoke to the receptionist, his hand never leaving mine. The receptionist put a call through to Tom’s agent and we were invited to go on up to their office. When we got there Tom knocked politely on the door and a voice from inside invited us in. Tom opened the door and we stepped into a large office. A rotund man got up from behind his desk and came towards us.

“Tom, my boy” he said “I wasn’t expecting to see you in the flesh until after Christmas. Is something the matter?”

As they shook hands Tom responded “No Malcolm, there’s nothing the matter. I just wanted you to meet someone and let you know of some changes to my circumstances. This” and he pulled me closer “is Jackie, my fiancée.” Malcolm’s gaze turned towards me and he held out his hand to shake “Malcolm Stokes” he said “Pleased to meet you”

“Jackie” I said unnecessarily and stopped, slightly flustered. Malcolm smiled but said nothing. We sat together in a group of arm chairs surrounding a small table. Before we got too comfortable Malcolm rang for refreshments and soon we were furnished with tea and coffee.

Tom started the conversation off “So Malcolm, Jackie and I are getting married on 28th February next year, so I want to make sure that you don’t sign me up for anything major between my birthday and the start of that big project in March. I’ll obviously any commitments we’ve already made and will be available for small stuff of one or two days but nothing bigger than that. OK?” I was intrigued then, what big project in March? I hadn’t been told anything but maybe Tom had been sworn to utmost secrecy. At least I knew now that I’d find out sooner rather than later!

“Sure” Malcolm said easily “There’s not a lot on the cards for then at the moment and I’ll be sure to honour your wishes if I’m asked for you.”

“Thank you” replied Tom “That’s good to know. Just one more thing, when I’m home next year I’ll be based in Wiltshire until late summer. Jackie’s daughter is due to do her GCSE’s and there is no way we are making her change schools at this late stage. Obviously I will still come up for meetings but I will need a bit more notice than before. I hope that’s not going to be a problem? I still want you as my agents, we work well together but I will have a family to consider too

“That’s fine Tom” said Malcolm “Thank you for thinking about it and finding a workable solution, we’d hate to lose you”

“And I’d hate to have to change” replied Tom “I wouldn’t be where I am today without you and I will ever be grateful.” And with that our conversation was over, we stood up to say our farewells. Malcolm kissed me on the cheek and said “Bye Jackie. I look forward to meeting you again”

“Goodbye Malcolm” I responded “I’m sure we’ll see more of each other in the future”

Malcolm then turned to Tom “See you, my boy, good luck with filming in America, you know where we are”

Tom smiled broadly “Bye Malcolm. I’ll see you when I get back from filming” he held out his arm to me and I linked arms with him as we left the office and went back down to the street to head home.


	47. Chapter 47

Ch. 47

            It had taken all morning and a fair part of the early afternoon to have out two meetings, though the one with Malcolm had been quite brief. We were both hungry so I made us a lunch of chicken sandwiches, slicing avocado for Tom’s but leaving it out of mine, I wasn’t a fan of that strange fruit. Lunch over we sat down together to peruse the questions for our forthcoming magazine interview. They seemed pretty straightforward to me: Where did you meet? ; What attracted you to each other? ; How did he propose? There were a couple of questions about my past, which was inevitable and Tom suggested gently that I couldn’t veto those however much I wanted to. I still got a bit sad when I thought about Sean for without him I wouldn’t have Lizzie and she was the best thing that I had done. The loss of Mum and Dad was still raw and had caught me unawares a few times when I found myself wondering what they would have made of Tom. I hoped that they were looking down on me with approval that I was finally moving on with my life.

            I spotted one question with the word ‘daughter’ and ‘adopt’ in it but Tom had put a thick line through it before I could read it properly. I trusted his judgement. He’d done numerous interviews by now and must know what questions to avoid before you stepped into a word trap you could not get out of. Finally we were satisfied with the questions we had OK’d; it had taken a lot longer than I thought it would as Tom had taken the time to explain how a seemingly innocuous question could turn into something quite devastating in the follow up if you didn’t pay attention to what you were saying. I was grateful for his coaching and tried to listen carefully and take it all in because I was sure there would be plenty of opportunities for me to get it wrong without him. Tom sent the amended questions back to Luke and then talk turned to photo ops. He was being very kind trying to break me I into his world as gently as possible given the circumstances but we were both aware that we practically had one shot at this.

“So Darling, dinner out or a show? He asked

I thought about it briefly “A show please. I haven’t been on the same side of the stage as you yet and I want to know what it’s like”

“OK” he responded “what do you want to see?”

My answer was ready this time “A musical please. I don’t mind which one, it’s so short notice we could end up with anything!”

He smiled gently at me “Oh I think I could pull a few strings Darling, after all I am rather well known! I’ll get on with it right away” he looked at me thoughtfully “It will have to be Wednesday evening though I think. Tomorrow is a bit short notice and I want you all to myself on Thursday so that really only leaves Wednesday”

And with those few words my week vanished. All of a sudden Friday, flight day, was looming far too large on the horizon and I didn’t like it one little bit. I understood, of course, that he was contractually obliged to go abroad to film, it was his career after all but that didn’t mean I had to like it! I moved closer to Tom on the sofa, snuggling under his arm, seeking comfort and protection whilst I could. He responded as I knew he would, pulling me in for a big hug and telling me over and over that everything would be OK, that he’d be back before I knew it, that there were so many ways to communicate now and most of all that he loved me and would always come back to me. I couldn’t believe the change in me, five months previously I could never have imagined having a man in my life and now I couldn’t imagine being without Tom for longer than five days. How times had changed.

            Tom managed to drag my wandering thoughts back to the matter in hand by saying “Actually Darling, we might have to do dinner and a show after all, I’ve been thinking and the photo op outside the restaurant will be easier to manage than at the theatre. We’re not trying to make things difficult for the photographers and there will be too many people milling around after the show”

“OK” I said slowly “so, a nice meal just the two of us, because I don’t want any press photos of Lizzie just yet, then photos as we get into a car to go to the theatre? And no photos at the show?”

“Yes” he said “That sounds about right. Shall I leave it to Luke to book it? I can send him a quick text now and then it will still be a bit of a surprise for you, more like a date than an obligation?”

“Yes, OK” I replied, and then I suddenly thought out loud “Oh, what am I going to wear, and what about hair and make-up!”

Tom stopped mid text “Oh, that’s easy” he said cheerfully “We’ll get the stylist on Wednesday to come up with an outfit and I’ll buy it for you”

I looked at him aghast “You can do that?” I said with a squeak.

“Of course I can Darling, it’s no bother” and he turned back to his text message to Luke

“Tom?” I said hesitantly, nor really wanting to interrupt him again. He turned to look at me “No ball gowns, not yet. I need to work up to that!”

“Of course Darling, anything you want” he said with that mega-watt smile “no ball gowns, got it!” he finished the text and hit send. Less than twenty minutes later he got a reply but refused to let me see it, wanting to keep the details secret. He smiled happily as he read it through, so I guessed it must be good news.


	48. Chapter 48

Tuesday passed quietly, we had confirmation from Luke that our question choices had been accepted by Elle magazine and the stylist and hotel had been booked and confirmed. Jeff was to drive us all day and Lizzie was going to spend the day with Diana and Emma so they could get to know each other a bit better. Diana had pretty much taken on a grandmotherly role with Lizzie from the first time they met; she never said anything but I knew that she’d accepted Lizzie as a step-granddaughter, without trying to replace Lizzie’s memories of Mum of course, and Emma? Well Emma was a weird sort of cross between a big sister and auntie but the best bits of both so I knew the three of them would be ok. There had been talk of a shopping trip and a sleepover so the original one day was extended to two. Emma would pick Lizzie up just before we were due to leave for the hotel to meet the stylist and bring her back bright and early on the Friday morning so that she could say her goodbye to Tom before he went to the airport.

            We made the Tuesday night a movie night, watching together the films that we enjoyed the most, all snuggled on the sofa with Tom in the middle his ‘best girls’ on either side. It was more really good family time and I knew that it would be hard to watch those films again without the love of my life next to me. We had a reasonably late night but went to bed happy. Lizzie was looking forward to her couple of days with Diana and Emma but I wasn’t so sure if I was looking forward to the next day or not. Tom, as ever, seemed to sense my unease and held me slightly tighter in bed that night whispering reassurances in my ear until I fell asleep.

            The next morning Tom was up early as usual for his run. Whilst he was out I scoured my wardrobe looking for something suitable to wear, I knew I was going to meet a stylist but I just wanted her to ‘polish’ my style, not foist a fake one on me. In the end I narrowed it down to two outfits, the pink and blue I’d worn for our first Sunday lunch at my cottage or the floral dress I’d worn the week after for our woodland meal. I resolved to ask Tom what he thought when he came back. He suggested I took both and we let the stylist decide or she might have other, better ideas so I borrowed one of Tom’s suit holders to put both outfits in. after he’d showered and changed into jeans and a T-shirt we had breakfast. He’d sorted his clothes out the night before, before we settled down to the movies. He was going to wear a plain black suit with a light blue shirt and a black tie, and looked predictably gorgeous on it.

            Emma soon turned up closely followed by Jeff and it was time to go. As Emma and Lizzie headed in one direction Jeff drove Tom and I into central London. My nerves were showing again however much I tried to tamp them down and I found myself holding Tom’s hand in a tight grip before too long. He started rubbing this thumb over the back of my hand trying to surreptitiously soothe me and I have to say it worked for a bit, well distracted me more like. I realised that the tight hand holding was fast becoming a signal to each other that we weren’t particularly comfortable with a given situation. I was more affected than Tom but then he had his acting skills to call on and could ‘act’ confident whereas I couldn’t.

            Before long we had pulled up in the underground car park of the hotel. Jeff got out opening the door for Tom, who got out and promptly leaned back into the car to help me out. Jeff got the suit bags out of the boot of the car and followed us up to Reception via the lift. Luke was waiting for us in Reception having already checked us in. he led us to another lift and pushed the button for the top floor. As I realised where we were heading I gasped quietly to myself, but Tom heard me anyway and gave my hand a reassuring squeeze, as Luke was asking him a question at the time.

            The lift soon stopped and Luke led the way to the door of the suite we had for the day. Opening the door he stepped inside and we followed. I looked around in amazement. I had never been in such a sumptuous hotel room, there was a living area furnished with soft looking chairs and sofas, a bedroom with a huge bed with loads of scatter cushions and throws, a large en-suite bathroom complete with an actual bath and a dressing room which was empty for the moment. Tom took the garment bags from Jeff and thanked him for his help as he left us to it, saying goodbye with a cheery “call me when you need me Mr. Hiddleston.” Luke disappeared downstairs to wait for the stylist, leaving Tom and I alone in the suite.

“Do you always stay in rooms like this?” I asked in awe.

“Oh no Darling” Tom replied “some places I’ve been to I’ve been lucky to get a bed and a shower! This is nice though isn’t it?”

“It’s lovely” I sighed looking out of the view out of the window “I can’t believe I’m really doing this, little old me about to be introduced to the world as your fiancée. It’s all a bit surreal”

“You’ll be wonderful Darling” he said still reassuring me “just be yourself, don’t answer any questions you don’t want to and give my hands two quick squeezes if you want me to answer for you”

I smiled at him “You’ve noticed that too then?”

“Noticed what?”

“The way we communicate how we feel by squeezing the other’s hand” I replied

“Oh yes, it’s a really good thing, nobody but us knows what the other is feeling and we can compensate for that. To the rest of the world we’re just holding hands and there’s nothing more natural than two people in love holding hands” he smiled and lent down to kiss me.


	49. Chapter 49

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just an advance warning I may not be able to post on Friday next week as hubby is home on holiday, however I will be posting on Saturday if I can't post on Friday so you will still get your weekly update :)

We were interrupted by Luke re-entering the suite with a young woman and a porter with a clothes rack full of garment bags. The rack was wheeled into the dressing room and the porter left after Tom had tipped him. After he’d gone the young woman walked over to Tom and gave him a kiss on the cheek as she exclaimed “Tom dear, it’s been too long since I’ve seen you. How have you been?” I looked on slightly shocked as Tom replied “Janet, nice to see you too. I’m fine, more than fine actually, there’s someone I’d like you to meet” and he turned to me.

“Jackie, this is Janet, my stylist when I’m in England and Janet, this is Jackie, my fiancée.” I smiled and held out my hand which she took with a smile. Introductions over Janet got down to work.

“So I understand from Luke that you’ve got your first interview this afternoon and then this evening it is dinner and a show?” she said briskly

“That’s right” replied Tom smiling at me

“Right, well we’ll get this afternoon sorted first and then worry about this evening. Tom, be a sweetheart and go and pop your suit on for me so I can see what I’ve got to work with colour wise” Janet demanded. Tom meekly grabbed his stuff and disappeared into the bedroom.

Janet turned to me, looking me up and down “Well I think you’re going to be easy to style” she decided after a quick appraisal. “What sort of look are you aiming for?”

I hesitated. I knew what I wanted but I wasn’t sure if Janet would agree with it. Luke caught my eye and smiled encouragingly.

“I suppose really” I started “I want to look like a slightly more polished version of myself. I’m not glamorous in any way so I don’t want to look like something I’m not. I brought a couple of outfits with me if that helps?”

“Oh yes, that’s good” Janet replied “go and pop one on in the dressing room for me please” I headed off in the direction of the dressing room as Tom emerged from the bedroom all suited up. The sight of him near took my breath away, it had been a while since I’d seen him in a suit and I’d forgotten quite how good he looked. The pale blue shirt looked really good under the black suit and the tie set it all off beautifully. We stood smiling at each other for a long moment until Janet coughed pointedly and said “Sometime today please Jackie!” I apologised and scurried off to the dressing room. I put on the royal blue skirt and pink top first and emerged hesitantly back into the main room. As soon as Tom noticed me he held out his hand to me smiling widely and pulled me close kissing me briefly on the lips and murmured in my ear “You look gorgeous, Darling”

“Thanks” I replied “so do you!”

Janet looked at Luke “Are they like this all the time?” She asked

“Pretty much” Luke replied with a chuckle “I’ve never seen Tom so happy though so I tend to let them get on with it”

“Well” said Janet, “some of us have got work to do. Let’s have a look at you both” we stood side by side as Janet looked at us critically. Finally she spoke “That’s a lovely outfit Jackie, It really suits you but it doesn’t quite go with what Tom’s wearing, the blues don’t work together. How about you go and pop your other outfit on?”

“OK” I said and headed off again. I changed quickly into my floral dress. It was my favourite summer dress. It had a white background covered with tiny flowers in pastel and pale colours, various shades of pink, blue, lilac and yellow, a fitted bodice with a sweetheart neckline and a full calf length skirt. I usually wore it with a white linen jacket and it made me feel special. It was also the dress I was wearing when Tom asked me to be his girlfriend, so it seemed appropriate to wear it for the interview where I would be introduced as such to the world. As I emerged once more from the dressing room and made my way to Janet I could see from Tom’s expression that the dress was a hit again, or maybe he was just reminiscing too. Janet called us over and we stood next to each other our arms naturally snaking around our partner’s waist. This time Janet gave an approving nod.

“Yes, that’s perfect, you two. Some of the flowers on the dress are the exact shade of Tom’s shirt and it brings out the blue of both your eyes, so just minimal make-up I think for the natural look and you’re good to go” she took Tom to the dressing room to apply just a touch of powder to hide his (hardly there) imperfections. Luke looked at me kindly

“OK Jackie?” he asked

“Yes, well I think so” I said quietly “glad I’m wearing my own clothes but still getting a bit nervous now”

“No need to be nervous” countered Luke “Elle have been good to Tom, that’s why we picked them. You will be fine, just follow Tom’s lead. What bit are you most worried about?”

I thought for a moment “The interview” I said decisively “I really don’t want to come across the wrong way”

“OK” said Luke “we’ll get the photos done first then, whilst you’re still a bit relaxed and then the questions”

At that point Tom came back into the main room and it was my turn to be made presentable. Janet sat me down and covered my clothes with a swathe of fabric to protect them from any stray powder. She looked at me critically and decided that, like for Tom, less was more so applied a light foundation over my face, a blue eyeshadow to bring out my eyes, a pale pink on my lips, and a light dusting of powder on my cheeks, as a finishing touch she gave me a mini manicure and applied pale pink polish to match my lipstick. As I was still keeping my hair short it was quickly dampened and restyled to give it slightly more volume and an actual style. When I was deemed finished Janet told me how much she was looking forward to later when she would get me ready for the evening.


	50. Chapter 50

            I made my way back into the main room and was rewarded by the sight of both Tom’s and Luke’s jaws literally dropping and their eyes opening wide. “I take it you approve?” I said, slightly amazed at the effect I’d had on both of them. Tom covered the space between us in his long strides and pulled me close, careful not to smudge anything.

“Oh yes” he breathed “if you look this good now I can’t wait until Janet has worked her magic for tonight”

“I hope you won’t be too disappointed” I said

“With you? Never!” Tom said quickly, quelling any talk of the evening to come so we could focus on the afternoon ahead.

Janet had followed me back into the main room “OK Tom? Luke?”

“Yes” they chorused with Tom adding “thank you very much”

“You’re always welcome Tom, so easy to work with, and easy on the eye too” Janet replied. Tom blushed slightly as I giggled quietly by his side, not wanting to stray too far from him all of a sudden.

“You’ll be back in a couple of hours Janet?” Luke asked

“Yes. Of course, someone’s got to sort these two out for tonight and I can’t think of anyone better” Janet said smugly. We all smiled as she left.

            It seemed only a short time before the room phone rang and Luke answered it. “OK. Yes” he said “Please send them on up” I gripped Tom’s hand a little tighter as Luke turned to us and said, simply “Ready?” Tom nodded in the affirmative and I just shrugged. I didn’t think I’d ever be ready for this but I knew it had to be done. There was a knock at the door and I jumped slightly. Tom made soothing noises in my ear as Luke answered the door. He returned into the main room followed by a young man carrying what seemed to be a multitude of bags and a very petite woman who had just one bag slung over her shoulder. They were introduced as Jamie, the photographer and Joy the interviewer.

            Straight away Jamie started to set up his cameras and lights as Joy started chatting to us, not about the interview but about how pleased she was to meet Tom and I and how grateful she was that we’d given her ‘the scoop of her life’. I couldn’t help but hope she wouldn’t be disappointed. Jamie was soon ready and we started to discuss poses and positions, as I was a complete novice at this I was more than happy to let Tom make the decisions. I knew he’d done many photo shoots, though not generally with a partner so trusted him to know what would and wouldn’t work.

            We started with simple stuff, holding hands for the camera, showing off the ring. Tom standing behind me, holding me tight, whilst looking forward over my shoulder. I gradually relaxed and let Tom and Jamie place me where they wanted for the best shots, all I had to do was remember to look at Tom and smile, not particularly difficult or even a hardship. Finally we were done and Jamie set about loading the pictures onto his laptop so we could review them and choose the ones we wanted for the spread, or at least reject the ones we didn’t like.

            It was Joy’s turn then, we all sat in comfy chairs in the living area, a voice recorder on the table between us which I looked at warily. Tom assured me that it was standard practice for interviews like this. He wasn’t worried so I decided not to be either. Joy started with simple questions about me and what I did for a living. Of course I wasn’t doing anything at this point which worried me slightly as I automatically thought that people would think I was just after Tom’s money. I said I’d recently been made redundant and that I hoped to be working again soon. The story of how we had met had to be gone over, obviously, and it made it seem like a fairy tale but it was true, all of it. And then

Joy: - “So Tom when did you realise that you really liked Jackie?”

Tom: - “Um, about halfway down that first cup of coffee actually. Jackie is everything I look for in a woman, intelligent, independent, incredibly strong and beautiful as well”

I blushed, although we had discussed what questions we would allow in the interview we hadn’t talked about our responses. I had no idea that Tom had fallen for me that quickly. Joy then turned to me

Joy: - “And Jackie, was it Loki that did it for you?”

Me: - “Actually no, I’ve been a fan of Tom’s since Wallander and although Loki will always have a special place in my heart for bringing us together, I actually prefer Prince Hal / Henry V. He brought that character so vividly to life I have to keep reminding myself I’m watching a play, not a documentary every time I see it, which is fairly often!”

It was Tom’s turn to look surprised. He knew I was a fan of course, but I’m not sure he knew for how long I’d admired him. Joy turned to Tom again

Joy: - “so you are off to America very soon Tom, how do you think that will affect your relationship?”

Tom: - “I’m sure we will be fine, there are so many ways to communicate now that staying in touch should not be a problem”

Joy: - “And Jackie?”

Me: - “same here really. I can’t honestly say I’m looking forward to it. Tom thinks he’ll be gone quite a while but I’ll be here waiting for him when he gets back”

Joy: - “And then wedding bells?”

Tom: - “Ah well, we haven’t settled on a date yet, but we will in the fullness of time” he leaned forward and gave me a kiss on the cheek “this woman is worth waiting for!”

A few more questions and it was all over. Joy finished by saying it had been a long time since she’s interviewed a couple so obviously in love as we were and wished us all the happiness for the future. Jamie then showed us the pictures from the shoot, they were all really good and I was surprised at how nice I looked. They were, of course, all ‘classic’ engagement photos, showing the ring. My favourite of those was one of Tom behind me, my left hand reaching over to his hand resting on my right shoulder, our heads turned towards each other. The best one of all for me though was one that was not going to be used in the article. In it I was gazing at my ring, not paying attention to anything else and Tom was looking at me with complete adoration written all over his face. I have no idea how I didn’t realise Tom was that close to me at that point or that the photo had been taken, but I loved it the moment I saw it and I asked Jamie if I could have a copy anyway. Luke overheard me asking and told Jamie to send it to his email and he would send it from there. I appreciated like’s concern over my private email address and told him so.

“You’re part of Tom’s life and his world now” Luke reminded me “of course I’ll look after you.”

After Jamie had made a note of which pictures we wanted he and Joy took their leave, promising to send copies of the article to Luke when it was finished and then it was all over! Luke and Tom congratulated me on how I’d done. Luke said I’d come across really naturally and the ‘real’ me had shone through. Tom just hugged me tight and told me I’d been fantastic.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, sorry for the days delay my friends, should be back on my normal schedule next week :D


	51. Chapter 51

            I felt a little light headed so Tom rang down for some sandwiches from room service along with a large cup of coffee for me and tea for him and Luke. The snack arrived quickly and was promptly devoured, the coffee being especially welcome. Before I knew it Janet was back to style me for the evening, she’d obviously gotten a good idea of what I liked earlier in the day because she went straight to the clothes rack and grabbed just two garment bags.

“Tom dear” she said, and he looked up quickly “what are you wearing tonight please?” he flashed a quick smile and answered “same suit but with a matching waistcoat, white shirt and the same tie”

“Ah”, said Janet “the usual uniform then?!” and they both chuckled. I smiled too, there was something wonderful about Tom in a three piece, and I could never get enough of it. Janet bustled me away to have a quick freshen up before getting ready for the evening so I had a quick shower and felt better for it. Slipping into clean underwear, I pulled on a bath robe and went to find Janet. We went into the dressing room and she showed me the dress I would be wearing that night. It was absolutely gorgeous, a deep blue satin, with a fitted bodice and rounded neckline. The very full skirt was calf length again and held out with a layer of fitted petticoats. A matching pair of shoes was produced and I slipped them on, they were only 2” high and really comfortable. I slipped them off so Janet could help me into the dress, it was a perfect fit and the colour complimented my skin and hair tones beautifully. After re doing my make-up Janet declared herself finished and I looked at my reflection in the full length mirror. I was astounded to see how different I looked, still me but more and I thanked Janet profusely for all her hard work. She demurred and said it was no trouble at all as I was so easy to style and it had been a pleasure to meet me.

            Walking out to see the two men again I was ready for their reaction this time but it was still a thrill to see that it was as good as the first time.

“No one will be looking at you tonight Tom” said Luke

“Oh yes they will” countered Tom “if only because I will have the most beautiful woman by my side all night”

I blushed to hear him say that. I knew that tonight was about showing the world how much in love we were but I was still getting used to all the compliments. Tom produced a large flat box from somewhere and presented it to me.

“Open it” he said gently. I did as I was told and gasped. Nestled in the cream satin lining of the box was a pair of heart shaped sapphire earrings set in gold and a matching pendant on a delicate gold chain. “Do you like them?” he continued as he picked up the necklace to place it around my neck.

“They’re beautiful Tom” I said softly trying not to cry and failing miserably as two big tears rolled down my cheeks. A feather light kiss was placed on the nape of my neck as the necklace clasp was done up and Tom came round to stand in front of me.

“Darling, what’s up? Why are you crying?” he asked full of concern as his thumbs gently wiped away the tears.

“I don’t know” I replied “I’m happy and sad at the same time, nervous and excited as well. I think I’m just overwhelmed”

“We don’t have to go out if you don’t want to” he said softly

“No” I sniffed “it’s fine, there’s no way we’re not doing tonight now after all the effort everyone has put in”

He looked from me to Luke, who just shrugged, and then back to me again. “If you’re sure?” he said cautiously.

“I’m sure” I said determined not to spoil our evening “just… don’t let go. OK?”

I got a small smile from him “OK, got it. No letting go” and he grasped my hand in his and squeezed gently. “Though I will have to let go in a minute” he said mischievously.

“Why?” I asked worried

“I’m not changed yet!” he chuckled, I looked and saw he was still in the shirt from the photo shoot.

“Well OK then, you can let go now” I pouted “but I want your hand back in mine as soon as possible” he threw me a cheeky salute and went to the bathroom to freshen up and change.

When he was gone Luke came over. “You’re doing great” he said “I know you’re nervous but really it will be fine. Tom’s not going to let anything happen, you’re too important to him. You’ll both have a lovely night and thoroughly enjoy yourselves”

“Thank you Luke for everything” I said “You’ve both been so patient with me during all my little ‘wobbles’. I really don’t know how to thank you”

“Well that, at least, is easy” replied Luke “be yourself tonight and the photos will speak for themselves, don’t speak if you don’t want to and let Tom take care of you. He’ll let me know how you both got on later.”

At that moment Tom re-emerged from the bathroom, looking every inch the Hollywood ‘A’ lister he deserved to be. He smiled as he pointedly took my hand.

“OK?” he asked softly

“I am now” I responded

“You both ready?” asked Luke “because it’s nearly time to go so you don’t miss your dinner reservation”

We made our way to the hotel lobby and outside where the ever dependable Jeff was waiting with the car. Tom opened the door for me and I slipped inside, being careful of my dress. Tom got in beside me and we set off.

“You know where we’re headed Jeff?” Tom queried

“Yes, Mr Hiddleston, Mr Windsor made me aware of the plans for tonight.” Jeff replied with a smile directed at me in the rear view mirror. I gave a small smile back, I wasn’t sure quite what they were playing at, whether they were trying to put me at my ease by making a joke of being overly formal with each other when I knew they were more friends than employer and employee, or if this was an indication of how formal this first part of the evening was going to be.


	52. Chapter 52

We pulled up at The Reuben Hotel on Buckingham Palace Road. The area was quite busy but looking quickly around I couldn’t spot any obvious photographers. Tom noticed me glancing around and said “They won’t be here until we are ready to leave; we get to enjoy our meal first.” I smiled happily; I was glad that we could have our meal in peace as I really didn’t want any massive intrusions to spoil this special time. It was bad enough that they would be there afterwards, though I totally understood the reasons why.

            We were shown to a table in The Old Library part of the hotel, an elegant room with a few tables and large comfortable arm chairs. The library was quite large and only had a few tables so that no table was too close to any other. All the other tables were occupied and heads turned as we walked towards out seats. There were a couple of families with teenage girls, I spotted them starting to whisper excitedly to each other as we passed and I started to feel very self-conscious. True to his word Tom had not let go, we had held hands from the car and now, as we made our way to our table, his hand was on the small of my back, guiding me and reminding me at every step he was there behind me.

            When we got to our table Tom pulled out the chair that left me with my back to the majority of the room, I think he wanted to be able to alert me subtly if the teenagers plucked up the courage to come over for which I was grateful. The waiter appeared with the menus and a wine list. The menu looked particularly appetising, but I thought I’d better stick with light, easy to eat dishes with no heavy sauces as I didn’t want to make a mess of my new dress. Perusing the menu it was obviously a couple of steps up from where we’d taken the girls for Lizzie’s birthday. There were dishes on the menu I’d never heard of so I decided to play safe with my dish selection. After giving us a reasonable amount of time to choose our meals the waiter returned. I ordered a starter of Melon Trio, which was Watermelon, Galia melon and Canteloupe melon with Parma ham and Tom chose chicken Noodle soup with mini Chicken Pie. For our main course I chose Corn Fed Chicken Duo with sweet potato, black garlic, seared chard and sundried tomatoes and Tom chose Dover Sole with parmentier potatoes with a chive and lemon butter sauce.

            The pudding choice was really difficult but I finally settled on Raspberry Crème Brulee and tom went for a Baked Vanilla Cheesecake. The waiter then mentioned the wine list, Tom looked at me and I shook my head. I didn’t need my low tolerance for alcohol working against me tonight. He thought for a moment then asked for a bottle of mineral water for us both.

“Still or sparkling Darling?”

“Still please” I said

He turned back to the waiter to confirm our order. After the waiter had left I said to Tom “You could have had wine if you’d wanted”

“I know” said Tom “but it will make a pleasant change not to” Changing the subject he said “Are you excited about the theatre?”

“Oh Yes!” I gushed “I’ve not been to many, just a couple in Bristol but never one in London, apart from yours of course”

“Well you won’t be disappointed “said Tom kindly “it’s not the same as mine but it will still be a good evening’s entertainment”

Just then the waiter arrived with our starters. I smiled widely when I saw Tom’s, I don’t know how they did it but there was the sweetest pie floating in Tom’s soup, really dainty and perfect. My melon was arranged beautifully on the plate too, decent bite sized pieces artfully interspersed with the Parma Ham. It all looked very delicious and tasted as good as it looked. Tom invited me to try his Chicken Noodle soup but I declined too much danger of spillage as far as I was concerned. When we’d finished the waiter cleared our plates, topped up our water glasses and headed away again.

“How are you feeling?” Tom asked solicitously

“Honestly?” I asked, he nodded “As nervous as anything” I said quietly “but I think I’ll cope, just don’t leave me anywhere”

“I won’t” he said seriously “You know I won’t”

“I know” I said

“I won’t lie to you” he continued still in serious mode “the next two to three weeks may be very difficult for us both, not only dealing with our enforced separation, but also the fan’s reaction to our news. I’m confident most of them will be happy for us both but there is always a small minority that may take exception to the news. I want you to promise me here and now that if you get the slightest bit of trouble you will tell Luke immediately and that applies to Lizzie as well. I won’t have my family hounded by anybody. If it gets too bad I may take to twitter myself but I want to avoid that if possible, people are entitled to their opinions but not at the expense of causing us upset!” he stopped speaking

“Wow!” I said “That was quite a speech. Um. Thank you” I finished quietly

“For what?” asked Tom

“For being willing to defend me and for all you are doing to make this as easy as possible for Lizzie and I to be with you”

“You’re being a silly goose again” Tom said smiling gently at me “Of course I will defend you; you are my fiancée, the most important woman in my world”

I could feel myself blushing and was glad that my back to the room so that only Tom could see my face.

“You’re even more beautiful like that” he said sweetly and I blushed some more. The waiter chose that moment to reappear bringing our main courses with him. Again the plates looked divine, the food beautifully presented, the portions just enough. My chicken was succulent through and through and perfectly complimented by the sweet potato, black garlic and sautéed chard. Tom’s Dover Sole looked like it was ready to fall off the bone if he breathed on it and he pronounced it the best he’d ever tasted. Our conversation lulled as we ate. I was trying not to worry about the next hour or so. I trusted Tom to look after me and make things as easy as possible but things can go wrong and I hoped he’d also thought of a contingency plan.

            The waiter appeared as if from nowhere to remove the dirty plates and it didn’t seem long until he was back carrying the most delicious desserts I’d ever seen. Tom’s cheesecake was tall and proud, no hint of sag anywhere and was dotted through with miniscule vanilla seeds. My Raspberry Crème Brule came served with a tiny jug of Raspberry coulis and the dessert itself was toasted to perfection, crunchy sugar on top with whole raspberries in the vanilla crème below, sheer heaven. In fact both puddings looked so good that we had to try a bit of each other’s, which we did, feeding each other across the table as if we were teenagers on our first date. I have to say the puddings both tasted as good as they looked. When we’d finally finished our last mouthfuls and pushed our plates away, Tom suddenly stiffened slightly and looked behind my head. I surmised, correctly, that the teenage girls we had spotted on our way in had finally persuaded their parents that it was perfectly acceptable to come over and see Tom now that he had finished his meal.

            They came over and stood beside me to talk to Tom “Ladies” he said a most charming smile on his face.

“Oh, Mr Hiddlest…. I mean Tom…, I mean…” the first girl trailed off, clearly star struck.

“Tom is fine” said Tom gently to them both.

The second girl piped up then, probably after gathering her courage “Could we please have your autograph Tom?” and she blushed as she said his name.

“I can do better than that if you have your phones with you?” Tom responded. Quick as a flash the girl’s phones were in their hands. “Now I’d like you to meet someone very special” he continued and gestured to me. He got up from the table and moved to stand on my free side. “This is Jackie, my fiancée and you are the first of my fans to see us together” I smiled shyly at the girls and they looked back at me in awe.

“Seriously?” one of them found their voice.

“Yes” I said and showed them my ring.

“Wow! Congratulations to you both” the other girl piped up.

“Thank you” Tom and I said in unison and smiled at each other.

“So Ladies” Tom continued “would you like to have the first fan picture of us, all of us if you like. I can grab the waiter to take the photos and I’ll do some selfies with you and an autograph. Is that OK?”

The girls nodded vigorously. As if on cue the waiter appeared and Tom pressed him into service as photographer. Luckily he didn’t seem to mind too much. Group shots taken Tom kept his promise and did the selfies, each girl getting a peck on the cheek from him which they probably wouldn’t wash off for as long as possible. He even managed to snag some hotel compliments slips from somewhere which he dedicated, signed and dated and presented them to the girls. They were over the moon.

“Just one last thing” Tom said to the girls as they made to leave “if you could wait until tomorrow to put them on social media we’d be very grateful, you see there will be a couple of press photographers outside when we leave and for a large donation to charity we’ve promised them the exclusive. As soon as you see the pictures of just the two of us you can post yours. Is that OK?”

“Sure Tom, that’s fine” they assured him “our pictures are more special anyway” they said goodbye and headed back to their parents. Tom looked at me “OK?” he said solicitously

“Surprisingly yes” I answered “they were sweet. I mean I’ve seen you with a few of your fans before but never close enough to hear. They love you to bits!”

“And I love them” Tom replied “but I love you more” and he leant down to kiss me chastely on the lips. The other girl in the room then came over and Tom did his spiel again. She also went away blushing at getting a kiss from her idol.


	53. Chapter 53

            Just then the maitre’d came over and told us our car was outside. Tom shot me a concerned glance “So you’ve had the starter” he said quietly referring to the fans in the restaurant “ready for the main course?” In answer I reached for his hand and gripped it, but not too tightly. He turned to the maitre’d and thanked him. Hand in hand we headed back through the restaurant and into the hotel lobby. I took a couple of deep steadying breaths and then it was outside into the London evening air. As Luke had said there were a couple of young girls with their phones and a few press photographers. The flashes were almost blinding as Tom guided me to the car. Lots of questions were shouted at us, all along the lines of who was I and where were we going. Tom ignored them all but smiled at everyone and I followed hid lead, plastering my best false smile on my face, determined not to let Tom down by looking miserable or even worse scared. Jeff was there to open the car door for us and I scooted over to the middle to give Tom room to get in. a few more blinding flashes and we were done, Jeff shut the door and I noticed for the first time that the car had tinted windows for which I was extremely grateful. We pulled out into the traffic and I let out a huge breath.

“You were brilliant Darling” Tom said, pulling me into a much needed hug “that wasn’t too bad, I’ve definitely seen worse. We’ll get Luke to put out a press release tomorrow I think, no need for speculation with the Elle interview coming out next month, and then everybody will know how happy we are”

“Sounds good” I responded, still trying to see properly after all of those camera flashes “in fact if I know Luke, he’s already got something prepared, just in case”

Tom thought for a moment “Yes, you’re probably right. Shall I text him now and let him know how it went?”

“If you don’t he’ll only worry” I said smiling slightly

“Yes” said Tom “and we can avoid that.” he busied himself with his phone as we travelled. He had to be quick because it was a relatively short ride to the theatre. In no time at all we had pulled up outside and I gasped as I had tickets for Wicked, a show I’d wanted to see for a long time but circumstances had dictated that I’d never gotten to, well that was obviously about to change! Tom took in the look of delight on my face and matched it with a beaming smile of his own. “I take it you approve?”

“Oh yes” I said, not quite believing where I was “however did Luke manage it?”

Tom chuckled “ehehehe, have you forgotten who you are engaged to Darling?!”

“No. I’m engaged to you Tom, silly!”

“Ah but tonight”, he said holding up a finger “I’m not just Tom, I’m Tom Hiddleston and you’d be amazed at the doors that will open, though I do try not to take advantage of it too often”

“Oh” I said, understanding dawning.

“Well we’d better go or else we’ll miss curtain up and as an actor myself that is something I definitely want to avoid” he smiled a soft smile at me and got out of the car, as usual he leant straight back in to help me out. We were met at the main door by an usher who had obviously been waiting for us. He greeted us with “Good evening Mr. Hiddleston, a pleasure to meet you, please follow me to your seats” Tom nodded politely and we followed the usher into the theatre. To my surprise we headed up a set of stairs off to one side and along a fairly narrow corridor with doors only on one side. Our usher opened the last door for us and we stepped inside. I almost gasped out loud again. We were in a box, to be precise we were in the box nearest the stage on the Grand Circle level, the view of the stage was amazing.

Tom smiled at me broadly “Is this OK Darling?” he asked, taking in the look of wonderment on my face. I wanted to hug him tight to try and express how happy I was but I realised that we were in full view of the auditorium and it would be very inappropriate. I settled for a large smile and squeeze of his hand. We sat on the padded chairs and, with five minutes to go, settled in for the performance.

            The show was… well… Wicked! The story was well told and surprised me because I thought that it was a prequel but it carried right on through to end of the Wizard of Oz story. I shall never look at that film in the same way again. During the interval our usher brought us drinks which were very welcome. I really did not fancy going to the Circle Bar to get them and if Tom had gone I’m not sure he would have made it back in time for the second half with all the young girls in the audience. I was fairly sure that we hadn’t been spotted; although my attention had been mainly on the stage I’d looked around enough to know that we didn’t seem to be attracting undue attention.

            At the end of the performance the cast got a standing ovation and took three curtain calls. I glanced over at Tom and wasn’t surprised to see him applauding as loudly as the rest of the audience, smiling widely. As the applause died down Tom sat back down again “If we stay here for a few minutes Darling, the main crowd will be gone and we can leave in relative peace. I know the object of tonight’s exercise is to be seen together but there is no need to make life difficult for the staff here.”

“OK” I acquiesced and sat down again watching the theatre empty steadily. After a few minutes the usher came to escort us back to the front door. The crowds had thinned considerably and we made it to Jeff with no incident. We got in the car and set off

“Where to Tom?” said Jeff with a big smile. I was confused, why wouldn’t we be going back to Tom’s place?

“Ah” said Tom, somewhat sheepishly “I haven’t actually told Jackie about that bit yet!”

“Told me about what bit!?” I said demandingly wondering what on earth more had been lined up for me tonight.

“Nothing to worry about Darling” said Tom placatingly “It’s just that. If you wanted, we could spend the night in the hotel suite? All of our stuff is there anyway and it’s been paid for, do you fancy a chance to see how ‘the other half’ live?”

I thought about it briefly. Lizzie was safe with Diana, there was a faint chance that there would be photographers at Tom’s if the story had broken a little earlier than we wanted it to, and the idea of a little bit of luxury was very tempting. “The hotel please” I said with a big smile that was immediately matched by Tom.

“There’s your answer Jeff, the Lady has spoken, take us back to the hotel please” chuckled Tom

“With pleasure Tom” replied Jeff.


	54. Chapter 54

            As we settled in the back seat of the car for the slightly longer trip back to the original hotel I nudged Tom on the arm “Have you told Luke where we are staying tonight?” I asked.

“Not yet” said Tom, “better had though” and out came his phone again. His fingers flashed over the screen and he was about to put it away when his Luke text alert went off. He read the message, laughed quietly and then showed me what Luke had written

Good call, there are a few more paps at the Ruben now, they must think you are staying there

I laughed quietly too, we should be able to get back into our hotel with minimum fuss now.

            When we returned to the suite Tom escorted me over the threshold and into the room. It was about 11pm and although I’d had a long day I wasn’t really tired. Tom rang down for hot chocolate from room service and then turned to me.

“What do you want to do Darling?” he asked as he pulled off his tie and shucked off his jacket.

“I don’t know really” I admitted “a shower would be nice and then I’ll leave it up to you I think”

“OK” he said easily “do you need a hand getting out of that dress?”

“Yes please” I responded “and can you undo my necklace whilst you’re there please?”

“Certainly Darling” he said with a smile as his dexterous fingers undid the clasp. As was becoming a lovely little habit, he planted gentle kisses on the nape of my neck. Leaving me holding my new necklace he lowered the zip on the back of my dress. He slipped out of my sight to retrieve the necklace box which he then put somewhere safe after I had placed my new jewellery in it. I went to the bathroom and tried to work out the shower controls. I couldn’t hear anything from the rest of the suite so I assumed Tom was changing out of his suit and then just relaxing whilst he waited for me to be finished. I had a relaxing shower, staying under the water until I felt the tension from the night dissipating. When I was done I got out and dried myself in the huge bath sheet and put on the light weight pyjamas that I found resting on the side. I smiled wide; this had all the hallmarks of a Lizzie and Tom ‘gang up’ on me again, trying to make me see that I should let other people take care of me occasionally. I was sure that if I’d asked to go back to Tom’s it would have been no problem and nothing would have been said by either of them to try and get me to change my mind, but I had opted for the hotel and was very much looking forward to it. I put on the fluffy bathrobe to leave the bathroom, not because I wanted to cover up but because I wanted to keep in the warmth I’d gotten from the shower.

            As I exited the bathroom I noticed the lights had been dimmed in the suite and I couldn’t see Tom anywhere. I called for him but there was no response. Just then I noticed a bright pink arrow on the floor and then another one on the wall a couple of feet away. I knew that they hadn’t been there before my shower so reasoned that they had to be something to do with Tom so I decided to follow them. The arrows led me into the bedroom and around the bed to a door in the far corner. I had assumed when I saw it that it was a cupboard but then why was there a pink arrow pointing to the handle? I opened the door gingerly only to be surprised by a gorgeous wooden spiral staircase and a series of pink arrows pointing upwards. The wood felt warm on my bare feet and I was glad it wasn’t made of metal. When I reached the top there was another door which I opened cautiously. I had no idea what I would see when the door was open, and what I saw took my breath away. I was on the edge of a rooftop garden complete with raised flowerbeds and tubs full of flowers that gave off a beautiful scent in the warm summer night. Surprisingly for London in summer the night was dry too. I looked around trying to spot a shadow that might be Tom; instead I saw more arrows, this time marked out with candles. The surface under my feet was not as warm and welcoming as the wooden stairs had been. Small stones digging into my soles, I made my way in the direction the arrows pointed, until I rounded a corner and stopped dead.

            In the glow of strings of fairy lights that had been arranged around an arbour I could make out two sturdy reclining sun loungers. They were covered with all the spare blankets and quilts from the room and there was a small table sitting to the side on which I could see two large mugs with steam rising from them. And then silhouetted by the lights, giving his hair a golden glow I saw Tom. My eyesight blurred as I fought back tears, no one had ever done anything so romantic for me before, on top of everything else that had happened today, even though it had all passed off well, I was overwhelmed. My steps faltered and I bit back a sob, I didn’t want to spoil whatever Tom had arranged.

            I hadn’t been quick enough to recover though; Tom had noticed me hesitate slightly and was by my side in a flash, pulling me into a warm embrace asking me to tell him what was wrong. I clung to him gratefully as I tried to get my tears under control. After a couple of big sniffs I managed not to cry in front of him though I was still unsteady on my feet. “Come on Darling” Tom said soothingly in my ear “you need to sit down before you fall!” He guided me towards the sun loungers which were close by. Two steps in though a particularly sharp stone pierced my bare foot causing me to wince loudly.

Tom stopped, concerned “Darling, what’s happened?”

“My foot!” I gasped “there’s a stone in it I think!”

Tom looked down at our feet, his still in his shoes from earlier on and mine bare “Silly goose” he murmured good naturedly “why aren’t you wearing anything on your feet?”

“I didn’t know I’d be coming outside after my shower” I explained “and there were none left by my clothes!”

Tom face palmed as comprehension dawned on his glorious visage “I forgot them” he whispered “I’m so sorry” with these words he swept me up into his arms and carried me the short distance to the chairs. Placing me down gently on one he used the light on his phone to assess the damage to my foot. “It’s not too bad” he said soothingly as he plucked the offending stone out of the sole of my foot. He gently brushed off the soles of both my feet and placed gentle kisses on them, causing me to giggle as it tickled.

“There, all kissed better” he said softly as he let go of my feet to place them on the lounger “and if they’re not then a hot chocolate should do the job” He smiled at me then, the smile of a child who’d just been told they’re in for a special treat, and I just had to smile with him. He really was just a big kid at heart and I loved to see that side of him. ‘Actor Tom’ was poised powerful and confident, ‘Romantic Tom’ was the sweetest man any woman could ever hope to meet, but ‘Real Tom’, the one only close friends and family got to see was the one who was with me now, smiling broadly at one last sneaky forbidden treat before America and food plans ruled his days, and he was the best of all.

            He lay down on the other sun lounger and spread the blankets and quilts over us making a lovely little cocoon. Carefully he passed me a hot chocolate, I was slightly worried that it would have gotten too cool to enjoy whilst it had been up here but the kitchen had thoughtfully put it in insulated mugs, not very stylish but perfect for keeping hot drinks hot. The rim of the mug was obscured by whipped cream and mini marshmallows which made drinking it without making a mess of our faces an impossibility and we giggled together as cream went up our noses and covered our top lips. We took a moment to admire the view. I hadn’t realised how central the hotel was, you could see the London Eye and Big Ben easily and many other buildings were lit up too, even the planes coming into land at the Docklands Airport added a certain something to the scene. Even with all the ambient lighting we could still make out some constellations in the clear summer sky. There was a sigh of contentment from next to me and I remembered suddenly reading an interview where Tom said that a nice meal and flowers were a good way to romance a woman but sharing a hot chocolate under the stars was good too (or words to that effect).

            I turned my head to look at him “is it as good as you hoped?” I asked quietly, not wanting to break the mood.

“Better” said Tom with a smile, “much better” knowing instantly what I was alluding to “in fact, I’d go so far as to say it was perfect” he reached for my nearest hand under the covers and held it lightly, twining our fingers together.

“Good” I said lightly, “I’m glad”

            It was still quite warm out, especially with the blankets and quilts on us and when the drinks were finished and the cups placed back on the table we lay under the stars for a while longer quietly, just happy to be in each other’s company, no words needed everything conveyed by the odd squeeze of a hand.


	55. Chapter 55

            Eventually we decided we should go down to the room again to sleep. Tom divested me of all but one blanket and trotted off downstairs with the rest after asking me to stay where I was. I wondered, not for the first time, what he was up to. I didn’t have to wait long to find out. I half expected him to come back with something to put on my feet but no, that was too easy a solution for my gallant fiancé as not for the first time I found myself scooped up in his powerful arms and carried towards the spiral stairs. For a terrible moment I thought he was going to try and carry me down the stairs but common sense thankfully prevailed and he put me down gently at the top of the staircase.

            Once we were back in the bed room we got ready for bed. I was delighted to find that the bed was just the right softness for it to feel like I was floating on clouds but not so soft that I couldn’t change position easily if I wanted to, and I was sure the pillows were actually marshmallows because they were beautifully soft and cradled m head perfectly. Tom was soon ready to join me in bed, he slipped under the covers and lay on his back laying his arm open, inviting me to sleep in my usual place. As soon as I was comfortable both of his arms came round in a lovely Hiddles Hug.

“You did so well tonight Darling” he whispered in my ear “I’m so proud of you. I know it’s not easy for you being the centre of attention at the moment, but it will get easier. You may even grow to like it.”

“Thank you” I said sincerely “and thank you for a wonderful night too. It was amazing and the photos were not really as bad as I thought they’d be, thought I didn’t particularly like all the flashes”

He sighed “I’m afraid that comes with the territory, it’s just something else to get used to” his voice was getting softer and I realised that he must be tired. The interview seemed so long ago and I suspected the whole day may have been as stressful for him as it had been for me as he wondered how I would cope with it all. My hand that was resting on his chest gave him a gentle squeeze and we drifted off to sleep.

The next day Tom was up before me as usual but obviously hadn’t gone for a run. He was trying to wake me up with soft kisses and gentle caresses, but the thing that did it most was the delectable smell of fresh coffee and bacon. I opened my eyes slowly and was greeted by the delicious sight of Tom, leaning over me just about to kiss me on the lips. Luckily for him he continued to kiss me even though he could see I was awake.

“Morning, Darling” he said softly “breakfast is here”

“I know” I giggled “the smell of coffee and bacon woke me up!” he feigned a hurt look “the kisses were nice too” I added quickly, and he smiled broadly and kissed me again for good measure. I got out of bed, put my dressing gown on and made my way to where Tom had set out breakfast. He’d ordered a full English for me and tea and toast for himself, mindful of his food plan. Breakfast was divine, everything seemed to be cooked just how I liked it and I was very impressed.

            When I had finished eating we tidied the plates away onto the trolley and Tom wheeled it outside the door of the suite and we went and sat on the sofa.

“So what are our plans for today?” I said curiously, remembering that Tom had said he wanted me all to himself for today, his last full day in England for a while.

“Well” he said “all I am prepared to say is we need to pack and check out, take our stuff back to ours and then…” he stopped mid-sentence. “And then?” I prompted

“I’m not telling you anything else” he said with a mischievous grin, so reminiscent of Loki. I was getting used to his penchant for surprising me now though, so I didn’t take exception. “OK” I said cheerfully and stood up to head to the bathroom. Once I was washed and dressed we packed quickly and I checked all the rooms for anything we may have missed. With our overnight bags in tow we left the suite, Tom taking charge of all three garment bags, in itself no mean feat. We checked out with very little fuss and made our way onto the street.

            Tom hailed a taxi and we headed home. On the way I got a text from Lizzie saying she was having a lovely time and being quite spoilt. I showed the text to Tom and he just shrugged as if to say < that’s my Mum!> I messaged Lizzie back telling her not to take advantage of Diana and Emma’s generosity and she replied assuring me she had no intention of doing that, but they were heading for Oxford Street later and if they got as far as the Lush shop she wouldn’t be responsible for her actions! We soon arrived at Tom’s and went in to drop off our bags. Tom advised me to get changed and when pushed for suggestions came up with ‘tight fitting trousers you can move in’ so I was none the wiser. He then told me to take only my phone as all treats were on him today. I started to protest but he put one long finger on my lips in a shushing action so I took the hint. I did however have to grab my Oyster card. We were changed and ready to go in no time and headed out to enjoy our day whilst it was still mid-morning.


	56. Chapter 56

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So originally this was meant to be two chapters but they were too short so I put them together, you lucky people :)

We strolled to the nearest Tube station and used the Underground to head to our destination. Tom still wouldn’t tell me where we were going and I still wasn’t familiar enough with London to be able to work it out on my own. I held Tom’s hand tight as we got off the train and headed towards our destination. We ended up at a horse riding stables, of all things, in the middle of London! I couldn’t believe it.

“You have ridden before, haven’t you Darling?” Tom asked.

“Yes” I answered, still coming to terms with the treat “but not for quite a while.”

“I’m sure you will be fine” he said reassuringly as we headed for the office and signs of life. A young woman came out of the office and saw to our safety needs, hard hats for both of us, of course, and made sure our footwear was sensible enough for riding. Fully kitted out we were introduced to our mounts. Tom’s was a beautiful bay mare named Katie and mine was a gorgeous black gelding called Lawrence. After putting us through our paces in an indoor school she pronounced us good enough riders to make the short trip to Rotten Row! I gasped audibly, Rotten Row in Hyde Park was somewhere I’d always dreamed of riding since I’d read about it when I was a young girl. Tom heard me and turned round in his saddle.

“I take it this meets with your approval, Darling?” he asked, although he already knew the answer, how could he not with my grin threatening to split my head open!

“Oh yes, thank you Tom, this is such a nice surprise” I gushed enthusiastically. Tom and the stable girl just smiled at me. Underneath me Lawrence started to move impatiently, my excitement transmitting to him. Luckily he calmed down as soon as we started moving and we walked sedately out of the yard and on to a quiet back street. I was surprised to see and entrance to Hyde Park at the end of the street and realised it must be one for local residents and the stables so that the horses would not have to cope with the heavy London traffic.

            Making our way from the corner of the Park to Rotten Row using designated horse trails was really fun, we walked a lot and trotted a bit where we could. When we got to the end of the Row Tom turned to face me “Ready for something a bit faster Darling?”

“Yes Love” I responded, adjusting my grip on the reins

“OK then” Tom said and nudges Katie into another trot, Lawrence followed willingly as Tom gave Katie the aides to canter. Katie responded immediately, Lawrence two strides behind and soon we were cantering freely along the Row. As Lawrence caught up to Katie I took the opportunity to admire Tom’s seat, he looked so natural on a horse and was a very good rider, being able to do the one thing I couldn’t, which was to keep his lower leg still. My lower legs always seemed to be flapping around of their own accord. Lawrence was soon matching Katie stride for stride Tom and I grinning madly at each other. We slowed down for the end of the Row and went into a walk. I was totally exhilarated about what I’d just done.

“Again?” I asked breathlessly

“Yes” nodded Tom and we turned round to head back the way we came. There was no one else on the Row or on the nearby paths so I urged Lawrence even faster this time and we managed a gallop, he lengthened his stride beautifully and we were actually out pacing Katie and Tom, though I could hear Tom urging Katie on to greater effort, to no avail though, Lawrence and I reached the end of the Row two lengths in front of Tom and Katie. As we walked the horses on the designated paths to let them cool down after their exertions Tom looked at me “You never said how well you could ride!”

“You never asked ‘how well’ you just asked if I could” I pointed out. His face was a study at my response

“Hmm, note to self” he said quietly “if you want Jackie to answer with specifics, you have to ask her specifically”

“Yep” I grinned “especially if withholding choice nuggets makes me look good”

“Darling, you always look good and not just physically, I don’t just love you for your looks you know?”

“I know” I said “and I appreciate it, I really do”

Tom glanced at his watch and frowned “It’s time to go back” he said a little glumly and he turned Katie and headed back towards the stables.

“We can do this again though?” I asked as I caught him up.

“Oh yes” he replied sadly “but it won’t be until next year now”

“Well” I said, trying to put a positive spin on his impending departure “that just gives us something else to look forward to.”

“Yes, it does” he said, giving me a small smile.

            When we reached the stables we dismounted and handed the horses to the stable girl. After returning our riding hats we wandered back to the Underground station and then back to Tom’s. He’d been packing slowly for most of the week but today was the day for the last flurry of activity and hunting for elusive items that had gone missing since the last time they were needed. I sat on the bed and watched as Tom finished packing, he was obviously used to this by now and managed to pack the bare essentials but still had enough everyday clothes and smart stuff to fill a large suitcase. He gently packed his guitar in its case and secured the clasps firmly. Two of his best suits were paced carefully in a suit carrier and then he was done

            I went to the kitchen and put the kettle on for a cup of tea. Drinks made we sat together on the sofa in companionable silence, neither one of us wanting to say what was on our minds. Suddenly Tom reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone, “Shall we?” he asked hesitantly. I shrugged.

“I’d rather get the first bit over with you but if you don’t want to I understand” I said.

“No” he said “we do the first lot together” and he turned on his phone. The various alerts chimed in a cacophony that lasted what seemed like forever but in reality was less than a minute.

“Blimey” I said “not sure if that’s good or bad!” Tom was scrolling through the emails until he found one from Luke, he opened it and we read it together. It was addressed to both of us and read:-

Tom and Jackie, press release done, you will approve, copy below. All seems good so far, mainly positive and good wishes, about as much negative as was to be expected (There’s always some Jackie, you can’t please all of the people all of the time, not even Tom manages that!) will keep a close eye on it and let you know of any major developments

Tom turned to look at me “Not too bad then, Luke seems positive” and he planted a gentle kiss on my lips “shall we see what people are saying?”

“OK” I said quietly, really not sure. Tom heard the worry even in those two little letters, he placed his phone on his knee and took both of my hands in his, the usual warmth radiating through my fingers

“Jackie” he said, using my name to let me know how seriously he was taking this “I don’t care if all my fans hate you, which they won’t” he added quickly when he saw me recoil slightly “I love you, and nothing will change that. I value my fans but they are not the most important people in my life, you, however, do come into that category and yours is the opinion I value over theirs.” With that he opened his Twitter app.

            I wasn’t really surprised when his notification count just kept going up. The news had obviously spread pretty quickly among his fans. As Luke had said there were many messages of congratulations mainly from fans but I noticed one from Chris Hemsworth and Robert Downey Jr. as well. There were some negative ones on there but I was astounded to see people standing up for us against the nay sayers. I was especially gratified to see the pictures that we had done inside the restaurant on Tom’s Twitter with a message from the girls underneath saying how nice we were ‘in the flesh’ as it were. Tom immediately replied to them, thanking them for not leaking the pictures and for their kind tweets. Then, taking a deep breath, he opened is laptop and typed his own name into the search engine. I think he was surprised at how may hits he got from just doing that but he focused on the news items. Most of the papers seemed to have gotten hold of the pictures of us taken leaving the restaurant and I was pleased to see that, contrary to my recollection of the night before I’d managed not to look too startled and smile nicely for the cameras. Tom, I noticed, looked proud and possessive at the same time, but then he was better at that sort of thing than me.

            Most of the papers that ran the pictures also ran Luke’s press announcement, which of course, named me but didn’t mention Lizzie at all. As we’d agreed no mention of a date for the wedding was in there and all in all it was just a nice little statement announcing our engagement. Tom shut down his laptop, looking pleased.

“So far, so good” he said happily

“Yes” I said, not knowing what else to say really.

As if sensing my unease Tom pulled me into a big hug “it will be alright Darling, you’ll see, Just remember what I said about my fans”

“I’ll try” I said trying to sound convincing. In reality I was still slightly worried. It was all going very well, even though, as far as the fans were concerned, it was very early days, and the Elle interview was not due out until the end of September. Fan speculation about us was sure to run rife, because of whom Tom was and I knew that lack of information would only lead to misinformation being bandied around as true. I trusted Luke to keep an eye on things though, even if it was only because it was in the interests of Tom’s career. I chided myself for being silly then. Luke had reiterated many times that he would look out for my interests too now as I was important to Tom. It was time for me to stop moping and worrying and trust that everything would be alright. Taking a deep breath I turned to Tom and said

“So what have you planned for the rest of the day?”

“Nothing really” he shrugged “I just wanted to spend all day with you uninterrupted by anything or anyone”

I raised my eyebrow and looked pointedly at his laptop still sitting on the table where he’d left it. Following my gaze Tom was quickly on the defensive “That doesn’t count” he pouted adorably “That was all about us!”

I held my hands up in surrender “I know, I know, but you can’t blame a girl for wanting to tease occasionally! I mean I’m not going to get a proper chance for a while.” And there it was again, the elephant in the room, the thing that neither of us was mentioning. Tom’s imminent departure for the States. I turned into his body and hugged him tightly, as if by holding on I could stop him going. He hugged me back just as possessively.

“I don’t like this part of your job” I said into his neck “but I wouldn’t dream of not letting you be who you want to be” I added quickly as I had a sudden thought that he might think I was asking him to give up all that he had worked so hard to achieve.

“Maybe one day you can come with me?” Tom said quietly

I thought about it for a minute “maybe I will when Lizzie is older” I said “we will have to see what life sends our way” and I smiled warmly at him.

Just then my stomach growled loudly and I blushed with embarrassment. Tom chuckled “Hungry Darling?” and then his stomach growled too.

“About as hungry as you I guess” I shot back. He giggled then as he checked his watch

“Hmm, how about an early dinner and then a night on the sofa with a good box set?” he suggested.

“Sounds like a good plan” I said “what are we having to eat?”

Tom grimaced “I’m on the diet plan, so I’ll have to have a look and see what I’m allowed, what would you like though?”

I made a snap decision “Make enough of whatever you’re having for two and we’ll share” I said.

“Darling, are you sure?” Tom queried “It’s all bland diet stuff. I could make you something tastier if you wanted”

“What a waste of time and money” I retorted “we had a lovely meal last night, probably far too many calories for both of us and I’ve had a big breakfast this morning so I’m absolutely fine with ‘bland diet stuff’!”


	57. Chapter 57

After checking the contents of the fridge we decided that grilled chicken breast with a green salad would be fine. Tom was still worried that it would be too tasteless for me so I grabbed his pot of dried mixed herbs and sprinkled some on the chicken as it cooked. Tom tended to the chicken as I sorted the salad. I shredded iceberg lettuce leaves with spring onions and cubed cucumber. I added a sliced stick of celery and some diced green pepper and then my secret ingredients when Tom wasn’t looking. Tossing the green salad in a large bowl I added a large teaspoon of sugar and a sprinkling of brown malt vinegar, mixing them in thoroughly. In a bit of brilliant timing the chicken and salad were ready at the same time. Tom wrinkled his nose when he saw the large bowl of salad, and only took a small amount, I took a great big heap because I loved the simple dressing I’d added and we tucked in. as soon as Tom had tried some of the salad he was serving himself a bigger portion.

“Nice?” I queried

“Delicious” he pronounced “I never knew salad could taste so good without a dressing”

I caved then and told him about the sugar and vinegar I’d used

“Wow” he said “really cheap, quite light calorie wise and really tasty. I hope they have vinegar in America!”

“It needs to be malt vinegar” I cautioned “no other sort works quite as well”

“Understood” said Tom “I wonder if I can smuggle a bottle in my suitcase?”

“If you protect it well it should survive the flight” I mused “it’s an easy way to get rid of ‘bland diet stuff’” and I giggled at him

“OK, OK” he huffed “Point taken, clearly I have no idea what I’m on about!”

“I wouldn’t say that” I replied trying to placate him “everything you have ever cooked for us has been lovely, you can clearly cook to a recipe, you just need to flex your cooking imagination muscles every now and again”

“I see what you mean” he said “cooking for one all the time can get boring and if I’m filming I can go weeks on end without cooking at all. When we are all back together again I must get you to give me some tips”

“Glad to” I said. The meal over we tidied away and I smiled to myself as the vinegar bottle disappeared into Tom’s suitcase. Feeling romantic we ditched the box set idea and found something else to watch instead. Bridget Jones seemed a good choice and we watched the two films back to back cuddled up together on the sofa, the odd soft kiss passed between us and our hands were constantly entwined. We were both dreading the next day and were determined to enjoy the few short hours we had left together. Eventually we went to bed and if we hugged a bit tighter than usual neither of us was prepared to say anything about it

            Morning was upon us all too soon. Tom forwent his morning run, reasoning that he would be doing plenty in America if his diet and fitness plan were anything to go by. I made us toast and coffee for breakfast and made sure that nothing perishable was left in any of the kitchen cupboards or the fridge. Lizzie and I were heading back to Wiltshire after Tom had departed and his flat would then be empty until he returned. He did say that if I needed to I was, of course, welcome to use the flat in his absence, but I’d already decided that it would be weird to be there without him before we were married.

            Lizzie, Diana and Emma turned up just before 10am and Tom was suddenly the centre of a massive group hug. Diana and Emma had seen him off on many occasions obviously but this time, somehow it was different. I couldn’t put my finger on why, notwithstanding the fact that Lizzie and I had never had to say goodbye to Tom for such an extended period of time but there was something in the atmosphere in the flat that was just ‘off’ somehow. I decided that maybe a hot drink all round would be the thing to break the strange mood and I went to the kitchen to put the kettle on. Tom followed me and put his arm around me as I readied cups and got the last of the milk out of the fridge.

“Are you OK?” he asked softly

I shrugged “Honestly, I don’t know. I’ve never been in this situation before and I don’t know what to expect, will I be able to fit back into my little life in Wiltshire or will I forever wanting to be in London? I really don’t know and I probably won’t for a couple of weeks, sorry”

Tom shushed me gently “No need to be sorry Darling, I haven’t had to leave anyone who isn’t family for ages and I think it’s going to be harder than I thought to be so far away from you and Lizzie for so long. However” and he smiled gently “it’s only until Christmas at the absolute latest and I’ll work hard to see if I can be home quicker than that. In the meantime I’m sure we’ll manage. Now is that kettle boiled yet I’m parched!” having successfully changed the subject Tom helped me to make tea and coffee for all of us and he carried the tray for me back into the living room. I missed the meaningful look Diana gave her son as he placed the tray on the coffee table so was totally surprised when he trotted to our bedroom with a jaunty “be right back.” He emerged holding two boxes, one was square, shallow and looked very old with a clasp holding the two halves of the lid together, and a smaller cube shaped box akin to a ring box which looked a lot newer.

            He handed the smaller box to Lizzie with a smile and a kiss on her cheek followed by “Thanks for all your help”. Lizzie opened the box and there, inside was a gold charm for her bracelet in the form of an acoustic guitar. She was speechless, which was a very rare event; finally she managed a heartfelt “Thank You” as Tom attached the charm to her bracelet. He then turned to me.

“I have something rather special for you Darling” he said as holding the shallow box in one hand he deftly opened the catch and lifted the two halves of the lid. Inside, nestling on a cushion of black velvet was the most beautiful necklace consisting of a gold chain from which hung a gold lozenge about 2cm long and ¾ cm wide. Set in the lozenge were five small stones all different colours. Putting the box down on the sofa Tom rose gracefully to his feet and extended his hand to pull me up as well.

“Before you say anything” he said with a knowing look on his face “it didn’t cost me anything, except to have it cleaned and the stone’s settings checked. I only got it back yesterday or else you would have had it sooner” he moved to stand behind me and continued to speak as he placed the necklace around my neck and fastened the clasp securely , placing the habitual kiss on my neck and the clasp as he did so. With Diana, Emma and Lizzie looking on he proceeded to explain the significance of the jewellery.

“The stones are, in order, Amethyst, Diamond, Opal, Ruby and Emerald. This is, in fact a rare early Victorian ADORE pendant bought by my four times great Grandfather Hiddleston as a gift to is wife on their 20th Wedding Anniversary in 1845. It has been passed down through the generations to the next Hiddleston bachelor on the death of the current wearer” he looked over at Diana and smiled apologetically. “It tends to skip a generation; Grandmothers pass it on to Grandsons mainly” his voice grew softer “I got it from my Gran Hiddleston. Before she passed she told me I must follow the tradition and only give it to the woman I would spend the rest of my life with, so it’s yours and you will pass it on in the fullness of time, many many years from now so that the line will remain unbroken” His voice grew slightly stronger again as he finished by saying “Coincidentally it also says how I feel about you. I do adore you and can’t wait until I become your husband” With that he gave me a long, lingering kiss, not caring that his Mum and sister were looking on.

            As he broke the kiss he spotted the inevitable tears running silently down my cheeks so he gently kissed those away too. Looking over at Diana, Emma and Lizzie I searched the faces of the two older women wondering what expression I’d see there. As far as I was concerned Tom’s gift to me of the Hiddleston pendant was more significant than my engagement ring and I was slightly worried about how it would be received by them. I needn’t have worried, both their faces were wreathed in smiles and before I knew it I’d been pulled out of Tom’s arms and into theirs.

“Welcome to the family dear” Diana said warmly “I knew that Tom had made the right choice as soon as I met you, I’m only sorry it took him so long to catch on!” the smile on her face left Tom in no doubt that she was only slightly teasing.

Emma piped up then “Yep, you’re stuck with us all now. I’m so happy I get a big sister and a little sister in one go. Way to go big brother”

The tips of Tom’s ears had gone quite pink by the time the Hiddleston women had finished and I realised that I’d been correct in my assumption that the pendant was way more significant to them than the sapphire currently residing on my left hand.

            Just then the intercom buzzed and the mood switched from joyful to sombre in a heartbeat. “That’ll be Luke” Tom murmured as if not saying it clearly made it less likely to be true.

“Yes” I sighed “you’d better answer it though, you know how he hates to be kept waiting” Tom dragged me with him to the door not wanting to be apart for longer than strictly necessary. His greeting to Luke was lacking in enthusiasm but Luke knew better than to take it personally.

“Hello Tom, Jackie” he greeted us “All ready to go?”

“Not really” said Tom with feeling “but if we must we must!” with him still holding my hand we went to the bedroom to get his luggage. After farewell hugs and kisses for the women staying behind and a ‘take care of your Mum for me’ to Lizzie we left. Jeff was downstairs as usual and he took Tom’s bags and put them in the boot of the car. Tom opened the rear door for me and I swallowed down the small lump that formed in my throat as I wondered when he would next do that for me again. He got in beside me and we sat as close as the seatbelts would allow. Luke rode in the front with Jeff.


	58. Chapter 58

            It was a very quiet ride to Heathrow. I certainly didn’t feel like making small talk and it seemed nobody else did either. In fact nobody said anything until we were on the approach roads and then Luke quietly told us what to expect. He’d invited a few more photographers this time and he warned that there may be a couple of reporters too. In a firm tone Luke said “No too long with any reporters Tom”

“Don’t worry” Tom replied “I’ll be courteous as always but Jackie is my priority today” turning to me he said “Darling, you don’t need to say anything if you don’t want to and you don’t have to smile either!”

I was grateful for his advice; this would be a huge challenge for me. I resolved not to cry in front of the cameras and reporters, but to keep my head up and look calm and serene. This was my world as well now, I had to get used to it. I was not going to be an invisible wife, if Tom wanted me with him and it was possible I would be there, braving the flashing cameras, shouted questions and, of course, the screaming fans.

            The car was suddenly at the Terminal drop off point, Luke quickly got out and opened the door for Tom and I. Tom got out and as always immediately turned back into the car to help me out. Doors shut Jeff drove to short stay parking, he would walk Tom’s luggage back, leaving us free of encumbrances to face the Press. As we walked the short distance to the terminal entrance Tom leaned down slightly and whispered in my ear

“Do you think you can loosen your grip slightly Darling? I may need to use my fingers at some point!” I flushed and mumbled an apology “It’s OK Darling, I know how you feel” Tom consoled me “but just a little looser would be great. You know I won’t let go until I absolutely have to”

I managed to make my fingers relax a little and was rewarded with a brilliant smile and the tickling sensation of Tom’s fingers wiggling gently in my hand “Thank you Darling” he breathed just a we entered the Terminal proper.

            We were met by a couple of airport security staff who explained that they would escort us wherever we needed to go. Tom thanked them gratefully which they brushed off with a ‘no problem Mr Hiddleston’ they escorted us towards the departure lounge and suddenly we were surrounded by photographers and reporters. Even with security there we had to stop walking “It’s OK” I heard Tom say to the airport staff “We have a little time to spare.” He let go of my hand but immediately transferred his grip to my waist instead, pulling me close. The photos started then, a myriad of flashes and a cacophony of calls and shouts all Tom’s name, of course, except for one woman who called my name! I think Tom and I were so shocked to hear that, that we both turned towards her at the same time. I hoped I was smiling, I’m sure Tom was, he was in full ‘Tom Hiddleston’ mode ‘Actor Tom’ to the fore, he glanced down at me briefly, a question in his eyes and I nodded ever so slightly. Tom then transferred his full attention to the reporter who’d bothered to remember my name. He answered her questions succinctly but fully (except for giving any details away about Lizzie or any forthcoming nuptials of course) and we even posed for a couple of shots for her before we returned to the middle of the main throng. Not surprisingly most of the questions were about Tom’s imminent departure and how he thought he would cope with the separation. Careful not to repeat exactly what he’d told Elle magazine only two days before, he said that he wasn’t really sure but with all the various forms of communication these days we should at least be able to talk two or three times a week, though we weren’t looking forward to the time apart we both knew this was a necessary evil. Reporters and photographers finally content we continued on our way. Tom kept his arm around my waist and I relished the close contact this gave us, especially as our time together could now be measured in minutes.

“You were brilliant Darling” he said proudly, a sentiment echoed by Luke on my other side

“You really were, tomorrows papers should be good read for you” Luke added

“I think I’ll let you send us the good bits, if you don’t mind” I said quietly

“Fine” said Luke gently “I’ll send it to the joint email?”

“That would be great, thanks” Tom responded as we approached check in. Airport security directed us to the VIP desk which was slightly off to one side out of the public gaze but I was sure there would be pictures of us all over social media the next day. Having checked in Tom was asked if he wanted a private room to say goodbye to me in before he had to go through the security barrier and so be out of reach. He replied in the affirmative with a gracious smile and we were shown to a small but well-furnished room.

Tom pulled me onto the sofa that took up one wall “OK?” he asked

“No, but I will be” I responded sadly

“I know” he said “I’ve seen your strength of character, you will be fine. It just might take some time. I’ll try and contact you as often as possible”

“You’ll phone me as soon as you’re through immigration” I countered sharply and then realised how snappish I’d sounded “please” I added quickly. I realised then that I’d left my new phone at Tom’s and I told him so.

“Never mind Darling, your normal phone will do for now and of course I’ll phone you as soon as I can after landing”

“Thank you” I said sincerely “I’m going to miss you so much!”

“Not as much as I’m going to miss you” he replied. He stood up and I went with him and he pulled me to his chest in a characteristically big hug, his forehead resting on mine for a long moment in a gesture that felt painfully romantic to me.

“I have to go” he whispered

“I know” I replied at the same volume

“I don’t want to”

“I know that too but you have to. Come on; give me a proper goodbye kiss here and then anything before security is a bonus”

“You’re always right about stuff like this” he said “how do you do it? You’re so good for me!”

“I don’t know how” I said I just say what I feel is right at the time”

“Well, don’t ever stop” he said and pulled me in for my goodbye kiss. It was tender, sweet and lovely, everything I wanted to remember about him in a single action. We broke the kiss after a few seconds; it had conveyed everything else we wanted to say but had no words for. Sighing softly Tom wrapped his arm around my waist once again and opened the door of the room. Luke was waiting outside, looking at us both, he didn’t say anything, just led us to the security barrier. I know I saw people with their phones out but I didn’t care. I was focused on not crying because I had a feeling that if I did Tom would never get on the plane and also because I didn’t really want pictures of me crying all over the net.

            When we got to the barrier Tom took both of my hands in his larger, warmer ones “I’ll see you soon, online” he said

“Yes” I said, barely above a whisper

“We’ll be fine” he tried

“I know” I said, no louder than before.

“Don’t forget me now” he said with a hint of a smile, though I could see his unshed tears.

I actually giggled a bit before I answered with all the sincerity I could muster “No chance!”

“Good” was his only reply he then leant forward to whisper directly into my ear “There’s a surprise for you on our bed when you get back”

He stood back up and with a sad smile he let go of my hands. Adjusting his hand luggage on his shoulder he clapped Luke once on the back and said goodbye to him, then turning to me I got another lingering kiss. I closed my eyes briefly and when I opened them Tom had just turned away and was walking towards the scanner. He turned around once more, gave me a small smile and sketched a wave, which I returned shyly, and went through security. I couldn’t watch him go so whilst his back was turned I resolutely turned to Luke and said “Let’s go”


	59. Chapter 59

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok I have potentially bad news :( My husband (Whom you may remember knows nothing about this fic) has been signed off work for at least two weeks and probably more thus severely curtailing my typing up opportunities. I will continue to post when I can but things may get a bit more sporadic. On a plus note this fic is a year old now and I still cant believe how it has gone. thank you to those who have stuck with me from the start and welcome to those who have found it recently. Now on with the story :)

Poor Luke did his best to escort me out of the airport without touching me anywhere Tom just had, but he found it impossible, settling for a hand in the small of my back, although I could tell he was more than little uncomfortable doing so. I gave him a small smile, trying to thank him and reassure him at the same time. I didn’t trust myself to say anything at that point without bursting into tears so I hoped he understood. Luke’s free hand was busy with his phone and I hoped that he was getting hold of Jeff as I just wanted to go home now.

            Jeff was indeed waiting for us directly outside the terminal. Luke opened the back door for me and I slid in. the car felt empty and far too large. This was the first time I’d been in the back on my own and I didn’t like it one bit.

“Front or back Jackie? Luke said and I realised he’d been talking to me and I’d practically ignored him.

“Sorry” I managed around the lump in my throat.

Luke smiled gently at me and repeated his question “Do you want company in the back or shall I ride up front with Jeff?” he clarified.

“Back please” I said and Luke slid in beside me. As soon as the car door was closed Jeff was pulling away from the kerb and smoothly out into the traffic. The moment I felt the car move I turned my head onto Luke’s shoulder and cried the tears I’d kept in check at the airport. Not knowing quite what to do he patted me gently on the shoulder and told me that everything would be OK, Tom would be back before I knew it and then we would be married. He was right, I knew he was right but it didn’t really help at that precise moment. Just then as if to add insult to injury my phone went off. I knew straight away who had sent the message even before I’d opened it

**Tom: Just about to board, missing you already**

_Jackie: Missing you loads too. Happy trails xxx_

So this was it, the moment I had been dreading in the back of my mind for so long was finally happening. Tom was off to another country, we would now have to contend with being further apart physically than ever before and time differences added to boot. I sagged against Luke again knowing Tom would prefer him to look after me as Tom’s friend than nearly anyone else right now.

            The journey back to Tom’s was silent but the atmosphere was not strained. Luke and Jeff just seemed content to let me be and didn’t try any small talk for which I was grateful. Arriving outside the apartment felt wrong somehow, even though I knew that Lizzie, Diana and Emma were there waiting for me the one person who should have been there was not. Luke escorted me up in the lift and only left me when I was safely back in the flat. He said a brief hello and goodbye to Diana and Emma but to Lizzie and I he said “I’ll be in touch soon”

“Thank you for everything Luke” I replied “I know I’ve not been brilliant today”

“Nonsense!” he replied “it’s the first time Tom’s gone away like this in your relationship, give it a few years and I’ll bet you’ll be glad to see the back of him!”

I giggled dutifully but deep down inside I doubted that would ever happen. I fingered the pendant lying on my neck and thought about how much Tom meant to me and I to him.

            I suddenly remembered the surprise in our bedroom and as soon as the door had shut behind Luke I headed there. In the middle of the bed were a small pile and a letter addressed to me in Tom’s distinctive handwriting. I read the letter first:-

Darling Jackie,

As you are reading this I am on a plane that is taking me further away from you every second and I already know I hate it, however much travel and time apart will always be a necessary part of our life together. I love you my darling Jackie, more than I thought was ever possible to love another person and I am already counting the hours until we can be together again. Until then the gifts on the bed will have to suffice. I will be wanting one of them back but the other is yours forever

All my love

Your Tom xxx

Through yet more tears that threatened to spill I looked at the gifts, one was wrapped in gift paper and one wasn’t. The one that wasn’t was Tom’s favourite running shirt that I knew he’d been wearing in the last week, he’d carefully folded it and placed it in two polythene bags to try and keep the aroma that is all Tom in for as long as possible. I picked it up and hugged it tightly to my chest before opening the bags just a crack to inhale the smell I loved so much, a heady mix of sweat and Tom’s own scent. Sealing the bags up carefully I turned my attention to the gift wrapped parcel. I could tell by the size and shape that it was a book and I thought I might be able to guess which one. Gently I removed the tape from the paper, wanting to keep the wrapping from the first gift wrapped present from my gorgeous fiancé.

            It was, as I’d suspected a hard back copy of The Red Necklace by Sally Gardner, the book I’d listened to and told Tom about the night of Lizzie’s birthday party and I knew now how he was going to keep me happy whilst he was away. Here was my bedtime story made real. I reverently opened the front cover to find, to my surprise that Tom had managed to get hold of a signed first edition. I appreciated the effort and thought that went into this gift. I’m sure it didn’t make it any more valuable to anyone else but me but I didn’t care. Another piece of Tom’s writing paper fluttered to the bed and I picked it up curiously, written in the same casual hand it said simply:-

Jackie

You may have already guessed but I have another copy of this book with me, so here’s the plan: - when I have the time you will have your bedtime story read to you just as you wanted. It’s not much but it’s the best I can do in the circumstances.

Forever Yours

Tom xx

He was wrong; it was everything I wanted, short of having him next to me in bed reading it. I suddenly realised that I’d spent longer in the bedroom than was decent. I placed the shirt and paper in my case and took the book and note with me, not wanting to let go of a precious link to Tom. As I entered the main room once again I realised that all eyes were on me and I felt really self-conscious. Lizzie was the first to speak, beating Diana by a fraction of a second.

“Are you OK Mum?” was her hesitant query

“No” I replied honestly “but I will be, I’ve come through much worse than this, but it may take a while. Tom got me this “I said holding out the book as much to change the subject as anything else. Her eyes widened as she read the title.

“Oh wow Mum, you’ll love that!”

“Mmm” I agreed “especially with who is going to read it for me!”

Diana chimed in then “That’s Tom, always the romantic” she had a wide smile on her face as she spoke and Emma nodded her vigorous agreement and added “though I’ve never seen him quite this …” she searched for an appropriate word “Smitten?” Diana supplied. “Yes that’s it “said Emma happily “he’s definitely smitten with you Jackie and I’m so pleased for you both. I can’t wait until February.” From where I was standing February looked too far away but I consoled myself with the fact that Tom would be home for Christmas and then, if Malcolm kept his word his schedule would be relatively free until March.

Diana drew me from my thoughts “On that subject, we need to find time for you to meet with Caitlin and Lucy, Tom’s cousins” she said “they live in Newbury so that’s about half way between you and us?” I nodded “How about I arrange a girl’s day out then, maybe get hold of a few bridal boutiques and have a shopping day?”

“That sound like fun” I said realising that planning my wedding would at least fill part of my time, even if it wouldn’t take my mind off my missing man too much.

“Great” said Diana “you let me know when you’re both free and I’ll arrange it”

“OK” I replied and then realised “I don’t have your numbers do I?” There was a moment of silence as they thought “I’m fairly sure you don’t have mine” said Diana and we quickly swapped details including email addresses. I gave Emma and Diana my personal email because if we were going to be discussing wedding dresses I didn’t want Tom getting wind of anything. Emma and I already had each other’s mobile numbers but I gave her my land line as well. I wasn’t surprised to see Lizzie and Emma swapping numbers too.

“Now” said Diana “are you staying here tonight or …” she trailed off, suddenly not sure how to finish that sentence. I looked at my watch, it was nearly 6pm. If I set off for Wiltshire now I could still get home at a reasonable time, traffic willing, and I suddenly decided that that as where I wanted to be. I couldn’t bear the thought of staying so soon at Tom’s without him there and so the cottage seemed the logical choice.

“If it’s all the same to you” I said hesitantly “I think Lizzie and I are going to head to the cottage, that’s where I want to be right now.”

“That’s fine” said Diana soothingly “I understand completely, however much you come to love somewhere else sometime all you want are your own four walls”

I nodded, glad that no offence had been taken. Now the decision had been made though I was desperate to start the journey. It was Emma who sensed the change in my mood “Come on Mum” she said “let’s leave Jackie and Lizzie to their final packing so they can get home”

“Yes, of course” responded Diana

Whilst Lizzie and I gathered together our remaining possessions, including my new phone and my precious book, Diana and Emma went round making sure that all non-essential electrical appliances were turned off. They both had keys and so did Luke so the flat would be looked after whilst Tom was away. We said our proper farewells in the flat, just because we could never be sure we wouldn’t be caught on a pap’s camera, and we all made our way downstairs, the luggage spread between us. A quick goodbye just inside the building lobby and Lizzie and I headed to my car, put the luggage in the boot and got in. I started the engine and we began the long journey back to Wiltshire and our lovely little cottage. There wasn’t much conversation on the way but Lizzie had spotted my new phone and had to comment on it. When I explained who it was from and what it was for she immediately christened it the ‘star phone’ reasoning that it was like a Stark Pad from the Iron Man films but better because of who would be on the other end of it. I agreed and the ‘star phone’ it became.


	60. Chapter 60

            Getting home felt really odd, we’d been gone a bare week but so much had changed in that short time. I had been officially revealed as Tom’s fiancée with a press release and at least two different sets of photos, one of which I hadn’t seen yet and I wasn’t sure I was brave enough to on my own. I consoled myself with the thought that Luke must have seen the airport ones by now and as neither of my phones were going off all must be well. As it was reasonably late Lizzie and I had stopped for fish and chips on the way home. We ate them out of the paper in the living room feeling rather naughty. Real life would reassert itself tomorrow with grocery shopping and laundry but at least there would be minimal washing up! Food all gone we settled down on the sofa, it still felt really odd without Tom there so Lizzie and I sat close, closing the gap between us. As I watched she got out her laptop and went straight to Google.

“What are you looking for?” I asked

“The photos, of course” she replied as if it should have been obvious “Emma and Diana wouldn’t let me look for any so I don’t know how pretty you looked Wednesday night.” Just typing Tom’s name into the search bar showed her everything she wanted to see. “Wow Mum you look so pretty” she exclaimed “and you managed to smile nicely too” she knew I’d been worried about Wednesday evening and the meal so it was good of her to allay my fears that I looked awful. Then she found the photos the girls in the restaurant had put online and asked who they were. I told her the whole story and she seemed pleased that it had gone so well.

            Next, of course came photos from that afternoon at the airport, as I’d suspected there were quite a few that had been taken by fans and posted on Twitter and Tumbler. We’d managed to look fairly casual, thought there were a couple of pictures where our emotions showed through. Someone had even managed to get a shot of our last kiss and posted it with the hashtag #sadTom. It had been retweeted a number of times already and although I’d promised myself never to read the comments, Lizzie had made no such commitment. I couldn’t look as she scrolled down but by the end she was smiling. “The fans seem to like you so far” she reported “anyone posting anything negative is politely told they are allowed their opinion but it’s not welcomed by the majority of Tom’s fans”

“I just hope they think the same after the interview comes out” I muttered

“You worry too much!” Lizzie retorted “You know Tom loves you, no matter what his fans think. Having them on you side is a bonus not a necessity.”

“I know” responded “deep down I know but it’s only natural to worry. There are an awful lot of Hiddlestoners out there!”

“And the two most important to Tom are sitting in this room!” Lizzie countered “now stop being so negative!”

I was shocked at this vocalisation of Lizzie’s maturity. I suppose I hadn’t realised quite how much she had grown up recently. Just then the ‘star phone’ started ringing. I looked at it trying to work out how to accept a call until Lizzie took it from me with a roll of her eyes swiped her finger across the screen and started speaking.

“Oh hello Luke”

“No, Mum’s here, right next to me, the phone flummoxed her, she’s never had a smart phone before”

“Yes I’ll take her through the important bits tomorrow. Do you want to speak to her now?”

“OK, see you soon I suppose” and she handed the phone over.

“Hi Jackie” said Luke “I’m sorry I didn’t realise you’d never had a smart phone before.”

“It’s no problem Luke” I replied “It never came up in conversation so I’m not surprised. Anyway what can I do for you?”

“Actually I was just checking you got home OK” said Luke a little sheepishly “I told Tom I would to stop him worrying too much”

“That’s very sweet of you Luke” I said smiling so Luke could hear it in my voice

“Just doing my job” he replied “Talking of which, when would be a good time to get together to go through details for the ‘meet and greet’?

“Well, if you want me to come to London it will have to be a weekend because of Lizzie and school, but if you want to come here any when is fine. I might even cook for you if you’re lucky!”

“I’ve heard about your cooking” Luke chuckled “I’m definitely coming to you then. Is Wednesday next week OK? We can get a proper presentation together that we can pitch to Marvel for their approval if we need to. I can be with you by 11am”

“That sound good Luke, you can stay for our evening meal and travel home afterwards if you want?”

“Great” he said “I’ll put it in my calendar.” Within seconds my phone made a discrete chime and I giggled “My phone’s just chimed. I guess that means it’s on my calendar too now”

“Yes” replied Luke “get Lizzie to show you tomorrow”

“Will do” I replied “well if that’s all Luke I’ll say goodbye. It’s been a long day and I can hear my bed calling”

“Yes. That’s all” said Luke “Goodnight Jackie”

“Night Luke, see you Wednesday” and we rang off.

            I grabbed both my phones and turned to Lizzie to wish her goodnight and not to stay up too long. She assured me that she wouldn’t and I headed to bed. I wasn’t sure I would be able to sleep without Tom in bed with me but I reckoned I was so tired, emotionally and physically that it might not be too much of a problem. I got ready for bed and slipped under the covers, before I settled down completely I opened the bags containing Tom’s shirt and inhaled gently. All at once the smell that was uniquely Tom assailed my sense and in my mind’s eye I could see him clearly, standing close to me having just come back from a run, hair sweaty, plastered to his head and this shirt with damp patches on it showing clearly how much he’d exerted himself. I felt suddenly calm, Tom’s scent doing wonders for my stress levels that I hadn’t really registered as being there until they dissipated. He loved me, I knew that and he would come back safe from America to reclaim his shirt.


	61. Chapter 61

            I must have dozed off at some point because the next thing I heard was a melodic chime coming from the ‘star phone’. My heart sank. It could only be Tom trying to contact me and I didn’t know how to work the stupid thing! He was going to think I didn’t want to speak to him and then he would worry and I didn’t want that. The chiming stopped and I held my breath, wondering if it would start again. Thankfully Tom’s ringtone came through on my own phone and I rushed to accept his call.

“Darling, are you OK” he said without preamble “Why didn’t you accept my FaceTime request?”

“Oh, is that what it was?” I said in a very small voice “I’ve never had a smart phone before so I don’t know how to use one yet. I’m so sorry”

He let out a sigh of relief “That’s OK Darling. I didn’t realise. Can you get Lizzie...”

“Lizzie to show me tomorrow?” I finished for him giggling “Luke has already tasked her with teaching me”

“Ok then” said Tom and at last I could hear him smile “where’s your laptop Darling?”

“Downstairs” I replied “Why? Do you want me to go and get it?”

“Yes please” was the response “I need to see you and I know you can Skype!”

“Cheeky!” I muttered down the phone as I got out of bed and padded downstairs to get my computer. “Got it” I said as I retrieved it from its carry case. “Now what?”

“Back to bed please Darling” Tom said easily “bed time stories only work if one of the participants is in bed”

“Where are you anyway?” I asked as I trudged back upstairs

“Three hour layover in Chicago” was the response “The V.I.P lounge is very nice! I’m going to grab a drink soon but you come first. How are you?” he said, changing the subject.

“Oh, you know” I replied as I reached my landing “missing you terribly already but apart from that OK I suppose.” As I finished the sentence I reached my bed. I rearranged the pillows on Tom’s side so that I could rest my laptop on them and turned it on. As we waited for it to boot up we exchanged small talk about how Tom’s flight had been and how much further he had to go.

“It’s only three hours once I take off again” he broke off “hey you’re online now!”

Immediately he was calling me on Skype. As soon as he could see me his whole demeanour changed and he was bright and breezy Tom, all smiles and laugh lines and so, so far away.

“There you are” he said softly “still beautiful” I blushed at his words “and still blushing!” he continued cheekily.

“Stop it” I said quietly “You’ll make it worse”

“I know” he said, with a glint in his eye “but you know I love you like this”

“”What? Permanently embarrassed?” I responded “Gee. Thanks!” the sarcasm dripped off those last two words.

“Sorry Darling” he said contritely “I didn’t mean to upset you”

It was my turn to speak softly “I know. I’m sorry too; we’ve both had a long emotional day. I’ll try not to let it happen again.”

“You’re forgiven, utterly and completely” was the response.

“And you are too” I said, smiling gently at the image on the screen.

            Then in another complete change of tone he said briskly “Time to settle down for your story time Darling”

I scooted down under the covers and made sure that I could still be seen and of course, see via my laptop. He opened a paperback copy of The Red Necklace and began to read “The Red Necklace by Sally Gardner read by Tom Hiddleston” I giggled as he quoted the start of the audio book that I knew so well. “This is Paris” he continued ignoring my interruption “here the winds of change are blowing…” Hearing his mellifluous voice read, once again the word of one of my favourite pieces of his work relaxed me and I shut my eyes. Tom continued to read for a while until he could hear my breathing settle into the slower rhythm of sleep. The last words I heard I heard him say was a very tender “Goodnight Darling, I’ll ring you when I get to Nashville” and then the sound of a kiss blown in my direction. I was too deep asleep to be able to respond properly but it was such a beautiful moment the I just had to let him know I’d heard it so I smiled and sighed loudly. He chuckled and terminated the call.

            I slept soundly until just after 6am the next morning when my phone rang again.

“Hello?” I said sleepily

“Hello Darling” replied Tom “sleep well?”

“Yes, thank you. How was your flight?”

“Fine thanks, just picked up my luggage and heading for arrivals, it’s just about midday here. I had a snack on the plane but I’m starving and can’t have anything to eat!”

“Oh poor you” I said sympathetically “It’s going to be like auditioning for Thor but in reverse”

There was a prolonged groan from the other end of the phone “Don’t even think it!” said Tom “I’ll manage fine, I hope, but I’m already looking forward to Christmas!”

“Just take one day at a time and please be careful. I don’t need you damaging your health” I said.

“It’s OK Darling. I’ll be well looked after, just permanently hungry. Anyway, got to go. I can see a sign that must be for me, it says ‘William Thomas’ on it!” he giggled and I chuckled “We still need to work on that I guess.”

“OK Love, bye bye then, will you phone tonight?”

“I hope so Darling, if not I’ll text or email you just to let you know I’m OK”

“Alright, I look forward to communicating with you later then” and I blew a kiss down the phone.

“By Darling, speak soon” was the response followed by his own kiss back at me and then he was gone. Feeling sadder than I thought I would I rolled over and tried to go back to sleep for a couple of hours. I was no early bird and had nothing to do that wouldn’t wait a couple of hours.

            When I woke up again I decided it was time to start my day, going downstairs I emptied the cases we’d dumped in the living room the night before and made a start on the laundry. The weather looked set fair for the day so I’d be able to get a lot done. Grocery shopping came next and I had to stop myself buying things for Tom, he hadn’t managed to convert me to many of his favourite foods yet so I almost always buying things especially for him. Returning home I put the shopping away and continued with the laundry. Desperately wanting something to do that wouldn’t remind me of the man missing from my life I dug around in the spare room until I found my cross stitch supplies. It was a hobby I’d taken up and stopped a couple of times now and it looked like it was time to take it up again. I found a nice big kit that would occupy me for a few weeks, grabbed a hoop and my good scissors and went downstairs to get started. The hours sped by and before I knew it, it was mid-afternoon. I’d been so engrossed in the sewing that I’d even forgotten to have lunch so I made myself a quick sandwich and a cup of coffee. Lunch over I sat back on the sofa and resumed sewing. Lizzie had gone out for the day, catching up with her friends and the cottage felt too quiet and empty with just me on my own so I put the television on, I’d long ago perfected the art of listening to programmes, only raising my eyes to the screen when it sounded like it was getting interesting. My sewing was growing slowly but surely and I was impressed with the progress I was making after such a long time not doing any.

            My contemplation was interrupted by a text from Tom telling me to check my emails. I did so and found that he’d sent me pictures of the house he was staying in for the next few weeks whilst he perfected his role. He was staying with Country singing legend Rodney Crowell and is wife, Claudia Church, in Nashville to hone his singing and playing as much as he could. They seemed to live in a large house set in its own grounds. One of the pictures was obviously of Tom’s room for the duration; it had a large bed and looked very comfy. All in all it looked really lovely and I replied to the email telling him so. Not surprisingly almost as soon as I’d sent the mail my phone was ringing. It was Tom of course and we spent almost an hour talking about our respective days.

Tom seemed pleased and interested when I told him about my cross stitch, glad I suppose that I’d found something to occupy my time with. I also told him I planned to check out the florists on the list from Leanne at Eddington Court and asked him about how we go about keeping it as quiet as possible. He suggested just using the ‘William Thomas’ alias for now and to talk to Luke about it when I saw him on Wednesday. I didn’t need to ask how he knew I was seeing Luke; I supposed it had come up on his phone calendar too. Lizzie came home towards the end of our conversation and Tom insisted on a quick chat with her as well. After a brief conversation the phone was handed back to me for goodbyes. Tom apologised because he wouldn’t be able to read to me that night as he was too tired to which I responded that he was being silly and I didn’t really expect to be read to every night, once in a while as a nice treat would do. We finally rang off and Lizzie immediately taught me how to use the ‘star phone’, just the basics she thought I’d need, phone calls and texts obviously and how to use a few of the apps. I text Tom in triumph and even replied to the congratulations he sent back. It was now time to eat so I made us a late meal which we ate in front of the television. I did some more sewing and then called it a night and went to bed.


	62. Chapter 62

            Wednesday came around quickly. I had decided to make a lasagne for our evening meal as it was something that could be prepared in advance and then popped in the oven for final cooking when we were ready to eat. I made sure the dining table was clear of its usual clutter so we’d have somewhere to work and waited for Luke. He arrived bang on time looking the most casual I’d ever seen him in just jeans and a T-shirt. I invited him in and made us both a coffee and we got to work. Luke had done some basic preparation and had a Power Point presentation to show me. I read it through carefully and was really impressed. He seemed to have covered most of the angles but I could also see how he’d left gaps for my input. We needed to show Marvel why this was such a good idea from a fan point of view, so I stressed the difficulties of getting to London from such a rural location, citing the high cost of transport to the capital and the cost of accommodation when there as reasons why fans such as Lizzie and myself would find it difficult to attend Premiers and get to see our favourite movie stars. Premiers also seemed to be held mid-week so school the next day was also an issue for parents. Having the meet and greet over two evenings before the wedding would ensure that the maximum number of people could attend, and we wouldn’t be taking up any more of our stars precious time as they would already be staying at the hotel so minimising any disruption to ongoing filming. All the proceeds would be going to Tom’s preferred charity UNICEF so it wasn’t even a profit making enterprise.

            Before he left for the States Tom had sent an email from our joint account outlining my plans for those two evenings to his fellow stars. I decided to check the replies whilst Luke was there so that he would know first-hand who thought it was a good idea. We could also use those names to our advantage if Marvel decided to be awkward, although I didn’t think they would be, brilliant publicity for the Avengers franchise at very little cost and effort to themselves, they’d be mad to say no! Logging on to the account I was delighted to see a full inbox. It had been less than a week since we posted the invites and we had a load of electronic replies. Robert Downey Jr. was a ‘yes’ along with his family and up for the meet and greet too, Mark Ruffalo likewise. Chris Hemsworth had replied even though we already knew he was a definite. Lizzie would be pleased to know that Scarlett would be there too. Luke, skimming quickly down the list, suddenly looked at me and giggled “It’s going to look more like a crèche than a grown up wedding!”

“What do you mean?” I asked perplexed. He was quiet for a moment, trying to remember the details, but then he spoke “if everyone you invited from show business bring all their children, and let’s face it you haven’t said it’s adults only and nor would I expect you two to” you’re going to have six children under 5 to cater for and four more children under 10, and that’s just the ones I’m sure about!”

I looked at him shocked “Are you sure?”

Luke returned my gaze squarely “90 per cent certain, there must be something about being an Avenger!”

“What are we going to do!?” I gasped

“How about we ring Eddington Court now, explain the situation and see what they can come up with? Then you can email the parents and see what they think.”

“Good idea” I said and reached for my own phone. I managed to get through to Leanne and explained our dilemma. She took it all in her stride and asked me to give her 24 hours to see what she could come up with. I readily agreed and we rang off. I composed a quick email to Tom letting him know of developments and asking him if he had any answers to our predicament. Glancing at the time and calculating the time difference I wasn’t expecting a reply straight away but I got one. It was short sweet and to the point < get Luke on it, he’ll know what to do!> I laughed out loud and showed the message to Luke, who just groaned “He doesn’t pay me enough!”

I chuckled “I’ll have a word if you think it would help?”

Luke smiled back “I’m good; really, he just seems to think I’m some sort of miracle worker”

“You are” I said honestly “You keep Tom on the straight and narrow”

“True” he agreed and we both laughed again. Then Luke, ever the organiser, started a spreadsheet for the wedding with who’d been invited, if they’d replied yes or no and the number of people in the party, including children. For him it was the work of minutes, for me it would have taken ages. He then created another file on my laptop called M&G and told me I could put anything in there that came to mind pertaining to the meet and greet just to keep it all in one place.

“How are we going to get the word out on this?” I asked

“Now that you can leave to me” said Luke with a smile “I’ve got some ideas and when they’re more polished I’ll let you and Tom know.”

“OK” I said simply

Just then Lizzie came home from her first day back at school and she was very excited about something. “Hello Luke, Hello Mum, I had the best day at school today”

“Why, what happened?” I asked

“Oh, some of my friends saw those pictures of you and Tom from last week; recognised you and so wanted to know if it was true that you were dating him and what he was like?” Luke stiffened slightly next to me “I told them it was all true, that you were engaged to Tom and that he was very nice”

“And that was it?” queried Luke sharply

“Yes” said Lizzie with a hint of exasperation “You know Luke; I knew Mum and Tom were an item before anyone else. If I’d blabbed at school none of the interview stuff would have been needed. I love Tom and I love my Mum, I’m not about to jeopardise their happiness.”

Luke looked suitably contrite “I’m sorry Lizzie. I’m not used to people keeping things about Tom to themselves”

“Apology accepted” said Lizzie happily.

“It does bring up a good point though Luke. How are we going to keep the wedding tradespeople quiet? I know Leanne will take care of most of the arrangements so that should be pretty anonymous but there is stuff I want to do myself. I want to pick the florist and talk to the photographer this week and we will need a wedding cake. The stationery wasn’t a problem as that came to me before all the pictures came out, but someone somewhere may recognise me now; put two and two together and then the cat will be out of the bag so to speak.” I said worriedly.

Luke thought for a moment “OK, here’s what we’ll do. You go and see who you need to see and when you’ve chosen who you’re going to use let me know and we can go in together with a Non-Disclosure Agreement for them to sign. You can use the ‘William Thomas’ alias for now, we’d better set him up an email account too, just as a precaution, don’t give out your joint email to anyone who hasn’t signed a NDA. OK?”

“OK” I said as Luke hastily set up an email for ‘William Thomas’ that Luke and I could both access.

“Right, now all tradesmen stuff can come to William and all guests can continue to use your joint account. Eddington Court already know Tom is Tom, yes?”

“Yes” I said, “they were quite shocked actually”

“Do you think they’ll say anything?” asked Luke.

I shrugged “I don’t know. It’s been booked about three weeks now, before the interview was done and I don’t think the venue is in the public domain yet”

“No, it’s not, thank goodness” said Luke

“If you’re worried” I said “we can make an appointment for you to meet them. It’s a god idea anyway because then you’ll know what we’ve got to work with for the meet and greet”

“Good point Jackie” replied Luke “it won’t hurt even if we don’t get the go ahead, although I’m fairly confident we will. I have a video conference set up with Kevin Fiege and their head of marketing next week. I don’t think I’ll need you but if I do we’ll Skype?”

“Yes that’s fine” I said airily but inside I couldn’t believe it. Kevin Fiege! The man partly responsible for Tom being where he was in his career. “Just let me know roughly when so I can make sure I’m not busy”

“No problem” said Luke.

            As it was approaching the time for our evening meal I preheated the oven in preparation for the lasagne, and when it was hot enough I popped the dish in to cook. Whilst it was cooking I prepared a salad and dressed it in the sugar and vinegar mixture I had introduced Tom to, smiling at the memory of his face at his first mouthful. Whilst the lasagne was cooking, Luke and I went over some wedding details and ideas. I said I wanted the celebrities interspersed with us ‘ordinary mortals’, as I’d taken to calling the friends and family who weren’t involved in the entertainment industry, so that they would have to mix, not for the benefit of the stars, I’d met them enough by now to realise that they would be OK with it, but for people like my friends and those of Tom’s who weren’t in show business and could very easily be ‘star struck’ at meeting someone they’d only seen on screen. I also thought about having a big party on the Friday night instead of separate Stag and Hen parties, not that I didn’t trust the boys, but I didn’t trust them not to do something silly. I’d heard the stories of the pranks they’d played on each other whilst filming and I didn’t want a repeat performance from anyone. It would also give people a chance to meet each other and forgo the need to have major film stars taking over the nearest bar outside the hotel, thus helping to keep everything relatively low key. As I explained all this to Luke he stopped taking his brief notes and ended up just looking at me oddly.

“You really have thought all this through haven’t you?” he said

“A little” I admitted

“A little!” he scoffed “I’ve been to less well organised press conferences than what you have just proposed to me. Tom was right, you really are special.”

It was my turn to scoff “No I’m not. I just like to think things through so I can be prepared for any eventuality”

“Well, whatever you call it, it’s worth keeping up” said Luke

Just then the oven timer went off, announcing that our evening meal was ready to eat. I called Lizzie and we went to the kitchen to eat around my farmhouse table. Luke hummed appreciatively around his first mouthful.

“Another thing Tom was right about” he said “this is delicious”

“Thank you” I said

The meal over Luke helped clear away the dishes and then excused himself; he had a long journey ahead of him and the next day would be a busy one.


	63. Chapter 63

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's a short chapter this week but hubby is still home and I can't catch up at all, so I don't want to post so much that I run out of typed up stuff. Hopefully he will be back to work soon and then we'll be up and running again on our normal schedule

            After Luke had left I composed an email to Tom outlining some of the things we’d discussed and suggesting the Friday night as a party night. I also told him about the William Thomas email account for all the tradespeople connected with the wedding. I wasn’t overly surprised when a Facetime request came in on the ‘star phone’ not much later and I eagerly accepted it. The phone screen immediately filled with the most gorgeous face on the planet, beaming away at me.

“Everything went OK then?” he said cheerfully

“Yes” I said and proceeded to fill him in on developments and ideas. He liked the idea of mixing celebrities and ‘mortals’ together at the wedding, giggling at my nickname for our non-famous friends, He also liked the idea of the party the night before, mind you I had come to the realisation that for Tom to turn down the chance for a party was a very rare occurrence indeed.

“That all sounds really good Darling, just let me know if you need anything done from here OK?”

“Will do Love, do you know anyone that can do calligraphy for the place names?”

“Not off the top of my head” he responded “I’ll keep my eyes open on set though, there may be someone with hand writing pretty enough for us”

“OK. Thanks. Have you seen the replies so far?” That innocent little question led to a fifteen minute, very one sided conversation about how good it would be to see all his Avenger friends again. He then wondered if the cast of Sherlock would like to be involved in the meet and greet and I said I didn’t see why not as all the main protagonists had been invited anyway. Tom said he’d ask Ben and if Ben was amenable, he’d be the one to ask the BBC on our behalf, just a Luke and I were doing with Marvel. That sounded like a good idea to me as I wouldn’t have known where to start. Wedding stuff done we talked about our day for a while longer and then he had to go. We said our goodbyes and rang off.

            The next day I headed off to a local town to a well-respected independent jeweller. I’d had an idea of what I wanted to get Tom as a wedding present and realised that they would also make very good gifts for the Best man and the Ushers too. I was going to commission four sets of cufflinks, I’d seen the design I wanted on an antiques programme before I met Tom and now they seemed like the ideal gift. All the cufflinks would be just over a centimetre round, metal with a thick-ish edge and a circular boss in the middle. There would be a recessed area that would be ideal for enamelling. I hoped they’d be stunning. Tom’s would be gold for the rim and the middle and dark green enamel, for Loki obviously. Chris’ would be silver and red for Thor, Ben’s would be gunmetal grey with purple enamel signifying Sherlock and his ‘purple shirt of sex’, and Martin’s would be gunmetal grey again but with pale blue enamel. If the boys wore black suits with a straight tie and pocket square in their respective colours I’d have the most colourful set of men but they’d all still look the same. I told the jeweller what I wanted and he said it would be no problem to do. He asked when I wanted them for and I said late January, hoping to throw him off the actual date if he put two and two together. I also gave him the ‘William Thomas’ email address for any queries.

            Returning home I studied the list of florists the Leanne had given me and browsed their websites. Some I dismissed out of hand as they just did not look good enough and I made appointments to see the others by the end of the week. That done I contacted the photographer Tom had picked out of the supplied list and made an appointment with her to see her portfolio and discuss ideas for poses. Satisfied with my days’ work I then spent ten minutes trying to get all my appointments onto my ‘star phone’ calendar! I did get there but it was a bit of a struggle! When Lizzie came home from school we checked I’d sorted out my appointments properly and then went about our evening.      Tom phoned late evening which was lovely as he had the time to read to me some more and I drifted off once again to the soothing sound of his voice.


	64. Chapter 64

            Life continued on at roughly the same pace, tradesmen were confirmed and the biggest news was that Marvel and the BBC both said they didn’t have a problem with the ideas for the meet and greet which was brilliant, they’d also both offered advertising media to decorate the place with. Luke and I were very happy. I hadn’t been needed for the Skype call with Marvel in the end, Luke had done a fantastic job but I did get an email from Kevin Fiege congratulating me on my forthcoming marriage and expressing the hope that I could keep the ‘God of Mischief’ under control! I replied, thanking him very much for allowing us to do the meet and greet and for the advertising merchandise they were going to supply. The biggest shock of the first two weeks was when footage of Tom playing at the Wheatlands Music Festival appeared on-line! Luckily for Tom it also appeared in my inbox but he only beat the fans by a couple of hours! I thought he was really good and very brave to get up on stage, with the minimal prep he’d had, and sing country songs to country fans, and I told him so in my reply to his mail. I showed the video to Lizzie when she got home and she pulled his performance to bits saying his fingering was all wrong and why wasn’t he doing what she’d taught him? She also criticized his singing, which I had thought was quite good, saying his phrasing was wrong and he was singing it ‘too English’ I suggested that she email him her better comments but asked her to bear in mind that it was his first time doing that in front of an audience and he’d only been in America working with Rodney for a week. I also reminded her that Rodney had been involved in this music genre an awful lot longer than she had and Tom was wise to listen to him. She did see my point and in the end the email she sent was a lot less harsh than it could have been. Tom was gracious in his response to her, which she happily showed me when it arrived, thanking her for her comments and saying he’d take what he could on board. He took just the right tone with her and it was just more evidence for me that he would be a really good step-dad to her.

            The only other thing of note that happened before my birthday was the trip to Newbury to meet Tom’s cousins and to have a nice day trying on gorgeous dresses. We met Diana, Emma and Susan, Tom’s first cousin, and the girls, Lucy and Caitlin easily enough and Diana took charge but in a really nice way. I was pleased because I didn’t have a clue where any shops were or what we were looking for in any detail. Elsa and India couldn’t make it but I’d promised to send them pictures of the chosen styles so that India’s dress would blend in. We’d already decided that India’s dress would not have to match any of the others and it was more important for her to have a dress that she could be comfortable in and that fitted so it seemed pointless to buy her a dress this early. That would be a fun trip in the New Year I decided.

            We had lots of fun trying on dresses. It was quite easy to find dresses for Lucy and Caitlin; we chose a lovely mid green for their dress and even managed a vaguely mediaeval look to fit the Loki theme; however Lizzie and Emma were harder to satisfy so we held off buying them just then. As for me, I tried on loads of lovely gowns but none of them were quite ‘the one’. We were getting quite disheartened when we happened to walk past a shop that seemed to specialise in bridal fabrics and I had an idea. Turning to the rest of the group I excitedly told them of my epiphany.

“Because we’re having trouble finding dresses that blend styles with each other why don’t we have them made?” I rushed out “think about it, if we buy three patterns and find three dressmakers then all our problems could be solved. Lucy and Caitlin could have their dresses made here in Newbury, Emma could have her dress made in London and Lizzie and I could have our dresses made in Wiltshire. Fittings for all of us would be a lot easier as we’d only have to worry about our own little groups, but all the rest could be done together. I bet shoes are easier to find then dresses. The only problem I can see is making sure that Lizzie’s and Emma’s material match but that should be easy to overcome.”

Diana looked at me thoughtfully “It could work” she mused “it would definitely be easier and less travel because I suspect after Tom is home at Christmas you two will be very busy together ironing out details and your weekends will fill so quickly you won’t believe it. Yes I think you’ve got a good plan there Jackie, shall we pop here and see how feasible it is?” We all trooped into the fabric shop which was, as I’d hoped, run by a dressmaker who specialised in weddings. When I explained our predicament she was all too willing to help, to the extent of selling us fabric for Lizzie and Emma even though she herself would not be making their dresses. The hardest bit was finding a pattern that could be adapted so as to look perfect on all of us, taking into consideration the ages of all involved. Mine, of course would be the most elaborate even though I wanted quite a simple style of dress and then Lizzie’s and Emma’s would be slightly plainer and in dark green, Lucy and Caitlin would be of a younger style again in mid green and India’s dress, when we got it would be in spring green. It didn’t bother me one little bit that green was supposed to be an unlucky colour, greens I wanted and greens I was having, although my dress itself would not be green. It couldn’t be white as I’d been married before so I actually wanted a very pale gold to continue the theme.

We then started perusing patterns, trying to find one that would cater for all of us. That took a bit longer ‘meringues’ were out as I didn’t want a huge skirt and figure hugging dresses were out because I didn’t think they would look appropriate on the younger girls. We narrowed it down to three in the end and then had to decide, they all had a fitted bodice, one had a small Medici collar, one had a sweetheart neckline and the third one had a normal rounded neck, because another thing the dress had to have was shoulders, I wasn’t a fan of strapless dresses. I really liked the look of the Medici collar one; it was another nod to Loki because all of his armour and dress clothes seem to feature a stand up collar. It looked like the collar would reach just below my hairline which, as I still intended to wear it short would suit me well. The skirt of that was floor length with a medium length train at the back but was not tight with flowing folds of fabric all around. The sleeves were skin tight from my shoulders to my elbows and then gently widened and dropped so that by my wrist the opening was about 6” from the top to the base. It looked perfect and the lovely dressmaker assured me it would be no problem to adjust it slightly to accommodate all of us. Lucy and Caitlin would have no train and tight sleeves to their wrists. Emma and Lizzie would have a small flare of material at the back, just enough to drag on the floor a bit and the plain sleeves. The dressmaker quickly sketched the two variations that we needed for the bridal party, two of which she was going to make herself and handed copies to myself and Emma, with the pattern number on so that we could be sure that we were all working from the same basic design. She then said that she wouldn’t need to see Lucy and Caitlin much before December as they would grow between now and then and measurements would be useless. It was also decided that I should try and go to their last two fittings or at least their last one which should be about two weeks before the wedding, still leaving plenty of time for adjustments. All this seemed like good advice and we gladly took it on board.

Appointments made we thanked the dressmaker profusely and wandered back out onto the street. Lunch seemed to be in order; it was a good opportunity for Lizzie and I to get to know Lucy, Caitlin and their mother Susan better. It turned out Lucy as the oldest at 14 and Caitlin was 12 and they seemed to like all the usual ‘girl stuff’. Lizzie got on really well with them; though their taste in music was somewhat different to hers there were enough similarities that they could have a decent conversation whilst I chatted to the others. We all exchanged contact details before we left for our separate journeys home and promised to keep in touch and send progress pictures as necessary.

Tom phoned that night and it was really difficult not to gush about the design of dress I’d chosen, there was no way I wanted him to find out anything before the big day, so we mainly talked about how his preparation was going. He said he was running, singing and playing lots, losing weight and honing his newfound skills at the same time which he found exhausting but rewarding. He was receiving praise from Rodney which made him very happy. I said I was pleased for him and not to wear himself out too much as I didn’t want him to waste away before our wedding! We signed off then with lots of love and kisses.


	65. Chapter 65

            Another week passed slowly, even though things were still coming together and suddenly it was the day before my birthday. I got up as usual and had breakfast with Lizzie before she headed to school. Having nothing planned after I’d done the dishes, I got out my sewing and settled down for a relaxing day. The ‘star phone’ went off about 10am and I thought it was just Luke until I saw it was Tom. I was immediately worried, he was five hours behind, why was he phoning me at 5am his time? I answered the phone quickly and to my surprise Tom sounded fine the other end of the line.

“Hi Love” I said “couldn’t sleep?”

“Not exactly” Tom hedged

“Oh. Then why are you phoning me so early? Not that I mind, it’s always lovely to hear your voice, you know that”

“Ah… well… you know it’s your birthday tomorrow?”

“Of course I do, silly” I giggled

“Well I ordered you something and the courier can only deliver it today and I wanted to hear your reaction so I set my alarm so I could be talking to you when it arrived”

“Aww, you’re so sweet” I said

Right on cue there was a knock at the door “Good timing” I exclaimed “there’s someone at the door”

“Brilliant” said Tom “You’d better open it then, keep on the line won’t you?”

“Of course”” I answered as I got up out of my chair and headed to my front door. I opened it and my entire view was filled with the biggest bouquet of flowers I’d ever seen. “Oh Tom” I breathed down the phone “They’re beautiful!” I stopped talking but kept the phone to my ear as I gazed at the flowers, golden roses and carnations interspersed with ferns and gerbera daisies, all in shades of gold and green and the odd flash of blue.    I gasped and looked again, there was no mistake. What I’d just seen between all the flowers were the unmistakeable bright blue eyes with crinkled corners of a man who was meant to be the other side of the Atlantic!

“Tom!” I squealed at the top of my lungs “What ae you doing here?” I’d forgotten I had the phone up and Tom must have had his to his ear too because his eyes narrowed in a wince and then widened again. He moved the flowers out of the way so that I could see all of him. It was definitely Tom! Still smiling as widely as I’d ever seen him he recovered his composure first.

“Surprise Darling, there was no way I was missing your birthday so I’ve got the weekend off!”

I was staggered “You flew all this way for the weekend just because it was my birthday?” I said weakly.

“Yes” was the reply “can I come in Darling?”

In a daze I moved out of his way and he strode into the cottage. He went straight to the kitchen to deposit the flowers and then before I knew it I was in his arms hugging him tightly “I wasn’t expecting to see you in the flesh until Christmas!” I said as silent tears of happiness streamed down my face. Tom gently guided me to the sofa and helped me to sit down. Gratefully my knees buckled as they felt the seat behind them and it was only Tom holding me up that stopped me falling too quickly. Once I was seated he sat beside me, arms firmly around me, his head resting on mine “Maybe Christmas has come early” he chuckled “Oh goodness. I hope not” I responded “I’ve nothing organised!”

“Well as far as this weekend goes there’s nothing for you to organise” he said cryptically. “Now upstairs with you, spare room wardrobe first and then your bedroom. You’ll find everything you need there but you must do it in that order and I’ll hear if you don’t” I just looked at him in bemusement. Laughing softly he gave me a gentle push “Go on Darling; remember spare room then your bedroom. I’ll still be here when you come down. I’ll even put the kettle on.” He stood up pulling me with him and gave me another push towards the stairs. I went, not exactly sure what was going on. Mindful of the fact that Tom would hear if I went in the ‘wrong’ room first, I entered the spare room and opened the wardrobe door. Front and centre was my weekend case with a note with Lizzie’s hand writing on top: it read

**_Hi Mum,_ **

**_If you are reading this then Tom is downstairs, probably making a decent cup of tea! I’m staying at Abbie’s this weekend but will see you tomorrow evening. Go with Tom, have a wonderful time and I’ll see you soon._ **

**_Remember we both love you_ **

**_Lizzie_ **

**_p.s. don’t forget your case!_ **

I couldn’t believe it; the pair of them were in cahoots again, ganging up on me to make sure I knew I was loved, this time they’d even managed to co-ordinate from either side of the Atlantic! I left my case outside my bedroom door as I went in to find a change of clothes on my bed. Lizzie had picked out for me a smart pair of black trousers and a peach shirt. I quickly shucked off my sweatpants and T-shirt I’d been planning to lounge around in that day and got changed, making sure the Hiddleston pendant was showing at my neck.

            As soon as Tom saw me coming down the stairs with my case he met me midway and took my case from me. “You don’t have to lift a finger this weekend” he informed me “The only thing you have to do is enjoy yourself” when I entered the living room the first thing I noticed was two mugs of tea steaming on the coffee table and I let out a little giggle. Tom turned to me in confusion “What?” he demanded

I giggled again at his reaction “It’s nothing really. It’s just that Lizzie said in her note to me that you’d be making a decent cup of tea whilst I got changed!” Tom chuckled at that “Bright girl, Lizzie. She doesn’t miss much!”

“No” I agreed “and she loves having someone to plot with against me I’m sure”

Tom put on an innocent look “I’m sure I don’t know what you mean” he said managing to sound hurt but his eyes were dancing with mischief and he knew they’d been caught out again. As I sipped my tea I tried to find out what the plans were for the remainder of Tom’s stay but he was tight lipped. All I could glean from him was that he had to stick to his food plan as much as possible and he was flying from our local airport back to Nashville via London on Monday night, giving us nearly four days together. In fact he only asked two things of me for the weekend. One that I enjoy myself and two a lift to the airport Monday evening! Well I couldn’t refuse, could I?

            Tea drunk Tom gathered the cups and quickly washed them in the kitchen, leaving them to drain on the side. He then grabbed my case and car keys and disappeared outside; he was back within a minute minus my case. “You’re OK if we take your car Darling? Seemed silly to hire one when yours is here anyway. I’ll do all the driving.” I agreed, of course and he held out his arm for me to take as he escorted me out to my own car. As always he opened the door for me and made sure I was settled before closing it and going round to the driver’s side. Sitting in he took a moment to adjust the seat backwards to accommodate his long limbs. I didn’t mind being shorter than him, at 5’ 7” I was considered tall for a woman but I was just the right height for my head to rest comfortably rest on Tom’s shoulder when we were standing and for him to kiss the top of my head, as he liked to do without either of us having to bend or stretch too much. When he was sorted we set off. I was surprised when I realised we were heading to Bath, the city where it had all started for us, unless we were heading for the motorway and off to London. I dismissed that thought almost instantly – if we were in London how would I get to see Lizzie the next day?

            Tom drove carefully through the streets of Bath and I struggled to figure out where we were going until we pulled onto The Royal Crescent. I looked around astonished as Tom managed to get my car into quite a small space just down from the Royal Crescent Hotel. I nearly had to pinch myself as the doorman and a valet turned up on Tom’s side of the car.

“Mr. Hiddleston, we’ve been expecting you. Please follow me into the hotel, the valet will take care of your car and luggage” said the doorman deferentially. Tom leapt out of his seat and was around to my door in the blink of an eye, helping me out and offering me his arm once again as we followed the doorman into the hotel.


	66. So sorry, this is not a new chapter :-(

Hello to all you lovely readers. I'm really sorry I haven't updated this weekend but things went a bit off kilter and look like they may be for a while.   
Some of you may know my Hubby ( who has no idea I am writing this and I want it to stay that way!) has been having a problem with his neck and has had a M R I scan to see what's going on. Well the result is that he has a collapsing disc in his neck and the doctor has signed him off for at least a month and is pushing to get him on the urgent surgery list.  
In these situations I normally try and post when he's asleep and I'm confident I won't be disturbed but that didn't happen this weekend hence no chapter for which I humbly apologise. I will try and update at some point this week but if I can't you should definitely get a new chapter late on Friday UK time. I want to stick to one chapter a week though as I have about 10 in hand, they just need checking before posting.  
Your support will mean a lot to me at this time and you can rest assured that this story will not be abandoned even if the worst happens and I have to officially put it on hiatus in which case I will let you know 

Thanks again for reading and commenting, you guys are my sanity!

Love you all 

Roo


	67. Yay, a proper chapter

 Ch.66

           Once inside I felt had to curb my natural curiosity and not to look around everywhere all at once to try and see everything. I tried to stay cool, calm and collected as we registered, as if I did this all the time when actually, apart from the interview, and the meal at The Ruben this was my first time in a five star hotel for pleasure. I felt giddy with excitement and tried not to look as if I was clinging on to Tom for dear life. The man in question was getting very good at reading my moods by now and gently squeezed my hand with his as we were shown to out suite by the manager. The suite of rooms was smaller than the hotel in London but cosier for it. There was a large four-poster bed dominating the bedroom but I was disappointed to see no canopy. The bathroom was big enough for a decent sized bath and I wondered if I’d get to indulge in that particular luxury, especially because it looked like it had integral massage jets. The sitting room was furnished with comfy looking sofas and a small solid oak table and chairs were placed to get the best view of the garden, as our rooms were at the back of the hotel. Whilst the manager was still in the room explaining all the amenities the valet arrived with our luggage. I had no idea how Tom’s case came to be there as I hadn’t seen it at the cottage but decided that it was a conundrum that could wait till later. Tom tipped the valet, thanked the manager and they let themselves out. As soon as they were gone I sat on the bed and let out a giggle, Tom looked over at me, perplexed.

“What’s the matter Darling?”

“Nothing much” I managed to get out between giggles

“It doesn’t sound like ‘nothing much’ Tom countered, smiling, as he joined me on the bed “Now, what’s tickled your funny bone?”

I just about calmed down enough to explain “I can’t believe that I’m here, that you’re here! I keep thinking this is all a delicious dream and when I wake up you’ll still be in America and I’ll be on my own on my birthday”

Tom took one of my hands and gently pinched my palm “Did you feel that?” he asked as I tried to pull my hand away.

“Oww! Yes!” I retorted.

“Then I’m here” he said simply, leaning over to kiss me as only he could. Breaking the kiss he smiled at me fondly. “You have no idea how many times I had to stop myself putting these dates in my phone, knowing if I did you’d see them and the surprise would be ruined. And this” he gestured to the room we were in “is just the tip of the iceberg for this weekend.”

I stared at him in utter amazement “But why are you going to all this trouble? I told you it was OK when you told us you got the part!”

“I know you did” he said kindly “and I understand the sentiment behind your gesture but the more I thought about it the more unfair it seemed. I was here for Lizzie’s ‘first’ birthday, I’m home for our ‘first’ Christmas and I already know I’m home for my birthday next year which will be our first together too. Why should you miss out on a first?”

I tried forming a response, all that come out however was “But… but…”

Tom chuckled “It’s not often you’re lost for words Darling! Look, in my line of work I can’t promise I’ll be here for every birthday or anniversary and even Christmas may sometimes be disrupted, though I do try and avoid that, but I can promise you this: - I’ll try and be here for every ‘first’ and if that means flying home for the weekend from halfway across the globe then so be it. Now is that an end to the matter?” I nodded my head dumbly, still unable to put my emotions and thoughts into words without the risk of bursting into tears for the second time in one day. “Good” said Tom decisively “now shall we unpack and then I think a spot of tea in the garden is called for.”

            He once again helped me to my feet and hand in hand we went to get our cases. When I opened the large double wardrobe I was surprised to see two garment bags hanging there. I went to take one out but Tom noticed and playfully swatted my hand out of the way. “Ah ah ah, no peeking Darling, that’s another part of your surprise, you won’t need that today” I huffed quietly to myself but I’m sure Tom noticed because he looked at me with such an impish grin on his face and such a glint in his eyes that I knew he was enjoying this immensely.

            Lizzie had outdone herself with the packing, a complete outfit for every day and she’d even packed the blue dress and jewellery that I’d worn on our first public night out. She’d managed to put in my favourite outfits as well so even if I didn’t know what was going on at least I’d be comfortable and look good. Clothes away Tom led me to the hotel garden where a table for two had been set up under a flower covered arbour. Even though it was late September it was still mild and flowers were still blooming all over the garden. Tom pulled out my chair for me in true gentlemanly fashion and took the seat opposite me after I’d sat down. We’d not been seated long before a young girl arrived with a tray laden with goodies. There was a large pot of tea and a selection of small sandwiches and cakes, so many different cakes that I almost couldn’t decide which one to try first when everything had been placed on the table the young girl left us alone, not even bothering Tom for an autograph which was nice of her. Tom poured us both a cup of tea and eyed the cakes and sandwiches enviously.

Seeing this I said “How, exactly, does a weekend of treating me fit in with your diet plan?”

He looked at me, face slightly pink, and said “It doesn’t really, however they have a small gym here and as long as I run for two hours a day and be careful what I eat it should be OK. We don’t start filming for another two weeks and I don’t have to be at my lightest until November December time, as luckily we are filming chronologically. Needless to say I’m already dreading Thanksgiving but looking forward to Christmas.” He finished with a wry smile.

“Oh” I said “in that case it’s extremely good of you to torture yourself for me. I know how sweet your tooth is” I took my choice of a small piece of carrot cake, which is one of my favourites and smiled as I cut off a corner and held it out to Tom. “Go on” I urged “you know you want to!” With a guilty look Tom took the cake and popped it in his mouth, the look on his face morphing to one of pure pleasure as his taste buds registered all the flavours. It was the nicest cake I’d had for ages so I could only imagine how it would taste to Tom after a month of abstinence. Taking a sip of his tea he sighed “That’s better” he said “Americans just can’t make tea! We sat and chatted until all the tea was gone, we’d also made a reasonable hole in the sandwiches and cake but I have to admit that was mainly me. Tom had eaten very sparingly and I couldn’t help but worry about him, although I didn’t say anything, of course.


	68. Chapter 67

When we were suitably refreshed we went back to our suite. It was still only early evening and I wondered what Tom had planned for the rest of the night. It turned out that a movie and a meal out were the plan and I looked forward to sitting in a darkened cinema with my beloved fiancé, snuggling as close as possible and maybe even paying attention to the screen every now and then. Bath is busy all year round so it was with some trepidation that I went to get ready for the evening. I just had to hope that anyone who thought they saw us would dismiss it as most of his fans should think he was still in America preparing to be Hank Williams. Tom had no such qualms, dressing nicely as usual in smart trousers, plain shirt and a jacket. I wore one of my favourite long flowing skirts and a smart blouse and jacket that Lizzie had packed for me. I wasn’t one for much make up so it didn’t take long for me to be ready and we took a taxi to the city centre.

            The cinema was not far from the Abbey Yard so we had to go and reminisce at the spot where fate (and a lack of concentration on my part) threw us together. Tom remembered exactly where it was and we stood gazing at the illuminated Abbey for a few moments.

“Thank you” Tom murmured

“For what?” I asked puzzled

“For taking a chance on me, for deciding to stay, even though you know it will be difficult, for braving my ‘army’, for just being you really” he said softly, his voice getting even softer as he mentioned the Hiddlestoners just in case any were around.

I smiled gently at him “I’m fairly sure it should be me thanking you” I countered

“Why?”

“For looking after me so well, for loving Lizzie like a daughter already and most of all for showing me I’m ready for love again. I thought my chance for happiness had gone but you’ve proved me wrong so many times. I can’t thank you enough”

“Darling, you know it’s been my absolute pleasure to get to know you and Lizzie and I’m looking forward so much to being able to call you my wife” he said tenderly and he touched his forehead to mine in a gesture I found incredibly romantic and meaningful. Our reminiscing over we headed for the cinema where we sat in the back row like a couple of teenagers, giggling and generally being silly. Nobody paid us any attention though and it was really nice just to be two people in love doing normal stuff without wondering if it was going to make the papers the next day of if we were going to be interrupted by fans asking for autographs or selfies

            Movie over it was time to eat and Tom led me through the back streets of Bath to a small restaurant he’d found when his play was here. It was a lovely family owned place, very cosy, and Tom had obviously frequented it quite a bit in the spring as he was welcomed as an old friend. The food was plain and delicious without pretentious names and fancy sauces. Tom ate sparingly again and I was getting slightly concerned about how little he was eating in general. He must have seen the look on my face because he stopped eating and looked me square in the eye to say “You’re worrying about me again aren’t you?”

I nodded slightly, unable to lie to him.

“Well don’t” he said softly “I’m fine and I will be fine, even when I’m at my lightest. You know they wouldn’t risk their leading man”

“I know” I sighed “I can’t help worrying though. It’s the first time I’ve seen what you go through for the camera and I didn’t realise how intense it could get!”

“I know” he chuckled “you should have seen Mum when I got Loki. I put all that muscle on to audition for Thor and then I had to lose it all again to be Loki and had to learn all the fighting styles. She thought I was being really reckless, but look where it got me”

“Hmm, I’ve seen your Thor audition, you make a much better Loki” and I giggled

“Why thank you Darling, I’m glad you approve” Tom said cheekily. We carried on with our meal and before long we were finished. Tom paid the bill without letting me see it; we thanked the owner profusely and wandered back to The Royal Crescent. Bath is built on a series of hills so it was a fairly good workout just walking from the centre back as none of the hills are really gentle.

            When we got back to our rooms Tom ran me a bubble bath and suggested that I get in and relax whilst he went to the gym for an hour or so as he had ten miles to run every day and he’d promised the film people not to skip any days. He quickly got changed into his running gear and after a quick kiss on the lips headed out of the room. I headed to the bathroom and was surprised to find a glass of wine and some of my favourite chocolates waiting for me. After getting undressed I slipped under the water and settled in for a soak, taking the odd small sip of wine and savouring the chocolate.

            The water seemed to stay really warm for ages, so much so that when Tom came back, all hot and sweaty, I was still in the bath. Seeing me in the water and some steam rising gently off the water he simply took off his clothes and got in with me, sitting behind me and encasing me with him long limbs. I leant back against his firm chest feeling the happiest I’d been since the start of the month. Tom found the controls for the massage jets and turned them on without telling me. I think he got most of the benefit as I was still between his legs but the bit I got felt wonderful. Eventually we decided to get out of the bath; Tom popped a towel around his waist before he wrapped me in a huge bath sheet and proceeded to dry me off. It felt so blissful I nearly fell asleep on my feet. Luckily Tom felt me swaying and simply picked me up, towel and all and carried me to the bed where he finished drying me off before drying himself as I put on my night clothes. When he was ready for bed he slid under the covers beside me and drew me into his arms.

“I’ve missed this” he murmured

“Me too” I agreed “Thank you for all of this Tom, I can’t quite believe this is real still. But I’m looking forward to tomorrow”

“So am I Darling, so am I” he replied and with that we fell asleep.


	69. Chapter 69

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for my absence, I've had a very busy two weekends and it's been impossible for me to post, but then I did warn you that things might get sporadic.  
> anyway here is the next chapter and I hope you enjoy :-)

            When I woke up on my birthday the space next to me was empty and for a split second I really did wonder if it had all been a dream. Then I realised that I wasn’t at home and of course it was real! There was a note from Tom for me on my pillow and I opened it eagerly wondering if it would hold any clues for the day- it didn’t, but it did wish me a Happy Birthday and asked me to stay in bed until he came back in the room. I was happy to comply, the bed was warm and comfy and it was the easiest thing in the world to lie there, relaxed and waiting for Tom to return.

            I didn’t have long to wait, before long Tom was back, he’d been down the gym having decided that five miles in the morning and again later wouldn’t eat into our time together as much as a ten mile run would. As soon as he saw I was awake he bounded over to the bed and jumped on it, landing with precision next to me where he claimed kiss “Happy Birthday Darling” he said, kissing me again “breakfast will be here soon but you’re to have it in bed today as I guess it’s not a treat you get very often”

I smiled broadly at him “How did you guess?”

He looked at me and shrugged “it doesn’t take a genius Darling” just then there was a gentle knock on the door. Tom got off the bed to open it and revealed a waiter carrying our breakfast on a tray. There were two grapefruit halves and a boiled egg for Tom and a plate of pastries for me, along with a large pot of coffee for me and a smaller pot of tea for Tom. I can’t honestly say Tom ate his breakfast with enthusiasm but he managed not to pull too bad a face. He had fun feeding me breads and pastries, bites at a time which I washed down with the coffee. When I’d had enough to eat Tom took the tray to place it outside the door and came back into the room “Now” he said “you stay in bed just a little longer whilst I have a quick shower and then the bathroom is all yours. You have a special outfit to wear this morning and it will be on the bed waiting for you when you come out”

I immediately started to worry ‘special outfit’. What was it? Why? Were we doing something dangerous or where we’d get really dirty? Tom took one look at my face and was by my side in an instant, pulling me into a big hug. “Don’t worry” he said soothingly “do you really think I would organise anything you wouldn’t like, today of all days?”

I shook my head slowly and said “No” in a very small voice

“So trust me” he said with finality and went to have his shower. I was left feeling rather silly on the bed. I knew by now that Tom loved to surprise me and spoil me rotten and I knew that he wouldn’t intentionally do anything to cause me distress.

            I managed to compose myself just before the bathroom door opened and Tom emerged with just a towel around his hips.

“You’re not dressed” I said, stating the obvious

“No” he replied “I’m going to get changed in the bathroom whilst you are getting dressed out here”

I decided not to question anything any further and went into the bathroom for a quick shower to try and wake me up and also relax me a bit. On exiting the bathroom I saw Tom, all dried off now with one of the garment bags in his hands. I tried to peek around him to see my ‘special outfit’ but the sneaky man had hidden it under the other garment bag!

“Right” he said “time to get dressed, do the best you can and anything you need help with I’ll do when I come out” He headed back into the bathroom and as soon as his back was turned I lifted the bag to see what exactly I would be wearing that day. There’s no point denying it I squealed loudly with delight when I saw my dress. It was a beautiful green Empire line floor length satin dress paired with a very short brown velvet jacket with long sleeves. It wouldn’t have looked out of place in a production of Pride and Prejudice and I’m sure I heard Tom chuckling as my squeal died away. My mind started racing then with images of what he would look like emerging from the bathroom when it hit me, he would be Mr. John Plumptre, but all grown up. ‘Oh Wow’ I thought to myself ‘I’m going to have my very own Mr Darcy! I did struggle with the dress a bit, the under petticoats were easy enough, they just fastened with a ribbon but the dress was another matter. I slipped it on over my head easily enough and got my arms into the small sleeves but the five buttons from the neck to the middle of my back were beyond me as they were small and fiddly. I found a pair of lovely little brown boots at the end of the bed so I put them on, loving the way they laced up; I was surprised how comfortable they were too. There was a brown bonnet with pretty ribbons as part of the ensemble which, of course, I had to try on to see how it looked. I slipped the little jacket on and did it up, realising that it only came down to just below my breasts. I moved to look in the full length mirror and was shocked. The person staring back at me didn’t look much like me at all, she had my face and eyes but looked so different and definitely looked like she’s stepped out of a Jane Austin novel, which I suspected was the point.

            I saw the bathroom door open in the mirror and kept my eyes glued to my reflection as Tom emerged, he looked absolutely divine. He was wearing tight tan high waisted trousers and knee length brown boots which had the effect of making his legs seem like they went on for miles. I let my eyes travel up his body, admiring the heavily brocaded light blue, double breasted waistcoat that hugged his figure so faithfully. I assumed that there was a white shirt underneath but much of it was hidden by the waistcoat and large cravat that was tied beautifully around his neck. He was wearing a mid-brown tail coat, the front of which reached to the top of his trousers and the tails reached down to the back of his knees. Hanging loosely in his hand at his side was a black silk top hat which, I knew, would make him seem even taller than he already was. I looked at his face last; there was a curious expression on it, part soft smile and part anxiety, hoping everything was Ok for me, that everything fitted and that I wasn’t too worried. I smiled gently at him in the mirror and his face relaxed into a broad smile. He crossed the room in three long strides, putting his hat on the bed in passing, coming to stand behind me and wrapping his long arms around my waist. “OK Darling?” he murmured in my ear not taking his eyes off our reflections.

“Oh yes thank you, almost perfect” I replied

“‘Almost perfect’ Why what’s wrong?” he said, brows furrowed in sudden consternation. It was  so adorable the way he worried about things like that I almost didn’t let him off the hook, however I couldn’t really go wherever we were going with the back of my dress hanging open so I turned in his arms, kissed him fully and said “Can you do my buttons up please Love, I can’t reach them!”

Once again his countenance smoothed out into another broad smile. “Of course I can, let’s slip off your jacket and bonnet” he proceeded to do so, lovingly and gently, placing the items next to his hat on the bed. “Now, turn around again for me so I can reach them?” he continued. I complied and in no time at all his nimble fingers had fastened the tiny buttons for me. Spinning me around again gently to face him it was his turn to kiss me, holding my head in his large warm hands as usual. His kiss managed to convey feelings that were nearly impossible to vocalise. I felt longing, passion, and commitment all in the space of a few seconds. He pulled away, eyes shining with happiness.

“And now?” he queried. I shimmied slightly in the dress, settling the fabric on my shoulders now that it was fastened.

“Perfect!” I said, smiling at him happily as he breathed out an exaggerated sigh of relief.

“Thank goodness for that, now Miss Jackie” he said, suddenly slipping into character “your carriage awaits” and he held out my jacket for me to slip my arms in and when it was on, and fastened, handed me my bonnet.


	70. Chapter 69

Tom held out his arm to me in time honoured fashion and I gladly took it, wanting to experience the whole effect of our outfits. We headed out to the front of the hotel where I found that Tom was talking literally about the carriage! There was an open topped carriage pulled by two bay horses complete with a liveried footman and driver waiting for us. The footman held the door open and Tom helped me in, climbing in behind me much more gracefully that I had managed. There was a thick blanket for us to put over our knees which we accepted gratefully, although it had been warm enough the previous afternoon in the garden, it was late September and the morning was taking a little time to warm up. Once we were comfortable the driver flicked the reins and we set off at a sedate walk. Tom slipped his arm around my shoulders very quickly and I snuggled into his side. We wound our way through the streets of the city, taking in all the sights we could get to. We seemed to be garnering quite a lot of attention, carriages and horse drawn traps were not an uncommon sight in Bath, but the occupants were normally tourists, not people dressed in period costume. I saw more than one phone out as people took pictures and filmed our progress. Struck by a sudden thought I angled my head so that I could murmur in Tom’s ear

“Luke does know you’re home, right?

“Of course he does Darling, I wouldn’t dream of doing something like this without letting him know, mainly because I’d get into so much trouble if I didn’t, especially because I’m meant to be away at the moment. If I’m not engaged in a project or an appearance then my time is my own, but if I’m working then Luke has to know what I’m up to.”

“That’s good to know” I responded “otherwise he may have a pink fit with brass knobs on when these pictures hit the web today and tomorrow”

He paled slightly besides me “Crikey! I hadn’t thought of that” he exclaimed “I was only thinking about making sure you had a wonderful birthday”

“And I am having a wonderful birthday” I assured him “and if these pictures do get on the net I’ll have some lovely pictures as memories too”

“Yes you will” he said

The carriage came to a stop then and I was surprised we were behind the Roman Baths.

“This is our stop” Tom said cheerily, removing the blanket from our knees and standing up as the footman opened the door. Tom got out first and held out his hand to help me out for which I was very grateful. I picked up my skirts and as gracefully as I could manage alighted from the carriage. Holding out his arm to me as before we walked around to the front of the building, through all the tourists, to the main door of the world famous Pump Rooms which were situated next to the Roman Baths themselves.

            Tom was immediately spotted by the greeter at the door, though he would have been hard to miss at 6’ 2” and wearing a top hat. We were escorted to a slightly secluded table inside. Almost straight away a beautiful china tea service appeared and a cake stand filled with small sandwiches, cakes and Bath Buns, which are a speciality of the City. I poured us both a cup of tea and we sat and drank it genteelly whilst I ate some of the small cakes and sandwiches, Tom was abstaining for the moment. There was something about sitting in those beautiful surroundings, in a gorgeous dress and opposite the most handsome man in the world (in my opinion) that I nearly forgot I was a 21st Century woman and started to think I was back in the 19th Century. I found myself wondering if Tom feels like this all the time, never quite totally himself, always performing to some degree, except when he was totally out of the public eye of course. I tried a couple of times to get him to tell me what was happening for the rest of the weekend, but he refused dismissing every query with a gentle ‘just wait and see Darling’ so I gave up in the end.

            When the tea was all drunk and I’d had enough to eat, we headed back outside, to where we’d left the carriage only to find it surrounded by people petting the horses. I wondered if we would hold back until the small crowd had dispersed but apparently not. Without even pausing in our progress in the slightest we walked up to the carriage and Tom opened the door for me. In my peripheral vision I could see some of the younger members doing a classic ‘double take’ as Tom stood there, the very image of a Regency gentleman. The phones and cameras came out in force then and we were asked very politely asked if we wouldn’t mind posing for a few photographs. Ever happy to oblige but wary of potentially ruining my day Tom raised an eyebrow at me in an easily read ‘do you mind?’ My response was a subtle shake of the head ‘No’. I really didn’t mind if we stopped for a while to indulge these people, some of whom would have their day made when they realised *exactly* who was standing amongst them and, from a purely selfish point of view, I definitely didn’t want to be seen as the woman who kept Tom away from his fans!

            It took perhaps only fifteen minutes to please the crowd and as I’d privately predicted some of the girls were rendered nearly speechless when they got a good long look at the face under the top hat. A couple of his most ardent fans asked him what he was doing home when he was meant to be in America and he told them about it being my birthday and wanting to make it special. They then apologised profusely to me for ruining my day and also congratulating me on my recent(ish) engagement. They’d seen the photos taken in London and were thrilled to meet us in real life. We took a couple of extra photos with them, all of us beaming broadly into the camera, held by Tom of course as he had the longest arms. They wished us all the best for the future and just before they made to leave Tom bent down and whispered something in their ears. Their heads shot round to look at me again and then straight back to Tom where they nodded vigorously and smiled happily. Tom kissed them both briefly on the cheek, which they gasped at and then they were gone and we were suddenly alone, well apart from the footman and driver of course

            When we were seated in the carriage once more, the blanket snuggly over our knees I asked Tom what he’d said to the last two fans. He refused to tell me saying I would find out in the fullness of time. As we pulled away from the kerb he pulled me closer, into the warmth of his body and murmured softly in my ear.

“Thank you”

“For what?” I replied, basically into his chest.

“For understanding I suppose” he said cryptically, and then decided to clarify “I mean, it’s your birthday, I’m here especially for you and we’ve basically just spent twenty minutes with some of my fans and some tourists instead of being focussed on your enjoyment of the day. I’m sorry about that”

“There’s no need to apologise Tom” I said soothingly “I knew what you were like and how much you were adored long before I started going out with you. I was one of your devoted fans remember? I know how they feel when they get to meet you because I feel it every day, well it’s different now of course because you love me back but I guarantee you some of those girls will never forget today, and nor will I”

Tom just sat there, momentarily stunned by my words “You’re….you’re…you’re amazing. You do realise that?” he said, finally getting his vocal chords to work.

I shrugged nonchalantly “I have been told that on occasion” I deadpanned “but it never hurts to hear it again” I broke into quiet giggles then, the look on his face was a picture as he realised I’d be teasing him ever so slightly.

            We continued with our city tour in high spirits, Tom doffed his top hat to some of the women walking by and it was really funny to see them giggle and blush like teenagers. At one point we travelled over the shop lined Pultney Bridge, one of the few bridges in the country to have buildings on both sides. Catching sight of our reflection in the many shop windows I was no longer surprised that we caused such a stir, Tom looked every inch the English Lord and whilst I didn’t look much like his Lady, my dress being too plain for that, there was an elegance to me that I didn’t remember seeing before. In short we made a very handsome couple and I really did hope that some of those pictures found their way onto my ‘Tom’blr feed.


	71. Chapter 70

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to wish all my American readers a happy Independence Day, and for any of you not in the best of health I hope you get well soon. Love Roo x x x

We were soon back in The Royal Crescent pulling up outside our base for the weekend. The ever attentive footman jumped down and opened the door, and as ever Tom exited first and reached back to help me down safely. We thanked the footman and carriage driver, petted the horses who’d worked so hard pulling us around and went back into the hotel. Up in our room I regretfully took off my gorgeous outfit and put it back carefully in the garment bag as Tom divested himself of his outer Mr Darcy.

“I love this outfit” I sighed as I hung it up once more in the large wardrobe. “I’m going to miss it”

“It’s a good job you don’t have to then isn’t it?” Tom said unexpectedly “These outfits were tailor made for us Darling, they’re ours to keep and do with as we wish”

“Really Tom?” I asked shocked

“Really really” he replied with a smile. I knew we wouldn’t get many chances to wear these wonderful clothes again but the very thought that I could made me happy and I ran over to him and gave him a huge hug.

“Thank you so much” I said

He smiled down at me with the special smile he saved just for me when he thought I was being particularly adorable and kissed the top of my head “You’re welcome” he mumbled into my hair. We stayed like that for a long moment until Tom gently pulled me off him “I have to go for my run” he explained regretfully “I’ll be gone about an hour so I can actually eat tonight and we need to be ready to go in about two hours. Will you were your blue ‘London’ dress please? You look stunning in that.” he turned and pulled on his running gear.

“Of course I will” I said knowing Lizzie had packed it on purpose. Thinking of her reminded me that she had said in her note that she would be seeing me today and I had no idea how we would find her or even how she was travelling to Bath. “Where are we meeting Lizzie?” I asked Tom.

“You’re worrying again aren’t you?” he chided me gently “It’s all arranged. She’s meeting us here and we’re all taking a taxi to our destination. Now can I go for my run?”

“Yes, I suppose so” I said

He flashed me his most brilliant smile, grabbed his iPod and earbuds and headed out of the door, leaving me to mull over the weekend so far. I contemplated how much Tom must love me to fly all the way from America for a weekend just because it was my birthday especially as I knew he should have been busy preparing to be Hank Williams. He’d told me that he had to sing and play guitar for six hours a day and go for a ten mile run before eating a sparing meal in the evening after which he was learning his lines and reading through the script. It was no wonder that some nights he looked so tired on my computer screen. I’d made him promise that he’d only read to me if he really felt like it and he’d agreed to that. I didn’t want him exhausting himself just to satisfy a whim of mine. We’d got it sussed by now. If he’d had a trying day singing I’d get a quick call from him before he went for his run but, if he’d had a good day and was feeling OK I’d get a text simply saying **< Story? >** If I replied in the affirmative he’d Skype at about 11pm UK and read to me until I fell asleep. He was very good at judging the point to wish me goodnight so that I‘d still hear him and be able to respond before sinking deeper into dreamland.

            Realising I’d been daydreaming for a bit too long I headed for the bathroom to get ready. After a quick shower I sat at the vanity unit and perused the make-up Lizzie had so thoughtfully packed for me. I tried to recreate the look Janet had given me the first night I’d worn the dress and although I wasn’t as skilled as her, I thought I’d made a passable effort. Slipping into my beautiful satin dress again felt so much better than the last time as I had no planned photographers to worry about this time. It was just a lovely birthday evening with my fiancé and daughter. When it came to what jewellery to wear I had somewhat of a dilemma. The sapphires that went with the dress were with me but I also had the ‘Hiddleston Pendant’ as I’d taken to calling it. In fact I loved it so much it was rarely not around my neck as I only took it off for bathing. It really meant a lot to me, not only for its history, which was impressive, but also for the sentiment that it carried from Tom, telling anyone that could decipher the message that I was adored. I decided to ask Tom which he would prefer me to wear as I couldn’t make my mind up.

            Tom was back before too long, hot, sweaty and smelling wonderful, it took all of my self-control not to give him a lovely hug and inhale that unique scent I loved so much but I knew that satin and sweat were not a good combination so I had to content myself with just admiring the view as he stripped out of his running gear and went to have his shower, clad only in his boxers. Once he was dressed in a black three piece suit, white shirt and black tie I told him about my jewellery dilemma. After getting me to put both pieces on we decided that the sapphires were the way to go. Just then the room phone rang and Tom answered it he listened intently for a moment and then said “Thank you very much, if you could just escort her to our room that would be wonderful” and I realised Lizzie must be on her way up.

            Very soon there was a knock on the door, Tom opened it and a vision of loveliness entered. It took me a moment to realise it was actually Lizzie, mainly because I’d never seen the dress she was wearing before. It was a white maxi dress with a royal blue and black abstract design on it. She’d teamed it with a black long line cardigan and looked absolutely beautiful. Tom, ever the gentleman greeted her with a chaste kiss on each cheek and, more in keeping with the nature of their relationship, a long hug. He then escorted her over to me and we both stood for a moment admiring each other’s dresses.

“You look lovely” we said in unison and burst into giggles. Lizzie was the first to stop laughing.

“Happy birthday Mum” she said, still smiling and handed me a small present. I un-wrapped it to find a bottle of my favourite perfume which I opened and dabbed behind my ears and on my pulse points. Tom leaned in and sniffed appreciatively.

“Mmm, lovely Darling” he said as he exhaled “You’ll have to give me the name Lizzie so that I can ensure your mum never runs out”

“Sure Tom” Lizzie said easily

Glancing at the time Tom was suddenly all business like “The taxi will be downstairs very soon ladies. Shall we?” and with that he held out his arms for us to take. It would have been fine except the doors and corridors of the hotel were not quite wide enough for three people to walk abreast so I walked with Tom for now with Lizzie just behind, once there was room though Tom insisted we held his arms when we could.


	72. Chapter 71

The taxi was indeed waiting for us outside and we all got in, being mindful of creasing outfits unnecessarily. It was only a quick ride down into the city and I was very surprised when we stopped outside the inevitable row of Georgian town houses, none of which looked like a restaurant. It was a lovely location though, right by the Abbey and opposite Parade Gardens and the River Avon. Tom walked confidently up to a gate set in the railings that ran across the front of all the properties and I could see the stairs that led down into what would have probably been the kitchen when the house was in its prime. Through the gate and down the stairs we went, in single file as there was no way to walk side by side. On reaching the bottom we re-arranged ourselves once again and entered the building via a glass door into an entrance vestibule. At once everything became clear to me, this was a restaurant! I marvelled at all the times I’d driven past and not realised it was there.  
We were met by the manager who escorted us to an alcove table where we would be hidden from most of the other patrons. The manager pulled out Lizzie’s chair as Tom did mine and we settled at the table. I still had no idea what type of cuisine the restaurant served and looking discretely did not seem to garner any useful clues. Tom, of course, noticed me looking around  
“Are you OK Darling?” he asked taking one of my hands in his.  
“Yes, I’m fine” I responded  
“No you’re not” he said simply “You’re too tense, I can feel it in your hand”  
I willed myself to relax; I struggled sometimes with not being in control of a situation. I liked to know what was going on and what to expect. Tom was always incredibly patient with me but refused to let it spoil any plans he had of romancing me, always making sure there was appoint of contact between us, even if it was only knees touching under a table, knowing his touch alone would calm me. With his help I was getting better, he loved organising surprises and treats for me when he was around and I was learning to cope, but sometimes it still got too much. I took a couple of deep breaths and Tom squeezed my hand encouragingly.  
“Better?” he asked solicitously  
“A little” I answered truthfully.  
“I’m glad” came the response  
Just then a waiter arrived with the menus and took our drinks order, very boring no alcohol at all, though I was looking forward to my raspberry lemonade. When we were alone again we opened the menus to decide what to have to eat. I had a big shock when I read the menu, I knew now what cuisine the restaurant offered, I could recognise Italian when I saw it but couldn’t read it and I knew Lizzie couldn’t either. At that moment she looked at me over the top of the menu and shot me a worried look which I returned. Tom of course noticed, he could be very perceptive sometimes.  
“What’s the problem?” he asked softly leaning in as close as he could  
“Lizzie and I can’t read the menu” I whispered.  
Understanding dawned on that lovely face “Do you want me to order for you? He asked gently.  
“You know Italian?” I asked, surprised  
“Enough to get by” was the nonchalant response.  
“Yes please then, nothing too spicy though if you can”  
“No problem” replied Tom  
When the waiter returned Tom rattled off the order in what sounded to me like perfect Italian, definitely more than enough to get by! Once we were alone again Tom told us what he’d ordered. I had a chicken and pasta dish called Penne a Pollo and he’d ordered Lizzie a roasted vegetable pizza, saying we’d leave desserts to see if we had room. It all sounded lovely and when it arrived it looked and tasted lovely too. We ate slowly, not wanting to rush such a lovely meal. Even Tom managed to make a reasonable dent in his meal though I think he was eating slowly to fool his body that it was fuller than it really was. Main course over and plates cleared away Tom asked for the dessert menus. When they arrived Tom took the time to go through them with us so that Lizzie and I could choose what we wanted. After much deliberation I chose panna cotta with a raspberry sauce and Lizzie settled for Italian ice cream which Tom assured her would come with all the trimmings. He himself thought long and hard but then decided to have the same as me. Desserts were soon ordered and we made polite conversation whilst we waited, mainly filling Lizzie in on what we’d done that morning.  
The desserts arrived and were as delicious as the rest of the meal. My panna cotta was creamy but light and perfectly complimented by the raspberry sauce. Lizzie has a veritable mountain of ice cream topped off with wafers, sauce and sprinkles. I enjoyed mine so much I started swiping a small spoonful of Tom’s as well when he wasn’t looking. He finally spotted what I was doing and just raised his eyebrow at me as if to say 'What do you think you're doing?' I tried to look innocent which was difficult with my spoon half way to my mouth and explained my actions away by telling him I was helping with his diet. I’m not sure if he appreciated my efforts or not but the next thing I knew he was feeding me small spoonful’s himself. It was a lovely moment and one I shall never forget. When all the panna cotta was gone and Lizzie’s mountain had defeated her Tom called for the bill. Transaction completed we headed back to the outside world, up the stairs and back onto the wide pavement. We still had a little while before the car Tom had ordered for Lizzie arrived at the restaurant to take her back to Abbie’s where she was staying for another night. She would be back home with us on the Sunday evening as she had school on the Monday. We spent the time we were waiting wandering along the road to look at the River Avon and the weir below Pultney Bridge.  
When the car arrived we all got in because Tom had arranged for the driver to drop us back at the hotel before he took Lizzie to Abbie’s. The trip was quick and before I knew it we were back in The Royal Crescent saying goodnight to Lizzie with the requirement to text one of us when she was safe back where she was staying, mainly for my peace of mind.


	73. Chapter 72

After we’d seen Lizzie off we made our way to our room. Tom, as always, with at least one point of contact between us. I’d forgotten how safe and loved he made me feel from even the slightest touch, it was like I was the only person that mattered to him in that moment and he would defend me from anything.

The feeling was only intensified when I woke up before him the following morning to find that I was gathered in Tom’s arms with no hope of wriggling my way to freedom without disturbing him. I managed to steal a glance at the bedside clock and realised that it was time to get up anyway if Tom was going to take advantage of the hotel’s gym one last time. I managed to twist around I his arms so that I was facing him just as he woke up, disturbed by my efforts and I was rewarded with a sleepy smile and tender kisses on my lips, nose and forehead.

“Come on sleepyhead!” I said trying to sound stern which was very difficult faced with a still sleepy Tom. “Time to get up for your run”

“I don’t want to!” came the muffled reply as he buried his head in the crook of my neck.

“I know you don’t” I countered “but you’ve got to. It won’t take long to do your run and the more you manage this morning the less road pounding you’ll have to do this evening. I’m doing this for your own good!”

His head came out from my neck slowly as my words sunk in “I hadn’t thought of that” he admitted.

“I didn’t think you had” I smiled gently “Up you get now, you go run, and I’ll pack. Pick out what you want to wear today and I’ll sort the rest OK”

Faced with my logic and my offer to help even though I’d been told at the start of the weekend that I was not to lift a finger Tom reluctantly dragged himself out of bed and changed into his running gear. “I won’t be too long Darling” he said leaning over me where I still lay in bed to give me a kiss and made to go out of the room. The rotten devil snagged the bottom corner of the quilt on the way past and pulled, leaving me coverless just in my pyjamas. He was still chuckling as he shut the door to the suite.

            Huffing to myself I got out of bed and headed for the shower also planning to make the most of the hotel’s facilities whilst I could. Once I was showered and dressed in my favourite jeans and a smart blouse I made good on my promise to Tom and packed our suitcases. He hadn’t picked out what he wanted to wear so I left him out jeans and a casual shirt. By the time I was finished it was only a matter of minutes until Tom returned, hot, sweaty and looking totally delicious, with is hair plastered to his head. With a quick kiss in passing, giving me another chance to breathe in my favourite ‘Tom smell’ he headed for the shower. Once cleaned up he re-emerged from the bathroom with just a towel slung around his hips. I could already see a difference in how he looked now to just a month ago, definitely thinner and leaner, I couldn’t quite see his ribs but I knew they were not far under the surface. Luckily all the running was keeping him fit too so he wouldn’t end up ill from his forced weight loss but it looked to me like he didn’t have much more that he could lose.

            When he was dressed he pulled me in for a lovely long hug and kiss. Breaking the kiss but not the hug he asked me. “Have you had a nice weekend Darling?”

“Yes, thank you” I replied happily “best birthday for years!”

“I’m so glad” he said smiling “That was the plan after all. But now it’s time to go”

After a last check around the suite we gathered our cases and bags and headed to reception to check out. The valet brought my car around from where it had been parked since Friday and put our cases and bags in the boot for us. Once the valet had been tipped Tom opened the passenger for me and shut it again once I was in, getting in the driver’s side he pulled sedately way from the kerb and drove us back to the cottage. When the car eventually pulled to a stop the routine was reversed and we stepped back into the homeliness of my little cottage. Tom directed me to sit on the sofa whilst he sorted out our luggage; he even managed to figure out the washing machine with only minimal help!

            Lizzie was due home in a couple of hours and so we filled the time catching up with each other properly, Tom telling me all about his vocal training, and normal training for I saw the Light and me trying to explain the intricacies of cross stitch. After about an hour there was a knock at the door, Tom jumped up to open it muttering ‘perfect’ to himself as he did so. There was a muted conversation at the front door and then, to my surprise, a supermarket delivery driver aided by Tom was carrying bags of goodness knows what into my kitchen. Seeing the concern on my face Tom stopped on one of his trips to placate me. “It’s all OK Darling, I know you shop at the weekends when you can and I’ve dragged you away from that this weekend so I’ve ordered some bits and pieces from your favourite supermarket!

“Bits and pieces!” I echoed disbelievingly as yet more bags made their way past. Tom shrugged “I may have ordered enough for you and Lizzie for a couple of weeks. No big deal. Milk, bread and fresh veg should be all you need to get”

I opened my mouth to protest but Tom anticipated me and put one finger gently on my lips “Shush Darling, it’s all fine, you may even find a few treats” he said smiling broadly “Now I’d better go and help the driver, or at least thank him properly” and he headed off to do just that.

            When Lizzie came home a short while later she greeted us as normal and then went off to the kitchen to put away all the stuff Tom was not quite sure about, both of them keeping true to their promise that I wouldn’t have to do anything this weekend. I must say I was rather enjoying it, being waited on in my own home but it also felt very strange. When they emerged from the kitchen, deep in a whispered conversation, they came and sat next to me on the sofa bracketing me. It felt so nice to be all together again. I knew that these occasions would be few and far between, especially up until Christmas, after that, of course, there would be plenty of last minute wedding things to attend to and Tom would still have some commitments to fulfil, so even then it would be precious time we spent together as a family. Even after the wedding there was this ‘big project in March’ that Tom had mentioned to Malcolm, that I was still in the dark about but trusted I would find out about it when the time was right. It did seem to make a ‘proper’ honeymoon somewhat questionable though seeing as we were getting married at the end of February. We hadn’t discussed a honeymoon destination yet and I wasn’t about to potentially ruin the good mood of the weekend by bringing the subject up in case it really was something that would have to take place after the ‘big project’. Accordingly I reminded myself that traditionally the honeymoon was the groom’s responsibility and I knew that Tom would treat me rotten as soon as he could so I pushed all thoughts of disappointment out of my head and focussed on the here and now.

            Tom decided that we needed to put a movie on and because it was my birthday weekend it was my choice. I gave it some serious consideration, choosing to leave all the Tom ones to when I was missing him too much. I didn’t even fancy one of my favourite war films, The Dambusters could wait for a while. In the end I decided on Mamma Mia! I knew even Lizzie would know most of the words and it was a great fun film. Choice made we put it on and we settled in for a good old sing along. As I’d predicted we didn’t need the lyrics on the screen and soon we’d abandoned the sofa for some serious dance moves instead. If the singing was a bit raucous it didn’t matter, the cottage had no neighbours so we could be as loud as we liked. All in all it was a great choice and a lot of fun. We were happily exhausted by the end of the film.

            Lizzie and Tom then announced that they were going to make the evening meal and left me watching an old classic, Singing in the Rain. Soon there were delicious aromas wafting in from the kitchen and I sniffed the air appreciatively, something smelt wonderful. I could hear things sizzling and boiling but I couldn’t make out what was being created and Tom refused to be drawn when he came in to see how I was doing. As soon as the meal was ready he was in again to escort me to the beautifully laid kitchen table complete with a small vase of flowers presumably cut from the big bouquet from Friday and wine glasses for all. Pride of place in the centre of the table was one of my best oven proof dishes filled with what looked like a cottage pie and next to it a large bowl filled with steaming vegetables. Tom held my chair out for me as usual and I sat down. Tom then sat down opposite me and Lizzie sat between us at the end of the table.

“I hope you enjoy this Darling” Tom said “When I knew I could be here today I got my dietician for the film to come up with a menu we could all eat together, using English ingredients of course and this is what he came up with”

“You went to all that trouble?” I said astounded at the lengths people had gone to.

“I did” Tom said “the dietician enjoyed the challenge of finding English equivalents for some of the ingredients and said he would happily do it again if needed”

“I’ve kept a copy of the recipe Mum” Lizzie added “just in case you want to eat it again, so tuck in”

Not wanting the meal to get too much colder we did as Lizzie had suggested. I used a serving spoon to break the white fluffy crust in the casserole dish and took a large spoonful of the contents. The fluffy topping did indeed look like the expected mashed potatoes but it was definitely less dense. It was sitting on what, at first glance, seemed to be a meat sauce, and I wondered for a moment how helpful this really was to Tom’s diet. The way he was serving himself the dish assuaged all my fears though. He had taken a generous portion and knowing from long before I knew him and also now, up close, how meticulous his preparation for any role was I knew that it was all OK.

            At that moment, as he put the spoon back he looked straight at me “It’s fine” he said as if reading my thoughts “ it looks succulent and decadent but really it’s practically fat free. It’s Quorn, onions, chopped tomatoes, lots of herbs, tomato puree and water, and the secret ingredient; to thicken it is porridge oats!”

Porridge oats?” I queried

“Yep” said Tom happily “put them in for the last five minutes or so, remember to stir ever so often and voila, a creamy sauce with carbs that are actually good for you. And the topping is half mashed potato and half very low fat soft cheese. Tuck in!”

I did as he suggested and was pleasantly surprised at how tasty the meal really was. If Tom hadn’t said anything I would never had known the difference. Finishing my first mouthful I smiled broadly at him and said “if your dietician comes up with any more brilliant recipes be sure and bring them home won’t you?”

“Sure will Ma’am” came the reply in his best southern drawl causing Lizzie and I to giggle. We continued the meal in virtual silence, a testament to how good it was. There were some leftovers and seeing this Tom commented “I’ve been told it freezes well too”

“That’s good to know” I said as Lizzie stood to clear the table and collect the pudding. That turned out to be a fresh fruit salad, with lovely crisp apples, pears, fresh grapes, pineapple chunks, pomegranate, and my all-time favourite soft fruit raspberries. This was served with a low fat raspberry yogurt and made a refreshing and light end to the meal. Once we were finished I was ushered into the living room once more whilst Tom and Lizzie did the dishes.


	74. Chapter 74

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so so sorry for the lack of updates, hubby has been told by his Dr to expect to be off work for the foreseeable future :-( This will obviously restrict my time to type up my longhand version, so we are now at the point where updates are officially sporadic for which I apologise but I can't bring myself to tell him about this fic so that's the way it will stay. As I said to my dear friend Caffiend this week, this will not be abandoned I know what my last chapter of the third part will be and I will write and post it at some point in the future. I thank you all patient readers for sticking with me whilst this goes on and I love you all. <3

Chapter 73

            When the dishes were all squared away again, I was joined on the sofa by two of my favourite people in the whole world; as much as they sometimes exasperated me they were, without doubt, the two people I loved most in the world. The conversation inevitably turned towards wedding plans. I told Tom where we were with florists and photographers. I had thought about filming the ceremony but discounted it as too much of a busman’s holiday for about half the guests. I did tentatively ask if Tom had any thoughts about what the Groom’s party should wear and was very pleased when he said he hadn’t had time yet and then, of course, he wanted to know why.

“It would be just one more thing to tick off the list” I tried

His eyes narrowed at me “Try again!” he said somewhat sternly

I thought about it briefly and then caved; there was no point in causing upset with him going away again the next day. “OK” I said softly “I know what I want to get you as a wedding present and also presents for Hems, Ben and Martin” He went to speak but it was my turn to silence him with a finger over his lips “It’s not too extravagant, but it does necessitate you all wearing a nice suit with a breast pocket for a square. Waistcoats are optional but you know how much I love you in a three piece, the only other provisos are; it has to be black to fit in with the theme, no tails please, I want to be able to see your delicious behind and if white shirts could be worn that would be great” I paused “Oh and no ties please” I didn’t bother mentioning the need for French cuffs knowing for something this special Tom would wear them anyway.

Tom just sat there stunned. Finally he managed “Luke was right, you do give things a lot of thought don’t you?”

I blushed, I knew he meant it as a compliment “Only the things that truly matter” I demurred

“Well” Tom responded with a soft look in his eye “I did say whatever you wanted, so yes Darling, I think that can be arranged. You want us all the same?”

“Yes please” I said shyly “if that’s OK?”

“I’ll make it OK” Tom declared “of course now I’m intrigued as to what the presents will be”

“You’ll have to wait” I said smiling “I’m telling no one, not even Lizzie” they both pouted at that. I knew they talked more than they thought I was aware of, as proven by the planning that had gone into this weekend, and I was really glad that Lizzie would have a step dad that would really care for her and treat her as his own, as much as she would let him. I knew Tom felt he was constantly treading a fine line between routinely spoiling her and giving her the things he thought she deserved. He’d been really good so far, the one big extravagance being her birthday, which I suppose was only to be expected and I didn’t expect it to change too much when he was officially her step father.

            For her part I knew Lizzie loved Tom almost as much as she’d loved Sean, but she was only young when her father died and memories fade over time, though she had a good collection of photos of us all together that she kept in a special album. It would be good for her to have a father figure especially as she was coming up to an important time in her life with G.C.S.E’s looming and major life choices to be made. A different point of view than mine but also from someone who cared about her would, hopefully, help guide her on her way.

            Making the most of having Tom in the same time zone, even if it was for a short while, we updated the spreadsheet Luke had set up regarding invites and acceptances. I was staggered when I saw the number of young children but I knew it wasn’t so much of a headache anymore. Leanne had been brilliant and within the promised 24 hours had contacted a world renowned college for Nannies who happened to have a part of their establishment in Bath. They had gladly said that they would supply a team of final year girls and a supervisor to run a crèche and provide babysitting services for the whole week we had Eddington Court. I had been amazed at how simply it seemed to have happened but Leanne had assured me that the College was treating it like work experience and we would only have to pay for their food and accommodation for the Nannies. The reputation of the College was such that I knew discretion wouldn’t be an issue and after a quick check around the parents the answer had been a resounding ‘Yes please’. We’d even managed to get a couple of Winnebago’s hired for the week for their accommodation from a company whose name Tom had remembered from filming in England and he said they were very comfortable and clean. Poor Luke had been kept very busy with NDA’s but most everything was in place now.

            As Tom and I looked down the acceptances we were very happy to see so many friends on there, from both spheres of our lives and we realise this would be a true coming together of different backgrounds and experiences and quite frankly we couldn’t wait. By late evening we’d sorted out a few more bits and sent loads of emails. Tom particularly wanted the DJ who’d been at our Frome engagement party to keep us entertained on the Friday and Saturday night. It took a lot of scrolling back to find contact details for him. I agreed with him though, the disco at Frome was really good and , of course we had Thorne in The Roses doing a set for us, details of which Lizzie was keeping firmly under wraps. Just as we decided that no more could be done that night Tom realised that he hadn’t gone for his evening run; it was far too late for him to contemplate going out at that point and he had to resign himself to a long run in the morning as he was flying back to America the following evening. On that slightly depressing note we went to bed. I’m not sure who clung to each other more that night. It had been lovely having Tom home, even for such a brief time and Christmas seemed so far away at that point that I wondered if we’d ever get there.

            It was no surprise to wake up alone the next morning. I had to admire Tom’s dedication to his craft; it would have taken a lot more than the prospect of a run to get me out of bed and away from the one I loved that morning. There was a note on his pillow telling me roughly what time he thought he’d be back and I realised that we had time to make breakfast and hopefully it would be ready just as Tom returned. My mind made up I got out of bed and padded across the landing to wake Lizzie. She predictably, burrowed deeper under her duvet when I opened the door. I managed to talk her out of bed by promising her porridge, a breakfast she loved but hadn’t got the hang of cooking yet. I made enough for three, as I was fairly sure I’d seen it mentioned on Tom’s diet plan as something he was allowed and I thought he’s appreciate it when he got back from his run. In a piece of brilliant timing the porridge, Lizzie and Tom all came together at the same time and we sat down to breakfast together, ignoring Tom’s repeated apologies for not getting changed out of his running gear first. Looking at him properly I noticed that he was wearing the shirt he had left with me for the duration of filming and though I was extremely grateful that he’d topped up that heady scent I was also mortified because he now knew that I slept with it under my pillow. The sneaky blighter must have deliberately gone looking for it! He predictably seemed to know what I was thinking the minute the thought flashed across my face and the look I got back was pure devilment. I was sure I was going to be teased after Lizzie had gone to school.


	75. Chapter 75

            As soon as Lizzie had been packed off to school, though not without a big hug and kiss from Tom as we’d be at the airport when she came home from school and it would be Christmas before she saw him again we started tidying away the breakfast things the teasing started

“Do you know how long it took me to find this shirt Darling?” Tom asked, a cheeky grin on his face.

“How would I?” I responded “I didn’t know you were even looking for it”

“It took me about 30 seconds” he said “and I’m hurt that you didn’t even notice it was missing last night”

“Now come on Tom, why would I need your shirt when I had you right next to me?” was the only response I could think of.

“Hmm. OK, fair point Darling. I am gratified that you keep it close when you sleep though”

“Why would I keep it anywhere else? My book is in my bedside table and your shirt is under my pillow. I’m as close to you as I can physically be without wearing your shirt and losing all that glorious aroma”

He looked at me anew then and I realised I’d managed to turn the teasing tables without even trying. Although he knew how much I liked the smell of hot sweaty Tom he himself didn’t like it so much which was why he was always so desperate for a shower and change when he go back from a run. My calling it a ‘glorious aroma’ had him blushing slightly and although he seemed to blush easily enough in interviews me getting him to do it was still a fairly rare occurrence.

“Maybe I’d better stay in it a bit longer then just for you, to make sure the aroma is properly ingrained” he said with a smile

“Maybe you should” was my rejoinder and he did. I got to see him and smell him in that shirt all morning.

            At some point in the morning, as I was making us both a cup of tea in the kitchen Tom came in with a strange look on his face.

“Darling?” he said hesitantly

“Yes Love?”

“I’ve got something I need to ask you.”

“Well go ahead then, I’m not going to bite” a raise of that eloquent eyebrow told me he thought differently. It always amazed me how much he could say merely by lifting that brow. It was something I looked for in his performances because I wasn’t convinced that he always knew what it was doing!

“So, the question?” I prompted when it looked like he wasn’t going to continue.

“Ah…yes….um”

“Oh come on, spit it out, the answer will either be Yes, No or maybe so what have you got to lose?”

He shrugged “Nothing I suppose. It’s about our first dance; would you like me to give you some lessons when I get home, maybe after Christmas? We know what Lizzie will play for us, and I just thought it would be nice if we could dance properly to it” the shy look was back on his face and I’m not sure what look was on mine as he then ploughed on with what he wanted to say. “I mean to say, you dance well but it’s such a special song for us I feel it needs a proper routine, nothing complicated” he added quickly as I could feel my eyebrows rise “but just so we both know what we’re doing” he looked at me hopefully. I contemplated his words. He was right of course, Lizzie and her band would play their version of Eternal Flame for us, no question, and it would be nice to have some idea of what I was supposed to be doing instead of hoping it would all work out OK. Obviously I trusted Tom to teach me, the whole fandom knew how he could move to dance music but ‘proper’ dancing had as far as I could tell been restricted to a slow sway in ‘The Deep Blue Sea’ and I had to admit I was curious to see what he could come up with.

“Yes please Love” I finally responded “That would be nice.” His whole face lit up briefly in a glorious smile and then the look from before was back. The <I’ve got something to say and you may not like it > look. “What is it now?” I asked him, no point procrastinating, there was something else on his mind and I needed to know what it was before he disappeared off to America again.

            Tom had also it seemed decided to bit the proverbial bullet “I picked up something whilst I was out on my run” he said

“Oh. What?” I asked, wondering why he was still not giving me a straight answer.

“No, not in here” he said cryptically “let’s go in the front room”

Shrugging and grabbing my still full mug of tea I followed him. As I got closer to the sofa I saw something unexpected on the coffee table. It was our faces smiling at each other on the front of a glossy magazine, Elle to be precise. “Oh my! Was that out today?” I squealed in horror Tom’s arm snaked around my waist in a comforting gesture.

“Yes Darling, another reason why I wanted to be home this weekend. Shall we take a look?”

Just like Luke had said they would Elle had done us proud, looking through the article there was not one word that wasn’t true, nothing had been hyped too much and even though I was biased it was obvious our love for each other shone through both in the words and in the images. I’d seen the expression of love on Tom’s face before of course, both on the screen and off but the power of his emotions in those pictures that had only been taken a scant month ago was breath-taking and there was something more in them than I’d seen before, something complete I suppose, and something genuine, a new look in his eye, one of total adoration. How I hadn’t noticed it when they were taken I wasn’t sure but looking through the article now it was so obvious.

“Happy Darling?” he asked me gently. For an answer I twisted in my seat and flung myself around his neck, my lips catching him unawares as I kissed him with a much passion as I could muster. Chuckling his famous laugh through my kisses as we fell against the seats of the sofa he managed to get out a breathy “I’ll take that as a yes then” before taking control of the kiss and proving to me, as if proof were needed anymore that day how much he loved me. Another penny dropped then “This is why you ordered all that shopping yesterday wasn’t it? So I don’t have to go to a supermarket for a while, until the fuss may have calmed down.”

He smiled softly at me then “I hope it helps” he said simply           

“How do you think your fans will react?” I asked timidly

“I suspect most of them will be happy for us; my true fans will be anyway. There will be some that don’t care and” he hesitated but I’d already guessed what he was going to say “there will be some that will hate you forever” he continued sadly “That’s one of the problems that comes from hanging around with a man who has his own ‘army’ you will never please all of them all of the time. And this point darling Jackie is the point where you promise me that if anything untoward happens to you or Lizzie from here on in, you contact Luke immediately. He won’t care if it’s the middle of the night, if it’s bad enough to worry either of you; it’s bad enough to let him know. He can deal with it so much better if he knows what’s happening. I mean things like hate mail to this address, or threats against you or Lizzie” he stopped then and started caressing my cheek in a comforting manner. “You’ve gone very pale Darling. Are you OK?” he asked gently. I didn’t answer for a bit, still processing what he’d said. Threats against Lizzie or me were a terrifying prospect, especially against Lizzie. We’d done our best to keep her out of the public glare; we’d only allowed one question about her in the interview and not mentioned her name at all. I’d basically acknowledged that I had a daughter from a previous relationship which was totally true. When asked about her father I’d just said that he was no longer in our lives, not that he was dead or I was a widow. I didn’t even name him. I felt bad for doing it but it was one more way to protect Lizzie’s identity, even if only a little and I took every opportunity I could to do that, so she could still have a normal life. I knew most of her school would know who my fiancé was by name but in my experience not everybody who heard Tom’s name could put a face to it. He was famous oh yes but also not yet unable to walk outside his front door or travel on the Tube. Mind you the way his career was going I supposed it wouldn’t be long.

            A sharp snapping sound brought me back to the present. Tom had resorted to clicking his fingers to get my attention back on him. “Jackie, speak to me. Are you OK?”

I blinked rapidly, trying to banish unhelpful thoughts “Yes Love, I’m fine” I managed quickly trying to allay his fears “it was just hearing you say that people out there may hate me because I’m with you was a bit of a shock really, well a lot of a shock.” I clarified.

“Oh God Jackie, that was a worst case scenario” he exclaimed “I probably over exaggerated because I can’t be here to look after you for the next few weeks. And I’m worried that if anything happens you’ll be stubborn and not tell Luke or myself. I’m sure it will all be fine. I know you already steer clear of social media so that shouldn’t be an issue, it just your ‘Tom’blr that may cause a problem. I can’t, and won’t, tell you what to do but I strongly suggest you stay away from there for at least a month”

I nodded my head in mute agreement. I knew Luke would be totally on top of this at this sensitive time and I did trust him to tell me anything that I needed to know. I tried a small smile for Tom “OK” I said quietly “but now I may need extra pictures of you to compensate”

“Done” he responded happily “at least one a day!”

“Thanks. I’m still going to miss you though”

“And I you, more than you can imagine, but we can count down to Christmas together”

“Yes we can” I said, feeling slightly happier.

            Tom went to get changed for this day then and I followed him upstairs and watched as he carefully took off his T-shirt, folded it neatly and resealed it in the two bags. Looking directly at me he lifted my pillows and placed it back in its temporary home. “There, back where it belongs” he said without a trace of condescension or sarcasm. “You will look after it for me won’t you? It’s a particular favourite of mine!”

“Of course I will” I said fervently. If Tom was going to trust me with his favourite shirt I was going to look after it! He pulled me in against his bare chest and held me tight “I love you so much Darling” he murmured into my hair.

“I love you too Tom” I said, basically into his chest.

After he’d showered and dressed we had a quick lunch of crispbread, cottage cheese and salad and a final decent cup of tea for Tom. We left the washing up, such as it was, for me to do later though as we realised that it was nearly time to leave for Bristol Airport from where Tom had a flight to London and from there to Nashville. It was a lot of travelling to do and then to be flung straight back into role preparation but I was really grateful that he’d put himself to so much bother.

With Tom’s luggage in the boot and Tom behind the wheel of my car we set off. It was about an hour and a half travelling time to the airport but the scenery was really pretty as we avoided the motorways and the two cities of Bath and Bristol and went cross country instead, passing through pretty villages and towns and down narrow country lanes. We chatted about inconsequential things on the way, neither one of us wanting to be in silence but also not having much to say that we hadn’t already. Tom was a good driver and we completed the journey with no problem.

            Because Tom basically only had hand luggage, check in was a breeze and we found a quiet corner of the departure area to sit in before he had to go through security. I think I saw a couple of people look our way but nobody approached us, maybe we looked like we didn’t want to be disturbed. Tom had an arm around my waist and I’d curled into his side, getting as much contact as I could for as long as possible, his free hand had snaked around me as well so I was wrapped in a loving embrace. I didn’t feel quite as sad this time, as I’d been when he first left a month ago. Tom had been correct in saying that the wonders of modern technology it was easy to stay in touch, once I’d mastered it of course, and because I had his shirt the only thing I’d really be missing was his warmth. Mind you that was quite a big miss.

            Tom’s flight was finally called and we stood together at the security barrier. We’d been a bit naughty and left it until the last minute but we knew that we had enough time between first and final call for Tom to make it to his flight. Bristol was quite a small airport so there were no huge distances to traverse. Tom gave me a sad smile and a lingering kiss and turned towards the barrier. Like the last time I couldn’t watch him disappear, so as he turned away so did I and we both said a soft ‘see you soon, I love you.’ I walked sadly out of the airport building to my car and drove home.


	76. Chapter 76

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's a short chapter, but hey at least is a chapter. Hubby is still off work and I'm trying to do this as best I can, when I can. Thank you all for sticking with me as always. It means a lot to know you are still there reading this even with my flaky posting. Love you all. Roo

It was about twelve days later that I had an unexpected phone call from Luke. He normally phoned once a week to check Lizzie and I were both OK but that was usually on a Friday and this was a Saturday. I answered the call in some trepidation.

“Hello Luke”

“Hello Jackie, how are you?”

“Oh, you know, same as I was yesterday” I giggled but noticed Luke didn’t share my humour. His next question threw me for six.

“You and Lizzie have got passports haven’t you?”

My heart fell into my stomach; the only reason for asking that I could come up with was that something had happened to Tom. “Y..y..yes” I stammered “What’s happened to Tom?”

Luke was quick to reassure me “Tom’s fine physically but Rodney is privately worried that mentally he’s not up to the role.”

“That’s nonsense!” I scoffed “He’s been working so hard on this. I’ve even had to get him to repeat himself because he’s slipped into a strong southern drawl”

“I know I know” sighed Luke “Rodney can’t put his finger on what exactly the problem is but he says it’s been coming on slowly since the start of the month”

Realisation dawned “Oh” I breathed “You mean since he got back from my birthday? Oh God. I’m sorry Luke. I didn’t ask him to come back. I didn’t know”

“Jackie, it’s alright” said Luke calmly “no one is blaming you but Rodney and I think you may be the solution”

“How do you mean? I’m in contact with him almost every day and he seems fine.” Even as I said that though I remembered a couple of occasions when Tom had said he was too tired to Skype and I’d had to settle for an old fashioned phone call. “He’s trying to hide it from us isn’t he?” I continued.

“I’m ninety percent sure he is” agreed Luke.

“So what can I do?” I asked.

“Well” said Luke “how soon can you fly to America?”

“Oh boy! Well luckily Lizzie is on Half Term next week, so Friday evening?”

“Perfect” said Luke “shooting starts on the 21st so that should give you guys a couple of days together before it all goes crazy.”

“Lizzie is coming as well” I stated “I can’t leave her for that long, she’ll worry about both of us then!”

“Yes Jackie, I wouldn’t dream of not including Lizzie in this” Luke said soothingly “now I’ve got your passport details haven’t I?”

“Yes” I affirmed it was one of the weird requests Luke had made of me when Tom and I got engaged but I saw the need for it now. If I ever needed to travel overseas quickly Luke could arrange it all and just give me the details, as he went on to prove.

“Right then, you can leave flights and visas to me. I have ways of speeding them up you see and I’ll let you have all of the details as soon as I’ve got them. Just one more thing. Not a word to Tom, it could make him worse and we don’t want that.”

“Sure” I agreed. I would do anything for Tom and so by extension Luke. He’d been so good to us whilst Tom was away and had handled the post interview reaction with his usual aplomb. His predictions had been spot on, most of the fan reaction had been positive and we’d had congratulation cards from all over the world, which still seemed strange to me. He’d even included in the odd packet of mail that he sent to me a couple of the more negative comments, nothing really hurtful just ardent fans expressing the sentiment that they wished it had been them instead. A sentiment I could fully support as I’m sure I would have felt the same!

            I told Lizzie as soon as I could about our great adventure and, after her initial concern over Tom, she was very excited, definitely more so than me, I was too busy worrying about Tom, hoping that all he needed was a metaphorical boot up his backside, but also hoping I didn’t let anything slip if he phoned. On Luke’s advice I made up a story about going out with friends on the day we were flying so he wouldn’t worry if I didn’t answer my phone whilst I was in the air.

            Luke was as good as his word and emailed me the flight details the next day. It was organised so that Jeff and I would pick Lizzie up from school on the Friday and go straight to Heathrow. We’d catch the overnight flight and arrive in Shreveport where I Saw the Light was going to be filmed just a day behind the rest of the cast and crew. Luke was travelling with us, partly to check we got there OK as we’d never flown before and partly to see Tom in the flesh and reassure himself that he really was OK.

            I have never known four days go so fast as that week did. Lizzie and I managed to fit in a bit of clothes shopping, mainly for casual stuff and spent two evenings packing our cases. I’d also gone out on the Monday and brought a large man’s T-shirt that I wore to bed every night trying to imbue it with my scent so that I could give it to Tom. I’d even gone so far as to embroider the neck with a message of love on the inside, where only he would see it. I stitched a red love heart on the front too.

 


	77. Chapter 77

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my goodness, don't worry, you're not seeing things. This is a new chapter!! I promised you that I hadn't given up on this so here you go. I do hope you enjoy xx

            Friday arrived and I packed Lizzie off to school and spent the next seven hours fretting about the next day or so. I hoped obviously that everything would be OK, that we’d be able to help Tom and that he wouldn’t mind us coming over. I’d had a couple of updates from Luke who’d said that things hadn’t improved much but neither had they declined so I took that as a positive omen. Luke was going to make his own way to Heathrow and meet us near the V.I.P lounge in departures as I knew where that was.

            Jeff arrived promptly as always and after checking everything was secure and that we had everything, including passports (!) we set off to pick up Lizzie. I didn’t want the pick up to look to conspicuous so I’d arranged a meeting place a little way from the school in a quiet cul-de-sac where we shouldn’t be spotted and indeed Lizzie was the only person Jeff and I saw. True to here earlier statement to Luke about not jeopardising my relationship with Tom she had told none of her friends where she was spending half term. I loved her so much for that, for respecting our privacy. I’m sure some teenagers would be so boastful if their parent was dating a celebrity but as far as I could work out from her friends Lizzie barely mentioned Tom around them and sidestepped questions from fans at school rather neatly.

            We chatted with Jeff all the way to the airport. We hadn’t seen him since Tom had gone to the States at the end of August and I hadn’t realised how much I missed our conversations, so we had a nice long natter, catching up on each other’s news. The travel gods must have been on our side because even for a Friday rush hour the roads were not blocked solid and we made Heathrow just a little later than we expected but no so late as to cause a problem. I’d been texting Luke out travel status regularly and he was ready to meet us having had a much shorter and easier journey.

            When we got to passenger drop off, it was Jeff who hopped out of the car to open the door for us and as he got the luggage out of the boot, Lizzie went on a trolley hunt. Having found one Jeff put our cases on it and wished us good luck and happy travels. We thanked him for all his help and turned and went into Departures. I couldn’t help thinking about the last time I was here; never did I think I’d be back so soon. Luke actually met us before I was expecting him to and he helped us check in and made sure we had everything we needed. There was even an official from the American Embassy just to stick our visas in our passports and to confirm that Lizzie and I were who Luke had said we were. I thanked him for putting himself out so much for us, which he waved off saying ‘it was no problem Ma’am.’ We then headed towards the nearest rest room so that Lizzie could change out or her uniform and into something more appropriate and from there we went into the V.I.P departure lounge.

            In contrast to the rather stark room Tom and I had said goodbye in just a few weeks before the lounge was furnished with plush looking sofas and arm chairs, occasional tables and some small office type desks with electrical sockets for anyone who needed to work instead of relax. There weren’t too many people in the lounge so Lizzie, Luke and I commandeered an occasional table and its accompanying comfy chairs. Luke gave us a quiet briefing about what to expect when we got to America; we would be allowed to go on set with Tom when it came time for him to start filming, an activity we were looking forward to as soon as we heard about it. Luke also explained that Tom was still living with Rodney Crowell and his wife, Claudia, as it was felt by all of them that Tom needed constant access to his ‘country mentor.’ Rodney was confident that accommodation for us all could be found, but they hadn’t had much time to find out as they were only a day ahead of us in Shreveport.

            It seemed no time at all before our flight was called and I supposed it was one of the privileges of being a V.I.P that you didn’t have to wait for too long for anything. We’d gathered our belongings and went towards the departure gate. We walked along a long corridor that ended at the door of the plane and I made to go into economy class where I assumed we were sitting but was stopped by the stewardess at the door who politely pointed me to my left. I looked back at Luke confused. I knew I hadn’t flown before but I knew many friends who had and they’d wistfully commented more than once how nice it must be to enter a plane and turn left instead of right. Luke smiled and said “It’s fine Jackie, only the best for Tom’s girls and besides he’s paying although he doesn’t know it yet!”

Only partially reassured I turned towards the First Class cabin where I was met by another stewardess who led us to our seats. Lizzie and I had seats next to each other and Luke was just across a wide aisle. The seats were arranged in pairs and had a privacy screen that could be pulled up between them if you didn’t feel like conversing with your neighbour. They looked like a cross between an armchair and a bed which is actually what they were. At the touch of a button on a control pad the chair back reclined and the leg rest lifted until the whole thing was fully horizontal, providing a much more relaxing sleeping position than trying to sleep sitting up in economy. The stewardess showed us how to work our individual screens and headphones and explained how to call her if we needed anything. She also said that she didn’t have many passengers to look after on this flight so nothing would be too much trouble. After she’d left to deal with her next clients Lizzie and I just looked at each other and began giggling quietly. All this luxury was amazing and we were willing to indulge. I glanced over at Luke and could see he was pleased with our reaction. I thanked him for his generosity and for the bed of course, it had already been a long day and a transatlantic flight with no decent sleep would not have been good preparation for seeing Tom the next day. He thanked me but reminded me that it was Tom’s generosity not his. I think I realised then how much Tom trusted Luke, even with his bank account details though I supposed in Tom’s line of work it was almost unavoidable.

Just then the cabin announcement went off and we were advised to get ready for take-off. Lizzie and I checked our seat belts and made sure everything was as it should be. Shortly afterwards the stewardesses did the safety drill and I was amused to see it was as portrayed on the telly and film. The drill over the plane began taxiing towards the runway. Lizzie’s hand snuck over the small distance between us and grabbed mine. I squeezed it in what I hoped was a reassuring fashion and gave her an encouraging smile which she returned, albeit half-heartedly. The plane got to the end of the runway and turned to face the correct direction, it stopped still for a short while and then the engine noise started to rise. It kept getting louder and louder until, suddenly we were moving again. We picked up speed rapidly and I was pushed back into my seat by the G-forge generated. It felt so exhilarating. I squeezed Lizzie’s hand again and was rewarded by a broad grin; she was enjoying it as much as I was! I looked over at Luke to see him looking at us so I gave him the thumbs up with my free hand. He visibly relaxed and I wondered briefly if he thought he may have to deal with women who were scared of flying and was obviously relieved that he didn’t.

The plane climbed to cruising altitude quite quickly, the steep rate of ascent helping with that of course. When the fasten seatbelts light went out we took them off and set about exploring all we could do. The stewardess came round and gave us the food menu and a complimentary drink, explaining that swallowing would help our ears adjust to the changes in pressure. We chose our meals and were told they’d be about an hour.       I spent some time finding something to watch on the integral screen and was pleased and surprised to find Thor: The Dark World on there. It was by far my favourite Loki film so I decided to indulge myself especially because I got to see ‘Butt Chains’ again, which was always worth a watch.

When our meals arrived they were on china plates with nice cutlery and had been presented really well. I cast my mind back to the stories of friends who’d travelled long haul and had said that the only way to think of the food was a fuel for the body. The food I was eating seemed a far cry from meals they had described and I supposed it was another perk of First Class travel. The meal tasted as good as it looked and after the stewardess had cleared away the empty plates Luke came over to see us.

“How are you two ladies doing?” he asked.

“Fine thanks” Lizzie and I chorused.

“Good, good” Luke replied

“Do you always travel like this?” Lizzie asked

“Sometimes” Luke allowed “it all depends on where we are going and when. If we think we can manage it without making life too difficult then Tom and I will still travel economy, but for you ladies on your first flight only the best will do” and he smiled broadly at us.

“Oh. OK, thanks” replied Lizzie politely

Luke continued gently “Now I know you girls are excited but today has been a long day and tomorrow probably will be too so can I suggest you try and get some sleep? There’s breakfast before we land and I can arrange for the stewardess to wake you up for that if you want?”

I spoke up “we don’t have to stop anywhere en route like Tom did?”

“Not this trip” replied Luke “this one is practically door to door. We have to change to a smaller plane when we land to take us to Shreveport but basically it’s a straight flight.”

“Oh” I said “Right thanks” relieved that we didn’t have the long lay over to contend with like Tom had had in August “well then Luke, if it’s all the same to you, we will try and get some rest”

Luke smiled benignly “That’s fine, do you want waking up for breakfast?”

“Yes please” I replied

Luke helped us adjust our seats into beds and lowered the lights so we could sleep. Never in my wildest dreams before I met Tom could I have imagined that I would ever get to do something as exciting as this. The seat bed was surprisingly comfortable and before long Lizzie and I had drifted off.


	78. Chapter 78

The next thing I knew Luke was waking us up just before breakfast. Lizzie and I tried to freshen up briefly in one of the toilets but it was futile really. I just hoped that there would be time to make ourselves presentable, if not to Rodney and his wife, then at least before I saw Tom. Returning to our beds we turned them back into seats and waited for our meal. Again it was well presented and it was no bother for the stewardess to change the offered orange juice to apple for me. Starting off with a three day headache would not help anyone! Breakfast was as tasty as the previous meal had been and set us up beautifully for the day ahead. I was very impressed at how good the food had been but then I really didn’t have much to compare it to, only the stories from my friends who’d travelled a lot more than I ever had.  
Soon it was time to stow everything away in its correct place as we were on final approach to the airport. Landing felt so different to take off. I kept looking out of the window to see the ground rush up to meet us. One little bounce and we were back on terra firma. The plane taxied to the arrivals dock and we could finally take our seatbelts off and gather up our belongings. We waited for Luke to lead us out of the plane as he knew what he was doing and we didn’t have a clue. We headed to immigration with Luke gently coaching us about what to expect. The questions were quite basic and then we were free to collect our luggage. I’d never appreciated before the value of luggage that stood out on a carousel as it seemed to take Lizzie and I far too long to locate our cases among the myriad of similar looking ones. Bags claimed we looked to Luke expectantly thinking he’d tell us what gate we were heading to for the short flight to Shreveport, he however had a strange look in his eye, one I’d normally only noticed in Tom’s and I knew he was up to something.  
To my surprise an electric buggy pulled up beside us with a small trailer attached for our bags.  
“Hop on ladies” said Luke with a grin that would put Tom’s best to shame. We clambered into the seats as Luke and the driver put our cases securely in the trailer and then we were travelling through the airport. To my surprise we were heading away from all the signs that pointed to the departure area and heading towards the far end of the terminal building. We went through another security check and then I realised that we were outside and heading towards a small sleek looking private plane. When I realised that we would be the only passengers I tapped Luke urgently on the shoulder.  
“Please tell me Tom isn’t paying for this as well?” I said worriedly  
“He’s not” said Luke placatingly “This is all Rodney’s doing, apparently he called in a few favours so that you could get to Tom with as little stress as possible”  
I gawped at him “You mean that whole plane is just for us three?”  
“Yep” said Luke “You wait until you see inside” he was unable to supress his smile.  
“Remind me to thank him when I meet him?” I said gratefully, knowing that Rodney must think a lot of Tom to go to all this trouble.  
Just then we pulled up alongside the jet and we were met by the pilot and the lady who would be our cabin crew for the short flight to our destination.  
As we entered the plane I felt as if I was suddenly in another world. The furnishing looked even more sumptuous than The Royal Crescent Hotel. Leather abounded, from the long sofas along one side of the fuselage to the executive style office chairs on the other. There was a small table bolted to the floor in front of the bench sofa and it was littered with magazines and leaflets. We situated ourselves on the bench sofa and buckled our seatbelts, the only outward sign that we were really on a plane and not in some swanky office somewhere. There was no safety briefing this time, just the pilot coming over the intercom telling us we were taking off soon and the expected duration of the flight. True to his word we were soon moving and it felt really odd to be travelling so fast sideways. Take off consequently felt really weird as instead of being pushed back in our seats we were effectively pushed sideways, and I was grateful for the arm rests that pulled out of the backrest for this part of the trip. As on the large jet as soon as we could we removed our seatbelts and the stewardess offered us a drink, with all the time differences we’d been through and travelling overnight to boot I wasn’t sure where in my day I actually was but figured I still had a long while before I could rest my head again so opted for a coffee. Lizzie, being prudent, asked for a fruit juice.  
During the second half of the flight Luke briefed us on what would happen for the rest of our stay. Today was Saturday so we would have a normal weekend with Tom and the Crowells and then Tom would be straight into filming on the Monday. Rodney had arranged passes so we could go on set at any time and I was especially looking forward to seeing how a film was actually made. Luke was quite willing to escort us anywhere we wanted to go in regards to sight-seeing and from the way Lizzie’s expression brightened at that I concluded that she’d take him up on his kind offer. My focus was of course Tom, we’d been brought over to help him get his head back in the game and so I would do whatever was needed to achieve that goal, even if it meant going on set with him every day and seeing nothing but that I was content as long as it helped Tom.  
Luke also explained that Rodney thought it best for Tom to keep to his usual routine so we would not be able to see him until late afternoon but that Claudia, Rodney’s wife had volunteered to pick us up from the airport and keep us entertained until we could sneak onto the small ranch where they were staying for the duration of filming so as to be able to spring the surprise on Tom most effectively. I was struck again at how many people were putting themselves out for us but I realised that an awful lot of time and effort would be wasted if Tom wasn’t up to filming so I supposed it would all be worth it in the end. Before long the fasten seatbelts sign came on and the pilot informed us that we were just starting our descent into Shreveport. The landing was uneventful and before we had time to register the fact that we would be seeing Tom in the next few hours Luke was ushering us out of the plane and onto the tarmac. Another little buggy type cart was waiting for us and we and our luggage were driven through the airport and into the arrivals hall without having to stop for anything. Travelling with Luke certainly made life a lot easier. Once the buggy had stopped we alighted and grabbed our cases whilst Luke scanned the hall for a familiar face. Spotting the one he wanted he led us to a pretty woman with long blond hair. Luke held out his hand to shake hers as he introduced us to each other.  
“Jackie, Lizzie, this is Claudia Church, Rodney’s wife. She’s going to be looking after us until we can get you to the ranch without Tom knowing you’re here.”  
We exchanged warm hugs over the barrier and then walked towards the exit and a waiting car.   
Claudia was really nice. She had sat in on a couple of conversations with Luke and Rodney and so knew exactly what was going on. She was quick to put my fears to rest about Tom’s trip home being the root cause of his current funk, saying that there had been quite a lot of negative press in America, especially around Nashville about Tom taking the part of Hank Williams, most notably from Hank’s grandson wondering what a classically educated and trained English man could bring to the role that an American couldn’t. I knew Tom was putting his heart and soul into this film, I’d heard him practicing at home long before he was due to leave. I was nearly as familiar with Hank’s body of work as Tom was from the amount I’d heard at home so I could understand why; even if only a bit of the negative stuff got through to him it would make him question himself. Now I knew what the problem was however I was fairly sure I could talk him out of it. I found out that Rodney and Claudia had tried, but had little success and they hoped I could do the trick.


	79. Chapter 79

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First and foremost I'd like to thank you all for sticking with me and this story through all the shoddy posting and lack of info. RL has not been kind recently, and although it's nothing serious it has taken my mind off this. However I have some possible good news. My hubby is having a pain killing cortisone injection in his neck in the beginning of January and if all goes well should be able to go back to work soon after, which would mean that I could go back to the posting schedule of this time last year (though I would have to build up my cushion of chapters) so here's hoping and before then a chapter that I like very much.
> 
> Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, or Happy Holidays take your pick and I'll see you next year.
> 
> Comments are always welcome :-)

We only had to stall for an hour and a half before Claudia got a text from Rodney saying Tom had gone on his run and was expected to be gone for just over an hour. Claudia immediately turned the car towards their temporary home and we were there within minutes. It was a lovely ranch style house complete with a porch around two sides and mature trees in the garden. The ground sloped away towards a small stream and I could see the roof of a small building peeking just over the level of the land, the building obviously standing on the bank of the stream. We distributed the luggage between us and made our way into the main house. As soon as we were inside Claudia was calling for Rodney to come and meet their guests. An older man appeared through a doorway and held out his hand to Luke.

“Nice to finally meet you properly, Luke” said Rodney “and this must be Jackie and Lizzie” He held out his hand for us to shake as Luke did the formal introductions, that done Rodney checked his watch “Now, Sir Lonesome-a-lot should be about another forty minutes or so”

I giggled “What did you call him?”

“Sir Lonesome-a-lot” Rodney repeated “it started off as a joke, but it’s been more appropriate lately, still now you’re here I hope things will get better”

Claudia interrupted “D’you guys want a quick drink? I’ve got fresh lemonade and I bet you haven’t had a lot to drink on your journey”

I hadn’t realised how thirsty I was until Claudia mentioned it but just then it sounded like the best idea in the world, Lizzie beat me to the answer though

“That would be nice Mrs Crowell, Thank you”

Claudia looked taken aback “Aw honey, I’m not Mrs Crowell, I’m Claudia and he’s Rodney and you’re welcome to call us that for as long as you need”

Lizzie looked at me for permission; I was glad to see that she remembered her manners and nodded my head slightly to let her know it was OK to be less formal.

            Leaving our cases in the hallway for now we all trooped into the kitchen, it was light and airy with a large dining table and chairs to one side and a well equipped kitchen on two walls including the ubiquitous large fridge. “We eat all our meals in here together” Rodney explained “just like one big family” I was looking forward to it already. Claudia got some glasses out and served the lemonade whilst Rodney outlined how he thought the next two days would go. Filming was due to start on Monday so he thought it would be a good idea if Tom and I moved into the little house whose roof I’d spotted for some privacy for the next day and a half. Meals would be in the main house but Tom was to be excused all practicing and running unless he wanted to.

            Knowing Tom would have his phone on him Rodney sent him a quick text telling him that there was something in the little house that should help him find his ‘inner Hank’ and told him exactly where to find it saying he should finish his run first, although Rodney explained that he’d pretty much timed the text to arrive when Tom was at the halfway point of his run anyway. Then, drinks finished Rodney grabbed my case and led our group down to the little house, which actually turned out to be a small log cabin with just one bedroom, a small but functional bathroom, a living room and kitchen. It was utterly charming and Lizzie looked a bit envious. She and Luke had a room each in the main house and she’d be seeing us at mealtimes, filming permitting. Luke had offered to look after her for the week and we’d decided it wouldn’t be a problem because he wasn’t quite as recognisable as Tom and no picture of Lizzie had appeared online with relation to us yet anyway, so they should both be pretty anonymous as they wandered round the town and took in the sights.

            Rodney dumped my case in the bedroom and checked his watch “You’ve got about five minutes” he said to me “I’ve told Tom he’ll find what he’s looking for on the small table in the living room” I looked and saw a pretty little round table next to one of the armchairs. I pointedly walked over to it, sat down and rested my arm on the table, which was just the right height. “Perfect” said Rodney and everybody giggled. Then turning to Luke and Lizzie he said “We’d better high tail it out of here, don’t want to ruin the surprise”

“OK” Luke and Lizzie responded with Luke adding “please text me when he gets here”

“Will do” I replied “now get going!” With that they left and I settled down to wait after getting the text ready to send Luke, so that all I’d have to do when Tom walked in the room was to hit ‘send’. It wasn’t long before I heard footsteps outside and I tried to compose my features into a welcoming smile. I was quite worried that Tom wouldn’t appreciate Lizzie and I travelling all this way to see him but consoled myself by reasoning we wouldn’t have done it if everything was OK here, it clearly wasn’t or why else would Rodney have contacted Luke?

            The footsteps got nearer as Tom entered the small entrance hall and from there into the living room. I saw him before he noticed me as he had his head down looking at his phone probably trying to figure out exactly what he was looking for. I hit ‘send’ on my phone and left my phone between my leg and the side of the chair, having already set it to silent. Tom was still walking into the room when he looked up and spotted me. He stopped mid stride, one foot up in the air as he tried to make sense of what he could see before him.

“Jackie?” he breathed, so quietly I barely heard him.

“Hello Love.” I said, giving him a soft smile

“Jackie!” louder this time, more sure of what he could see. As he covered the last couple of metres I stood up only to be grabbed around the waist and swung around and around as Tom displayed his happiness at seeing me so unexpectedly. When he’d stopped spinning and set me gently back on the floor his face was a picture of puzzlement “But Darling. What are you doing here?”

I smiled at him “What did the text from Rodney say?” I asked gently. His brow furrowed “Something strange about finding something to help me find my ‘inner Hank’ on the small table in this room” Still smiling I sat down again in the chair next to the table and made a show of laying my arm on the table. I could see the light dawning on his face “You?” he said “you’re here to help me? But how did you know I needed help. I thought I’d hidden it pretty well”

“Oh Tom” I sighed “You know you can’t lie for toffee! Rodney realised there was something not quite right before my birthday, and after you got back it seemed to get worse so he phoned Luke and together they hatched a plan to get me over here to see you to see if it would help”

“Rodney phoned Luke?” Tom queried “Oh God I’m going to be in so much trouble!”

“No you’re not” I retorted “Luke hasn’t told anyone at Hamilton Hodell and nor has anyone else. Luke is here as your friend not your publicist, he’s worried about you, we all are! We know you can do this, it’s only you stopping yourself”

“But we start filming on Monday!” he exclaimed “how am I going to be ready by then?”

“I think that might be quite simple” I responded “You know all your lines for the first day, right? Of course you do, I know how you prepare for roles, so you’ve got the weekend off. No running or playing unless you want to and lots of positivity coming from me.

Just then Tom’s phone rang and a worried look crossed his face as he saw who was calling, “Hello Rodney” he said carefully

“Sir Lonesome-a-lot, did you find what you were looking for?”

Tom turned to look at me and smiled for only the second time since he’d walked in the room “I think so” he said cautiously.

“Right, well you kids better come back up to the main house. Supper’s ready when you get here” Rodney replied, relief entering his voice.

Tom chuckled “we’re on our way” he said and ended the call. Holding out his arm to me in the time honoured fashion he asked “May I escort you to supper?” in his best Southern drawl. Trying to imitate his accent, and failing miserably I said “You may Sir” and took his arm.


	80. Chapter 80

            As we walked the short distance to the main house his hold on me changed so that we had our hands on each other’s waists by the time we reached the porch. Tom held the door open for me and we entered to be greeted by an exuberant Lizzie, very happy to have our little family back together again and a slightly more concerned Luke. Tom addressed him directly

“I’m so sorry Luke” he said sincerely

“It’s no problem mate” Luke said equally sincerely “No one knows we’re here except your mum and Emma so the only damage is to your bank account”

The confused look reappeared on Tom’s face until Luke explained “Three First Class return tickets to America at short notice don’t come cheap you know!”

Tom let out a small chuckle “Of course they don’t, thank you so much Luke”

“Again, not a problem Tom. I’m here as a friend this time”

Greetings over Tom went to have a quick shower and get changed, dragging me gently with him, almost like he was afraid that if he let go of me I’d disappear in a puff of smoke or something. Once showered and dressed in jeans and a T-shirt we both headed for the kitchen where sounds of conversation told us everyone was getting along just fine. When we entered the room all conversation stopped briefly and then resumed. Tom went straight to where Rodney was sitting and started to apologise once again but Rodney cut him off “There’s no need to apologise son” he said “You’ve got the rest of the weekend to relax with your gorgeous fiancée here and then I’m sure you’ll nail it come Monday. Now sit and eat”

Claudia had put on a lovely spread for all of us but I decided to show Tom how much I was there for him by only eating what he ate. When he noticed what I was doing he went to say something but I shot him a look that dared him to mention anything and he meekly went back to his meal.

When we’d all finished eating Lizzie and I helped Tom clear away all the dirty dishes and load the dishwasher and then we all took our seats round the table again. Rodney took the opportunity to fill Tom in on what I already knew. Tom and I would relocate to the little bunk house for the week to give us some privacy and Luke and Lizzie would stay in the main house. We were welcome on the film set as much as we liked as Rodney had procured us V.I.P passes, even Luke looked excited by the prospect.

            Tom and I then decided to take our leave and went to his room to grab his stuff for the week, his guitar came with us of course, and the script. No suits were needed, though he did say he was hoping to take me for a meal somewhere, and in less than ten minutes we were ready. It was just starting to get slightly darker outside and wandering hand in hand down to the little bunk house felt almost magical, the ranch being on the outskirts of town there was very little street noise and we could hear the birds singing to stake their territory for the night and the crickets chirping in the long grass either side of the track we were walking on. Tom was being very quiet, lost in thought, but I was sure he would be himself again as soon as we were inside the bunk house.

            I was proven correct because as soon as we were completely alone again Tom pulled me into a long, passionate kiss and hug. As he deepened the kiss he squeezed me tighter until I was gasping for breath. I had to resort to hitting him quite hard on his lower back before he would release me and I could pull in lungfuls of air again.

“I’m so sorry Darling, but I needed that!” he said contritely

“I could tell!” I said still trying to breathe normally again.

“I didn’t realise how much I missed you until I saw you again”

I had no words adequate enough to respond to that so I settled for a gentle hug.

“How long have you known you were coming?” came the gentle query as we made our way into the bedroom to put stuff away.

I did a quick calculation “A week I suppose, but it seems shorter with everything we had to fit in. Luke is an absolute miracle worker you know, don’t ever let him go!”

“I won’t! No fear!” Tom chuckled “He likes you too by the way, not that it matters to me whether he does or doesn’t”

“Oh but it does matter” I countered “I’d rather Luke liked me than half your fans as I will have to interact with him so much more than them. He was worried about you, we all were.”

“I know, and I’m sorry again. I tried to hide it” Tom said sorrowfully. I got a bit cross then.

“You great prune!” I exclaimed “I’m your fiancée; I’ll be your wife before you know it. You can’t keep stuff like that from me! I can’t support you if I don’t know there’s a problem!” I hadn’t shouted at him because that wouldn’t help anything but I’d kept my voice forceful and steady, it was actually my best ‘mummy voice’ one I’d had to use a few times with Lizzie and it was always effective. Apparently it worked on grown men too as Tom looked suitably abashed when I looked at him.

“Wow” he murmured almost to himself “I was right in July. I never want to see you angry!

“No, you don’t” I smiled “and if you’re still unsure about that just ask Lizzie!”

            We left it at that then; there was no need to say anymore. It was still reasonably early and the light was still good so we went for a short walk along the stream, quietly enjoying each other’s company as we picked our way along the bank listening to the water bubbling and gurgling over the small rocks that made up the stream bed. Tom had obviously been deep in thought because he suddenly stopped and pulled me even closer to him than I already was.

“I am truly sorry that I made you worry” he said “I’ll make sure that doesn’t happen again, if I’m having any problem I’ll tell you. I promise”

“Thank you” I replied “that’s all I need”

Realising how fast the light was now fading, we turned around and headed back to the bunk house. We needed our phone lights to see by the time we got to the door and we were giggling like children after we’d finally managed to open the thing and get inside.

“That was so much fun” said Tom slightly breathlessly “we should do things like that more often, sometimes the simple things really are the best”

“Yes, they really are” I agreed we decided to unpack a bit then, I definitely needed to unpack my good dresses to let the creases hang out, and the rest of my stuff to air after what seemed like a very long time since I’d placed it all carefully in there. During the process I found the little ‘care package ’I’d put together for Tom and handed it over a little shyly. It was a pretty gift bag with the T-shirt, some Hobnob biscuits and a small box of Earl Grey tea bags in it.

“What’s all this in aid of? He asked as he peered inside the bag.

“Oh it’s just a couple of things to remind you that I’m always thinking of you” I said. He pulled out the T-shirt first and shook it out, his eyes catching on the flash of contrasting colour on the inside of the neck where I’d stitched my message of love. As he held it up to his face to read what I’d sewn his eyes flew to meet mine.

“It smells of you!” he whispered.

I smiled at him “I thought I’d return the favour. I’ve got some reseal able bags here somewhere”

His eyes then lit on the heart on the front and he was momentarily lost for words. He took out the biscuits and tea next and looked at me, again with an unreadable expression on his face.

“Darling, this is all so wonderful. Thank you so much!” Not one second later he was kissing me, leaving me breathless yet again.

“So tea and biscuits every month then?” I said, only half joking.

“Yes please!” he said fervently, eyes bright with happiness.

“OK” I replied easily “consider it done.”

Once the tea and biscuits were away we decided to go to bed. I felt like I’d been awake forever, even though I’d slept on the plane and trying to stay awake until ‘local’ bed time had been harder than I thought, but the buzz of seeing Tom again had offset that somewhat. I was definitely ready to sleep however, in fat the more I thought about it the sleepier I was feeling and I got ready for bed almost mechanically. I slipped under the heavy covers of the bed, grateful for the warmth that they would keep in and then Tom was behind me, spooning me as usual, pulling me so close that you couldn’t have got a piece of paper between us and happily tangling our legs together. Tom let out a contented sigh and we settled down, no need for words except for quiet ‘goodnights’.


	81. Chapter 81

When I woke the next morning I was surprised to find that we hadn’t moved in the night. I was still wrapped up in Tom, his arms and legs doing a very good job of keeping me close. With a small jolt I realised that he’d hardly been out of some form of physical contact with me since we’d met in the living room of this little cabin and I hadn’t even noticed. It was the Sunday after our engagement again but in reverse, he was the one needing the constant contact and comfort this time. I could feel his warm breaths on my neck and as I moved slightly his limbs tightened instinctively.

            The trouble was I needed to go to the bathroom and he wouldn’t let me go. I couldn’t even wriggle around in his arms to face him so I had to resort to talking to thin air hoping to get him to wake up! It took some doing but finally I got him to respond. On the fifth try of “Tom. Love, it’s time to wake up” I got a very firm

“No. Not going to!”

“Well you have to” I replied

“Nope”

“Why not?”

“Because if I open my eyes then I’m awake and this lovely dream of having you in bed with me will end” came the soft reply though I could practically see him pouting.

Luckily my arms were free and I managed to reach back and pinch him fairly hard. I didn’t care where; I just wanted him to feel it.

“Ow” he grumbled

“Did you feel that?” I asked with a smile

“Yes, obviously!” he grumped

“Then I’m here and I need the bathroom please!” I could feel him reluctantly untangling our limbs until we were separated. I turned over and giggled to find Tom still with his eyes tightly shut. I leant forward and kissed him on one eyelid, he opened that eye so I kissed him on the other one too and he opened that one as well. He blinked a couple of times and whispered quietly “Wow, you really are here Darling. I thought it was all a lovely dream”

“Nope” I said “it’s real, you know you don’t feel pain in dreams and I just pinched you pretty hard!”

“So you’re really here?” he clarified

“Yes I am Love, for the whole week”

“But that’s wonderful!” he exclaimed “you can come to the set, and we can hang out and…” I put my finger on his lips, sometimes that seemed to be the only way to get him to stop talking!

“We can make plans after I’ve been to the bathroom”

“Oh yes, sorry!” he said quickly and let me out of bed to use the facilities.

As I came back I enquired as to what time breakfast was and Tom checked his watch. “Oh about forty five minutes” he said happily.

“Time for me to get washed and dressed then” I said and went back into the bathroom. Tom was happy to stay in the bedroom now that he knew I wasn’t a fantasy. Whilst he was in the bathroom I picked out a pretty blouse and my best jeans to wear, well it was a Sunday after all and I thought I’d better make an effort. Tom took his cue from me and put on a smart shirt and trousers but stopped short of adding a waistcoat. Once he was in his ‘normal’ ensemble I could see how much weight he’d lost, but he was obviously fine as far as I could tell, from how far Rodney had told me he ran every day and how easily he’d picked me up the night before. I knew he’d seen me looking but I decided not to say anything as there was no need.

            He held out his hand to me and I took it, smiling as he entwined our fingers together for the short walk up the hill to the main house. Not standing on ceremony we used the back door, which opened straight into the large kitchen diner and to my delight Lizzie was already up though I could tell by looking at her that she hadn’t been up long. She sounded a little groggy as she wished us good morning and squeaked in surprise when Tom planted a small kiss on her cheek. Luke walked in just at that moment and when Tom moved back to my side Luke huffed and said “Hey, where’s mine?” quickly backing off however when Tom made to kiss him too!

            It was obvious that Tom was in the best mood he’d been in for a while and Luke, Lizzie and I managed to exchange a brief ‘thumbs up’ behind his back as he went to put the kettle on. He was even happier when he’d managed to fill the kitchen with the fragrant scent of his favourite tea, which steeped as he made Luke and I a coffee, knowing from experience what we both needed to start our day. Claudia and Rodney were next to arrive and proceeded to cook up a storm in the kitchen, making pancakes, muffins and eggs quicker than I’d ever seen it done. There was a small mountain of toast too and all the spreads you could hope for but no marmalade though I could only have lemon or lemon and lime of that particular preserve anyway.

            Sticking to my plan to only eat what Tom had I was happy to see him plate himself some eggs on toast and when he added a couple of rashers of bacon I was nearly ecstatic. When he saw me looking at him he explained his actions “It’s Sunday, we do things differently here on a Sunday. A big breakfast, a snack at lunch, if needed, and then a family meal at about five or six in the evening. It gives everyone a good portion of the day to do what they want and then we all meet up again later on.”

“Sounds perfect” I said deciding to snag a couple of muffins for later now I knew I wouldn’t feel quite so guilty about eating them in front of Tom and, if I was feeling particularly generous, he might even get a small taste.

Claudia piped up then “As our guests, Jackie you Luke and Lizzie are excused kitchen duties this week”

I immediately protested “That’s not fair Claudia. I’m not going to let you do all the cooking all week. If I’m here I’m going to help!”

Tom looked between Claudia and myself “I’d give in if I were you Claudia” he opinioned with a smile “I’m just beginning to learn how truly stubborn Jackie can be, all in a good cause of course and there really is no point in arguing with her” I looked at him gratefully as Claudia simply shrugged and said “OK then” with a smile.

“And” I continued “Friday night is English Night. I’ll cook for you, as close as I can to authentic English dishes” and here I looked sideways at Tom “and desserts” Tom’s face fell as he realised that he may have to miss out on my home cooking for even longer now “Oh Love” I said consolingly “If I plan a menu tonight, with your help of course, then can you take it to your dietician tomorrow on set and see what he can do? I’ll either cook separately for you or we’ll all eat the ‘Tom’ version either way you won’t miss out. You said he liked a challenge”

Toms expression had lightened considerably “That’s a brilliant idea Darling, we can definitely plan something delicious tonight after dinner” it was then we realised we’d all finished eating and I quietly gathered the dirty dishes up and took them to the kitchen. Lizzie quickly got the unspoken hint and joined in enthusiastically. I found a small food bag in one of the drawers and put a couple of the fresh muffins in it. When everything was cleared away I grabbed Tom’s hand again and we said our ‘so longs’ to the rest of our little group. I’d had an idea last night whilst walking along the stream and now seemed the perfect time to put it into action. Tom came with me willingly enough but seemed surprised when we didn’t go back to the bunk house.

“Where are we going Darling?” he asked as we carried on down the track towards the stream again.

“This way” I said simply and carried on walking “You said something last night about how you enjoy the simple things sometimes so I hope we can find something simple to do” we retraced out steps from last night along the banks of the stream and it looked even prettier in full daylight. The water was crystal clear and the sunlight glistened and sparkled off the ripples as the water ran over the stones and pebbles that made up the stream bed. After a short while the stream got deeper and as we rounded a bend I saw exactly what I was looking for. Up ahead was a bridge and as we got closer I realised it would suit my purposes perfectly. It was nice and wide but not too far above the water. I started looking around for twigs or small sticks that may have fallen off the trees that lined the stream. Tom looked confused as I stopped walking and bent to pick up a small handful. He helped me but I could see he had no clue what I was up to. Eventually curiosity got the better of him.

“Darling, what do we need the twigs for?”

I looked at him, surprised he hadn’t worked it out yet. “We’re going to play Poohsticks” I explained.

“What’s that?” said Tom. I looked at him quickly to see if he was teasing. Being the brilliant actor that he was and also full of fun I wouldn’t put it past him to try and make out that he didn’t know what I was on about but a quick glance at his eyes, which always told me the truth revealed that he wasn’t joking, he genuinely didn’t know what I was on about and I suddenly felt sorry for him.

“You must have played Poohsticks!” I said aghast “You know Winnie-the-Pooh, Christopher Robin, and The Hundred Acre Wood?”

“All passed me by I’m afraid” was his response.

“How on earth did you manage that!?” I was perplexed, the World of Pooh was something I’d grown up with, it was my preferred bed time story read to me by my dad who never bothered with the voices but it didn’t matter, and Poohsticks was a must play any time we found a bridge over running water and had five minutes to spare.

He shrugged “I was at boarding school from the age of seven, no streams there, family holidays don’t seem to have gone to the right places and after I was thirteen….” He tailed off; there was no need to say anymore I knew what had happened to his family when he was thirteen.

“Well then” I said chirpily, trying to lighten the mood “It’s high time you learnt” and I handed him some of the twigs, standing in the middle of the bridge I checked the flow of the water and moved to the upstream side, Tom coming to stand next to me. “What do we do now?” he asked, still full of curiosity as I’d hoped he would be.

“Pick a twig” I started “One that has a recognisable feature on it, such as a twist or nodule on one side” Tom and I examined out twigs and picked one each. “Then we stand by the guard rails with our hands in front of us holding our twig. Then on a given signal which will probably be one of us saying ‘go’ we drop our twigs and they race under the bridge. The winner is the person whose twig comes out from under the bridge first”

“Seems pretty straight forward” Tom commented “What does the winner get?”

“I don’t know” I responded “we never used to play for prizes, just for fun”

“Well how about the winner gets a kiss from the loser” Tom suggested.

“Sounds like a plan” I said. Really it was a great idea, win or lose we’d get something we both liked. “Ready then?” I asked and in answer Tom stood on the upstream side of the bridge, twig is his outstretched hand. I tried to match the height of my hand to his to make the race fair which meant I was nearly on my tip toes. When out twigs were level I said ‘go’ and we dropped them into the water. We ran across the bridge and stared intently over the edge to see whose twig won, and to his obvious delight Tom’s twig came out ahead of mine, but not by much. His eyes were brighter than I’d seen them since coming to America and his beautiful wide smile was back in place. He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me in for his victor’s kiss, which was as sweet, loving and tender as any I’d ever had.

“Thank you” he murmured against my lips “Thank you for coming all this way”

“I will always try and be here for you Love” I replied “you only have to ask and if I can’t be with you in person I want you to know that you can ring me at any time, day or night and I will be at the other end of the phone for you”

“Oh Darling, you don’t know how much that means to me” he said softly. I decided not to try and find out why. As far as I was concerned this support was part of the whole marriage deal. What sort of wife would I be if I didn’t support my husband, no matter whom he was and it hurt to think that anyone in a relationship wouldn’t do the same? To take my mind off these sombre thoughts I asked Tom if he wanted another go at Poohsticks. I got a very enthusiastic “Yes please” and he raced to his position on the upstream side of the bridge. I won the next couple of rounds and Tom was as generous in defeat as he was at winning. We ended up honours even when we’d run out of twigs and sticks and I was fairly confident that my plan to get Tom to think of something other than the next day was successful. “That” he said round one of his trademark beaming smiles “was great fun. We will be doing that again”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it” I said sincerely “you can play it with leaves too if you have no twigs”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains word 100,00! No I can't believe it either, if you'd told me it was going to be this long when I started I would not have believed you but here we are. There is plenty more to come so please continue to read, enjoy, comment and leave kudos


	82. Chapter 82

We then decided it was time to head back to the bunk house where I had more ideas of how to keep Tom distracted from the next day. I’d brought the Wedding book with me and we spent a considerable amount of time formalising and finalising the things we could do for our big day. Checking the joint email together showed us that most of our guests had replied in the positive and it was lovely to know that we would have so many family and friends around us on our special day.

            After a quick text to Luke and Lizzie to see if they were busy we decided that it would also be a good idea to start thinking about what we actually wanted for the meet and greet. Luke and Lizzie were only too please to come down to the bunk house and with Tom and Luke telling us what they could manage and Lizzie and I putting forward what we thought fan expectations may be we concocted a plan. It was decided that two evenings of three hours each, starting at five in the evening would probably be sufficient to cater for all the fans that would turn up. We were lucky as it seemed that what Tom thought he and the rest of the stars would be able to manage matched almost perfectly what Lizzie and I thought the fans would like. We settled on lines of tables canted at an angle into the room and a sort of one way system so that movement around the room would be easy for everyone, because we had to take into account that some of our celebrities would be more popular than others. I privately predicted that Benedict, Hems, and Tom would be the busiest.

            The part I still hadn’t figured out how we were going to do was get the word out about it. I realised that an opportunity like this was very rare but I also didn’t want it to cause transport and accommodation problems as that was the reason we were doing it in Wiltshire to start with. We decided, in the end, that Tom would record a short message and tweet it and we’d get Ben to do the same, directing fans to a website set up by Luke, where they could find more details. I was worried about ticket touts as I really didn’t want people paying more than the face value for the tickets so we came up with a verification process to try and ensure that only genuine fans got the tickets when they went on sale. Luke promised us that it would all be watertight but that he’d be able to work on it better when he got back to London.

            By the time we’d done that it was almost time for the main evening meal so Lizzie and Luke went to freshen up leaving Tom and I to follow on behind. As soon as they’d left I turned to Tom “Are you sure you’re alright with the meet and greet?” I asked

“Of course I am Darling” came the response “why wouldn’t I be? We’ve got a brilliant opportunity to raise funds for UNICEF, whilst giving our fans an evening they will never forget, and at the end of it all I’ve got a wedding to look forward to. Now stop being silly and go and freshen up for dinner” Laughing I turned to go and then turned back again “You would tell me though? If you weren’t happy about any aspect of it wouldn’t you?”

“Yes my Darling I would. It seems I can hide surprises from you quite easily but when it comes to my emotions apparently, to you, I’m an open book. So I promise I’ll always be honest with you about those sorts of things”

Satisfied for now I went to get changed into something slightly smarter than the jeans and blouse I’d been wearing all day. As soon as I was finished in the bathroom Tom was in there for a quick shower and he changed into smart trousers and his usual white shirt, looking heavenly as always. I’d opted for a purple ombre long flowing skirt and a white gypsy top with matching purple embroidery and my favourite gladiator sandals. Tom looked at me appreciatively when he laid eyes on me again “You look lovely” he said sincerely.

“Thanks” I replied “you don’t look so bad yourself”

He blushed slightly and I was glad that he’d relaxed enough in the last day and a half to truly be himself again. I was confident filming would go well now and I was really looking forward to watching the process that so far I’d only seen the end results of.

            Dinner in the main house was a jolly affair as everybody was suddenly much more relaxed. Rodney took me aside after the meal and asked me how I’d done it and looked at me completely bewildered when I told him about Poohsticks “Are you seriously tellin’ me that all it took was some twigs and runnin’ water?” I nodded smiling “Well Jackie, I can see why he loves you” was all he could say.

“Well you’ve done the hard part Rodney, you’ve taught him how to sing and play like Hank and you’ve already laid down the tracks for the soundtrack Tom was telling me?”

“Yep”

“And you’ve done all that in six weeks including Tom coming home for a long weekend?”

“Yep”

“Now that’s impressive. I mean I know how hard he was practicing before he left but then he had no one to correct him. I can’t wait to hear the finished product” I said sincerely

“Well thank you ma’am” Rodney said with a twinkle in his eye “I sure hope you’re not disappointed!”

“With Tom? Never!” I said smiling. We re-joined the others then and spent a happy evening playing board games.

            Tom and I didn’t go back to the bunk house until it was dark, even though we knew he had a fairly early call in the morning as it was the first day of filming and there would probably be a few last minute hitches to sort out. Rodney lent us a flashlight and reminded us to set our alarms.

            As we went through our night time routine I could see Tom getting slightly nervous again. Before I had a chance to say anything he turned to me, his face full of worry and said “You will be coming with me tomorrow won’t you?”

“Yes Love” I assured him “Rodney got us V.I.P. passes; we can come and go as we please. And I wouldn’t let you go on your own seeing as I’m here. And besides all that, no way am I passing up the chance to go on a movie set. It’s so exciting!”

His face smoothed out into a smile “You won’t be saying that when you’ve been there for hours and nothing has really happened” he said. I drew myself up to my full height and said loftily “That’s a chance I’m willing to take!” he outright laughed at me then, head thrown back in true Tom style “You’re so silly!” he said when he’d calmed down somewhat.

“Worked though didn’t it?” I smirked “You’re not worried about tomorrow anymore are you?”

“Not about the filming” Tom agreed “What people will think of you if you carry on acting like that?” and he rocked his hand side to side in the time honoured gesture for *I’m not sure*

“If acting like that makes you smile and stop worrying I don’t care” I said honestly “I’m only here for a week and you have to be into your stride before I leave so I’m afraid it’s a case of needs must when the Devil drives” Suddenly I was in Tom’s arms and he was hugging me so tight it nearly hurt, it was definitely uncomfortable to breathe.

“Oh God, I love you!” he exclaimed “However did I manage before?” he pulled away slightly allowing me to breathe once more.

“You’ve never had a part like this before” I said gently “where you have been subjected to harsh public scrutiny before you’ve even filmed a scene. All you can do is give it your best, like I know you will, and prove those nay sayers wrong”

“You are incredible” he said reverently “If you didn’t have Lizzie I’d never let you go home. I’d keep you by my side forever!”

“If I didn’t have Lizzie I probably wouldn’t be able to say the things I do. Part of being a parent is knowing what to say when things aren’t going so great and persuading your child to face their problems” I stopped then and gave him a very tender smile “I guess my little family has grown by one, now I’ve got two children!”

“Hey!” he said trying to look shocked but managing more amused “Are you saying I’m a child?”

“Maybe” I shrugged “it works and you really should see yourself sometimes, you can be very childlike” he pouted and I giggled “See?”

“OK, OK” he laughed “Point taken! Anyway come on its bed time. We’ve got an early start and a potentially long day ahead of us tomorrow so we need to sleep” With that he climbed into bed. I followed and we settled into our usual sleep position quickly. A ‘goodnight' kiss that may have been slightly longer than the norm and we closed our eyes and slept.


	83. Chapter 83

The next morning arrived far too soon as our alarms rang five minutes apart. We hadn’t moved much in our sleep so it was easy for Tom to lean towards me and give me a kiss.

“Morning Darling, are you ready for this?”

“I am” I replied “The question is, are you?”

He thought for a moment “Do you know I think I am” he said with a small amount of caution.

“Well then” I said “Up and at them”

He smiled at me and said “After you in the shower then!” I got out of bed and went through my morning routine. Looking out of the window it seemed at this early point that it might be a lovely day so I dressed accordingly in one of my favourite long flowing skirts and a pretty blouse, with a cardigan in case it got cold. Tom wore smart trousers, white shirt and a waistcoat, wanting to look smart but not overheat in the process.

            When we were ready we headed up to the main house, Tom holding my hand, his grip relaxed so I was confident he’d be OK. Entering the main house via the back door we met Lizzie and Luke who’d just put the kettle on for a cup of coffee. Once we were all sorted with a hot drink Tom tried to tell us what to expect from the day. He basically described it as a lot of hurry up and waiting. I could see Lizzie’s eyes shining with excitement and I hoped she wouldn’t find it too boring. Tom had received his shooting schedule for the first week whilst he was still in Nashville and he told us we were going to see him sing today, possibly twice depending on how the day progressed. I found it really exciting that Tom would have an early chance to get his Hank performance on tape and so hopefully settle his nerves even more. As Tom explained the various processes that would happen that day I could hear him get more and more enthused about the day ahead. He was using his hands to express himself quite a lot and I knew that was a good sign. I chanced a glance at Luke to see how he was reacting to Tom’s lively description of the day to come and was gratified to receive a wink and smile from him over the lip of his cup, he was no longer worried either and he knew ‘Actor Tom’ better than any of us. I decided if Luke wasn’t worried I wouldn’t be either and just enjoy the day.

            The car and driver hired to ferry Tom to the various locations in the city for the filming turned up bang on time and we gulped down the las of our coffee and headed to the front of the house. Claudia has kindly volunteered to drive Lizzie and Luke around wherever they wanted to go. Rodney would be going on set with Tom most days so she was happy to play hostess to them on days they didn’t join Tom and I. For today then Tom and I would travel with the studio driver and Rodney, Luke and Lizzie would follow a short while later.

            Tom and I headed out of the house to greet our driver. He told us his name was Vince and he’d been assigned to Tom for the duration of the shoot. The two men shook hands and Tom opened the back door for me and helped me get settled. Once we were both comfortable Vince set off. It seemed really odd to me to have the driver sitting on the ‘wrong’ side of the car and it took some time to get used to how road intersections worked. Actually in the end I stopped trying to work it out and just enjoyed the drive instead. It didn’t take long to get to the day’s location, which was a small bar on the outskirts of the city. The building was surrounded by large trucks and trailers with a few tents and marquees for good measure. I supposed the tents would be slightly easier to move from location to location instead of portable cabins and would possibly be a bit cooler too if there was any breeze           

            There was, of course, a security cordon set up around the perimeter of the set and Vince took us right up to the only entrance. The guards asked to see our passes and we were waved through with a smile. Vince pulled into a small parking lot and we got out. Claudia and Rodney were soon parking beside us and our little party was back together. A young man came up to us and introduced himself as Travis and told us he would be Tom’s personal assistant for the duration of the shoot. He was obviously excited to be working for Tom and quickly led us to Tom’s trailer, which wasn’t as big as I thought it would be. The inside was clean and tidy and basically split into two areas, there was a large seating area with bench seats, a small table and chairs, and a TV screen on one wall, and the other area had a small toilet, a largish shower and a small wardrobe. Just the basic amenities really but Travis explained that all food was being provided by an outside caterer, though there were drink making facilities and a small fridge in the trailer. He then gave us a brief guided tour of the set, pointing out the make-up and wardrobe areas and the large marquee that would hold group meetings and be the main eating hall.

            The tour ended there and we joined the queue for breakfast. Apparently our V.I.P passes that Rodney had procured for us were good for food here too which was a relief. Mindful of my pledge to try and stick to Tom’s diet as much as possible I chose a fruit salad and yoghurt for breakfast (after first checking the salad for any oranges of course!) Tom picked a slightly more filling breakfast than I thought he would but then he explained that he’d need the extra energy now he was actually filming. Travis was there again when we’d finished eating to tell Tom and Rodney that there was a meeting for the cast and crew in ten minutes and that he would escort Claudia, Luke, Lizzie and I back to Tom’s trailer to wait for him.


	84. Chapter 84

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to say, really, that I know this is not how you prepare and film a movie, but hey this works better for my story, so I hope you don't mind.

            Tom was back after about twenty minutes and told us it was time for him to go to make-up and wardrobe. He particularly wanted me to be with him for this bit as I would then meet his make-up artist and wardrobe assistant and he thought it was important for me to meet the ladies who would see more of him, in every sense, than I would over the coming months. Leaving Lizzie and Luke behind with Claudia we followed Travis through the maze of tents and trailers to make-up and wardrobe which were next to each other. We went to the make-up trailer first, Travis knocked politely and opened the door when a faint ‘come in’ was heard from inside. Tom and I followed him up the small steps into the interior which was brightly lit. In front of us, down one of the long sides of the trailer were three of four large comfortable swivel chairs in front of a bank of well-lit mirrors. There was already a lady in one of the chairs having her make-up done. Tom, without a moment’s hesitation, went up and said hello.

            The lady turned out to be Elisabeth Olsen, the actress who would play opposite Tom’s Hank as his first wife, Audrey, she stood quickly, obviously pleased to see Tom and they exchanged kisses on the cheek and Tom, being Tom and a big hugger gave her a hug as well. He then introduced me to Elizabeth. She looked at me warmly and said simply “So you’re Jackie? How do you put up with him?” pointing at Tom. I was taken aback, how do you answer that question from someone you’ve never met before? I shrugged and said “Oh, he’s not so bad really, just feed him cake and biscuits when he’s allowed them and he’s as good as gold!”

            Elizabeth laughed as Tom stood there, shocked that I would say such a thing. In truth he was very level headed and down to earth but I knew how excited he’d been about this role, how it even shone through his nervousness at telling Lizzie and I that he had to go away filming, and I suspected he was acting a little out of character now that he was so close to filming, part of it must also have been over compensating for his nerves about what people would think about his portrayal of a country icon, the nerves that brought me here in the first place. At that moment a young woman with straight long blond hair approached our little group and held out her hand to Tom “Mr. Hiddleston, my name is Harri and I’ve been assigned to be your hair and make-up artist for the shoot. It’s a real honour to meet you” Tom gave her his best smile and took her offered hand; with a quick glance over to me he raised her hand to his lips and gave it a gentle kiss. Harri giggled softly and went a little pink. Tom dropped her hand, and using the same hand pulled me close.

“Harri, I’d like to introduce you to my fiancée, Jackie”

“Pleased to meet you” she said pleasantly.

“And I you” I replied “It will be nice to meet some of the people Tom will be working with over the next few months”

“Oh” said Harri “You’re not staying for the whole shoot?”

“No, only this week” I said.

“OK” she replied “I hope you have a great time”

“Thank you” I smiled warmly.

She turned to Tom “Now, Mr Hiddleston...”

“Oh please call me Tom” he interrupted

She smiled her pleasure “Now Tom, it’s only light make-up today but we will have to do something about your hair!”

I looked at Tom, his hair was just the same as it always was, maybe a little longer on top but I couldn’t see anything wrong with it. Tom obviously saw me looking and my puzzled expression and took pity on me “Hank’s hair was darker than mine, I haven’t had a chance to dye it yet, and he wore it slicked back”

“Oh” I said, feeling silly “of course, I see now”

Turning to Harri Tom said “What’s the plan then Harri?”

“Well” she responded “we need to dye your hair first and then Wardrobe I think, back to me for make-up and you’ll be good to go”

“Sounds fine” said Tom cheerfully “shall we make a start?”

Harri nodded and led Tom to a sink. The process was relatively quick and before long Harri was finished and Tom’s hair was probably three shades darker. It was then slicked back with Brycreem until it matched the reference photos pinned on the wall. When they were both satisfied Tom rose gracefully from the chair and walked over to me.

“What do you think?” he asked

“It suits you” I said “mind you, you seem to be able to wear your hair anyway you want and it still suits you, except maybe F Scott Fitzgerald”

Tom chuckled “Well I wasn’t too keen on that one either if you must know. Anyway we’d better head to Wardrobe now if we’re going to get anything done today” Taking my hand in his and with a cheeky “see you in a while” to Harri we headed out of the trailer and into the much larger one next door. Tom knocked politely and on hearing a faint ‘Come in’ opened the door and stepped inside. The interior was filled with rack upon rack of clothes, dresses for the ladies and suits, shirts and trousers for the men. There was one rack that seemed to be dedicated to stage costumes for Tom and Elizabeth and after casting a quick glance over them there were some I couldn’t wait to see Tom in. There were also shelving units full of hats, and others full of shoes and cowboy boots. I marvelled at the attention to detail, especially as I could see that some of the clothes looked really worn but I knew they had to be new.

            A head poked out from behind a rack of clothes and when she saw who was there, the whole body soon followed. “Ah Mr Hiddleston, nice to see you again”

“And you Wendy” Tom replied “You keeping well?”

“Yes, thanks” turning to me she smiled warmly and said “You must be Jackie?” I nodded and smiled, wondering how she knew who I was

“Tom speaks very highly of you” she continued “had trouble shutting him up some days”

Tom was studying the floor as if it held the secrets of the universe in it. He couldn’t meet my eye, so he couldn’t see how I was smiling tenderly at him. “Talk about me a lot do you?” I said softly.

“Maybe” he hedged “sometimes”. He raised his head slowly, eyes edging ever closer to my face. I held my expression in place; he needed to see how I felt about him discussing me with complete strangers. I was actually fine about it; if Wendy was the Wardrobe mistress she would have spent some considerable time with Tom already though how they’d managed that I had no idea. Tom’s gaze finally met mine and his posture relaxed as he saw my expression.

“Sorry” he offered in a small voice. I crossed the short distance to him and enveloped him in a hug as best as I could.

“No apology needed” I said “it’s fine”

He smiled then “I thought I might have overstepped the mark” he explained “I stuck to what’s already in the public domain though”

“Honestly Love, it’s fine, these people are going to be as close as you can get to family for the next couple of months or so. Of course you’re going to talk about people you have left behind. Now go see Wendy and get changed or else you may hold up the whole filming!” Looking suitably chagrined Tom hurried over to where Wendy was waiting for him with his costume. It was a pair of dark brown trousers, with a tan cowboy shirt; all the details picked out in cream piping, a pair of dark cowboy boots and a creamy Stetson finished off the ensemble. He took the clothes but left the hat and ducked into the changing room. Less than five minutes later the door opened but it wasn’t Tom who walked out; it was Hank, well Tom’s Hank anyway. I could see the difference straight away; in the way he carried himself, walking less gracefully than usual because of Hank’s spina bifida. The expression on his face was not one I’d seen before either and it was really difficult to describe. This was Hank at the start, aged 23 maybe 24 but the expression on his face was of a much older, wearier man who’d seen a lot of life and decided that the only way out was through the bottle, and I felt instantly sorry for the man before me.

Suddenly he straightened up and beamed at Wendy and I “That expression works for you guys then?”

We nodded in unison “If you were aiming for world weary young man, you nailed it!” I said

“Good” Tom replied happily “That’s perfect” he turned to Wendy “Are we all done here?”

“Yes Tom” she replied “better go back to Harri now for touch ups”

“Right” said Tom easily and taking my hand once more led me to the door of the trailer. I said goodbye to Wendy, having no doubt we’d see each other again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here I want to say thank you to all those who have stuck with me through a very flaky posting schedule, Hubby had his first two days back at work this week and he has two more next week so hopefully we are well on our way back to normalcy. He has also discovered our local Men in Shed group and that's where he is for 4 hours every Saturday, it's bliss!
> 
> Please feel free to comment :-) I don't bite, honest, and would love to know what you think of this story of mine


	85. Chapter 84

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've realised that my chapter numbering has gone slightly awry, I hope to fix this in the next couple of weeks, when I can get my head round it. the chapters won't be changing in any way but the numbers will make more sense.

Once inside the make-up trailer again Hari touched up Tom’s makeup, pleased that it took only minimal work to do. She then grabbed a medium sized cantilever tool box and said that we were ready to go to the set. When she saw the look of confusion on my face she explained “I’m Tom’s personal make-up artist for this film, if he’s on set and needs a touch up I need to be there, on hand so as not to delay filming any more than necessary. You’re welcome to stay with me and watch if you want, we won’t be in the way, and it’s more than my jobs worth to get in any shots uninvited”

Tom chuckled “Quite right too” he teased. We made our way to the set which was a large sparsely lit room designed to look like a bar, there were some little tables and a smallish stage area and lots of people milling around.

            We found Luke and Lizzie quite easily, helped by the fact that Tom was the tallest person in the room of course. Lizzie looked at Tom appraisingly and said “Well you look the part, I can’t wait to hear you sing, you’ll be brilliant. I know you will”

“Thank you for the vote of confidence Lizzie” he replied sincerely. Just then a man dressed in modern clothes came over and greeted him warmly.

“Tom, you all ready?”

“Oh, hello Marc, yes all set thanks, have you got just a minute?” Tom replied equally warmly.

“Sure Tom, no problem” At these words a familiar long arm pulled me closer and I was introduced to the director Marc Abraham. “It’s a pleasure to meet you Jackie” said Marc, speaking as warmly to me as he had to Tom.

“The pleasure is all mine, thank you for letting us come onto your set. We won’t get in the way I promise” I said carefully, wanting to make a good impression. Lizzie and Luke were then introduced and Marc and Tom moved off to discuss the scene. Harri came over to find me and it was my turn to do introductions. We moved out of the way of everybody to a quiet corner where we could still see all the action.

            Someone yelled “QUIET PLEASE” very loudly and all conversations stopped immediately as the set started a quick rehearsal. Harri was explaining very quietly to Lizzie Luke and I what was going on. I noticed Marc didn’t look too happy about something and I saw Tom looking my way thoughtfully, I wasn’t really surprised he knew where I was in relation to him, though I knew he hadn’t looked my way since he’d started rehearsing the scene. He turned to Marc and they had a quick conversation. The next thing I knew they were both in front of me looking hopeful. Marc took the initiative and asked a favour of me. “Jackie I was wondering if you could help us out? Three of our extras haven’t shown up and our crowd is looking a bit sparse. Would you, Luke and Lizzie like to stand in for them please?”

            I didn’t need to see Lizzie’s face to know the expression on it, the last time I’d seen her with that particular look on her face was when she’d really wanted to go to a friend’s house and for some reason I’d said ‘No’. When I looked at Luke he looked wary but resigned as though he knew the decision would be out of his hands. I thought about it for a short while. From what Tom had said the film would be out long after the wedding so there was a good chance that I would be more in the public eye by then but besides that, the chance to actually participate in the process that Tom enjoyed so much was irresistible. I nodded at Marc and Tom “Yes I think we can help you out Marc” I said happily as I heard Luke sigh on my left and I was enveloped in a massive hug from my right as Lizzie squealed in my ear

Tom leant forward and kissed me soundly “Thank you Darling” he said beaming at me

“No problem Love” I responded “though do we need to worry because Lizzie is only fifteen?”

Marc overheard us and was quick to allay my fears “it’s not a problem working wise Jackie and as for her being in a bar ‘underage’ I’ll get Harri to do her hair and make-up quickly and you’ll hardly recognise her when she’s done”

“OK, thank you” I said suddenly realising that whilst I was ready, though not necessarily looking forward to, more public exposure I still wasn’t sure about subjecting Lizzie to it all too soon. If she was made to look older and we sat in the shadows we should avoid that for a while longer though, Tom, I knew would understand my concerns and explain them to Marc better than I could so I would leave it to him.

            We were whisked off by Harri to Wendy’s trailer where dresses we found for Lizzie and I and a set of casual clothes were found for Luke, he was worried that he would be recognised but was persuaded that if he didn’t wear his glasses and wore a Stetson, nobody would recognise him and nobody would be looking for him anyway, only slightly mollified Luke grabbed his costume and disappeared to get changed. Lizzie and I got changed into our dresses and were hurried away to get our hair and makeup done.

            As promised Harri worked her magic and I hardly recognised either of us when she’d finished. Just as we were done Luke arrived, a quick change of hairstyle for him and he was done too. Perching his hat on his head he huffed and said “Come on them, let’s get this over with!”

I nudged his arm playfully “Oh don’t be like that Luke, haven’t you ever wondered what it’s really like to be Tom, here in front of proper movie cameras instead of just the ones that film awards ceremonies? Anyway I think it’s important for you to experience what your clients do, it will give you a better appreciation of a normal day for them”

“I suppose you’re right” Luke conceded as we made our way back to the set.

“Have you heard Tom sing yet?” I asked as we walked.

“No” Luke admitted “Not yet”

“Well I think you’ll be amazed” I replied “I heard him practicing at home and he was pretty good then. I’m interested to hear the changes Rodney has wrought”

When we re-entered the set we were directed to a table not too far from the stage but off to one side, a couple of bottles of beer were put on the table as props and we were told to have fun with it all. Tom was in position already and he gave us a quick wink as he rehearsed his fingering one last time. Marc shouted “ACTION” and Tom and the band launched into their rendition of ‘Honky Tonkin’. It wasn’t difficult to look like we were enjoying ourselves, Tom was brilliant! The tune was a real toe tapper and I could begin to see why so many people loved Hank. I was mesmerised by Tom’s performance, gone was the well-educated Englishman I knew so well and in his place was Tom’s version of Hank Williams, playing and singing like he’d been born to it. They played the whole song through and then all the principles stood around a monitor and checked the playback.

            Whilst the actors and director were occupied Luke turned to me in astonishment “I never realised Tom could sing and play like that! He’s really good!” I couldn’t help but agree with him. The hard work Tom had put in at home, and the even harder stuff he’d done with Rodney in the last six weeks or so had really paid dividends. He looked so comfortable playing Hank, even though the playing style itself looked uncomfortable due, again, to Hank’s undiagnosed spina bifida. Our small conversation was interrupted by the floor manager calling for quiet again and then Marc said that we were going to do the scene again but this time the emphasis would be on the audience reaction to the song so basically just do what we did the first time around.

            It was surprisingly easy to disregard the cameras when they swung in our direction and focus once more on the performance on stage. Everybody played really well and it was possible to forget we were making a film and just enjoy the music, so of course giving authentic audience reactions. The song was played through twice more in total giving the camera men the best chance to get all the shots they needed and then we set up for the scene where Hank is heckled by an irate patron, which was shot with two cameras and managed in one take. I was very impressed at how smoothly it seemed to be going. When Marc called ‘CUT’ Tom sauntered over and asked us what we thought. Luke surprisingly was the first to find his voice.

“Tom, mate, you’re really good!” was his forthright opinion “I had no idea you were that musically talented” Tom shrugged “Neither did I until I started on this! I mean I could play a little but this was a whole new level for me and it wouldn’t have gone half as well without Lizzie’s help and Jackie’s support” He turned to us then “Thank you both so very much” he said sincerely. Lizzie and I gave him identical shrugs and said in unison “No problem Tom” We all burst out laughing when we realised what we’d done garnering us a few strange looks from the cast and crew who were still loitering, waiting to see what was next on the schedule for the day.


	86. Chapter 85

            Next turned out to be lunch and Lizzie, Luke and I hurried over to the wardrobe trailer to return our borrowed costumes to Wendy. Tom said he’d catch us up shortly and went to have a word with Marc. He turned up just as we were finished getting changed and handing the costumes back, a rather smug look on his face, though he refused to be drawn as to the cause of his smugness. I knew we’d find out all in good time anyway, Tom was good at keeping secrets, that much was true, but not so good at keeping them forever especially if they didn’t pertain to any upcoming projects. He also knew us well enough to know that anything he told us about forthcoming stuff was safe with us until Luke gave us the go-ahead to say something. Lizzie and I were actually better at keeping secrets than Tom in that regard, he generally couldn’t wait to tell us about projects he was interested in and then we’d keep completely quiet about it, knowing that it was a subject of conversation only if we were completely alone. I mulled all this over in my head as we made our way through the maze of trailers and marquees to the commissary where we’d had breakfast earlier.

            There looked to be an interesting array of sandwiches on offer along with some hot snacks. After careful consideration I opted for a tuna crunch sandwich on seeded bread that was really fresh and delicious. Lunch over it was time for Tm to get ready for his next scenes, Lizzie and Luke went to find somewhere discrete to watch the action from and I, of course went with Tom. I was happy to take Harri up on her offer to stay with her whilst Tom was filming as then he would always know roughly where I was if he needed me, though based on current evidence I wasn’t really sure what he’d been worried about. The only extra takes we’d had to do had been planned for different camera angles, Tom hadn’t put a foot wrong yet and based on how comfortable he was looking I didn’t expect him to either. Back in Wendy’s trailer Tom got changed quickly for his next scene and we trotted back to Harri’s trailer so she could check his make-up. When she was satisfied we all headed back to the set.

            To my surprise Marc called me over and invited me to watch the next piece of filming with him. I accepted of course, Marc was being so generous to us it would be churlish to refuse. Somebody found me a chair and placed it next to Mar as the actors rehearsed the next scene, he explained to me what he was looking for and why he wanted it. The whole day was truly fascinating, I had no idea how much work went into even the shortest piece of filming but I knew now why Tom would be away for so long. As I’d predicted Tom was spot on most of the time with only a few minor hiccups along the way. During a short break in filming Tom took me to see his dietician and left me there so he and I spent a good hour trying to work out a menu for the coming Friday that was either OK for Tom to eat or easy to adapt for him. Luckily because Tom was now filming he had to be able to call on extra reserves of energy as it is a long, tiring process, so this meant he could actually eat a little more and not be quite as strict with himself this week as he didn’t have to be at his lightest for some while yet. We settled on a menu that consisted of Chilled Tomato and Red Pepper soup to start, Traditional Cottage Pie with a sweet potato topping and Raspberry Eton Mess, which was actually the only thing I’d have to adapt for Tom.

            Armed with my recipes, or at least links to websites hosting them I thanked the dietician and made my way back to where the main filming was going on just in time for them to start the last scene of the day. When that one was in the can Marc thanked us all and wished us a good evening. We all relaxed and smiled at each other. Tom was by my side in a few seconds and Lizzie and Luke were not far behind him.

“That” Tom said beaming at me “was the best first day of filming I’ve ever had. I’ve never known a day go so smoothly, you must be a good luck charm!”

I smiled at him, privately thinking he was talking nonsense, I’d done nothing special, just hung around all day and tried not to get in the way. When I tried to point that out to Tom he wouldn’t hear my argument and insisted that the smoothness of the day was all down to my presence on set. Realising somewhat belatedly that Tom wasn’t going to be swayed and that actors are well known for being very superstitious I let the subject drop after finally agreeing with Tom, just to keep him quiet.

            We walked hand in hand back to Wendy’s domain where Tom divested himself of his costume and put on his own clothes again. Once his costume was safely delivered into Wendy’s waiting hands I was pulled into a full Hiddles Hug which soon encompassed Luke and Lizzie as well. Tom was obviously pleased that the day had gone well and was full of high spirits on our way back to our rented accommodation, not even Rodney reminding him that he had a run to fit in before food could dampen his enthusiasm. He quickly decided that as he was still on a high after a brilliant first day he’d change and go for his run as soon as we got back to base. It would still be light for a couple of hours yet, the day’s filming not being overly long. I then decided that I’d go on up to the main house whilst Tom was running, partly to help Claudia cook the evening meal and partly to enlist her help for Friday night. Plans made we headed off home in good spirits. When we got back to the ranch Tom and I walked briskly back to the little bunk house we were calling home for the next week as I wanted a quick freshen up and to change my clothes for the meal ahead. Tom would obviously have a shower and get changed before joining us for the evening. We walked up to the main house toether, Tom fiddling with his iPod on the way.

“What are you going to listen to?” I said by way of conversation “Got any new bands from here yet?” I grabed an earbud out of his hand and put it up to my ear, expecting at the very least to hear some of the old country songs that playing Hank had inevitably introduced him to but I was really surprised when I heard Tom’s voice I my ear. As I listened I realised that it was dialogue from the scenes he’d finished that day and I remembered hearing from one of his many interviews how he can only learn his lines whilst on the move and then a quick read through the night before was generally enough to cement them in place for as long as they were needed. He’d obviously recorded hoimself reading his lines and was using his run to finalise them for tomorrow. I handed back the earbud feeling a bit silly.

“Does it feel strange?” I asked

“Does what feel strange?” Tom replied

“Hearing your own voice coming out of your iPod” I explained

He shook his head “Not anymore, besides it seems to work and I’m not one to fix something that isn’t broken”

“I don’t blame you” I said and then the metaphorical light went on “Is that how you did that scene in Henry IV: you know the one where you are playing the King on his throne and Falstaff is playing you?

He nodded, chuckling at the memory “Jeremy kindly offered to record it for me so all I had to do was mimic him. It was easy.”

“I wondered how you captured him quite so well” I said “even though I know you’re very good at impressions”

“Why thank you, kind Lady” he said in the unmistakable tones of the brilliant Jeremy Irons and we both burst out laughing. When we were both back under control I sent him on his run so he could learn his lines for the next day.

When I entered the house I made straight for the kitchen where, as I hoped, I found Claudia just about to start cooking the evening meal. She tried to brush away my offer of help but relented when I put a proposition to her. I already knew that Tom wanted to take me at least me, but probably all of us out for a meal one night. Having had a look at the week’s shooting schedule it looked like Wednesday or Thursday were the two possibilities. I was cooking on Friday which left three nights to cater for including the day we were on. I suggested to Claudia that we swap some recipes, I could teach her some English dishes and she could teach me some American ones. I enjoyed cooking and thought learning new recipes would be fun and a nice way to remember this trip abroad. Claudia readily agreed and proceeded to teach me some classic American dishes including a couple that she knew Tom liked and were very healthy. I knew our local big supermarket was beginning to stock more American items so I hoped I’d be able to recreate a dish or two at home eventually.


	87. Chapter 87

Whilst I was busy peeling sweet potatoes and unbeknownst to me, Tom snuck into the kitchen having finished his run and had his usual shower. The first I knew of his presence was when a long pair of familiar arms crept around my waist from behind me and a voice started singing softly in my ear “Hey good looking, whatcha got cooking? How’s about cooking something up with me?” I gasped as he spun me around, grinning like an idiot.

“You didn’t really just do that!” I exclaimed “I mean, how cheesy?!”

He wasn’t apologetic at all. “It was too good an opportunity to miss” he said nonchalantly, though his eyes were bright with mischief.

“Well now you’re here you can help” said Claudia briskly “Those salad leaves need rinsing please and that cucumber and celery can be washed too” Tom immediately let go of me and after a quick kiss on the cheek went to do his allotted job at the sink, smiling all the time but still humming under his breath. Claudia and I exchanged a look behind his back one that spoke volumes about the men in our respective lives and their childlike demeanour sometimes. I was really happy that Tom still seemed cheerful though; a first day of filming with very few problems seemed to be just what he needed to settle his nerves completely. The spontaneous rounds of applause he’d gotten when he’d finished each scene, especially the singing ones had helped immensely too.

            Tom announced that the salad leaves and the other vegetables were washed. Claudia thanked him and asked him to set the table. I smiled to myself as I saw sugar and vinegar go out on the table and called Lizzie to help Tom. He’d worked very hard today and had a lot more hard work to come and although laying the table wasn’t an onerous task it wouldn’t hurt for Lizzie to help. In no time at all we were sitting down for our meal. Along with the salad there was some succulent looking grilled chicken and sweet potato and butternut squash wedges which I’d never seen done like that before and were really delicious.

            Tom and I giggled as we both reached for the sugar at the same time causing Lizzie to raise an eyebrow at us until she realised what we were doing and then she joined in with the laughter, and the salad dressing. The meal was a convivial affair with Rodney full of praise for Tom’s efforts during filming and the rest of us chatting about our little bit of filming too. After we’d finished eating and had cleared all the dirty dishes away Tom announced he had a surprise for us all. We followed him into the lounge where the television was, sat down, and watched bemused as he inserted a plain DVD into the player and started the payback. As the screen cleared he came to sit by me and put his arm around my shoulders “This is just for you” he whispered in my ear. I watched in surprise as the scene from the bar began to play and the camera panned around the audience. There we were Lizzie, Luke, and myself, large as life and obviously enjoying Tom’s rendition of ‘Honky Tonkin’. As Marc and Harri had promised Lizzie looked a lot older than her fifteen years which I was pleased about. The scene over I expected the screen to go blank but there was a further surprise: Honky Tonkin’ again but this time solely focussed on Tom and the band. It was really interesting to see how what we’d done that day translated into film. When the song was finished Tom got up, ejected the disc and turned off the player. Inserting the disc back into its case he made a show of presenting it to me. “I don’t need to tell you how sensitive this is” he said, suddenly serious “but I wanted you to have a copy of your starring role, in case you end up on the cutting room floor!” I was taken aback and momentarily lost for words, mostly to do with the fact that my throat had closed over as the significance of Tom’s gift hit me. I knew the film had to be edited after it was finished and so we were a long way from a release date, which was slated for November 2015 at this point in time so to have some of the raw footage was a great privilege.

            I finally found my voice “I don’t know what to say, Thank you Tom for organising this. I promise that no one outside this room shall see it before the film is released”

“You are more than welcome Darling, and it’s me that should be thanking you, for putting your life on hold and flying all this way to support me when I needed it. I know you don’t think it but you‘ve really made a difference to me this weekend” I could hear Rodney, Claudia and Luke all adding their confirmation of that fact as Tom spoke.

“Oh Love” I responded a little shakily “of course I will be with you if you need me. I’m going to be your wife and I’m not going to shirk my responsibilities, though it may need a little more planning next time” I smiled softly to take any sting out of my words. He pinked up slightly “Well maybe I’ll just have it written into my contracts that, whenever possible, you will accompany me for the first week of filming!” I stole a glance at Linzie and Luke who were nodding enthusiastically at Tom’s words and said simply “Well depending on Lizzie’s education schedule, maybe I’ll let you!” Tom’s face lit up with his trademark grin which was so infectious that we were all smiling like loons within seconds. I didn’t mind. I was being totally honest, if Tom needed me and it was in my power to be there for him I would go anywhere. I knew if the positions were reversed he’d do the same for me and actually I had hard evidence. My birthday weekend in Bath was still a fresh memory and the lengths Tom went to to be there for me would not be forgotten in a hurry.

            Luke was once more nodding his approval at my words and in that moment I knew he knew he had a powerful ally in me, someone else who had Tom’s best interests at heart but also someone else close to Tom who he’d listen to. Lizzie, typical teenager, was nearly beside herself at the thought of getting to go to some exotic places as we travelled with Tom for work though I hope she understood that there would be no time out of school for her. She had just started her last year at secondary school and her ‘big’ exams were just seven months away. It was the reason Tom would be Wiltshire based for the first part of the following year, Lizzie’s education came first for both of us, though we would be researching London college opportunities for her when we got home as it made more sense for Tom to be London based when he was in England.

            I suddenly let out a huge yawn that everybody noticed, even though I tried to stifle it. I hadn’t realised how tired I was but I was absolutely shattered. Smiling gently Tom stood up and helped me to my feet. Addressing the others he said “Well. If you will excuse us, I think I’m going to take my tired lady to bed before she falls asleep on the sofa. Goodnight all” we all chorused ‘Goodnight’ to everybody. Tom then turned to me and put his arm around my waist “Come on Darling” he said tenderly “It’s time to get you to bed I think” Another big yawn escaped me then so I was in no position to argue so, wrapping my arm around his waist we made our way to our little bunk house.

“How are you not tired?” I asked him as we walked.

“Well” he answered carefully “I’m more used to early starts and late finishes than you I suppose and I suspect you’ve worn yourself out slightly worrying about me again. But you can see there’s no need for that anymore!”

I nodded slightly, though in my heart of hearts I knew that I’d only properly stop worrying about Tom when filming was finished and he was home and that wouldn’t be for another couple of months yet.

            I was practically asleep on my feet by the time I was in our little house, the thought of how close I was to being able to sleep making my tiredness so much worse. Tom didn’t actually have to help me get ready for bed, but it was a close run thing. I managed my night time routine on auto pilot and was snuggling under the covers as Tom entered the bathroom for his nightly ablutions. I managed to stay awake until he got into bed and wrapped me up in his long limbs as usual. After a lingering kiss that was more adoration than anything else we settled down to sleep.


	88. Chapter 87

            I spent every day of that week on set with Tom. Harri and I became firm friends and had exchanged email addresses by the end of the second day. Elizabeth was very friendly too and, although she was in a lot of the early scenes and so quite busy; when she wasn’t filming she hung around with us. Tom was, of course, delighted that we got on so well, his days varied in length depending on the shooting schedule and he was happy that I had someone to talk to when he was busy. Claudia kindly kept Lizzie and Luke entertained whilst I was on set with Tom on the days they didn’t come with us.

            I wanted to stitch Tom a little good luck charm, something he could fold up and hide in a handy pocket so that he would know I was always thinking about him, but we were never apart long enough for me to really do that. I did however come up with a compromise. I sent Lizzie and Luke into town with Claudia one day to buy something suitable and they really came up trumps. They managed to find a four leaf clover set in a round Perspex mount that was only about 2cm in diameter, just the right size to fit in a pocket and slim enough not to show if the garment being worn was a little tight. Lizzie managed to show me it whilst Tom was on his run the day they bought it and it was perfect. She promised to keep it safe for me so that I could give it to Tom the day we went home.

            Filming seemed to be going really well, we seemed to be racing through scenes and Tom remained buoyant the whole week we were with him, he actually managed to finish early a couple of days and we spent the extra free time doing little bits and pieces for the wedding, or walking along the creek hand in hand, enjoying the solitude. We even managed our meal out, our hosts graciously declined Tom’s invitation so it was just the two of us that evening. Tom had managed to book a table at one of Shreveport’s swankiest restaurants so smart was the order of the day. Luckily I’d packed something suitable in the form of a new dress I’d bought but Tom hadn’t seen yet. It was dark green cotton with a three quarter length gathered skirt and the style was very appropriate as it was straight out of the 1950’s. Tom had to pop into the main house on his way back from his run to grab a suit because he hadn’t bothered bringing one down to the ranch house with him so I used the time wisely and made sure I was completely ready when he walked in the door, Hiddleston Pendant around my neck and little black clutch bag ready to go.

            I was in the living room when Tom walked in to get ready and he stopped in his tracks when he saw me.

“Wow” he breathed “You look divine!”

I always laughed when he came out with lines like that, I mean I was engaged to be married to the most beautiful man in the world and he thought I looked good (though I admit I did feel pretty special in that dress) I pushed him towards the bathroom so he could shower and change saying

“Well you’d better go and see if you can match me then!”

It only took him thirty minutes to prove to me once again that he always looked good in a suit. In a well fitted black three piece with patent leather shoes he looked as gorgeous as ever. On closer inspection though something was wrong with the image in front of me, and it took me a minute to figure out what was wrong. Tom’s shirt was buttoned all the way up to his collar but there was no tie.

“I wanted to know what you were wearing before I chose a tie” he explained “and now I know the perfect one, but it’s back at the main house”

“That’s no problem” I said happily “I wanted Lizzie to see me in this anyway”

Tom smiled lovingly at me as he held out his hand for me to hold as we made our way up to the main house. When we got there Tom disappeared quickly into his former room whilst I found the rest of our little ‘family’ in the main living room playing board games. All heads turned towards me as I entered but Lizzie was the first to jump up.

“You look radiant Mum” she exclaimed as she came towards me “that colour looks good on you. Where’s Tom?” she added as she looked behind me.

“He’s just grabbing himself a different tie” I explained as he came through the door. I could see why he had chosen the particular tie that now adorned his neck. It was exactly the same shade of green as my dress, though it was made from silk. As he joined me Lizzie shouted “Picture!!” and grabbed her phone out of her pocket so she could snap us together. She showed me when it was taken and I had to admit we did look good together.

            Tom checked his watch and turned to me “Time to go Darling” he said softly “our car will be here soon” Saying goodbye and goodnight to everybody we headed to the front porch. To my surprise there was a familiar car waiting there, it was Vince and the studio car. I looked at Tom who chuckled “Vince is my driver during the week Darling, whenever I want him, so he’s here to take us for our date.”

I waited whilst Tom did his usual opening the car door for me and I got in.

“Thank you for doing this Vince” I said as soon as I was settled and buckled in.

“It’s no problem Ma’am” was the immediate response “Mr. Hiddleston is a pleasure to drive for anytime”

Tom was in the car at this point and chided Vince gently “I told you to call me Tom, Vince. I really don’t mind.”

“Yes Mr. Hi… Tom, my apologies”

            The journey to the restaurant was a smooth one, thought I still couldn’t get used to American roads; it seemed like no time at all until we were pulling up outside a restaurant called Bella Fresca. Vince got out and opened the door for Tom who then helped me out of the car. Once I was on the pavement Tom turned to Vince once more.

“Now Vince” he started “are you sure you’re alright to come and pick us up later if I text you? I don’t want to spoil your evening”

Vince was quick with his reply “It’s fine Tom, really. It’s an honour to be your driver and I take my responsibilities seriously!”

Tom clapped him on the shoulder “I know you do Vince; we’ll see you later then.” With that Tom escorted me to the front door of the restaurant where we were greeted by a man who introduced himself as the Deputy Manager. He led us to our table, which was in a secluded nook of the restaurant to afford us some privacy, the table sported white linens and beautiful glasses and cutlery, a couple of candles and a small flower arrangement finished off the look.

            A young waiter turned up with the menus and was obviously somewhat star-stuck when he realised who he’d be waiting on that night. Tom immediately engaged him in a short conversation to put him at his ease and I marvelled again at how easy Tom seemed to find it to cope with fans and people who recognised him as a celebrity even if they weren’t aware of his body of work. It was only a matter of a couple of minutes before the waiter was at ease enough to talk us through the specials and any dishes we were unsure of. He took our order very carefully and I’m sure it was to ensure that everything was perfect for his illustrious customer. Once we were alone again we chatted about inconsequential stuff for a while. I was just over half way through my week in America and was really enjoying myself, helped I’m convinced by the fact that Tom’s insecurities seemed to have melted away since he had stepped onto set for the first time.

            Our meals arrived and we partook with great gusto. Tom had made sure to order dishes that wouldn’t impact on his diet regime and I’d thrown my personal promise to eat only what he did out of the window when faced with the menu choices, and I hoped he didn’t mind too much. We did decide to forego pudding though, which I was sure Tom minded more than I did. The food was delicious, cooked to perfection and served beautifully. It rivalled anything I’d had with Tom thus far and I was amazed at his ability to pick stunning restaurants for us to eat in with little or no pre knowledge of the establishment. It was a skill I hoped he’d continue to hone if I got to eat out like this every so often! Regrettably our plates were empty far too soon for our liking and with pudding being out of the question, Tom settled the bill and we headed out. Going to a local bar was also not an option as Tom would need a clear head in the morning for filming (it’s one thing to portray an alcoholic on film but to turn up for work smelling like one is very much frowned upon Tom told me) the calories consumed could not be justified and also, of course, my alcohol ‘intolerance’ as Tom liked to call it meant drinking was a ‘no no’ for me anyway. We opted in the end for a stroll around a couple of blocks of downtown Shreveport, with my decision to spend all day on set with Tom I hadn’t actually seen the city except for when we’d driven through it on our way to the ranch from the airport. Most of Tom’s filming so far had been relatively close to the ranch as well so there had been no opportunities to explore properly though I knew Lizzie, Luke and Claudia had done a bit of exploring together and had really enjoyed the sights and the sounds of the city, so different to London.

            We realised that we were in a very nice neighbourhood, full of smart shops and boutiques with the odd restaurant thrown in for good measure. It was really interesting to see how it differed from what I was used to but then, apart from the amount of tourists, Bath and London are as different as chalk and cheese as well so I really shouldn’t have been surprised. The shops were a bit more garish then I was used to with some displays so bright I wished I’d brought sunglasses with me. We didn’t stay looking in those windows for long but some of the boutiques were much more tasteful and I spent ages admiring a stunning dress that screamed ‘country music’ to me but still would look nice on and not too out of place if I wore it somewhere not too smart. It was made of black heavy cotton with chestnut brown corded panels, matching seam stitching and embroidery panels. It looked like it was fastened with poppers from the neck to the bottom of the three-quarter length full skirt and I loved it. I would have liked to try it on but the boutique was closed so I had to content myself with just imagining what it would look like and feel on. Tom, of course, noticed me looking intently at the dress and suggested that I come back when the shop was open before I went home to try it on, or maybe even buy it but I knew I wouldn’t have time between spending all day on the set with Tom and having to prepare for ‘English Night’ in two days’ time so I tried to persuade him I didn’t want it as much as I really did. He looked at me sceptically but said nothing.        

            Eventually it was time to go home and Tom text Vince with our location and he was there within five minutes and we were back on the ranch within fifteen minutes. The track to the bunk house was not wide enough for a car to drive down so we got out at the end of the track and used the lights on our phones to light the way to the front door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of the more observant of you may have noticed the chapter numbering is a bit awry, I am posting in order as you can probably tell, and I will go back and make sure the numbering makes sense as soon as I have the time. I hope you are not too confused :-)   
>  Thanks as always for reading, I would appreciate comments and will reply to every one :-)


	89. Chapter 88

            There was a big surprise waiting for me when we got to the set the next day. Next to Tom’s chair - you know, those movie type fold up ones with the name printed on the fabric at the back – was another one, in a different colour which is why it stood out. As we got closer I realised that the name printed on the back was mine! I turned to Tom in amazement only to see his face wreathed in a cheeky smile.

“You knew?!” I said accusingly

“Yes” he said unapologetically “I wanted you to have something special to remember this by and this seemed ideal”

“As if I could ever forget my first trip to a film set” I said softly “this week has given me a whole new appreciation for what you do. I knew it wasn’t all fun but didn’t realise just how hard you had to work to make it all seem effortless. I don’t think I’ll ever look at a film in the same way again”

“This week has been fun” he agreed “you wait until we film Ragnarok, we have such a hard time not corpsing the first week” his expression turned wistful “I hope you can be there”

“I hope so too” I said as I tried my chair for comfort. It was surprisingly comfortable considering there was no cushion or any form of padding “You might have trouble prising me out of this today. I never knew they were so comfortable”

“Oh, I have my ways” he said, an evil smile spreading over his face this time.

“Oooh, I’m so worried” I said sarcastically

“You should be Darling!” was the ominous reply. Immediately he finished speaking however he broke into a huge fit of the giggles, unable to keep the charade up any longer. I stood up and hugged him tightly “Thank you Tom, I love the chair” I said softly and then made my voice firmer, more commanding “Now come on, enough messing around. Off to Wendy and Harri with you or else we’ll never finish tonight” he pulled himself together somewhat and taking my hand in his led me to the trailers. The location had shifted during the week and we were now shooting scenes in and around the house that was standing in for Hank and Audrey’s home. I found it fascinating how they set up the shots to get the required filming done without getting any of the paraphernalia of filming in shot. It was very impressive, sometimes it took two takes but as us usual Tom was spot on most of the time. He was word perfect so sometimes the extra takes were just to perfect the nuances of the performances. Having watched the early parts of the film come together I was slightly worried that it lacked cohesion, thinking that audiences might think it disjointed but Tom’s performance shone above everything. I know I’m biased but I would say that even if I was *just* a fangirl and not his fiancée.

            When filming was over for the day it was a quick change for Tom and then back to the ranch, courtesy of Vince. It was still fairly early so I got to work in the main house preparing what I could for ‘English Night’ the following evening. The meringues for the Eton Mess had to be made straight after the evening meal as they were better cooked long and low but Claudia needed the oven for supper. Tom was going to help me after we’d eaten but obviously he had to check his lines for tomorrow as there were usually changes made as the script was refined according to the actor’s portrayal of their characters so he had opted to go to the bunk house for peace and quiet until we ate. It was a mark of just how much more comfortable Tom was with his portrayal that he didn’t feel the need to be constantly around me anymore, though to be fair he’d been much improved in that regard since the second day of filming. It was nice to feel needed but I was very glad that now he was obviously into his stride I could go back to England safe in the knowledge that he would be OK.

            The evening meal was the usual jolly affair. It really was like an extended family; some gentle teasing and banter the main points of conversation. Rodney still called Tom Sir Lonesome-a-Lot which caused us all to giggle and Tom to blush gently every time, especially as we knew he wasn’t lonesome at all. With his cheerful demeanour and easy going nature he found it easy to make friends. Keeping them beyond the end of the shoot though seemed harder though there were some, like Hems, who were firm friends from day one of their meeting.

            When the meal was all finished Tom and I took over the kitchen, we quickly washed up and put away and then started on preparations for the next day. Claudia had gone shopping for me with a huge long list and some cash and managed to get everything I needed, which made my life a lot easier. I started on the meringues, separating the eggs carefully, making sure no yolk got into the white and whisking them in a beautiful retro looking stand mixer. When the whites were at the stiff peak stage I carefully added some caster sugar and mixed it in thoroughly. I kept adding the sugar this way until it was all fully incorporated and the meringue mix was smooth with plenty of small bubbles. Tom lined a couple of baking sheets with some baking parchment for me and as the meringues did not need to look pretty as they would be crushed I let him put medium sized dollops on the paper and flatten them slightly whilst I started on the soup. I took some red peppers and deseeded and halved them before placing them under a hot grill to char the skin. I then put them hot into a plastic bag to sweat the skin off. A little onion and garlic were fried off in a large saucepan until soft. I deskinned and chopped the peppers whilst Tom chopped the tomatoes into chunks, the meringues having gone into a low oven for a long bake. The peppers and tomatoes were added to the onion and garlic and cooked over a medium heat for 10 minutes until all was soft, some white wine and vegetable stock was added and the whole lot simmered for 20minutes. Whilst the soup was simmering Tom and I peeled the vegetables for the cottage pie and left them in tubs of fresh water in the fridge overnight. Finally I blitzed the soup in a food processor, turning it into a lovely smooth liquid which also got stored in the fridge for the next evening. Tom had managed to get everything cleared away by the time I’d finished and we said our goodnights and made our way to the bunk house.

            As soon as we were on the path Tom spoke softly “I’ve missed that you know? Us in the kitchen making meals together. It’s nice to be able to do it again even if it’s a one off”

“Yeah” I replied “we make a good team don’t we?”

“We do” he agreed “and not just in the kitchen. You are so good for me. Your unwavering support is all that gets me through some days, knowing that if I need you you’ll be there for me”

I admit I was stunned by his words. He’d never mentioned struggling through his day before, even before this filming. He’d had a few small day jobs whilst we were together, when he was doing his play and I was still in Wiltshire, but he’d never actually called to say he was having a bad time over any of it and I wondered what had brought on this sudden need to bare his soul. I had a feeling that if I tried to pry though he’d be all reticent so I left well enough alone. After that declaration I knew that he’d tell me his reasons if and when he wanted to. When we reached the bunk house we went through our usual nightly routines and snuggled into bed together.


	90. Chapter 89

            The next day I woke up before Tom for a change and took the chance to drink in the sight of him sleeping. He looked so tranquil and relaxed it was a shame to wake him up but he had a reasonably full day of filming to get through before we could have our very special ‘family dinner’ as Rodney insisted on calling it, though Tom had promised to work hard and try and manage an early finish so we’d have more time to cook the meal.

            As it was our last full day in Shreveport Lizzie and Luke had decided to come to set for the day too so it took two cars with Claudia driving one to ferry us to that day’s location which was the building that would be the radio station Hank did his radio show from. When I saw it, it looked nothing like I expected though, it had a completely modern exterior and I wondered how on earth it could be made to look authentic enough for the film. My unease grew as Travis came and found us and led us to Harri. The corridors still looked far too modern and the room Harri had been assigned looked like it was bang up to date. She went through Tom’s usual make up routine and told us that Wendy was just next door which was handy. Tom quickly got into his costume and Travis was outside the costume department ready to lead us to the set.

            We headed into an obviously older part of the building and followed Travis through a wooden door with a red light above it and stepped straight back into the Fifties! I thought the attention to detail was amazing until Marc came up to us and explained that it was actually a studio from the era that had been kept as a sort of museum though it all still worked and the current radio station had not touched anything, to make sure that everything was authentic. Tom and I both looked around in awe before Marc called Tom’s attention to the tweaks on today’s shooting schedule. I’d learnt very quickly that although each day’s shooting was meticulously planned generally by the end of the day we were actually on Plan C or D and I’m sure one day we got to Plan F! I was no longer surprised to find my director’s chair next to Marc’s and debated about sitting in it for a while but the lure of talking to Harri was strong so I went and stood next to her first. As Tom had no doubt intended I got on really well with his make-up artist and by this point there wasn’t a lot she didn’t know about Tom and I, personal, private stuff I’d obviously kept to a minimum but the details that were already in the public domain or events that were just too good not to tell had been swapped including the engagement, of course and then Tom’s confession that he was so sure I’d agree that the parties were planned before he actually asked me. She knew about the trip home for my birthday though as she was meant to meet Tom and discuss hair styles and colours that weekend but obviously couldn’t though she was pleased that Tom had treated me so well. We’d already swapped email addresses and I was fairly confident that our friendship would last well after the end of filming.

            Everything seemed to be running smoothly that day and during lunch Tom confided in me that we were well over half way through that day’s schedule and so we should be fine for an earlish finish which I was pleased about. I spent the time after lunch sitting in my chair next to Marc. It was truly interesting to see the film through the eyes of the director as he tried to get what he could see in front of him to match the pictures in his head. Tom was really enjoying himself too. The expression on his face when he had to sing with Elizabeth wasn’t acting I know. The smile was as wide as possible without being too cheesy and I knew that over and above all the hard work Tom had put into this role and the filming, that even if it were to flop he’d look back on it as an enjoyable experience. It wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows though; Hank and Audrey’s relationship was tempestuous to say the least and Tom really got to show his abilities in a scene where Hank had to stand up for Audrey against his band, who though she couldn’t sing (which she couldn’t) He did it beautifully, I could see the anger simmering beneath the surface just as he intended and I realised it was something I never wanted to see in real life. The hurt he portrayed when Audrey rounded on him just after was also something I could live without seeing again. It dawned on me that the whole week had given me a totally new perspective on how much time and effort it took to look as natural as possible in front of the cameras and I had a new level of respect for Tom’s chosen profession and the people who’d chosen it as well.

            Thanks to the hard work of all the crew we did manage to finish earlier than originally planned, for which I was grateful. As I stood up from my chair for the last time I patted it fondly, yes I knew it was only a chair but it meant a lot to me, knowing that Tom and Marc had organised it for me and me alone. It was Marc who’d wanted Tom to play Hank for so long. He’d told me during a break in filming that he’d seen Tom in War Horse and one particular scene that involved Tom taking his cap off told him all he needed to know. All he had to do then was hope that a) Tom was available and b) Tom could sing and play! Luckily for Marc Tom rose to the challenge as only he could and his performance was breath-taking, the two men working closely together with Rodney to get the look and sound just right and it really showed.

            Marc caught me patting my chair. “It’s yours to keep you know? Tom didn’t tell you?”

“No, he didn’t” I said “thank you for letting me know, it’s very nice of you and it has been a real privilege for Lizzie and I to be allowed on your set this week.

“It’s been no problem at all” replied Marc “in fact it’s been a pleasure to meet you and I hope you and Tom will be very happy together”

“Thank you” I responded. Just then Tom wandered over after wishing some of his colleagues a good weekend. “All ready to go Darling?” he asked

“Yes Love, I was just thanking Marc for his generosity and kindness this week”

“It has been rather special” he mused “definitely one to remember”

I turned once again to Marc “well thanks again Marc, good luck with the rest of the shoot, I’ll try and keep this one under control but it will be long distance”

Marc chucked as Tom went slightly pink around the ears “I’m sure you’ll do just fine Jackie. Now where do you want the chair sent? Tom said he’d leave it to you to decide whether it was London or Wiltshire”

I was gobsmacked and sure I hadn’t heard Marc correctly. I loved the fact that I’d had my own personalised director’s chair and knew Marc had said it was mine but I didn’t for one moment think about how I was going to get it home. It only took seconds to decide though.

“Wilshire please” I said decisively, the thought of sitting in my back garden in that comfortable chair looking out over the fields behind my house was too good to refuse. Tom had access to a communal garden in London but it wasn’t the same, so it had to be the cottage.

“Excellent” said Marc happily I’ll get the details from Tom and will make the arrangements. I’m sure Tom will tell you everything you need to know. Anyway, goodbye for now Jackie, I’m sure I’ll see you at one of the Premiers” and he leant in to kiss me on both cheeks.

“Bye Bye Marc” I said “You’re bound to see me again at some point” I added cheerily completely glossing over the thought that going to a film Premier made my blood run cold. That was something I was going to have to work on. Tom took my hand as we walked away, he must have noticed the tension that had engulfed my body but thankfully said nothing until we were well out of earshot.

“You will come to the premier, won’t you Darling? I can tell you’re worried about it already but it will be fine, I promise”

I nodded slowly. I knew I was over reacting, it was a year in the future, and we would be married then, coming up for our first anniversary in actuality. I would go, however much I wasn’t sure because I owed it to Tom to be the supportive wife he deserved. I’d already vowed to myself that I wouldn’t hide in the shadows but having a definite goal and date to work to had focused my mind somewhat. I found my voice as we got back to wardrobe “Yes Tom, of course I’ll be there, even if we have to persuade Emma to have Lizzie for us! I wouldn’t miss it for the world”

Unsurprisingly I was pulled into a massive hug, which I tried to break as quickly so as not to damage Tom’s costume too much but he wouldn’t let go. “Thank you so much Darling” he said in my ear “I know how much it took for you to say that and I promise again that it will all be fine”

For that moment I actually believed him. I knew he would do everything in his power to make it as enjoyable for me as possible but I was also aware that he would have photo and interview obligations to discharge and I wasn’t sure if I would be a part of that. If I wasn’t, I may be out on a limb somewhere, waiting for him to finish with the press and that would definitely be the worst time for me. I pulled myself away from future problems and brought myself back to the here and now. We were hand in hand again, just getting to the wardrobe department for Tm to drop his costume off. I realised with a start that I would have to say farewell to Wendy who had been nothing but friendly in the week I’d known her. I was going to miss her, mainly for her incredible ability to make Tom feel like a little boy from all the scolding’s she’s given him over the care of his costumes. In fact, even this time she took one look at him in a very accusatory manner “You’ve been hugging again Hiddleston!” it wasn’t even a question. Tom, as seemed to be usual for him in this situation, looked at the floor, the wall, at a point just beyond Wendy: anywhere but at her face as he admitted that he’d hugged me tightly just a few moments ago. Wendy shot me a surreptitious wink as she said huffily “Well at least I’ve got the weekend to make your clothes look good again!”

            I supressed a giggle as Tom apologised profusely for causing her more work which to his surprise she brushed off with a smile. “It’s OK Tom, really. I know you’re a serial hugger, you just can’t help it, and I get that. Goodness man, you of all people should realise when you’re being teased”

Tom blinked a couple of times in shock and I erupted into laughter as the penny dropped for my beloved fiancé that someone had bested him. He ended up laughing with Wendy and I as the absurdity of him not trying to hug anyone sank in. We all knew that would be a pointless exercise, while he had strength in his arms Tom would never stop hugging!

            When he’d finally stopped laughing he slipped behind the changing curtain to swap his costume for his regular clothes. I took the time to thank Wendy for her patience with him and her friendship for the week I’d been on set, she’d been welcoming every morning and wished us a good evening at the end of every day’s filming. Never once showing if she was upset that there was an extra body in her space that did nothing but seem to get in the way. I could tell she was really good at her job; she kept a tidy work area and things were always ready for when they were needed. We were saying our goodbyes as Tom came back out from behind his curtain. I wasn’t surprised to see his costume neatly on hangers which he handed to Wendy with aplomb, no doubt trying to get back in her good books. I would be very interested to see how that went for him!

            I gave Wendy a warm hug goodbye and then it was time to go and find Harri so I could say goodbye to her too. She was in the make-up trailer tidying up her equipment from the day. She stopped as soon as soon as we stepped in and hugged us both at once.

“I’m gonna miss you Jackie” she said as we broke the hug.

“I’m going to miss you too Harri” I responded “and all the gossip you got me from the set! I’ll only get it past it’s tell by date now and have no one to share it with”

“I’ll keep in touch” she promised “and make sure this one behaves” and she jerked her thumb in Tom’s direction. He figured out he was being teased a lot quicker this time and responded with a sort of half glare that didn’t do anything because his eyes were dancing with mischief and we all knew it.

“If you’re ever in England and I’m around I’d love to meet up again and maybe take you sight-seeing” I said hesitantly, not knowing if that would be a step too far, even though I could see Tom nodding his head in agreement at the edge of my vision.

“I’d like that very much” she said enthusiastically “I might even have to make sure it happens now” We smiled happily at each other, sad to be saying goodbye but happy knowing we’d each found a new friend.

Tom checked his watch and cleared his throat softly “Jackie, darling, I’m sorry but it’s time to go. Vince will be waiting for us now and we need to grab our stuff from my trailer”

I turned back to Harri and shrugged “Guess I’ve got to go then, take care and hope to hear from you soon. I expect you to tell me all the stuff that Tom won’t!”

“I will, don’t worry” Harri replied with a big grin “Take care you, and Lizzie too, we may see each other again”

Hand in hand Tom and I made our way to his trailer to gather out belongings and found Vince who was indeed ready to drive us back to the ranch. Rodney, Claudia, Lizzie and Luke had just left so we were not too far ahead of us.


	91. Chapter 90

            On the way back to the ranch I could tell Tom had something on his mind and waited patiently for him to speak. It didn’t take him long to look at me and tentatively ask his question.

“Darling, do you think we could squeeze a couple more into the wedding?”

I knew exactly who he was on about, mainly because I’d been thinking along those lines too. “I don’t see why not” I said “final numbers don’t have to be in until the end of January and there’s always the extra bedroom at the cottage. I’m sure we can do it with some rearrangements, I’m assuming you want to invite Rodney and Claudia?” He nodded happily, relieved that I didn’t mind but I had no reason to. They’d taken Tom into their home and treated him like family from day one, Rodney especially going as far as to alert us that Tom wasn’t doing so well. They had also extended their generosity to Lizzie, Luke, and myself, who’d descended on them at relatively short notice in a house that wasn’t theirs. Claudia had entertained Lizzie and Luke whilst I was on set and they were not and it seemed only fair that they should be invited to share our special day.

“I’m glad you said that Darling, bought a couple of spare invites just in case” Tom replied with a cheeky wink “We’ll sort one out when we get back to the bunk house”

            It was only a short time before we pulled up outside the main house, and I said a fond farewell to Vince; he’d been good company to and from the set each day and had happily given up his evening the night Tom took me out for a meal which I appreciated very much. Tom and I made our way down the track to the bunk house, once inside we both freshened up and got changed into something smarter than jeans. Tom grabbed his guitar which had of course made it to his temporary home as soon as he’d been allowed it the previous Monday and we went back to the main house.

            I headed straight to the kitchen to prepare the remaining ingredients for that evening’s meal. I checked the seasoning of the soup first, pleased to find that it needed no adjusting and put it through the blender in batches to make it nice and smooth. Just as I was about to turn my attention to the main course, a traditional cottage pie, Tom appeared in the doorway brandishing a familiar cream envelope. “Found one!” he declared happily and went on a search for a pen. Mission accomplished he turned to me again and said simply “Now, or later?”

“Later” I said firmly “if we do it now we may get drawn into a wedding conversation we can’t get out of and then we won’t have enough time to cook”

“I hadn’t thought of it like that” Tom said contritely.

“It’s fine Love, that’s what you have me for!” I said cheekily, poking my tongue out for good measure. “Now can you chop these onions for me please?

He set to his allotted task as I chopped the carrots I’d peeled the night before and a stick of celery to go in with the minced meat for the base of the pie. The ingredients were all fried together in a large saucepan and then beef stock, tomato puree and herbs added and the whole lot was simmered for 20 minutes. I’d changed my mind slightly and decided to add some normal potatoes into the mash that went on top of the mince as well as the sweet potato. As we’d prepared those particular vegetables the night before and stored them in water in the fridge it was just a case of making sure that all the pieces were roughly the same size and putting them on to boil. Whilst the meat and potatoes were cooking Tom and I made the sweets, which were incredibly simple. The meringues were crushed lightly and mixed into low fat raspberry yogurt , which was then layered with fresh raspberries in tall glass serving vessels we’d found in one of the cupboards, with a final sprinkling of plain meringue on top. One of the things I’d asked Claudia to get for me was double cream and this was to be the indulgence for those of us not on a food plan if we so desired, whisked into soft peaks it could be dolloped on top of the meringue as a bit of decadence. By the time we’d finished the sweets the meat and potatoes were cooked. Tom mashed the potatoes into a smooth-ish consistency and I put the cooked meat into an oven proof dish. The potatoes were mounded on top and then spread out to completely cover the meat, and the dish was popped in a hot oven to brown the crust of the topping. A pan of carrots, peas and sweetcorn was put on to simmer whilst we ate our starter and suddenly we were ready. Lizzie and Luke had laid the table for us as there was nothing they could do to help us cook and so we gathered around the table and prepared to eat.

            The soup went down really well, even though cold soup was still something I wasn’t sure about. It made more sense in the warm climate than hot soup of course and judging by the reactions around the table it was something the English contingent wouldn’t mind if I made it again. Lizzie cleared the empty bowls whilst Tom and I brought the main course to the table. Claudia and Rodney had never seen meat and potatoes served quite like that before and I left it to Tom to explain the intricacies of the dish, and also that different meat used means a different name for essentially the same thing. Cottage pie uses beef as the meat and Shepherd’s pie uses lamb. I was really pleased at how that dish turned out; the sauce was the perfect creamy consistency, thanks to the porridge oats I used to thicken it and was full of flavour. Tom took his first mouthful and hummed in appreciation, as soon as his mouth was empty he turned to me and said with a cheeky look on his face

“You do promise to make this for me at least once a month, don’t you Darling? It’s even better than the one Lizzie and I made in September.

When Lizzie nodded her agreement and Luke, Rodney and Claudia joined in with their compliments I felt my cheeks reddening and ducked my head slightly trying to hide them. Tom, of course, noticed and said softly

“There’s no need to be embarrassed Darling, you’re a great cook and I look forward to sampling more of your culinary achievements at every opportunity”

Unsurprisingly that didn’t help me much, in fact if anything I felt my cheeks get even hotter. Noticing his words had had the opposite effect than he intended Tom thankfully dropped the subject and turned his attention back to his plate, but only after murmuring so that only I could hear “I had forgotten how prettily you blush however!” which, of course just made it worse.

            When it was time to get the sweet I went but myself to try and gain some composure back, even if it was only to cool my cheeks with cold water soaked kitchen towel. When I’d done that the best I could I loaded the prepared desserts on a tray, with the bowl of whipped double cream and carried it through to the table. As soon as Tom saw me coming in he gallantly stood up to help, taking the laden tray from me and depositing it carefully on the table. We passed around the dishes of meringue, yogurt, and raspberries and when everybody had been served sent the cream around too. I once again left Tom to explain the history of the dish; after all he’d been to the school it was named for! When he mentioned that yogurt had been used in place of cream to make this a lower fat sweet than normal both Rodney and Claudia took a large dollop of cream to go on top of their serving and I only felt a little bit guilty as I followed suit. Even before I’d met Tom it was one of my favourite sweets even though it is very sinful, but to find out the reduced fat version was just as nice was an added bonus. It seemed to go down well with our America hosts and pretty soon everyone had finished eating. Lizzie and Luke volunteered to clean the table and wash up, leaving Rodney, Claudia, Tom and I free to savour a coffee in the living room. We spoke about the food and how lovely it was, causing my cheeks to get warm again. Claudia noticed first this time and kindly changed the subject.


	92. Chapter 91

            Soon the subject of our forthcoming nuptials came up and Tom took that as his cue to hand over the invitation he’d been keeping safe for the last couple of hours. When he opened it Rodney was speechless for the first time since I’d met him. He showed the creamy cardstock with its emerald green decoration and jet black writing to Claudia and finally found his voice.

“Sir Lonesome-a-lot, I don’t know what to say. I mean you hardly know us, and Jackie knows us even less. I know we’re free then but so much would need to be worked out.”

Tom interrupted gently “Rodney, and you Claudia, you invited me into your home without a moment’s thought and helped me through something really tough. You treated me like family from the off and we would love to see you at our wedding. All you would need to do would be to book flights, accommodation is sorted and we can arrange transport from the airport to the venue”

I chipped in then “I may not have known you very long at all but I can see you are lovely generous people, you’ve welcomed us all, Lizzie and Luke included into your lives and home. Claudia we wouldn’t have eaten tonight if it wasn’t for you getting the shopping for me! I’m with Tom on this; we’d love to have you there”

Claudia and Rodney looked at each other for a moment “You’re sure now?” Claudia said tentatively.

“We’re sure!” Tom and I chorused and then giggled as we realised we’d spoken at the same time. It was something we did fairly regularly and I hoped it was a sign of us truly being meant for each other, as we were on the same wavelength more often than not. “Tom’s right though” I continued “we have a large stately home hotel booked for the entire week, with various people flying in at various points. To be honest, as yet we don’t even know the full timetable of arrivals but there will be plenty of room, rooms in fact, and we would sincerely love to have you with us”

“Well when you put it like that, how can we refuse?” responded Rodney “OK Sir Lonesome-a-lot and Lady Jackie, we’ll be there” Tom chuckled at the look on my face as my new ‘title’ sank in and then he continued “That’s great Rodney, email the address on the invite when you have dates and times of arrivals and we’ll make sure someone will be there to pick you up”

I had a sudden mental picture of ‘A’ list Hollywood celebrities arriving in London expecting to be met with smart cars and chauffeurs and us, having realised that the bulk of them were landing at roughly the same time, turning up with a mini coach and a trailer for all their luggage. The more I thought about it the funnier it seemed until my shoulders were shaking with the effort not to burst out laughing inappropriately. I’d gone very red in the face before anyone really noticed and Tom was immediately concerned when he realised that breathing was becoming an issue the more I tried to stifle my laughter. I realised too and gave up, giving in to the inevitable laughter. It was an aspect of my personality that didn’t surface very often, thank goodness, but sometimes I found the most mundane things infinitely amusing for no apparent reason, resulting in fits of laughter that I couldn’t control. I had literally cried with laughter more times than I could remember when I was younger but it had tapered off quite a lot in the last six years; and now I couldn’t remember the last time laughter had left me so incapacitated. I just couldn’t stop laughing and giggling; even the look of consternation on Tom’s face was amusing and I knew he was getting anxious but I couldn’t help it.

            Poor Tom actually ended up grasping hold of my shoulders and giving me a little shake to try and get my attention focussed solely on him and, to his obvious relief, it seemed to work; well I managed to stop the never ending giggles but I still had trouble drawing a full breath. Once Tom had realised I’d stopped laughing he was able to try and get me to breathe properly which he managed by getting me to breathe slowly with him. I found it really difficult at first but finally achieved a sense of normalcy. I was surprised when I was able to look around to see that Tom and I were the only ones in the room, Rodney and Claudia must have left to give us some privacy. Luckily it only took a few minutes for me to recover, and I saw Tom visibly relax as he saw that I was back to normal. “Care to explain what that was all about?” he said hesitantly, not sure if I would set off again.

I took a steadying breath “Lizzie calls them my ‘giggle fits’ “ I explained smiling as Tom raised an incredulous eyebrow “It’s just that sometimes I find the most silly things extremely funny and I can’t stop laughing about them”

“I see” said Tom; though I was sure he really didn’t “so what set you off on this particular occasion?”

Tentatively I told him of my mental picture of his showbiz friends expecting limos and town cars and ending up in a mini coach with attached trailer; with Robert Downey Jr. leading the party in the coach. Tom looked at me somewhat sceptically “And that one thought caused ‘all’ those giggles?” he said, clearly having trouble getting his head around that fact.

“Yes” I said simply “I told you , it doesn’t have to be absurd for me to find it hilarious” Lizzie poked her head around the door at that point and Tom beckoned her in “is this all true?” he asked her, straight to the point. “All what true?” she asked, her smile grew wider and wider as Tom tried to explain what had just happened and then she backed me to the hilt “Yes” she said “though I haven’t seen Mum quite like that since Nanny and Grampy died. It’s a good thing Tom; it means Mum is really happy! And you’ve done that for her, thank you so much, I was beginning to think I’d never see her truly happy again”

Those words had an unexpected effect on Tom, Lizzie and I were pulled into a gargantuan hug and all I could hear was Tom apologising. What he had to apologise for I wasn’t sure but he didn’t let us go for a short while. “I’m sorry” he repeated once we were separate again “I just hate the thought of you being sad and having no one to comfort you.”

“It’s fine” I assured him “I have you and Lizzie now, Lizzie always did her best but there’s only so much she can do and I didn’t want to always be upsetting her. Life is so much better now and will continue to be so, I feel it”

“So I can look forward to more ‘giggle fits?” Tom clarified.

I shrugged “I honestly don’t know that one caught me completely by surprise. You did exactly the right thing though and they were never that common anyway.”

Tom finally looked relieved “Good, because I won’t always be here to sort you out Darling”

“I know Love. And its fine, it really is. I’ve been following your career since Wallander, remember? I know how busy you’ve been in the past and I’m sure you will continue to be so. I knew what I was getting into when I agreed to marry you, you know?”

“That’s right” he said thoughtfully “you said in the Elle interview that’s when you first noticed me, all those years ago” he mused and in a swift change of mood he added cheekily “and you’ve been keeping an eye on me ever since?”

“Well” I hedged “ I can’t claim to have seen everything you’ve done, I wasn’t a Cranford fan anyway so I missed you in Return to Cranford, but I definitely remember you having curls!”

He laughed “God, yes! I couldn’t keep that tamed at all!” We were all smiling then. Lizzie hadn’t noticed Tom until Loki and I hadn’t managed to get her interested in The Hollow Crown, much to my chagrin, but she’d seen pictures of the younger, curly haired Tom when I’d been browsing the internet.

“Can I let everyone know you’re OK Mum?” Lizzie said softly.

“Oh goodness, yes please” I said quickly “tell them I’m fine and it’s nothing to worry about.”

Luke was the first to speak when he came back into the room “Is that something I need to know about?” he said, obviously in full on publicist mode.

Tom replied, quicker than I could formulate a response “No Luke, it’s nothing medical or psychological in any way. Jackie just suffers from occasional fits of the giggles and this one was particularly intense” he gave me a comforting squeeze “She’s fine now, with no ill effects, so you can stop worrying”

“OK” said Luke, “Just making sure”

“Thank you Luke” I said finally “but it’s nothing that can be controlled. It just happens rarely and has to be endured, and anyway aren’t you here as a friend, not an employee?”

Luke shrugged “What can I say? looking after him” and he jerked his thumb at Tom “is a full time job!”

I smiled “I think I’m beginning to see that!”

Tom poked me playfully in the ribs “Hey!” he exclaimed “I’ve not turned invisible you know?”

“Sorry Love” I said, turning fully towards him “I’ll try not to let it happen again”


	93. Chapter 92

            With that bit of drama over conversation gradually returned to normal: well nearly normal. Lizzie Luke and I were flying home the next afternoon and so plans were being finalised. It was quite simple really. There was no filming scheduled for the morning, so we could have a late start, if you didn’t include the inevitable last minute packing and searching for items that had somehow gotten lost. The six of us would go to the airport in two cars and Rodney, Claudia, and Tom would see us safely through to security. Tom and Luke had already arranged for Jeff to pick us up at Heathrow so it was all settled quite easily.

            Once details had been finalised Rodney seemed intent on shooing Tom and I out of the door. When neither of us took his subtle hints he huffed and said “You kids need to move along, Sir Lonesome-a-lot it’s your last night with your Lady for a while, you don’t want to be wasting it”

Tom and I both blushed bright red at his words, we couldn’t believe what Rodney had said, and in front of Lizzie too! I was really mortified and I know Lizzie felt the same. I could see a really painful conversation in my future that I didn’t particularly want to have, mainly because I didn’t know what to say. Before Rodney could open his mouth again Tom and I bade everyone a quick goodnight and beat a hasty retreat. At least outside, the fresh October air cooled our faces somewhat. Even Tom seemed shocked into silence by what had just happened.

            It was still relatively early and neither of us felt ready for sleep, or anything else bed related for that matter so we ambled along the stream again to the little bridge. It was light enough for a couple of races so we played Pooh Sticks for a short while neither of us wanting to address the elephant in the room that was my departure the next afternoon. Tom was the one to broach the subject, gently of course

“Are you already for tomorrow?” he asked softly

“Yes” I replied “I’m nearly all packed, just the basics to do now”

“Good” he said, still softly “shall we head back. I could murder a cup of tea made by one who knows what they’re doing”

I rolled my eyes at him “Really Tom, was that your attempt at subtle?”

He giggled “Yes, did it work?”

“Not really” I replied “needs a lot more work in my opinion” his face fell comically at my words “but, never mind” I continued “I’ll still make you a cup of tea when we get back” his face brightened and all of a sudden I wasn’t sure how much of what I was seeing was his actual emotions and how much was him goofing around trying to ease the inevitable tension my departure was creating. I supposed it would take a few more departures to see if a pattern emerged.

            We made our way back to the little bunk house we’d called home for nearly a week. Tom let us in and I went straight to the kitchen to put the kettle on. Reaching into the cupboard for the Earl Grey, I made a mental note to sort the next ‘hug in a box’ as soon as I got home as I had no idea how long things would take to cross the Atlantic. Tea made I took it to Tom on the sofa and we sat as close as we could without spilling tea on each other as we discussed minor things. Tom took our cups to the sink and washed them quickly. He came back and practically wrapped himself around me on the sofa, changing my position until he was satisfied which meant me being lengthways on the sofa, with my back against Tom’s front. As his arms and legs wrapped around mine he gave a contented sigh.

“This is nice, just the two of us” he said quietly “I am going to miss this, I will just have to count the days until I can do it again” it was a very tender sentiment and so like him to pick the perfect moment. It really was nice just cuddling on the sofa, knowing no one would interrupt our time together. Times like this would be few and far between for a while and even between New Year and our wedding I knew Tom had some commitments that he couldn’t shirk, we already knew that Tom would be nominated for some awards for his stint as Coriolanus which he’d finished just before he met me and I’d managed to see at the cinema when it was first broadcast. Awards season for the theatre was January and February but luckily didn’t clash with our wedding date. It struck me in that instant that one of those award shows would be my first proper red carpet event with Tom, and that thought made me stiffen in his hold.

“Darling, what’s wrong?” was his instant response to my change in posture. I did toy with the idea of not telling him but realised that it wouldn’t be fair, especially because we had promised each other that we would only ever be honest about our fears and insecurities. No, the discussion had to be now, it needed to be face to face and waiting until Tom came home would be far too late to sort anything out, so I took a deep steadying breath and started to explain “I was thinking ahead to next year, between you getting back from here and our wedding, and the awards shows that I know are coming” he nodded encouragingly so I continued “it just dawned on me that you may..” and I stopped suddenly feeling very self-conscious: what if Tom couldn’t take me, or even worse didn’t want me on his arm in public like that? How would I cope either way? Was I being too presumptuous expecting to go to these things with him?

Suddenly Tom was moving under me; changing his position so he could look me in the eye properly “Come on Darling” he cajoled “tell me what’s going on in that pretty head of yours”

Be honest I reminded myself as I started speaking “Well, first I thought that it would be very nerve wracking to be on my first proper red carpet with you, and then I thought what if you couldn’t, or didn’t want me to be there with you and I wasn’t sure how I would cope.” My voice had gotten softer the more I’d said until it was barely a whisper by the time I’d finished, my head had lowered as well because I didn’t think I could look Tom in the eye as I voiced my fears. I thought he’d be disappointed with me or even a little bit angry but his reaction completely surprised me.

            A single finger under my chin applied gentle pressure until I was looking him fully again, a look of compassion on his face. “You. Really. Are. A. Silly. Goose.” He said softly, each word punctuated by a boop on my nose. “We’ll address your concerns right now, so that there can be no mistakes later on. Firstly, if I can’t take you with me I’m not going! It’s that simple, unless, of course, you physically can’t be with me because of Lizzie and school. I can think of no reason why I wouldn’t want to take you and show you off so that particular point is null and void, and as for your nerves, well, how about we try and be in the crowd outside an awards ceremony we’re not attending so that you can see what goes on? It may help your nerves if you know what to expect. I also promise here and now you will ever be left on your own until you are comfortable with that notion. If I have to do bits by myself then Luke will look after you but hopefully that won’t be long anyways. Now was there anything else?”

I nodded slowly

“What is it?” Tom prompted, still being calm and collected, giving me the confidence to get all my worries out in the open.

“The dresses” I whispered

Tom looked at me askance “The dresses?” he repeated. I nodded again “What about them? Is it that you don’t have anything suitable?” I shook my head in the negative “Well, is it that you don’t think you can afford anything that expensive?” Again I shook my head ‘No’

“Well what is it then?” Tom asked, still being incredibly patient with me. I plucked up the courage to say the thing that hurt the most in my mind “I’m not pretty enough to wear something that gorgeous” I admitted very quietly

“Oh my darling girl, you are so wrong about that” Tom said lovingly “I’m the only one, other that you and Lizzie, whose opinion about you truly matters and I say that you could be wearing a potato sack and still look stunning to me. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Remember? You are gorgeous and intelligent, and strong, and wonderful and I wouldn’t have you any other way. You are a brilliant person, a fantastic mother, and a wonderful fiancée and you will be an awesome wife. I will be the happiest man in the world the day we get married and nothing will change that. I love you Darling, never forget that. You and only you are the one for me”

“But what if the Press, or your fans say something horrible about me?” I persisted; my mind didn’t seem to want me to be happy at that precise moment.

Tom looked at me sternly “We” he said, wagging his finger between us to emphasis his point “will ignore them. I don’t care what other people think. You being here this week has helped me tremendously in that respect, remember how I was so worried about playing Hank against all my critics that it put me off my game completely” I nodded. I wouldn’t be here with Tom at this moment if he hadn’t been struggling.

“Well one thing this has taught me is that I don’t give a flying fig about what anyone thinks anymore in my professional life, and my private life is even more important than that, so don’t you worry about what other people think and besides” he smirked “with Janet on your side what can possibly go wrong?” To further his point he dug out his phone and called up the pictures from outside The Ruben Hotel in London. “Look at you” he said reverently “You are beautiful darling and you’re the only one who has trouble seeing it; I will tell you every day if I have to but you are gorgeous” he kissed me then, slow, languid and sensual and I forgot all my worries and marvelled, not for the first time, that this impossible man with his generous heart had decided to spend the rest of his life with me.

            Reluctantly breaking the kiss Tom sighed and said “Enough talking for one night, up you get Darling and let me take you to bed.” I swung my legs and stood up carefully as Tom stood beside me. I expected him to put his arm around my shoulders or waist and walk me to the bedroom. I didn’t expect the sudden flurry of movement as I was lifted into his arms. Laughing openly at my shocked reaction he carried me into the bedroom and proceeded to show me how much he adored me.


	94. Chapter 93

            We didn’t get up incredibly early the next day, we talked for far longer that we’d realised on the sofa and neither of us stirred until 9am when our phones went off simultaneously. I wasn’t really surprised to see a text from Lizzie cheekily asking if we were going to make it to breakfast that morning but I was surprise to see an almost identically worded question to Tom from Rodney. I could imagine the four of them in the main house, giggling over the fact that we’d slept in, especially as it was so unlike Tom to do that. Washing and dressing quickly we made our way to the main house and were greeted by a round of applause from the other four, the cheeky blighters.

“Well, now that Sir Lonesome-a-lot and Lady Jackie have deigned to join us we can break our fast” said Rodney in the worst ‘posh’ English accent I’d heard in a very long time. It was so bad it was funny and soon we were all giggling. Once we’d stopped, the men decided that the women had done enough cooking for the week. Rodney and Tom gently steered Claudia and I from the kitchen to the dining table and refused to let us up again. Luke even gently persuaded Lizzie to sit with us whilst the men proceeded to create breakfast, and being men in a kitchen, a big mess too! I was very glad we’d also been excused clean up duty too.

Rodney had decided to do us a traditional American breakfast for our last day, piles of pancakes with maple syrup and crispy bacon or, for the slightly more health conscious, fresh fruit. Mindful of the fact that we’d be relying on airline food for the rest of the day and however tasty and well prepared it would be, it still would be smaller portions and infrequently; Lizzie, Luke and I loaded our plates. I couldn’t decide whether I wanted to be ‘good’ or not and in the end decided that a small stack of both toppings would suffice. Lizzie went straight for the bacon and syrup and pronounced it delicious after the first mouthful. Poor Tom, who was now firmly back on his diet plan, was only allowed one pancake but as much fruit as he wanted. He didn’t quite manage to keep his envious looks to himself and I felt very sorry for him as he started to eat his lonely pancake, though I don’t think I’d ever seen one eaten with such relish and reverence as he bestowed on that single round of flour eggs and milk!

            The pancakes were amazing, similar but also completely different to the ones Tom had made for Lizzie on her birthday and I did wonder what the ‘added ingredient’ could be. As the boys left the girls with their coffee whilst they attempted to clean the kitchen I was sure I heard Tom ask Rodney for the recipe so that he could enjoy them fully once he was home again, and I smiled to myself. I knew Tom could cook well for himself before I met him but it did seem that he was already preparing himself to be a family man, even if he didn’t realise it.

            With the kitchen finally cleared to Claudia’s specifications it was time to pack our final belongings and get ready for the airport. There was no real rush but also no sense in leaving things to the last minute. On the pretence of making sure Lizzie had packed everything I went to her room and she gave me the clover pendant I had bought Tom. Luke had managed to find a suitable chain if Tom wanted to wear it around his neck, costume permitting, and pendant and chain were sitting on top of a black suede pouch that was perfect for keeping it safe when not required. I put the items safely in the pouch and put the pouch safely in my pocket, I did a quick check to make sure that nothing was being left behind and then made my way back downstairs to where Tom was waiting.

            As we strolled down the path one last time I was trying to remember the sights and sounds of this wonderful place I’d called home for the last week, not knowing if I’d ever come to America again, or if I did (because honestly the chances of that were pretty high now I was with Tom) whether we’d ever come back to this part of the country. Once inside the little bunk house I decided it was time to give Tom his gift. Secreting the little pouch in my hand I pulled him onto the sofa with me and started speaking.

“My dear Tom, I’m going home today as you know and I was worried that you might miss your new Good Luck Charm so I bought you a pressie” I pressed the pouch into his upturned palm and closed his fingers around it.

“Oh Darling” he responded “you didn’t have to do get me anything, having you here was enough for me, you helped tremendously, you know that”

I nodded “I do know, and I realise what a difference you think I’ve made for you but I can’t be with you all the time so the pressie will have to do in my stead”

As I was speaking Tom had opened the tie on the pouch and tipped the contents into his hand. He gave a small gasp as he inspected his gift and when he raised his eyes to mine again they looked suspiciously damp. I knew then that the clover was a hit. He held it between his thumb and forefinger, testing the thickness and then held it up to the light so that he could see the tiny veins on the leaf. I hadn’t thought my little gift would render him speechless, but that is exactly what had happened. Eventually he managed to form words.

“Darling, this is perfect. Thank you so much. It’s so thoughtful; I can keep it on me and always have you with me.” With those words he kissed me and the actions and expressions he put into that one long kiss conveyed everything his words couldn’t. I realised he’d missed a special feature in his inspection though and showed him how the pendant could detach from the chain to completely, leaving just a very small hole for the chain to reattach to, meaning that if a costume didn’t allow for it to be worn around his neck there was always an option of a small discrete pocket to be incorporated into the remaining clothes so that it could still be on his person somewhere. Knowing Tom he’d always find a way to make it work.

Carefully putting the pendant and chain back together Tom handed them to me and said “Put it on for me?” Well I couldn’t refuse as he turned his back to me so that I didn’t have to struggle putting it on. I also couldn’t resist kissing the clasp on his neck, as he’d so often done to me, the meaning the same for the both of us; sealed with a kiss. I even saw him shiver a little as I kissed and knew he was still pleased beyond words with all my gestures.

Reluctantly he tucked the clover under his shirt and stood up, pulling me with him.

“Time to go” he said sadly

“I know” I replied equally despondent “but you’ll be home before you know it, and then”

“And then” he echoed “the fun will really begin!”

Tom insisted on taking charge of my suitcase and it was a sombre little party that met in the kitchen for the last time. It had been decided that Vince would drive Luke and Lizzie to the airport a few minutes ahead of us, the hope being that they could slip through the airport quietly without being spotted. We were all aware that if Luke was spotted questions would be asked, questions we didn’t want to answer, and Lizzie was still out of the public eye which was just what we wanted for now. Because of these precautions this was the only opportunity for Tom to say his farewells to both of them. Luke got a man-hug and heart felt thank you from Tom, I knew these men has said goodbye to each other countless times but I could tell from Luke’s reaction that this one was a bit special, possibly because of the circumstances that had brought us to America, or possibly because Luke was here, first and foremost, as Tom’s friend and not employee.

            Lizzie got a special hug too, and a kiss on the cheek which made her redden slightly, even after the time we’d been together she still saw ‘Tom the actor’ occasionally instead of ‘Tom the man’ and it was funny to watch her perception shift across her face as she fangirled (for want of a better term) briefly before settling into the hug as it was meant, not a touch between strangers but between a girl and a man who would become so much more to each other over the coming years.

            We all went out onto the front porch as Vince turned up, on time as usual, and waved as Luke and Lizzie headed off. Having double checked that everything had been packed from Lizzie’s room (Luke being well able to take care of himself!) the remaining luggage was put in the boot of Claudia’s car and we sat on the porch, waiting the required twenty minutes to give them time to be well ahead of us. There was one of those ubiquitous porch swings, big enough for two on one side of the door and Tom and I sat there, his long legs gently propelling us to and fro as we waited. Claudia and Rodney kept a respectful distance away, knowing what it was like to say goodbye for an extended period of time. Eventually it was time to go. Rodney cleared his throat before saying gently “Sir Lonesome-a-Lot? Lady Jackie? It’s time to go, Sorry”

“No need to be sorry Rodney” Tom said, just pipping me to the same sentiment. He stood and turned around to help me out of the swinging chair and we made our way to Claudia’s car. The journey to the airport was uneventful and fairly quiet; we all knew farewells like this were a pretty horrible but necessary evil in the entertainment business that three of the four people in the car were involved in.


	95. Chapter 94

            When we got to the airport Rodney took charge of the luggage, finding a trolley and placing my case on it with my hand luggage on top. Tom took my hand in his, after producing a baseball cap from his back pocket and proceeding to pull it down low, hoping it would be enough of a disguise for him to pass unnoticed through the lounges. We made our way to the pre-arranged rendezvous spot where Luke and Lizzie were waiting patiently, mostly out of sight and I heaved a sigh of relief that we’d made it undiscovered, until I realised that we hadn’t!

            As I stood chest to chest with Tom in a lovely embrace I spotted a gaggle of girls in my peripheral vision, they were nudging each other, whispering and giggling and I knew we’d been spotted. Tilting my head up slightly I murmured in Tom’s ear

“Don’t look now but I think our cover’s blown!”

“Where?” he said, just as quietly

“To my left, a group of four girls. Hang on they’re coming over”

Tom made a quick shooing motion to Luke, who thankfully saw it and realising immediately what was about to happen, took Lizzie away from where we were and headed towards the departure gate to start their boarding process. Tom broke our embrace and we stood side by side holding hands as the girls approached though I noticed he kept his head well down. As they came nearer it looked like they were cross referencing something as they kept glancing at a phone and then looking directly at us. The closer they got the more their voices carried until we could hear them perfectly.

“I told you it was her!” said one

“But what’s she doing here?” said another

I could tell by their accents that they weren’t local to Shreveport

“If Jackie’s here” said a third, obviously voicing what they were all thinking “do you think that Tom could possibly be here too?”

From the shaking of the tall body next to me I realise that Tom and I had had the same thought at the same time and whilst he obviously found it amusing I was flabbergasted. It was plain from their conversation that they had recognised me, not Tom, who hadn’t let go of my hand but had lowered his eyes and was standing slightly slouched to be less like himself trying, I suppose, to see how long it would take the girls to notice him, and for him to have a bit of fun at my expense.

The girls were really close now and the only one who hadn’t spoken was pushed to the front of the small group.

“Excuse me” she said tentatively. Plastering on a smile I gave the group my full attention, after getting a reassuring squeeze of my hand from Tom.

“Yes?” I said kindly “Can I help you?”

“We hope so” she replied “Are you Jackie Moore?”

“Yes I am” I admitted seeing no reason to lie. I swear they all gave out a little squeak.

“The Jackie who’s engaged to Tom Hiddleston?” she checked again, seeking clarification. Beside me Tom started to shake with silent laughter again, unable to believe that he could be unrecognised so close to me when they obviously knew who I was. It did strike me briefly that I was glad Tom wasn’t upset at not being recognised; some actors I’m sure would be very put out if they were being ignored as Tom basically was being at that moment. I’d always known, from even before I met him, that he wasn’t one for blowing his own trumpet too much and was actually an actor for the love of performing, not for the fame and money that he’d managed to attain by being so good at what he did. Luckily my wandering attention wasn’t noticed by anyone and I was quickly drawn back to the present by one of the girls timidly asking.

“Is he here? Tom I mean.”

Unwilling to keep up the pretence any longer, especially as I though the girls had been very brave essentially walking up to a complete stranger. I gave Tom’s hand a squeeze and he shed his disguise with a small flourish. The girls’ gasps were a mixture of shock and delight when they realised how close they’d been to him all the time they were talking to me. A lovely smile spread across his face as he greeted each girl individually and asked their name. The girl’s reactions were still amusing; two carried on as if nothing had happened, one was a little shocked at the turn of events and went completely quiet and one, poor thing, just stood there with her mouth hanging open seemingly unable to process the fact that her favourite movie star was standing so close to her. One of her friends took pity on her and gently pushed up on her chin until her mouth was closed again and this seemed to snap her out of her trance.

            The girl who’d spoken to me first then spoke again, addressing Tom and asking what he was doing in this part of America. Putting on an apologetic expression Tom quickly explained that was working on a project but was not allowed by his contract to talk about it to anyone not directly involved with the production, including me. This I realised would be something else I would have to get used to, the telling of white lies to friends, family and fans until being given the go ahead to speak about projects. I totally understood the need for secrecy about some things and hoped that Tom would be forgiven if the girls ever found out the truth. His explanation did seem to mollify the little group and soon they were asking questions of a more general nature, including inevitably any news on forthcoming nuptials, another question which Tom sidestepped politely but neatly. Photographs were then asked for by the girls and Tom obliged. They got snaps with him and snaps with him and me which he said was only fair because they were such loyal fans they’d recognised me.

            Unfortunately my boarding time was fast approaching so we had to make our apologies and hurry to the security area. Luke had realised what would happen, made sure that Rodney and Claudia had my possessions safe and had gotten Lizzie and him safely through security and into the departure lounge. I was confident that he would look after my darling daughter should anything happen to stop me getting the flight and that was part of the reason that he stayed with her. Grabbing my case and hand luggage I said quick last goodbyes, promising to see them all again as soon as I could, realising some would be sooner than others. I got through all the processes with no problem and had soon caught Luke and Lizzie up. I told Luke about the fans because he needed to know in his professional capacity as Tom’s publicist so that he wouldn’t be surprised if picture appeared as if from nowhere. He seemed really pleased with my actions and I found myself feeling proud of how I’d coped with the situation as we boarded the flight for the first leg of our journey home.

            There was no private plane this time, just a standard internal flight to the main hub airport and then the long flight back to England. The internal flight was quite crowded and we weren’t in First Class but it was comfortable enough, though I think Luke struggled a little bit, being slightly taller than average. I wondered how Tom coped with all his long limbs and then wondered if I would ever remember to ask him.

            The transfer at the hub was very smooth and it was nice to be able to luxuriate in First Class seats again though I realised how easy it would be to become spoilt by the experience. Everything was just as good on the way out as it was on the way in and we were soon all settled. It was another overnight flight so after a while Lizzie and I reclined our seats and went to sleep. As on our previous flight Luke woke us up just before breakfast and then, before we knew it we were on approach to Heathrow. We breezed through disembarkation, customs and immigration with no problem, even baggage collection wasn’t so much of an obstacle because of some ribbon Lizzie had found on one of her shopping trips. It depicted the Louisiana State Flag and we’d tied some to each piece of luggage making them very easy to identify. Jeff met us at the arrivals gate and he and Luke manhandled all our cases and baggage onto one trolley. It was quite early on a Sunday morning so the airport was mostly quiet and we got to the car with no incidents. Luke was going to be dropped off as his first and then Jeff would make the long drive to Wiltshire to see us safe to our door. When I apologised for what I saw as excess travelling he merely stated that he didn’t mind as all as Tom was a generous employer. I was pleased but not surprised to hear that as I guessed that Tom would be like that.

            Once in the car I text Tom, knowing that he wouldn’t mind if this particular message woke him up as he’d said he wanted to know I’d landed safely. The journey home was uneventful except for the return text from Tom acknowledging my earlier text and saying he’d speak to me later as usual.


	96. Chapter 95

            Time seemed to speed up once Lizzie and I returned from America, it was now November and our wedding was a mere four months away. Although we had an excellent Wedding Planner in Leanne and some things were already sorted, the one thing she couldn’t help with was my dress. I still had the designs sketched for me in Newbury and I knew that the other dresses were in the early stages, it was just Lizzie and I that still had to get something sorted. I still needed to find a dress maker that could turn those sketches into reality. I made it my priority the first week back I was back, through extensive internet searches and after visiting a couple of promising addresses I finally found what I was looking for. Hazel was a very competent needlewoman and was able to show me samples of her work; both in finished garments and pieces still in the process of being made, but almost as important for me was the fact that she had a great personality and I knew that we’d get along really well. She, of course, wanted to know all about ‘lucky man’ as she insisted on calling him and I was amused to discover that she’d never heard of Tom and didn’t recognise him when I showed her pictures although she could see why I was marrying him! I think it was that response that made up my mind for me. She didn’t actually care who Tom was; she just wanted to know that he loved me and would look after me. I shall never forget the words she said to me when I assured her that he did and he would.

She said “I’ll make you look so beautiful that he’ll forget his own name!” Satisfied I explained about the NDAs and Hazel was happy to sign one so I let Luke know and we made an appointment for Lizzie and I for after the NDA had been signed. I left her the sketches and went home, happy that another big tick could be put on my list of ‘things to do’.

            As I drove home my 'starphone' started chiming, I have a strict rule about not using my mobile whilst driving, it is dangerous and actually against the law in the UK so I ignored the phone. It could only be Tom or Luke and it being a text not a call meant that it couldn’t be that important so it could wait until I got home. It turned out to be a text from Tom which read ‘UNCONTROLLABLY EXCITED!! Check the joint email when you can!’ I did so and was surprised to find an email from Benedict with an invitation to his forthcoming wedding to Sophie, his girlfriend, no, his fiancée now, attached. I’d only met her a couple of times but she was very nice and I had the feeling we could become good friends given the chance to spend some time together, also what Tom and I knew but very few others did was that Sophie was pregnant. I did a quick calculation and knew that she wouldn’t be showing for the wedding which was planned for Valentine’s Day the next year, just two weeks before ours, and was being held on the Isle of Wight, just off the Hampshire coast. I could see why Tom was excited. Checking the calendar showed we would have a very hectic weekend, as the What’s on Stage awards were due to be held in London the day after the ceremony and we already knew Tom had been nominated for Best Actor for his portrayal of Coriolanus. On the plus side neither of us now needed to plan anything special for Valentine’s Day, I mean what could be more romantic than a wedding? I quickly emailed Tom back asking if he’d RSVP’d or wanted me to do it and saying how much I was looking forward to going. I also told him that the responses could wait until our conversation that evening as I didn’t want him to interrupt anything important.

            We had a Skype call that night and I could see Tom was still excited about Ben’s wedding; he’d obviously managed to have a quick word with Ben at some point because he was full of additional information. Ben had asked Tom to be an Usher, which Tom was only too happy to say yes to. Tom said Ben had explained that he didn’t think it was fair to ask Tom to be Best Man with his own wedding looming, but still wanted his good friend actively involved, seeing as Ben was already fulfilling that role for us, Tom could hardly say no. Tom had also looked at his calendar and apologised profusely to me that we wouldn’t have long on the island because of his Sunday commitment. I told him in no uncertain terms not to be so silly, being there for Ben on his special day was all that mattered. Lizzie was invited as well which was nice, so we decided that one day off school wouldn’t hurt as travelling incognito on the Friday was the only way we could ensure out attendance. Plans made I booked the ferry. There is no airport on the island so travelling by car ferry or private helicopter were the only options. We didn’t have the final times for the What’s on Stage awards show yet but after I’d done some research I realised that with the ferries running every hour on a Sunday morning and an approximately two hour drive on good roads from Portsmouth to London it was completely doable to travel on the Sunday after enjoying the wedding and reception. I emailed the booking confirmation to Tom and Luke so they could both see what it involved.

            Time marched on as it always does. I had regular appointments with Hazel who was doing wonders on the dress. After seeing the preliminary sketches from the trip to Newbury though she decided I needed something *more* and so started working on her own design. It became clear very quickly that to achieve a cohesive look the bodice of my dress would have to match the four ‘big’ bridesmaids as we’d taken to referring to the female part of the wedding party. We’d all have the same neckline and bodice shape and the girls would all have floor length skirts; but whilst theirs only flared slightly from the hips to give their skirts a bit of swirl and sway and give them room to move Hazel decided that my dress should move more. We’d already discussed my reluctance to wear white as it wasn’t my first wedding and as my daughter was one of my bridesmaids I could hardly claim to be pure either! Hazel hit on the perfect solution after she’d asked me my colour scheme; on hearing it was green and gold she found the most gorgeous gold silk on one of the racks. It wasn’t a strident colour though, but very pale with a beautiful shimmer to it that she decided would be perfect. I loved it too and tried to imagine what Tom and I would look like side by side on our special day. We would, I decided look better than I’d ever imagined and so I decided that the material was definitely the one for me. Within a couple of weeks the preliminary sketches had been transformed into something very special. The dress was still at the sketch stage but I could see how wonderful it would look. The long flowing sleeves remained big enough to notice and add drama to the dress but small enough that I wouldn’t spend the day cursing them or catching them on everything. The skirt was a masterpiece. According to Hazel it wouldn’t look any different to the other dresses until I started to move at which point the skilfully hidden folds of fabric would create an effect akin to me wearing golden liquid, the whole thing enhanced by a short-ish train. I was dubious but Hazel convinced me that the effect would work.

            It was always hard for me to keep the excitement out of my conversations with Tom the days I’d seen the progression of my dress, but I always managed. It was especially hard the one day Tom and I shared an early Skype call and he looked so dejected, frustrated and totally beaten that I wanted to jump on the next plane to him just so I could give him a hug. Instead I had to settle for good old words.

“What’s wrong?” I asked gently, ready to stop if needed but desperate to know.

There was a heartfelt sigh from Tom “Urgh. I had the worst day” he returned.

“I thought everything was going OK?” I ventured, conscious of the fact that Tom had already tried to hide how badly things were going before filming had even started and I was desperately hoping he wasn’t doing it again.

I got a small smile “Oh it is” he said “honestly. Just not today, and it was my fault.”

“How?” and with that one word the whole story of his day came tumbling out.

“I was running late, so rushed getting dressed and forgot my good luck charm. It all went downhill from there really. I didn’t have time to have anything to eat before shooting, so I’ve was incredibly hungry and I just couldn’t get a particular line of a song right today, no matter how hard I tried. In fact we spent practically the whole day on it”

“Oh Love. I’m so sorry to hear that” I said putting as much sympathy into my voice as possible. I knew Tom was a perfectionist when it came to his work; he was always fully prepared and eager to try different nuances suggested by the director but for him to be unable to deliver a line must have been terrible for him. “Was Marc cross?”

Another big sigh from Tom “No, and that just made it worse! He sent me away for a couple of breaks and I could get it right when the cameras weren’t rolling but as soon as it became a proper take it just wouldn’t work. Marc was trying to stay positive but I could tell he was frustrated with me because as soon as I finally got it right, he called the day’s filming over and sent us all home”

“That’s why we’re talking early” I said without thinking

“I’m sorry” said Tom contritely “were you in the middle of something? I could call back later.”

“Tom!” I said, letting some exasperation creep into my voice “This is exactly one of those situations where I drop everything for you because you need me. Remember that discussion? The one where I told you to ring me, no matter what the time?”

“I remember” he said sheepishly “Thank you Darling for being so understanding”

“That’s not a problem Love, now that you’ve spoken to me about it you can draw a line under it, put it behind you and start afresh tomorrow” I said imbuing confidence into my tone that I really did feel.

A smile spread across those luscious thin lips and this one made it all the way to his eyes which I was very pleased to see. The conversation then changed to my day and I was very excited to tell Tom that I’d been commissioned by a lady in the village to design and cross-stitch a sampler for her granddaughter who was getting married in early summer. Tom was all congratulations at the news and even wondered out loud if it may turn into a little money spinner for me. Because of his bad day I stayed non-committal on that particular part of the conversation but I knew that pieces like that took so long to stitch that you couldn’t charge a decent hourly wage and there was no way to make a living from it. I was chuffed to bits to be asked to do it and I did share that with him, he needed the positivity tonight, not the negatives. The conversation came to a natural close very soon after that. Tom still needed to do his exercise for the day and eat his still meagre rations before he could finally relax for what was left of his evening.


	97. Chapter 96

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my goodness over 6000 hits (at time of posting) Thank you all so much from the bottom of my heart. No way when I started posting this did I think it would do this well. I remember getting really excited when I got to 1000 hits and now here I am at 6000. For those of you who have been with m from the start thank you for all the kudos and comments. For any new readers, hello and I hope you are enjoying this, though let's face it, if you've gotten to chapter 96 I must be doing something right :-)  
> Comments are always welcome and will be answered :-)

  Chapter 96       

 

    The next big news broke a week later; Avengers: Age of Ultron, the next big movie due from the Marvel stable, was rumoured to need extra work on it and although all of the filming had officially been done all of the lead actors were asked to keep two weeks free in the upcoming January for reshoots. To my surprise that night Tom was giddy with excitement once more. Apparently Joss Whedon wanted him there too. It said a lot for Tom’s portrayal of Loki that it was thought that a character that wasn’t originally meant to be in the film could only enhance it with an appearance. It wouldn’t be a big part; there’s only so much that can be achieved in two weeks after all but it was a huge compliment. I couldn’t work out if he was more excited by getting to play Loki again or at the prospect of meeting all his friends not long before the wedding. For my part I was just glad the reshoots were scheduled for January, not February as that would have cause major problems.

            It seemed the reshoot would take place at Pinewood Studios which was good for us as I was sure there would be lots of details that would still need to be ironed out for the wedding and having Tom in the same time zone at least would be a great help. We decided then and there that Tom would use the opportunity to try and get firm arrival times and dates for the international wedding guests so that we could have some idea of who to expect when.

            Other than that life continued on as normal, no wedding news had leaked, Lizzie was still neatly side stepping awkward questions at school and she seemed to be spending a lot of time with The Roses. I wasn’t sure what they were up to but I’d rarely known her so happy so I didn’t pry.

            Filming continued to go well, Tom made sure to have his good luck charm on him at every chance and whether it was a kind of placebo effect or not it seemed to work. I’d exchanged a couple of emails with Harri and she echoed the vibe that I was getting from Tom that filming should be finished on time and would be done just before Christmas. Tom was understandably morose Thanksgiving weekend but soon bounced back to his normal self as he realised he could start counting down the days until we were back together because it was now less than a month to go.

            I’d also invited Diana to stay with Lizzie and I for a weekend which she accepted and we had a lovely weekend. She broached the subject of what we were doing for Christmas wish I’m sure she was worried about. Apparently the Hiddleston’s all tended to go to Diana’s for Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Boxing Day but Diana was worried that it might impinge on any family traditions that Lizzie and I held dear. I admitted to her that it sounded wonderful, Lizzie and I hadn’t had a big family Christmas for few years, even when Mum and Dad were alive there were really only four of us and, of course, for the last two years there had only been two of us. The big Christmas lunch that used to be the highlight of our day had been pared down and shunted to an elaborate evening meal but we rarely had a traditional turkey and all the trimmings and mostly spent the day lounging around in new pyjamas and dressing gowns. The prospect of having a proper family Christmas again was too good to turn down so I accepted on Tom’s behalf as well, knowing I’d be speaking to him that evening anyway, after Diana had left and returned to Suffolk.

            Unbeknownst to me though Diana had already spoken to Tom about the plans, wanting to make sure that she wouldn’t be offending us by inviting us I suppose, so when we spoke via Skype that night it was a very apprehensive looking man on my camera. I had learnt quite quickly to read Tom’s facial expressions, the ones where he wasn’t acting, which tended to be more natural and unguarded. The expression today was definitely <I’ve got something to tell/ask Jackie and I’m not sure that she’s going to like what I’m have to say> I smiled to myself as I was fairly certain why he looked like he did, he obviously didn’t know that Diana had spoken to me about our plans for Christmas. It still surprised me that this man who projected confidence wherever he went, and indeed was a source of inspiration to many could be so hesitant about broaching things so mundane.

            The conversation started as normal with chats about our respective days. Tom had known that Diana was spending the weekend with us, of course, and I think he was sad to have missed her but Wiltshire to Suffolk is a long way and she’d left just after lunch in order to be home at a reasonable time. I told him we’d taken Diana sightseeing in Bath; we’d actually gone on a tour bus with a commentary as it was the best way to see all the ‘good bits’. We’d also wandered around the Roman Baths which although expensive was well worth a visit. Tom thanked me very much for looking after his Mum so well, which I scoffed at because it was impossible not to like her and therefore want to please her, and I thought it was important to get to know my soon to be Mother-in-Law better. Tom decided then to bite the proverbial bullet as it were and mention Christmas. I nearly strung him along for a while but in the end decided that it was totally unfair to do that to him when he was so far away and obviously worried about my reply.

“I’ve already accepted your Mum’s invitation Tom” I said gently “it sounds like it will be fun. Lizzie and I haven’t had a family Christmas in far too long.”

The look of relief that crossed his face was almost comical “You’re sure?” he asked

“Yes Tom, we’re sure, we’re really looking forward to it actually. We don’t have many family traditions around Christmas but there is one I’d be loath to give up”

“What’s that Darling?” Tom asked full of curiosity.

“Well” I said “On New Year’s Eve there’s a barn dance at the Village Hall. We used to go every year as a family and its one thing we still do. Its great fun, they have a really good live band with a caller so it doesn’t matter if you don’t know the dances”

Tom started to smile slowly “You know I’ve never been to anything like that” he said “It does sound like fun. So it’s settled then, Christmas in Suffolk with the Hiddlestons and New Year in Wiltshire, just for us?”

“Are you sure you don’t mind?” I said, seeking clarification

“Perfectly sure” he said emphatically “It sounds brilliant. I’m already looking forward to kissing you at midnight”

“Me too” I said enthusiastically “our first Christmas and New Year together. It’s going to be such a change, but a really good one”

“I hope it doesn’t disappoint Darling” said Tom suddenly quiet as if he thought that it wouldn’t live up to expectations.

“Will you be there?” I said cheekily

“Well, yes” said Tom “Isn’t that the plan?”

“Well it won’t disappoint then, will it?” I said with as much sincerity as I could muster. We both smiled then, the sappy smile of a couple totally in love, even though we were separated by thousands of miles I’d felt the connection again, that little frisson I always got when Tom and I were on the same wavelength. We truly did love each other, as much as it still amazed me sometimes that Tom Hiddleston has fallen in love with me and chosen to spend the rest of his life with me, we really did have a connection. It was a feeling I’d never had before and it was wonderful, powerful, mind blowing and, yes, a little scary to feel this way about anybody else that wasn’t Lizzie. I had decided to embrace it, though it was had sometimes and I knew that as we were seen in public together more it could only get harder for both of us. Public scrutiny is hard enough but if the fans didn’t like it Tom’s career would be severely hit. I knew he wasn’t worried though, well didn’t care was more to the point. If Hank Williams had taught him anything it was to believe in what he thought was right in the face of stiff opposition. I also knew that our ‘outing’ would be handled as sensitively as possible for us by Luke whilst still presenting the right impression to the fans and media and had already had good results judging by the reactions of the fans in Shreveport Airport. I tried to follow the mantra: if Tom didn’t mind, I didn’t mind, but only when it came to his professional life. I couldn’t envision us going through the whole of our marriage without some cross words but as long as we didn’t sleep on an argument I was confident we would be fine.

            It was now the second week in December and flowers had been coming every other day from the beginning of the month. One look at the first card told me everything I needed to know, they were from Tom of course; cute little posies and arrangements that didn’t need vases, small enough to grace a windowsill or small flat surface and each card carried a countdown of the days until we physically saw each other again. It was a wonderful heartfelt gesture and so very Tom.

            The build up to the homecoming was frantic. Lizzie was still at school until lunchtime the day before Tom came back, though his flight was arriving late afternoon, early evening so timings weren’t too bad. I’d arranged with Emma to meet at Tom’s on the Friday evening and for the three of us to prepare the flat for the home coming. I knew he had a cleaning service but also wanted to make sure for myself that everything was perfect. Emma was all for it of course. We even managed, through meticulous planning to squeeze in a trip to Emma’s dressmaker so that I could see progress on her bridesmaid’s dress. With all that planned I could concentrate on Christmas preparations because I wanted all the presents brought before Tom came home. I knew he was picking up bits and pieces when he could in America because he was telling me with great excitement every time he did. The enthusiasm he was exhibiting made me realise that I could have a real handful to contend with over the Christmas period but that didn’t stop me looking forward to it.


	98. Chapter 97

Before I knew it ‘H’ day as we’d taken to calling it had arrived. Lizzie and I had travelled up as planned on the Friday afternoon, making sure we had everything we needed for a week at least. My poor little car was fit to burst with all the extra stuff we’d packed. I even found room for the latest two flower arrangements, thinking they’d brighten the flat beautifully and show Tom how much they meant to me.

            As arranged, Emma was waiting at Tom’s for us and we quickly dumped our luggage in the flat and rushed to the dressmakers. Emma’s dress was further along than ours were; the skirt portion was complete and hung in lovely folds to the floor. The bodice however was still a calico toile; the dressmaker explained that the bodice would be made as late as possible so that the dress would have the best possible fit. We looked at a few embellishments for the dresses, conscious of the fact that Lizzie’s dress would be identical to Emma’s. Although Emma was a bit shorter than Lizzie they made a good pair so Lizzie jumped at the opportunity to try on Emma’s skirt just to see how it would look. The colour looked really nice on both of them, a deep emerald green that went well with their natural skin colours, especially when an off cut of the fabric was draped over Lizzie’s shoulder to heighten the effect. After thanking the dressmaker for her time and patience and having spent a little too much on beading and enhancements we said goodbye to Emma and made our way back to Tom’s, thankful that he’d given me the keys all those months ago. We let ourselves in and proceeded to unpack and put away everything we thought we might need for the next few days. Most of it could stay in the cases as presents and Christmas outfits wouldn’t be needed before the big day. That done I made a quick meal with food brought from Wiltshire and then settled down with my laptop. I’d told Tom I was going out with friends for the evening and hoped he wouldn’t miss our last evening call too much. Just like him though to give me a call when he’d woken up that morning as filming was over and the wrap party all cleared away and he would soon be on his way home. He looked exhausted but I hoped that it was only from the very hectic last few days. When my mind deigned to return to more mundane matters instead of reminiscing about lovely Skype calls I wrote a shopping list for the next day. I’m not sure how Tom got his groceries before he met me and I started spending a lot of time in his flat but on the odd occasion we did run out of something vital like bread or milk it was no problem for me to pop to the local shop. I was still pretty invisible to Tom’s fans though the fact I was recognised when we were coming home from America meant that those particular circumstances wouldn’t last very much longer. I did think however that I would get away with a trip to the local supermarket early the next morning and so be able to cook Tom a nice easy meal for when he was finally back, get some bits and pieces for the days we were home and also get some treats for Emma, Lizzie and myself as a reward for spending the bulk of the next day getting ready for ‘H’ hour.

            With that thought uppermost in my mind I realised how late it had gotten. I grabbed my blankets and sleeping bag and got a pillow from our bedroom. I knew that I’d be warmer and more comfortable in the bed and that Tom had said I was welcome to use the flat as my own whilst he was gone, but I couldn’t quite bring myself to sleep in his bed without him, well not before we were married anyway. After that it would be our bed and so no problem. Tom’s corner sofa was as comfortable as it looked and I wondered if that was partially the reason for its purchase. It was long enough that even Tom could stretch out along its length and had a nice wide seat so that lying on it was really quite pleasant with minimal risk of falling off. Sleep came surprisingly quickly considering how excited I was for the next day.

            Emma arrived bright and early the following morning, ready to start preparations. As we sat down to a quick breakfast of cereals, toast and coffee, all our phones went off at once. We smiled at each other, this was a signal from Rodney that Tom’s flight had already taken off with no problems and so was expected on time. I got out my laptop to open the email properly to find a link to a video of Tom and Rodney singing ‘We wish you a Merry Christmas.’ It was hoped that posting it today would make fans think that Tom was still in America and dissuade them from staking out the airport.

“He’s on his way” Emma and Lizzie chorused, giggling when they realised they’d spoken in concert.

“He is indeed” I said “time to get a move on ladies!”

            When breakfast was over Lizzie sorted out the dirty dishes and the kitchen, Emma took the bathrooms and I stripped Tom’s bed of the covers that had been left on there when he went and put them in the washing machine, leaving the bed to air for as long as possible. I even lit a couple of seasonal scented candles to drive away the slight ‘tired’ smell that permeated the room. Whilst the sheets were washing I made sure the bedroom was spick and span an easy job since no one had used it since August. Tom’s cleaning service had done a great job keeping it clean but I wanted to add just a couple of personal touches to show I cared, I found a space for one of the flower arrangements I brought with me from Wiltshire and it really brightened the place up. I then chose the bedding that would be used that night but refrained from putting it on the bed, wanting to leave that till later. I even opened the window a little bit just to aid the flow of fresh air. Lizzie was airing out her bedroom after finishing the dishes and the kitchen and so then it was decided that Lizzie and I would concentrate on the living areas whilst Emma finished the bathrooms. I quickly checked on the washing machine and finding it had finished I took out the wet bedding, put it in the tumble dryer and set it running. Returning to the living room I tidied away my bedding from the previous night into a neat pile in Lizzie’s bedroom. I did quickly check the kitchen, cleaning not really being Lizzie’s forte but she had done a really good job. It would be easy for this room to look messy as it was so small though I remembered with fondness cooking for the Hemsworths in it. It was nearly lunch time so I decided sandwiches and fruit were the order of the day, with a nice cup of tea or coffee just to keep us going. I was intending to make a lamb and vegetable stew with dumplings for our evening meal, knowing it would cook long and slow whilst we were at the airport and then only need twenty minutes to finish off one we were all back in the flat, Emma had her own plans knowing she would see Tom soon anyway. Sandwiches made I called the girls for lunch at which point Emma revealed the existence of some cakes she had brought with her which were a lovely bit of naughtiness and a reward for all our hard work. It also meant that I would have cakes for the next day too as I could now save the one’s I’d bought that morning.

            I washed up and put away the dishes after lunch, it wasn’t worth putting the dishwasher on, though I did run it empty with cleaner just to rinse it through and get rid of any lingering odours from its lack of use. I often found it easier to wash small amounts up in the sink rather than using the dishwasher, a hangover of there only being two of us at home so unless I was really busy or had cooked something elaborate the dishwasher was hardly used. I prepared the casserole then, lovely chunks of lamb, lots of root vegetables, plenty of herbs and canned tomatoes and stock as the liquid. I found my mind wondering as I prepared the vegetables, thinking about the next couple of weeks. I knew what the plan was of course. We knew we were travelling late morning on Christmas Eve to Suffolk and Diana’s family gathering. I also knew we were staying until some point on the 27th and then traversing the country all the way to Wiltshire, with a one night stop in London, for our ‘private’ New Year celebrations. As we would only be home in London for a couple of days I wondered whether we would bother with Christmas decorations; although they were up in Wiltshire already. I had a feeling the next two days would be frantic but also knew Tom would be emotionally and physically tired so how much would actually get done was debatable. I suspected Tom would want to see James at some point too. There was so much to fit in it would be a miracle if we did it all.

            I realised I’d been ruminating longer than I’d been chopping and brought myself back to the present. I put all the ingredients into a large casserole dish and put it in the middle of the oven to cook, nice and long and low, this would make the lamb really tender and the vegetables would absorb all the lovely flavours too. I quickly made up a dumpling mix of flour, suet and water and put it in the fridge when finished. The dumplings would take twenty minutes when we got back and thus we would have a quick and easy tea which I hoped Tom would appreciate. The other recommendation for the casserole was that it would freeze if it didn’t all get eaten and then could provide a quick meal at a later date if necessary.

            Before I knew it was time for Emma to leave. I know she hoped to see us before Diana’s but she was as busy as we were so it was doubtful. Just before she left Luke turned up, he was going to accompany Lizzie and I to the airport. Jeff was downstairs in a town car with tinted windows for added privacy. I quickly sorted the now dry sheets, put them away, and made the bed for the night before having a quick freshen up and getting changed. I’d agonised over what to wear, I didn’t want to look too dressy and so conspicuous just in case we could manage the pick-up with minimal interruptions but, on the other hand, if we were papped and/or met Tom’s fans I wanted to look properly put together and not like I’d just thrown any old thing on. I’d settled on a pair of straight legged purple trousers with flowers and leaves embroidered in a slightly darker shade of the same colour, a pale lilac short sleeved jumper top with delicate beading around the neck and, of course, the Hiddleston Pendant. I wasn’t one for make-up normally but Lizzie and Luke surprisingly, insisted on at least eyeshadow and lipstick in case of photos. When everyone was finally satisfied we headed down to Jeff.


	99. Chapter 98

            It didn’t take long to get to the airport and we actually had the notification that Tom’s plane had landed whilst we were still on our way. I started to worry then until Luke gently reminded me that the plane still had to get to its assigned arrival gate, disembark its passengers and they had to negotiate immigration, baggage claim and customs, giving us plenty of time to be in arrivals before Tom. In the interests of Lizzie’s privacy, which we were all still committed to before the wedding, it was decided she would stay in the car with Jeff whilst Luke and I got Tom. Luke had explained that it was easier for him to do his job as Tom’s publicist if he was actually there for certain things in case anything untoward happened so he could respond with first-hand experience. I knew he would hang back and let Tom and I have our reunion in peace but I was also pleased he was there as I had to tell him I honestly had no idea how I’d react to seeing by beloved fiancé again. Luke really was worth his weight in gold when he told me to just do what came naturally and not to worry about anything.

            My excitement ramped up a notch when I got a text from Tom saying he was making his way to the baggage claim hall. Luckily we were already inside that airport perimeter and now I knew it wouldn’t be long at all before I was in his arms. Jeff dropped Luke and I outside the terminal and made his way to short term parking where they would stay until Luke called him to collect us. Luke and I positioned ourselves at the arrivals gate, we’d been correct about the number of people around. It wasn’t overly crowded but it wasn’t anywhere near empty either. I was surreptitiously glancing around for paps and even saw a couple I recognised from watching far too much daytime television when I was on maternity leave with Lizzie. I knew that Heathrow had its own Press Corps who generally found about celebrities on flights so I supposed there was a fair chance that we would get some shots taken, but whether they would be news worthy was another matter. The crowd around the arrivals gate started to build as people seemed to sense that passengers were imminent. Luke and I were standing just over half way up one side and my eyes were firmly on the doors Tom would walk through. I soon caught a glimpse of a familiar forehead and gasped quietly; Luke heard me anyway and gave me a gentle nudge on the arm. That was all the invitation I needed to start moving. I’m not sure if Tom has spotted me yet but I walked quickly parallel to the arrivals funnel until I was at the end of the barrier. There was no one to stop me as I kept walking and I unconsciously quickened my pace until I was nearly running against the flow of people but always towards Tom. Luckily for both of us people quickly realised what was happening and as if on command the crowd parted and suddenly Tom and I had an unimpeded view of each other. Tom had the good sense to put his guitar case on the floor and let go of his wheeled suitcase as I barrelled towards him. He held out his arms and I fell into them, tears of happiness streaming down my cheeks.

“Oh Darling” he soothed “it’s OK, I’m home and safe now”

“I know” I said through my tears “I missed you so much, even though we spoke most days”

Tom squeezed me tighter “I missed you too Darling” and then softly in my ear “Where’s Lizzie?”

“She’s in the car with Jeff” I said equally quietly “we all thought it was best”

“Brilliant Darling” Tom said, still softly, and then a little louder “Come on, let’s find Luke” by unspoken agreement Tom grabbed his case again and I picked up his guitar. He slung his free hand around my waist and mine automatically snaked around his and in step we walked to the end of the barriers where Luke was waiting with a smile on his face. “Well we know what welcome home Tom can expect from now on” he said through his smile and I let out a sigh of relief as the small part of me that had managed to stay rational after seeing Tom realised that Luke wasn’t upset with this particular display of affection.

            Tom released his hold on his case to clap Luke firmly on his back “Good to see you again Luke. Thank you so much for looking after Jackie and Lizzie for me”

“Never going to be a problem Tom” Luke replied happily “They’re a lot less trouble than you anyway! Come on, let’s get you two to the car” Luke had evidently text Jeff as Tom and I reunited as he then informed us that the car was outside.

            I thought we may have gotten away with a quiet return home but then a lone journalist and photographer came towards us. I even recognised them from the Heathrow programme I used to watch all those years ago, and Tom and Luke apparently did too because we all stopped walking. The journalist very politely requested an interview and some photos. Tom looked at me with that one eyebrow raised in query, silently asking my permission and I shrugged, subtly signalling my acquiescence. I was just glad that my tears of happiness had not ruined my make-up and that I still looked fairly good I hoped, though I was sure that Luke would have been quick to step in if I wasn’t. He was still quite protective of Lizzie and I which I enjoyed as I knew that it wasn’t just because he was Tom’s publicist. Our regular phone calls whilst Tom was stateside had shown me that he was a genuinely nice person, always asking after Lizzie and myself as if we were the most important people in the world. His help with the NDAs had been invaluable and I counted him as a good friend. How we were going to get him to stop working on the wedding day was a problem still to be solved as I specifically wanted him to be able to enjoy the day fully and not have to worry about anything.

            The journalist asked his questions and the photographer took a couple of shots; the whole thing didn’t last more than five minutes which was good because all I wanted to do at that precise moment was to have my family back together again. As we walked out of the terminal building Jeff emerged from the driver’s seat and took charge of Tom’s bags, placing them carefully in the boot as Luke got in the front passenger seat, leaving the back of the car for Lizzie, Tom and myself. I smiled widely as Tom opened and held the door for me in a familiar gesture that I missed much more than I thought I would. Lizzie was sitting behind Jeff so I sat behind Luke feeling grateful that the town car had more room in the back than a normal car because then Tom could get in between us as we knew he wanted to. He climbed in and sat down before being greeted effusively by Lizzie, who had obviously missed him more than she had let on. He returned her greeting just as warmly and then put an arm around each of our shoulders seemingly intending them to stay there all the way back to his apartment. I could see Tom starting to flag, his energy dipping as he no longer needed to keep moving and hoped that some food and a good night’s sleep would go some way to restoring him to his usual bubbly self. Conversation was light in the car, even Luke refraining from talking too much ‘shop’ perhaps aware of how tired Tom was.


	100. Chapter 99

            Jeff dropped us and the luggage right outside the apartment building and I quickly dug my keys out to save Tom the bother. Lizzie had appropriated the guitar and was holding it reverently, fully aware how important the instrument was to its owner. Once inside the building I snagged Tom’s large case and refused to give it back as he put up a token protest. We got in the lift and made the quick journey to Tom’s floor. I opened his front door and led the way into the apartment proper. The casserole smelt amazing and I turned around in time to see Tom and Lizzie sniff appreciatively at the tempting aroma.

“You cooked?” he said, sounding surprised

“Yes” I said “I put it in the oven to slow cook before we left to pick you up. I just need to sort the dumplings out now and it’ll be ready in about twenty five minutes”

Tom was obviously having problems processing that information because his next words were “We’re having a casserole with dumplings for supper, real dumplings with proper suet?”

“Yes” I said patiently “is that OK? I mean I can stop it cooking and freeze it if you’d prefer something else?

His response was immediate “Don’t you dare! I haven’t had a proper casserole in so long it’s untrue and that smells amazing”

“Right then, go and dump your case wherever and sit down, I’ll be as quick as I can!” Thankful that I’d prepared the dumpling mix before I left. I turned up the oven and concentrated on shaping the dough I’d made into little balls that I dropped onto the top of the casserole dish after checking the liquid level. When all the dumplings were on top of the meat and vegetables I placed a layer of tinfoil between the lid and base so that the steam from the liquid of the stew could work its magic.

            Normally all our meals would be eaten at the dining table but tonight was a special exception, it had been a long day for all of us, longer again for Tom and frankly we couldn’t be bothered. I found a nice set of pasta bowls in a cupboard that would do to serve up in and so we sat with our food on trays with glasses of water to wash it down. We all tucked in, the room quiet as we ate with enthusiasm. Halfway down the bowl, his initial hunger sated Tom turned to me as said simply “God I love you! I can’t remember the last time I came back to a proper home cooked meal after so long away. You definitely know the way to my heart!”

I feigned shock and outrage as I looked him straight in the eye “What happened to loving me for my intellect, beauty and wisdom all in one package?” I said as indignantly as I could manage. I could see Lizzie smothering her grin on the other side of the sofa “All of those wonderful qualities you said I possessed and in reality it boils down to the fact that you didn’t have to worry about food when you got home!?” Tom had blanched as I started my tirade and I realised a little too late that he was far too tired to take the teasing and I stopped immediately. As soon as I had finished speaking he was apologising, stumbling over his words in his haste to placate me.

“I’m so sorry Darling. I didn’t mean to imply that I only love you for your cooking. You know you mean more to me than that, don’t you? I apologise with all my heart if I offended you and I’ll make it up to you somehow, I promise” he turned the full effect of his formidable puppy dog eyes on me for good measure too. I couldn’t stand to see the poor dear worried like that so as soon as I could get a word in edgeways it was my turn to apologise to him.

“I’m really sorry too Love, I was only pulling your leg. I couldn’t resist after your comment about the casserole and I didn’t realise that you were so tired that you wouldn’t see I was teasing you. I’ll remember to mind my words from now on, especially after you’ve been travelling”

            Tom relaxed straight away, a small smile creeping over his face as it registered that he wasn’t in trouble with me “Well I must say you had me fooled, I really thought you were cross with me. I’m glad you’re not though”

“Me too, that would be a pretty poor welcome home, wouldn’t it? Now do you want any more of my excellent cooking? There’s plenty left but it will freeze if we need it to.”

Tom thought for at least a whole millisecond. “Can I have a little bit more please? But we will freeze the rest, it is really delicious”

            I took his bowl and served a smaller portion, fully aware that he didn’t need to overload his stomach after his recent forced diet. His second helping did go down slower as Tom took him to savour the casserole. When his bowl was empty again he sat back on his seat, a look of pure contentment on his face. Lizzie got up to clear the dirty dishes and promised a cup of tea. I could see Tom was seriously flagging again as soon as Lizzie was out of view, though he insisted he was fine. I kept my opinion to myself but did know that a big meal after a long days travelling was liable to make him sleepy, add in the change in time zone and it was practically guaranteed. It transpired I was right and not long after he had finished his cup of tea he turned to me apologetically and said.

“Darling, I know this is terribly rude but would you mind if I took a short nap? I only need twenty minutes or so to recharge my batteries and then we can have a proper catch up”

I looked at him, making sure that my expression was full of love and support “Of course that’s OK Love, do you want to us my lap as a pillow?”

“I hadn’t thought about that, yes that would be really nice. Thank you” He shifted position so he was lengthways on the sofa, lifting his legs and resting his head gently on my legs. I can’t explain why I did it but I started running my fingers through his hair. It was still a little darker than normal but free of the product that had been used to transform and tame his hair into Hank’s style. Tom seemed to like the sensation because he let out a very contented sigh after a couple of minutes and, as I watched his body totally relaxed. He was soon breathing deeply and evenly as sleep took him. I had no choice but to stay where I was but I didn’t really mind. I took it as a complement to our relationship that Tom was comfortable enough with us in what was essentially still his own home that he could fall asleep so easily.

            After about forty minutes I started to wonder what to do. Tom had neglected to say whether he wanted me wake him up or not and because I’d seen how tired he looked as he settled down for his nap I couldn’t bring myself to wake him so I sat dozing as he continued to sleep. He didn’t move one iota so I knew he really needed this sleep. At one point, when Tom had been dead to the world for about two hours, Lizzie emerged from her bedroom to get a drink of water and saw us still on the sofa.

“Hey Mum” she said softly, not wanting to wake my slumbering fiancé “Everything OK?”

“Oh yes” I replied “Tom’s fallen asleep though and I think we might be here for the duration. Can you get us a couple of blankets please? I’m getting a bit chilly”

“Sure Mum” was her immediate response and she went to retrieve my bedding from the night before. She draped two blankets over Tom making sure he was fully covered and then looked at me with a strange expression on her face.

“What?” I whispered

She shrugged “Just trying to work out how to get this on you” she replied and held up my sleeping bag “you can’t move so I have to work around you sitting down and Sleeping Beauty there!”

I just managed to supress my laughter at what she’d called Tom, however apt it was. I really didn’t want to wake him at this point. Finally we surmised that if she undid the zip of the sleeping bag most of the way I could sit with it up to my knees with the zip to the side Tom was sleeping on. The rest of the bag would be worn like a sideways cape, making sure that Tom wasn’t covered by the bag. The resulting gap down my right side was covered by yet another blanket and soon I was as cosy as I was going to get. Thanking Lizzie as she went on her aborted trip to the kitchen I settled down as best I could in the circumstances. It wouldn’t be brilliant but it was sleep as opposed to dozing.

            Tom woke with a start in the early hours of the morning, totally disorientated and confused as to why he was on the sofa instead of his bed. His shifting around woke me too and I gently explained that he’d fallen deeply asleep and resisted my attempts to wake him so I’d left him to sleep.

“Well” he said ruefully “that wasn’t what I had planned for the rest of the night at all. We’d better go to bed properly I suppose” he shucked off the blankets that had been covering him and swung his legs around to stand up. Rising gracefully to his feet he turned around to help me out of my coverings. When I was free to stand I tried to do so but it all went horribly wrong! I hadn’t realised that my leg had gone to sleep completely and so my ankle refused to stiffen and hold my weight.

            Before either of us could react I was measuring my length on the floor in a most undignified manner. Tom was quick to help me up but I was already trying to rise as he moved towards me. I’d instinctively put my hands out to try and stop my head hitting the floor but now my left wrist was really painful and I yelped audibly as Tom grabbed that hand to help me up. “Oh Darling, I’m sorry, here let me see that” he said quickly, taking a softer grip on my sore wrist. His warm hands gently manipulated my joints and asked me to wriggle my fingers if I could and we were both relieved when I could manage that simple action.

“Hmm. I don’t think it’s broken; we’ll put a cold compress on it for a while and strap it up after any swelling has gone down, just to give it a chance to heal. You should be fine for Christmas” Tom said, completely taking charge of the situation. Sitting me back down on the sofa he headed to the family bathroom and rummaged in a cupboard for a First Aid kit I hadn’t even know existed. Seeing the look on my face he murmured “it never hurts to be prepared you know?” Digging in the kit he came up with a small pouch of a gel like substance which he squeezed until there was a sharp ‘crack’ from inside. He immediately wrapped the pouch around my wrist and I gasped as I felt it chill my skin.

“Instant ice pack” he explained “don’t worry, it’s perfectly safe, much better than a bag of frozen peas. We’ll leave it on until it’s no longer cold then strap your wrist. OK?”

“Yes. Thank you” I said quietly feeling rather silly about what had happened

            Tom gave me a very assessing look “You need something to distract you” he said half to himself. He rose from his seat and went to the kitchen where I could hear him trying to be as quiet as he did whatever it was he was doing though I could hear it involved at least one saucepan. In a very short space of time he was heading to the bedroom, and then back to the kitchen. If he was trying to distract me he was doing a grand job, I had no idea what he was doing. I could soon hear sounds of stirring emanating from the kitchen, followed by a delicious aroma as Tom emerged with a steaming cup in each hand and a smile on his face. As he got closer I could smell hot chocolate and returned his smile with one of my own for his thoughtfulness. He placed the mugs on the coffee table which he moved to make it easier for me to grab my drink, it was only then that I saw the heart shaped marshmallows floating on top of the liquid. I’d never seen marshmallows like that before and I looked up at him in wonder as he shrugged

“I saw then in America before Ben’s invitation and thought I could do something with them for Valentine’s Day” he paused “we’re going to be a bit busy that weekend, so we might as well enjoy them now. However I do promise that I will make time for us exclusively at some point over the two days. Our first Valentine’s Day should not be ignored for any reason”

“No it shouldn’t” I agreed quietly. We had a lot of firsts coming up in the next few months; life was certainly not going to be dull!

            The hot chocolate was excellent and we drank it fairly quickly as it was better the warmer it was. When we’d finished Tom checked the ice pack and my wrist, he had me wriggle my fingers again and move the joint as much as possible which wasn’t much at all really. Tom frowned slightly as he said “Well I still don’t think it’s broken, you’re moving it too well for that but I do think the sprain is worse than I thought, good job it’s not your dominant hand” <Good job most of the presents are wrapped!> I thought to myself, especially because all of Tom’s were done. He took the pack off fully and, taking a bandage out of the First Aid kit, tenderly but firmly strapped my wrist. I wondered where he’d learnt to do the job so expertly and my question must have shown on my face because suddenly he was speaking again “You wouldn’t believe how many times I’ve had this done to me on set” he explained “you soon pick up the technique.” Well that at least explained his expertise, though I didn’t like the idea of him hurting himself too often and it must cause havoc with the filming schedule if the star is all banged up. Finishing the bandage with a bit of tape he quickly packed away the kit and we went to bed.


	101. Chapter 100

            My wrist was really painful in the morning but Tom was happy that it still seemed to be only a sprain and that my fingers wriggled to his satisfaction, poor Lizzie got a shock when she joined us for breakfast though. Tom was mostly back to his normal demeanour and was talking about us getting a tree for the apartment. I thought about protesting seeing as we wouldn’t be around to enjoy it all that much but something in his joyous expression stopped me. I was fully aware that this was our first Christmas together and I didn’t want to ruin what promised to be a lovely time. After reassuring myself that the decorations would be down by Twelfth Night I remained quiet, it already seemed that although Tom was supposed to be Wiltshire based until the summer when he was home, an awful lot of the first couple of months would see us apart once more as he fulfilled commitments that were set in stone, and it would be churlish of me to add more problems by telling him he couldn’t have a tree in his own home. Consequently, after the breakfast things were cleared away, Tom announced a family trip to buy a Christmas tree which necessitated a trip to the outskirts of London to a Christmas tree wood. I’d never been to one before but it seemed like old hat to Tom. I’d brought my car to London, I was getting better at driving in the city now, though the traffic still scared me slightly and we really needed a car that the three of us could get in for running around. Tom had hired a larger car to take us to Diana’s as we would have luggage to contend with too and my car really wasn’t big enough but for now it would do.

As per usual Tom drove and jumped out as soon as we’d parked to open the door for me. Such a simple gesture but one he never failed to perform given the chance, and it always made me feel special, I’d really missed it whilst he was away. With his arm around my waist and mine around his and Lizzie on his other side we made our way to the little hut that was acting as the sales point. The man in charge came out of the hut at our approach and smiled immediately when he saw who it was.

“Mr Hiddleston, how lovely to see you again. Hs it really been a year?”

Tom smiled “Yes Reg, it has, hard to believe isn’t it?”

They were both smiling broadly and I got the impression that this was a private joke between them and I wondered how long Tom had been coming here. He suddenly realised that he hadn’t introduced me and set about doing so quickly.

“I’d like you to meet my fiancée Reg, this is Jackie and her daughter Lizzie” he said as we shook hands.

“A pleasure to meet you my dear” Reg said and turning to Lizzie who was obviously in awe of all the trees of various ages around her said “come on little lady, let’s find you a tree then” Lizzie shot us a bemused look as she followed Reg into the wood of tiny trees as Tom explained to me that this was a family business that had been here since he was a small boy in London and he frequented it as often as he could, jobs permitting. I smiled to myself; it was so like Tom to think of others like that and to be loyal to good service even if it meant extra effort on his part. We followed Reg and Lizzie until we got to the trees that were ready for this year. I wasn’t sure what to look for as although we’d had real trees when I was younger, I’d only had fake trees since I’d gotten married to Sean. Tom however seemed to be fully capable of picking a good specimen as he looked at all the trees with a judicious eye. “What do you think Darling? How big shall we go?” he said trying to involve me in something I had no knowledge of.

I hesitated “Well, not too big, or too small I suppose, I don’t really know. Where are you thinking of putting it in the apartment?”

“Well it normally goes at the end of the sofa nearest the window, it’s not in the way there and there’s plenty of room around it so it doesn’t look squashed in” he replied.

“And do you have an elevated stand for it or just a little one that stands on the floor?” I asked

“Oh it will be floor standing” said Tom quickly “well that’s the stand I normally use anyway”

“Right” I said, feeling more confident now that I had a better idea of what we were looking for “so I think we need a tree that has a longish trunk beneath the bottom branches so that there is enough room for any presents people may receive and I also think it need to be just a bit taller than you Love so that it doesn’t look stupid when you’re next to it and we need to be able to get it into the apartment”

The sheepish look that flited across Tom’s face told me that he wished he’d thought of at least one of those attributes on at least one occasion before. “I knew I brought you along for a reason” he murmured into my ear proving to me I was right. I looked forward to getting a story out of him later. For now though we had a much better idea of what we were looking for. Lizzie and Tom saw the ideal tree at the same time; luckily it was the same tree they both picked! I could see it was just a bit taller than Tom but got him to stand next to it just for fun, with a huge smile on his face he did as I asked and it seemed the perfect height. There was a decent amount of trunk as well and it was neither too bushy nor straggly. It was certainly the right tree for us. Reg trotted off to get a saw as we contemplated out latest purchase. Tom’s eyes shone with excitement and I saw, not for the first time how boyish his personality became when he was doing something he really enjoyed with no one to censure his behaviour, when he could really be himself and enjoy the things the rest of us took for granted. Those moments were very special for me too, because they meant that he was truly relaxed, which he didn’t get the chance to be very often as he always felt he was under some form of scrutiny. There was no one around us at the moment though and his guard was completely down. “This is going to be great” he said happily “Our first Christmas tree, golly our first Christmas, I want it to be so special”

“It will be Love” I promised

            Reg reappeared with a saw and in no time at all the tree was felled. In a clearing close by there was a tree wrapping machine which carefully bound the branches so that the tree wouldn’t suffer on its journey to Tom’s apartment. This led me to realise that I had no idea how we were going to get the blessed thing home. I tugged on Tom’s sleeve to get his attention “Tom” I whispered “how are we going to get the tree home? It won’t fit in or on the car and I have no luggage straps”

Tom flashed me a fond smile “Don’t worry Darling, we are on Reg’s way home, he’ll drop it off later for us. It will give us time when we get home to find all the decorations and prepare the space.”

“Oh” I said, feeling a little silly and then confused again “Does Reg do this for all his customers?”

“Well. No” Tom admitted “but he’s done it for us forever”

I smiled “Well I for one am very happy we don’t have to wrestle the tree home. Thank you Reg” I said, turning to the man in question.

“No problem” said Reg “it’s always a pleasure to see Tom”

By this time the tree was securely wrapped and Reg pulled it along behind himself on a small trolley until we back to the little shed, grabbing a label from a pile he scrawled ‘TOM’ on it and tied it to the top of the tree.

“Right then Tom, you just need to pay now and I’ll see you later. OK?”

“Of course Reg” Tom stated as he got his wallet out of his pocket. Once the money had changed hands Tom turned to me with a beaming smile and said it was time to go back home now as there was a lot to do.

            Once we were backing home I started to clear the space for the tree whilst Tom went and found his Christmas boxes. For a single man he had a lot of decorations and I could see Lizzie getting giddy at the prospect of decorating another room and tree. It was something she’d always enjoyed and getting to do it twice in a year must have seemed surreal. She had a kindred spirit in Tom though, the pair of them sorting through the boxes deciding on what would go on the tree this year and what could be used to decorate the room. Tom had a lovely tradition of buying an ornament for the tree at least once a year from wherever he was working so a lot of the ornaments were not exactly Christmas themed but they all meant something very special to their owner. As the pile of desired decorations grew the stories got better. Tom had been very fortunate in filming locations and there were some truly beautiful pieces there, from hand decorated glass ornaments to slightly chunkier items with a decided lack of Christmas theme.

            It had been decided over breakfast that lunch would be light and quick so that we could all pitch in with the decorating, so whilst Tom and Lizzie, being the two tallest, set about decorating the room I went into the kitchen and made sandwiches, fresh fruit, yogurt and even managed to find some cake. Once all the food was prepared I took it to the dining table and set it up. The room was starting to take shape, tinsel had been hung on some of the wall hangings and draped along some of the less used shelves of the huge bookcase and the pile around the tree made it look like someone had sneezed Christmas on the floor.

            I managed to stop the workers and we sat down to a quick lunch, my wrist was still sore so I took some painkillers. Tom noticed and asked if it still hurt badly.

“I’m possibly over reacting” I admitted “but it did hurt after making the sandwiches”

“Right. Well we’ll leave that bandage on for another day and then see how it is after that, you may be able to go to some of that elasticated tube wrist support after that if we’re lucky”

I sighed internally, not wanting Tom to know how disappointed that made me feel, but it looked like I would now have some form of strapping or support on my wrist right up to Christmas, which I had not planned on at all.

            Lunch over Tom and Lizzie continued to decorate, the tree now being the focus, and I cleaned up the kitchen. I didn’t take long but the transformation in the room was astounding when I re-entered. The tree was nearly complete only the lights and tinsel to do but the rest of the room seemed complete. Tom came over and took my good hand gently, drawing me towards him and across the short space to the tree.

“Will you put the star on Darling?” he said a mischievous smirk on his face.

I stared at him “And how am I meant to do that?” I huffed “I’m the shortest one here if you hadn’t noticed!” It was true, Lizzie had been recently surprised to find out that she was taller than me albeit only by half an inch, but it was enough for her to feel really special about it.

Still with that smirk on his face Tom said simply “Do you trust me?”

“Implicitly” I replied “but how does that help?”

Handing me a huge star Tom pulled me so that my back was to his front “lock your knees for me please” Tom requested. Mystified I did as he asked and he bent his own knees and grabbed me between my knees and thighs holding me securely. I squealed a little as he straightened his legs and lifted me into the air, two steps and the tree was right in front of us and I quickly managed to get the star on the top. Tom reversed his steps and lowered me gently to the floor again, spinning me around to face him and kissing me soundly on the lips.

“Thank you Darling” he said.

“You’re welcome, I think” I said still getting over my surprise.

Lizzie and Tom put the rest of the lights on and the tinsel followed and suddenly it was all done. The tree looked fantastic and we hadn’t even turned the lights on yet. The rest of the room looked really good too, the tinsel on the frames and bookcase catching the light and sparkling and the random ornaments dotted around on shelves and side tables. The whole effect was a little mismatched but still very festive and suddenly I felt it was a shame we wouldn’t get to enjoy them more. It was then time for the big switch on, Tom took the room lights and Lizzie the tree and once the room lights were off the tree was turned on. They only served to heighten the twinkling and it really felt like Christmas.

            Tom then produced the first presents to go under the tree, they were for all of us from Rodney and Claudia and I devoutly hoped that Tom had reciprocated because there was no way anything would get to them in time otherwise. When I mentioned it to Tom he told me not to worry. When he knew he’d be in America so close to Christmas he’d ordered something truly English on-line and had it delivered in plenty of time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, if you had told me when I started this story that I'd end up with well over 100 chapters and over 6000 hits at time of posting this I wouldn't have believed you. For those of you who have been here from the start Thank you for your continued support. For any one else, Welcome and I hope you continue to enjoy the story.
> 
> Kudos and comments are always welcomed :-) Love to you all Roo


	102. Chaper 101

            Now the tree was complete Lizzie got up and made a hot drink for all of us and Tom and I finally got to catch up on our news after the previous day’s aborted attempt. It turned out Tom also had a small pile of Christmas cards addressed to Lizzie and I which he’d been asked to look after and deliver by various members of the I Saw the Light cast and crew which surprised me greatly but also gave me a warm feeling inside. There was one from Harri of course but also Wendy, Vince and Elizabeth and one from Marc addressed to all of us which was very sweet of him. We worked out that we would indeed be spending most weekends in London between now and the wedding with all the awards shows and the Age of Ultron reshoots, in fact there was something on every weekend between New Year and the wedding. Tom was still adamant that he would give me dancing lessons in time for our first dance but we reasoned that they could be a mid-week thing as we would both be free most weekdays, re shoots allowing.

            I knew I was in trouble though when a slow grin spread over Tom’s gorgeous countenance. “Darling” he said carefully “how many of The Avengers have you actually met?”

I shrugged “Hems obviously and I think most of the others were at the London engagement party, weren’t they? Why?”

“Oh, yes they were. I was just thinking that it might be nice for you to spend some quality time with them all before the wedding”

“Tom!” I said the warning clear in my voice “What are you thinking?”

“Oh nothing much” he tried but could tell I didn’t believe him “Ok” he said sighing “as far as I can tell all the main actors are in London for at least part of the two week reshoot time frame and everyone is here for at least one weekend but not all of them are here at the same time so I was thinking about hosting a couple of dinners those weekends and wondered if you’d mind cooking? I mean we could go out for the meals but think about the paps, a nice relaxing meal would be the last thing that would happen.”

I stared at him in shock, was he seriously suggesting that I help him host three dinner parties over three weekends?! I could see the rationale behind the idea though. I knew The Avengers cast got on really well when they were filming Avengers Assemble and I could see that, although we would have some time together at Eddington Court as we all gathered for the ‘meet and greet’, it would be nice from Tom’s point of view to have them already know me a little before then. Tom mistook my hesitancy in answering as a negative and added quickly “I will help as much as I can you know?”

“I know you will Love” I said “I think it should be alright as long as there are no food plans to take into account and they won’t be expecting anything too elaborate. I’m a passable cook, but I’m no Michelin starred chef you know?”

Tom shrugged “I haven’t had anything I haven’t enjoyed yet, you’ll do fine”

“Fine” I sighed “but it will probably be boring for you as the best idea for me is to do the same menu every time, then I can bulk prepare in Wiltshire and transport to London to finish off.”

Tom beamed at me “Thank you Darling, that’s so good of you. I really appreciate this”

“Yes, well you sort out guest lists then and I’ll sort menus” I said a very resigned tone in my voice that Tom didn’t notice; he already had his phone out emailing his friends to find out the exact dates they would be around. That done he turned to me and beamed again. “This is going to be so much fun. They are brilliant you know”

I suddenly realised it was getting late and we hadn’t eaten yet. It had been a very strange Sunday by all measures so it almost seemed appropriate to have a strange Sunday meal as well instead of the traditional roast. Looking through the fridge I found lots of eggs, some sweet peppers, courgettes, spring onions and lots of salad leaves. A cupboard yielded some potatoes and I realised I could make quite a healthy meal of vegetable omelette, oven chips and salad. The whole thing would be ready in less than 45 minutes so I got to work peeling and chipping potatoes to par boil and then finish in the oven. The vegetables were washed, diced and fried in a very little oil in a pan. Luckily Tom had a nice large frying pan so the whole thing could be made without the need for individual portions. A further search of the fridge revealed some smoked bacon that I couldn’t resist adding to the pan, having decided long ago that most savoury egg dishes could only be improved by the addition of this ingredient. The potatoes were ready to be drained, dried and placed on a baking sheet, a generous spray of some low calorie cooking spray and they went into a hot oven. I washed the salad leaves whilst I was waiting to finish off the omelette. This wouldn’t be a traditional French style dish though, but a hearty thicker version, more like a quiche but not cooked in the oven, which would give it a lighter texture. I whisked the eggs and added a generous sprinkle of mixed herbs to give it a bit more flavour. When it was time I put the pan on a low heat and added the eggs to the softened vegetables and cooked it gently until the eggs were very nearly set. I finished off the omelette under the grill and cooked it until it was beautifully golden.

            Tom and Lizzie were deep in conversation so I laid the table quickly after the food was prepared and we sat down to eat together, tired but pleased with the day’s work. The tree looked wonderful, Tom had an extra reason to be excited about the re shoots and Christmas was just around the corner. We would be leaving for Suffolk on Christmas Eve, late morning so that we could spend the rest of Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Boxing Day with Diana and her guests before travelling back to Wiltshire via London again. I was so pleased that I’d wrapped the majority of the presents before Tom got home, including all of his though because my wrist, despite hurting less than previous days, still didn’t have the range of painless dexterity that was required for that activity. Even making all the food today had required a change in my knife technique. I hoped Tom was right that it wasn’t broken, though the fact that I could use it a little did seem to confirm his diagnosis. Lizzie and Tom cleared away the dishes as I didn’t want to get my bandage wet, well that was my excuse and I was sticking to it!

            It was at that point Tom realised that he hadn’t given us our gifts from America. Lizzie got a new charm for her bracelet in the shape of a diamante covered American Flag, which she loved and Tom had gotten me a beautiful bracelet. It was comprised of small silver stars that had been enamelled in all the colours of the rainbow. It was very delicate and gorgeous and had to be put on my wrist straight away. Lizzie and I thanked him profusely, having not really expected anything after Tom had paid for our flights in October and then all the flowers this month. The best gift for me of course was having him home in one piece for Christmas.

            Lizzie excused herself to her bedroom soon afterwards and Tom and I stayed where we were cuddling on the sofa. It felt so nice to be in his arms again I could have stayed there forever.

            We inevitably spent some time going over wedding plans and Tom got really serious when it came to talking honeymoons. He’d obviously been checking his commitments and was very hesitant to tell me that our honeymoon would have to wait until the school summer holidays, as he could finally let me in on a big secret, that he was to play Jonathan Pine in a TV adaptation of John Le Carre’s The Night Manager opposite Hugh Laurie, Olivia Coleman and Elizabeth Debicki. I was so pleased for him that I couldn’t be cross about delaying the honeymoon, because this could really boost his career, not that it needed boosting in my opinion. It also made life a lot easier for Lizzie and I because her main exam season was due to run from May to June and stability was key for her success; having to keep moving around whilst various other people looked after her as her mum and step father enjoyed their time together would not be conducive to good exam results. Having our honeymoon in the summer made a lot more sense and Tom promised to make it one to remember.

           Going through the various pages of the book that we’d started so long ago I noticed a couple of glaring omissions.

“Love, do you realise we haven’t got a cake sorted, or wedding rings for that matter” I said

Tom scanned the pages in front of us carefully and concluded I was correct. His response surprised me though “Don’t worry about the rings Darling, I have something in mind for that but we do need to be in Wiltshire for it and as for the cake…” there was a twinkle in his eye as he thought about it. “Did you have anything in mind?”

“I honestly haven’t thought much about it. If we want a rich fruit cake though it really needs to be organised soon so it has a chance to mature a bit, I’m not really a fan of that type of cake though. I hate marzipan!”

Tom looked at me as if I’d grown another head “You don’t like marzipan?” he queried “How is that even possible?”

I shrugged “I’m proof it is. The thought also occurs that with all the children we will have there the less traditional cup-cakes may be the way to go. We will still need something to cut though and I refuse point blank to let you shove any cake in my face!”

“Noted!” said Tom smiling and then getting slightly more serious “Right, so that narrows down the options especially if we intend to keep a layer for a christening cake”

“Oh goodness! I hadn’t even though of that” I said “or children in general to be honest, though I’m not adverse to the idea” I added quickly as a look of disappointment flashed across his face. He gathered himself together rapidly and said “Now that is definitely a conversation for another time. Back to cake!” and he waggled his eyes at me, making me giggle. He was so adorable sometimes it was untrue. It had been quite a surprise to find out that his actual personality was toned down somewhat for the media. The Tom the fans thought they knew was not a patch on the real thing, nothing was too much trouble for him to make sure I was comfortable with every part of his life but especially the celebrity side of things. I had discovered that the only time he wasn’t so attentive was when he was prepping for a role and in those instances I simple took over and took care of him as well as he took care of me.

Tom had to tap me gently on the arm to drag me out of my train of thought “Cake?” he said again with a little pout.

“Yes Love cake. I know it’s important” I responded

“How about two small tiers and cupcakes then?” he asked

“Just two tiers?” I queried

“Absolutely” he replied and ticked them off on his fingers as he spoke “A small one to keep for the future, a slightly larger one for us to cut and for the traditionalists and then lots of cup-cakes for all the rest. I may even know someone who could make it all for us!”

“If you did Love that would be brilliant, we ought to check with Leanne at Eddington Court as well though, she may have some ideas too” I mused

“Good idea Darling, first thing after Christmas we’ll spend some time finalising arrangements. We will have final numbers by the end of January anyway so it will be all up to Leanne then” remarked Tom.

“Yes” I agreed “I know we don’t seem to have used her much but she will be worth her weight in gold after Christmas. With all we have going on I can see us forgetting something important. I’ll email her after the holidays and see when we can go and see her again to talk to any outstanding items”

“Excellent Darling, we should have a full plan of attack by the end of the first week in January then, just in time for the reshoots!”


	103. Chapter 102

            The next two days were as hectic as I’d suspected they would be. We managed to squeeze in drinks with Ben and Sophie which was very nice. The men talked ‘shop’ and Sophie and I compared notes on wedding preparations which was really comforting for me as we seemed to be at the same point which was impressive as officially she’d only been engaged since November. They were having a smallish wedding on the Isle of Wight at Mottistone church and the reception at nearby Mottistone Manor, which was incidentally the home of the owners of the original ‘War Horse’ a horse that survived the trenches of the First World War and made it home again against all the odds. I thought it was very appropriate seeing as that was the film where Tom and Ben met and became firm friends. Sophie expressed her concern that their wedding would interrupt our plans and I told her not to be silly, at the same time hoping ours didn’t interfere with theirs too much. Sophie explained that they were going away for a few days after their wedding but they had a rather important appointment in Hollywood the Sunday before our wedding. Ben had been nominated for an Oscar for his portrayal of Alan Turing in The Imitation Game and I knew Tom was already planning to have a little party, just for two, to watch it with me and cheer Ben on from home. Having satisfied ourselves that we weren’t putting undue pressure on each other with our wedding dates Sophie and I turned to the other important thing happening in her life and she quizzed me about as much as I could remember about being pregnant.

            We also had a really nice day with Tom’s dad, James, who invited us around to his for an early Christmas meal. Tom used the opportunity to pick up the hire car we were going to use for the holidays. It was a nondescript estate car but perfect for us with all the luggage and the presents that we had to get everywhere. Tom seemed very pleased with the car and refused to let me even have a go at driving it!

            James lived in a lovely house a couple of hours outside London and the drive was uneventful but the scenery was stunning in places. It was a part of the country I’d never been to and I drank in the views eagerly. Tom seemed vaguely amused by my enthusiasm but forbore to comment. When we got to James’ Tom jumped out of the car with his usual grace and came round to open the door for me as Lizzie clambered out of the back, bringing the bags of gifts for James as she did so. Tom led the way to the front door where his dad was waiting. I could already smell the delicious unmistakable aroma of roasting turkey wafting out of the kitchen.

            Tom and James greeted each other with a big hug and then James turned to Lizzie and I with hugs and kisses on the cheek. James lived on his own and was cooking for all of us so instead of heading to the living room we all sat in the kitchen diner. James took one look at my wrist, which had thankfully progressed to the point where I did only need an elasticated tube support, turned to Tom and said “I guess you’re on kitchen duty with me then my son”

“Nothing I’d enjoy more Dad, it’ll be nice to cook with you again” Tom replied winking at me. From the way Tom navigated his dad’s kitchen I got the impression that this wasn’t the first foray the Hiddleston men had made into cooking together. I knew their relationship had been fraught for quite a while since James and Diana had divorced and then Tom had started to pursue his chosen career, but that was obviously all behind them now. Between them they cooked a lovely lunch, it was, as I’d surmised. Roast turkey with all the trimmings including pigs in blankets and stuffing that Lizzie declared was nearly as good as mine which was high praise indeed. In deference to Tom having to drive and my own low tolerance we had an exceptional non-alcoholic wine that was so good Tom made a note of the name so he could make sure that we could enjoy it again.

            The only thing I could help with was when James decided to flambé the Christmas pudding but didn’t have a clue how to go about it. He soon learnt that just pouring brandy over the hot pudding and trying to light it wouldn’t work. Luckily it was a skill I did possess; using a metal ladle I carefully warmed some brandy over a ring on the hob and when it was hot enough lit it in the ladle and poured it quickly but carefully over the pudding. It worked perfectly and the flames engulfed the stodgy dessert completely with a bright blue colour. They went out quickly and James cut and served the fruit filled pudding. I got to witness Tom’s sweet tooth again as he managed to find room for a second helping, though goodness knows where he put it as the whole meal had been delicious and filling. When we’d finished eating we all pitched in to tidy away and in no time at all it seemed that we were sitting in the living room next to James’ tree with cups of coffee. We had decided to exchange and open presents whilst we were all together so that we could enjoy the recipient’s reaction. Tom and I had gotten James a set of books he had been after for ages and he was really pleased with them. After asking Tom for his help Lizzie had decided to get James a bottle of Isle of Jura Prophecy whisky which he exclaimed over happily.

            James had gotten Tom an exclusive bottle of Jameson whiskey; it seemed the Hiddleston men were more alike than they cared to admit. He’d also managed to get Lizzie tickets to her favourite American band that was touring the UK later in the year. Lizzie was ecstatic and raced across the room to give James a big hug and kiss which completely caught him off guard though he recovered quickly. It was a reaction he definitely wasn’t expecting from her but it was also gratifying to see their reactions. James had gotten me a beautiful dressy watch, with a gold and silver twisted rope strap and a delicate face in a small body. It looked elegant and sophisticated and would go with all my outfits. The silver and gold colouring also meant that I could wear it no matter what other jewellery I was wearing and I was really touched at such a thoughtful and practical gift, though I definitely detected Tom’s hand in the gift choices.

            We spent a convivial afternoon and evening with Tom’s dad, watching a couple of films Tom had recommended. James told us about the first time he’d visited Tom on a film set and how taken aback he was by the amount of work that goes into making something look as effortless as Tom makes it seem. With Tom’s blessing Lizzie and I told him about our recent trip to America and the I Saw the Light filming. I’m pretty sure in the process of talking about it we managed to allay any lingering fears James may have had over his son’s choice of partner; as far as I was aware he’d never said anything negative about me to Tom and it was probably my own lingering insecurities that made me think it but I would have been naïve indeed not to think that there were people who thought that I was marrying Tom just for his money or other nefarious reasons but they were so far from the truth. If James thought I had an ulterior motive for marrying his son I couldn’t blame him. Tom’s star was definitely in the ascendancy and was only going to get higher so any father in the same position would think the same, even if their son was adult enough to make his own decisions. We did, however, part on the best of terms with hugs all round and promises to meet up again before the wedding.


	104. Chapter 103

            The next day was Christmas Eve which I seemed to spend in a state of stress. It all started going wrong almost as soon as I woke up and went to make a cup of coffee. I was holding the coffee canister in my left hand, which I’d thought was finally healed from my fall but obviously I was wrong. By the time I realised that it hurt too much to hold the container tight it had slipped from my grasp and spilled its contents all over the kitchen, accompanied by a curse from me. Tom got back from his run to find me on my hands and knees in the kitchen trying to clean up the mess I’d made. He took one look at the mess and then at me, helped me up off the floor and led me to the sofa.

“What happened?” he asked gently

“I dropped the coffee” I said exasperated “I was trying to clean it up before you got back”

Tom pulled me closer into a hug “Never mind Darling, it’s only coffee, I’m sure we have another packet somewhere. You just sit here whilst I clean up and see what I can find” Kissing the top of my head he stood gracefully and went to clean up my mess. I was so cross with myself, it seemed a silly thing to do and even sillier to feel the way I did. It didn’t even cross my mind that I might be subconsciously stressing about the next couple of days, I hadn’t even realised I was worried because everything was going well for us at the moment.

            Lizzie was spending all her spare time studying for her exams. Her mocks had been at the start of December and the results had come out just before the school holidays. She was doing really well and both Tom and I had told her how proud we were. There were just a couple of subjects that needed a bit more work and she was determined to improve on all her marks, she would be moving on to tertiary education the following September and had her heart set on music as a career. One of the many things on our ‘to do’ list after Christmas was to start researching suitable establishments in London in order that she could apply in plenty of time.

            Tom was reading The Night Manager in preparation for his role in the New Year, busy making annotations in the margins as he went and even going as far as to expand on them in a project book as he had more and more thoughts, even I was getting to grips with technology as Tom had helped me buy a new laptop to help with my cross stitch design enterprise but I suppose in the back of my mind my insecurities were always lurking. I was under no illusions that life married to Tom would be all plain sailing, our relationship was very strong and we rarely fell out with each other but so far I’d only really experienced the filming side of things, the long absence luckily proving to me that I could actually cope with it, but the fans were a different matter, Luke was very good at keeping us appraised of current feeling and to be fair it was all mainly positive. The pictures taken back in October at Shreveport Airport had done the rounds and had been well received, people mainly saying how cute we looked together. However there would always be negativity from some of Tom’s army of fans though and their unhappiness at Tom’s choice of life partner was disappointing but not unexpected. I did wonder if the fact that I’d freely admitted in my one and only interview that I’d been a fan long before I met Tom, had helped the majority of the fans realise that I was just lucky and that I only wanted what was best for him just as they did.

            Right now though my main worry was that I didn’t want to mess anything up in the next few days with Diana and her family. All families have their traditions at Christmas and the last thing I wanted to do was for Tom and his family not to do something in case it upset me somehow. The problem was that I didn’t know how to start the conversation that was required so I’d ended up stewing gently, knowing that today was the day we were travelling to Suffolk had concentrated my thoughts and precipitated my state of mind now. Tom though had an uncanny knack of knowing when things were not quite right with me, he was much better at reading me than I was him and so I meant that before long I was being soothed by those long lean arms as I inhaled the scent of fresh coffee and Tom cajoled me into telling him what was wrong. All my unfounded, but very real to me, fears came out as I talked and Tom’s expression morphed from concerned at the beginning to gentle amusement by the end.

“Oh my dear Silly Goose” he said, using the nickname he only used when he thought I was being particularly endearing. “There is really nothing to worry about. It’s only Christmas dinner, not a palace banquet. You’ve already met most of Mum’s guests and anyone you haven’t doesn’t matter that much, I’ve made sure you know everyone who is important to me. If anyone there take a dislike to you, unlikely but possible, it’s their problem not yours, and Lizzie makes friends at the drop of a hat so she won’t have a problem with a few new faces. We have a few traditions but the only one you need to worry about is that if it’s not raining, we go for a walk on the beach after dinner. Now have I helped at all?”

I nodded slowly but I could tell Tom wasn’t totally convinced. “Tell you what” he continued “how about we just hold hands all day again, I know it helped you tremendously the first time you met my lot”

I snickered when I heard him refer to his loving and supportive family as ‘my lot’

“Yes please” I said softly

“Consider it done” Tom said easily and then in a complete change of mood he continued “Now it must be breakfast time, I’m starving!” I giggled properly then as he used those expressive eyes to great effect. As it was cold out and it would be a long time until the next meal we decided porridge was a great idea so Tom measured and stirred whilst I chopped loads of fresh fruit and raided the cupboard for raisins and cinnamon. I even found some stewed apple in the freezer that I defrosted and warmed in the microwave in next to no time at all. Lizzie had joined us by the time the food was ready and I’d added a small pile of toast to the goodies already on the table and we sat down to eat. Tom, never one to knowingly break his word, kept a foot touching mine all the time we were sitting, subtly reminding me of his recent promise. He mentioned to Lizzie about the proposed walk along the beach the next day and that she should take a warm coat and good shoes for walking to which she nodded her agreement.

            Breakfast was soon over and cleaning up took hardly any time. We were aiming to get to Diana’s mid-afternoon and with a two and a half hour drive in front of us we had just enough time to check for anything we’d forgotten to pack, load the car, have a last hot drink and set off. The roads were quite busy, everyone heading to their families for the holiday season, but we still made good time, eating up the miles between London and Suffolk effortlessly. Tom had put a Christmas CD in the car and we sung along happily to an eclectic mix of Christmas chart hits and carols. Certain tunes necessitated the volume going up both on the stereo and our voices and we were all slightly hoarse by the time the journey was over.

            Emma had arrived before us and was standing at the open door waiting, having heard the car approach. Leaving all the luggage in the car for now Tom, Lizzie and I greeted Emma with hugs and kissed, as had happened six months ago Tom had dropped my hand for the greetings but unerringly found it again as he was released from Emma. We followed Emma and Lizzie down the hallway into the kitchen where Diana was fussing over a kettle for a very welcome hot drink. Emma took over so that Diana could greet us properly and show us to our rooms. Lizzie was in Sarah’s old room and Tom and I were in his, Diana having explained that although there were other people staying Christmas night we were the ones staying the longest so we got the ‘good’ beds. Now we knew where we were sleeping Tom and I trundled down to the car to get the luggage and I overheard Lizzie asking Diana which room the tree was in as she was in charge of the presents. Lizzie looked really disappointed when Diana said that the tree wasn’t up. I’m sure she thought there would be no tree at all, so it was really funny to see the look on her face as Diana went on to explain that they always put the tree up on Christmas Eve as it used to be the one time they could guarantee that all available family members would be together. I could see why Tom got particularly excited by Christmas if this had been his build up since he was young. In fact Tom and Lizzie wore matching expressions of delight. Tom because he knew this would be happening and Lizzie because she got to decorate yet another tree, there being no question of us being excluded from this tradition.

To make our lives easier Diana’s tree was already potted and sitting happily in the garden next to the sack truck that would be used to drag it through the house. That task fell to Tom and he cheerfully enlisted all our hands to lift the tree onto the base plate and then carefully manoeuvre his load through the house to the family room. Diana had amassed a load of decorations over the years and we had a lovely time decorating the tree and room. Lizzie had the honour of putting the angel on top, Tom lifting her effortlessly. Diana also produced a holly wreath for the front door and with a very familiar mischievous look on her face a sprig of mistletoe. Tom immediately broke a small piece off the main bunch and tucked it in a convenient breast pocket, keeping eye contact with me all the while and saying

“Well, we don’t want to keep blocking the doorway now, do we Darling?”

I just rolled my eyes at him as he took the main bunch and hung it in the entrance to the family room. And then of course he just *had* to check that it was in full working order! Luckily he settled for a brief soft kiss on the lips sparing all of us the embarrassment of him potentially getting carried away. He’d been as good as his word about being in constant contact with me with the exception of losing hands so that we could all decorate the tree. If Diana and Emma had noticed they declined to say anything

            Once the final decorating had been done we decided that the floor at the base of the tree was far too bare and so we all trooped to the various locations in the house that presents were being stored and carried them all to the family room. We’d always sorted our present into separate piles right from when Lizzie was very little so it seemed a bit odd to watch Tom and Emma put them around the tree in a very haphazard fashion. There was a small pile of flattish packages put to one side however, they looked identical, wrapped in cheery cartoon Christmas paper and I was very intrigued. Tom noticed my interest and said softly in my ear “There may have been another tradition I omitted to tell you. The first present we are allowed to open is just before bed on Christmas Eve and is always pyjamas no matter who you are” He started pinking adorably around his cheeks and on the very tips of his ears as he continued “I may have shocked Nanny Servaes in my early teens wandering around in just my boxers on Christmas morning. Mum has insisted on full pyjamas ever since and to make sure no one can forget, she buys them for us too” as I looked again I could indeed see five packages “and I suppose she got Lizzie’s and my size from you?” I said, keeping my one light and teasing. Tom went a couple of shades darker as he nodded. “You don’t mind, do you?”

“Mind about what?” I asked “You not telling me about another tradition, or the fact that Diana now knows my dress size?”

Still decidedly pink on his cheeks Tom mumbled “Umm, both I suppose”

“Its fine Love” I said quietly “it’s not ideal but it is fine”

Tom looked very relieved at my words and relaxed slightly. I couldn’t be too cross really because I may have had a tradition of my own that I’d deliberately forgotten to mention. Lizzie and I always did each other a stocking for Christmas morning that we opened together in bed before we went downstairs at whatever time we decided. The only two rules were that it had to contain Cadbury’s chocolate coins and there was a £10 limit on the total contents. It was amazing how creative and silly you could get with such a small amount. I’d decided to extend the stocking giving to Tom, but hadn’t told him, thinking I’d let him experience it once before he had to actively participate next year. To mark the next stage in our lives I’d managed to get stockings that had been specifically designed to be stitched on and I’d beavered away in secret making sure that Tom, Lizzie and I all had a decorated stocking for Christmas Morning. I wasn’t too worried about what Tom would think as I reasoned that it would appeal to the child that always seemed to be lurking below the surface, but had become very evident in the last few days as my man-child got more excited the closer to Christmas we got.


	105. Chapter 104

            The excess decorations were swiftly packed away and then Diana announced it was time to eat. I was curious because I’d neither seen nor heard any food preparation taking place and I was even more confused when Tom got my coat from the closet in the hallway.

“Where are we going Love?” I asked as Tom helped me into my favourite coat.

“Mum’s idea” he said easily “with all the cooking taking place tomorrow she decided a stroll to the local fish and chip shop would be ideal, very little cleaning away to do and to be honest I’ve been craving them since I got back so I wasn’t about to argue. Now where’s Lizzie?”

“I suspect she’s with Emma, you know those two are as thick as thieves?”

“I had forgotten” said Tom ruefully “I expect they’ll be along in a minute, Emma’s not one to turn down fish and chips”

“Neither’s Lizzie” I said with a smile as the par of them clattered down the stairs into the hallway. Lizzie had put on a deep green hoodie over her shirt but showed no sign of grabbing a coat. Tom noticed and decided to say something as Emma got her own warm looking garment out of the closet.

“Have you got your coat Lizzie” he queried as he checked his own coat was securely fastened and then grasped my hand. Keeping her tone respectful Lizzie answered “I’ll be fine in my hoodie thanks Tom”

Glancing at the gorgeous man next to me I could see he wanted to say something more but I gave his hand a little squeeze and when he looked directly at me shook my head minutely. He looked puzzled at my reaction but acquiesced to my silent request and remained quiet.

            It was a reasonable stroll to the chippy with Emma and Lizzie even outpacing Tom with his long legs in their eagerness to get there, though he was modifying his stride so that his mum could keep up. When he was sure Lizzie wouldn’t overhear him he turned to me and said “So what was that with Lizzie and her lack of coat?”

“Ah” I said “welcome to the wonderful world of parenting a teenager. You have to pick your battles very carefully. For instance, it’s slightly chilly tonight but it’s not freezing or raining so Lizzie will be fine without a ‘proper’ coat, and if she gets cold? Well maybe she’ll listen to us next time, but I wouldn’t hold my breath!”

On Tom’s other side Diana was chuckling and nodding her agreement “You weren’t too bad Tom, but when Sarah and Emma were Lizzie’s age they thought they knew better than me most of the time and Jackie is absolutely correct, you have to let them find out for themselves; they remember better then”

Tom groaned “I’ve got a lot to learn!”

Diana spoke again “Yes, you do but you’re lucky. Lizzie is a well-adjusted, well behaved young lady, Jackie has done a brilliant job with her, and she adores you so you won’t have as many problems as you think!”

I was so glad it was dark so no one could see me blush at Diana’s lovely words. It’s always gratifying to hear someone else praise your parenting, Mum and Dad had never imposed their child rearing philosophy on me after Sean had died; rather they followed my lead on things so that we still presented a coherent front on discipline and guidelines for Lizzie to follow but they were my rules. That had helped immensely when my parents were taken from us so suddenly; Lizzie had already known who was in charge. And Diana was also correct in her statement that Lizzie adored Tom as well as respecting him and his authority over her. She had confided in me that she was really looking forward to having him as her official step dad, even if it meant enduring more questions at school. I knew she’d handle them with the same sensitivity that she had shown when we were merely courting and newly engaged. Nothing had leaked out via her or any of her friends, as they had all promised at her birthday meal back in August, as I was sure that they used to talk a lot when they were together, I knew I would in her position.

            The aroma of fresh fish and chips was soon wafting towards us as we neared our destination and soon the welcoming glow of the shop was visible, spilling over the pavement and inviting us inside. In my opinion I was about to eat one of my favourite indulgences. I knew intellectually all that fried food wasn’t healthy in the slightest so we didn’t participate too often at home but it was very nearly Christmas and so time for a small blow out. The lady behind the counter greeted the Hiddlestons as old friends and I gathered quite quickly that this was another family tradition, probably sparked by Tom craving them when he was away filming at one point. Many try but no one does fish and chips quite like the English. Everyone ordered quickly, sticking to known favourites, mine was battered cod, chips with salt and vinegar and mushy peas which drew the usual disgusted face from Lizzie who wasn’t a fan of either the vinegar or the peas but I didn’t care, I loved them but only ate them from a chippy. Lizzie decided on chicken burger and chips and Tom joined Diana, Emma and I by choosing cod and chips. The food was ready quickly and Tom insisted on paying before anyone else could object. We headed home with haste not wanting our meals to get too cold, thought the shop had done its best to keep he food insulated. The walk back really didn’t take as long as getting there did and we all headed to the kitchen to plate out our respective meals.

            Sitting around the dining room table we ate in companionable silence, if you didn’t count Tom’s moans of appreciation over the first few mouthfuls until his mum shot him a glare that only mothers have and he desisted. I have to say that the food was delicious; the fish was creamy inside the batter and the chips were perfect; crunchy on the outside and soft and floury on the inside. It was no wonder the table was quiet as we ate, every one enjoying their meal too much for conversation. When we’d finished eating clearing away was easy too, everything simply went in the dishwasher in order to be ready for tomorrow. That chore done we spent some time preparing food for the next day, many hands making light work of the tasks set by Diana. I even managed to help lay the table for the next day, though my wrist was protesting by the time I’d put out the cutlery and folded the napkins into a mitre shape to give the table a nice look for Christmas dinner. The napkins were stiff linen and were coloured holly berry red or a gorgeous dark green to add to the festive feel. The dining table had to be extended to hold all the place settings required and I actually folded napkins for twelve! Tom was keeping an eye on me in case I needed any emotional support; realising that Christmas would likely be the time I missed my departed family the most so, of course he noticed me favouring my wrist somewhat by the end of sorting out the table. He went to ask his mum if she had any painkillers knowing full well that I wouldn’t ask for them on my own initiative. Thankfully Diana had ibuprofen in the house and a couple of tablets and a glass of milk soon dulled the ache but not before Diana had expressed concern over my wrist and even more so when she found out how long it had been hurting; making Tom promise to take me to get it checked out if it wasn’t better soon.

            Finally, when as much had been prepared as possible for the next day and a last hot drink had been made for those that wanted one, we repaired to the family room and all snuggled together on the sofas and comfy chairs. Tom pulled me down so I was practically sitting on his lap and dodged all attempts I made to make him let me sit by myself. Diana and Emma seemed not to mind too much and Lizzie thought it was hilarious from the look on her face. When it was obvious that I was there to stay Tom relaxed his hold slightly and smiled benevolently at me “Think of it as practice for tomorrow Darling, seats will be at a premium then, you’ll see” which just left me wondering exactly how many guests Diana was expecting over the course of the day, I mean I knew we had twelve for dinner as I had helped lay the table!

                        When it got to about 11pm and we noticed Lizzie yawning fit to split her head open we decided it was time for bed. Diana gave out the five identically wrapped gifts and we all smiled broadly as Tom, his inner child obviously to the fore, ripped off the paper with all the enthusiasm of a five year old, though I have to say he was closely matched by Lizzie who was mere seconds behind him. The smiles only got wider, if that was at all possible when we actually saw the pyjamas. Goodness knows where Diana had found them but they were all of the T-shirt and soft bottoms variety. Tom’s depicted The Cookie Monster which had Lizzie and I in stitches, Lizzie’s featured My Little Pony, and Emma’s and I both had Disney Princess ones. Emma’s was a montage of all the princesses and mine was Cinderella which I thought was most appropriate for the woman who’d found her Prince Charming; especially was it was pretty well agreed in the fandom that since Disney had brought Marvel Tom was a bona fide Disney Prince! Diana’s own pyjamas were of a more traditional floral print.

            Once the paper was tidied away we headed for our respective bedrooms, hugging and kissing each other goodnight as we got to our respective doors. It was a really nice end to a day that had started so badly for me. As I said goodnight to Lizzie I whispered in her ear “Come in to us in the morning, just not too early” Tom still didn’t know about the stockings, I’d managed to secrete ours under the bed and was determined that they would be on show at the end of the bed before Tom woke in the morning. Quite how I would accomplish that feat was still to be ascertained considering I was sleeping with a man who thought nothing of wrapping me up in his beautifully long limbs every night he had the chance, and then there was the fact that he woke up before me more often than not. Lizzie’s stocking was already in her room with the usual strict instructions that she was only to open it with us.

            The Christmas Fairies must have been smiling on me that night though, for in an incredible stroke of luck, not to mention very rare occurrence, Tom actually rolled away from me in the night and the sudden lack of pressure around me from his limbs woke me up. I took the opportunity to sneak the stockings out from under the bed and loop the hanging handles around the finials on the footboard, creeping back into bed after a scant few seconds, mission accomplished. Just in the nick of time too because as soon as I was back under the covers Tom unconsciously registered the lack of another body next to him, and groped around in his sleep until he found me lying down and hugged me close again, making me sigh in relief that he hadn’t actually woken and spoilt the surprise.


	106. Chapter 105

            I was woken Christmas morning by sleepy kisses and murmured greetings. Craning my neck to get a glimpse of the bedside clock I realised that it was a reasonable hour and that Lizzie would probably be with us very shortly. I murmured my own greetings back at Tom and waited patiently for him to wake up a bit more and notice his surprise. It didn’t take long; as soon as he was fully awake he was a bundle of energy. I couldn’t believe that a grown man could look quite as boyish as he did when he realised that there was something new in the room. He practically crawled down the bed to grab the stockings on the end of the bed; he was slower on the way back, his progress impeded by the gifts grasped in his hands. The look of incredulity on his face was a joy to behold.

“Darling, do you know anything about these?” he asked as he turned around

I fought to keep my face straight as I said “Well Tom, it looks like someone was a very good boy last year and Father Christmas has decided to reward you”

He didn’t buy it for a second, not that I really expected him to, but answered in the same spirit

“And I suppose Father Christmas has learnt to sew over the years has he?” as he turned to stockings around so that I can see the designs and names I’d stitched.

It was getting harder to keep my smile off my face as I pretended to ponder the answer to that question finally coming up with “well he has to do something for the other eleven months of the year”

Tom sat back on his heels, still on the bed and gave me a look that was pure Loki, and in his best Loki-esque voice said “Now Darling, think very carefully before you answer. Is there anything you want to tell me?”

It was impossible to keep up the pretence any longer, not only was Lizzie’s appearance imminent but the look on Tom’s face told me that if I didn’t answer quickly, and truthfully the whole house would be woken by my screams of laughter as he tickled me ruthlessly. I definitely wanted to avoid that so I said “Happy Christmas Love, that’s just a little something to keep you going until the rest of the presents later”

In an instant Loki was gone and Tom was back, looking at me in wonderment “You did this for me?” he queried.

“Yes” I said simply and went on to explain the rules of the Christmas Stocking “so you see” I said in conclusion “ it’s just a bit of fun really, next year we can pair off and two can do the stocking for the third person, the same rules will apply though”

“That sounds wonderful Darling” was Tom’s response “and thank you for including me this year”

I scoffed “Well I wasn’t about to leave you out now, was I? We are a family in all but name you know?”

Tom was spared answering by a knock on the door “That’ll be Lizzie” I said quickly “we always open our stockings together” Tom got off the bed and stocking still in hand went to answer the door. Lizzie entered looking adorably sleep rumpled but not so asleep that she couldn’t fling her arms around Tom and wish him a Merry Christmas; a sentiment he returned with interest and an even bigger hug. They made the short trip back to the bed and when Tom got back under the covers, there was just enough room for Lizzie to sit between our legs at the foot of the bed. Without further ceremony we opened the small gifts in the stockings; apart from the mandatory chocolate coins which Tom exclaimed over as he hadn’t had any in years I’d managed to get small puzzle books for the pair of them, Sudoku for Lizzie and crosswords for Tom, and then, of course a novelty pen and pencil to fill them in. there was also a small bag of their favourite sweet shop sweets, mint humbugs for Tom and peach rings for Lizzie, a couple of pairs of Christmassy socks for each of them completed the gifts.

            Lizzie had gotten me some cola bottles, the non-sugar coated ones that I preferred, a pair of earrings shaped like a cartoon Rudolph and some bath pearls, ensuring I would have at least one relaxing bath sometime soon. The used wrapping paper was soon tidied away and the gifts returned to the safety of their respective stocking, Tom kept looking at his in wonderment and I was really surprised that such a simple thing had had such a profound effect on him.

            Checking the time we realised that we would have to get a wiggle on if we were not to be late to breakfast, with only one bathroom between the three of us it took a bit more coordination than we were used to, but we were all washed and dressed in reasonably short order. Lizzie was wearing brown trousers and a green hoodie that was designed to look like a Christmas tree, complete with pom-pom baubles, gold ribbon tinsel and a start on the point of the hood. I’d even spent an hour wrestling with a couple of sets of cheap Christmas lights and a needle and thread to complete the look, and the lights actually worked too! I’d gone for a smarter option and was wearing smart black trousers and a cerise blouse. I wore it with the top two buttons open a la Tom so that the Hiddleston pendant was on display. My new earrings from Lizzie were also a must. Tom wore his usual black trousers, white shirt and black waistcoat but he was also wearing the brightest tie I’d ever seen on him. It had a blue background with Santa, his reindeer, and his sleigh caroming across the widest part. Feeling in need of a hug to set me up for the day I stepped towards him and he opened his arms in invitation. As our chests pressed together the strains of ‘Jingle Bells’ could clearly be heard in the room, followed by ‘We Wish you a Merry Christmas’ I jumped slightly at the sound and Tom had an attack of the giggles which threatened to turn into a full on belly laugh as he squeezed his tie and it started playing the tunes again. Tom’s laughter was so infectious that in seconds we were all giggling merrily.

“Where in the world did you get that?” I asked when I’d stopped giggling long enough to string words together coherently.

“Believe it or not, I found it in a little Christmas shop some years ago now. I only wear it on Christmas Day now though” was Tom’s reply.

“I should hope so” I retorted “I bet it can get really irritating”

“Let’s see, shall we Darling?” Tom grinned as he activated the tunes again. It was worse this time as Lizzie had decided she needed to sing along and make up a silly dance to go with it. I decided there and then that I wasn’t going to attempt to be the voice of reason today as I usually was when the pair of them got in one of their silly moods. I was sure they wouldn’t listen to me anyway.

            When we were as composed as we would get Tom pointedly took hold of my hand and led the way down to breakfast. We were greeted in the kitchen by Diana and Emma who wished us a merry Christmas with hugs and kisses. Breakfast was a fun affair, cereals and warm rolls being the order of the day. Nothing too heavy as lunch would be a big meal as tradition dictates. Breakfast was over quickly, cleared away and then it was time to prepare for lunch. It was all hands on deck as we peeled, chopped and otherwise prepared the vegetables for the meal, Diana not believing in preparing the vegetables too far in advance, saying soaking them in water leached out all the goodness. It looked like it would be a magnificent feast, the turkey had been put in the oven since very early in the morning as it was a big bird and needed hours to cook. Lizzie was set to work wrapping chipolata sausages in streaky bacon to make her favourite pigs in blankets; Tom was set before a mountain of potatoes as we would be having roast and mash apparently. Emma was handed a large bag of carrots, half a dozen parsnips and another peeler; Diana took care of the Brussel sprouts herself and asked me to wash the lovely savoy cabbage she handed me.

            I’d had a quiet word with Lizzie about remembering her manners in other people’s homes and not complaining if she was offered something she didn’t like so I was surprised to hear a groan from her end of the table. When I shot her a look over my shoulder because I was busy at the sink I saw her hand smothering her own mouth and her eyes dancing with laughter, Tom looked resigned and Emma looked embarrassed as Diana shot her a glare.

“I know neither of you are big fans of cabbage, but I like it and so we’re having it!” she said in a tone that spoke volumes of a conversation had many times before. Tom and Emma just nodded and Lizzie’s eyes were still dancing at the sight of grownups getting chastised. I suddenly remembered how my mum used to cook that particular variety of cabbage for special occasions and hesitantly spoke up.

“Diana? I hope you won’t be offended but my mum used to have a delicious recipe for cabbage, would you like me to try it for you?”

Diana’s face was suddenly wreathed in a smile so reminiscent of her son it was incredible to see. “Oh could you Jackie?” I always just boil it but you can see how well that goes down!” I looked across at Tom, still busy peeling potatoes and the look of encouragement he gave me was all the push I needed “Just one thing though” I stipulated “if anyone asks, you found it somewhere, it didn’t come from me.” Diana looked totally perplexed at my request so Tom stepped in to rescue me. He shot me a questioning glance first and I nodded slightly, I knew he wouldn’t do or say anything to embarrass me and he knew his family much better than I did. I was hoping that his usual eloquence would help him explain why I was reluctant to have my praises sung. Discarding his vegetable peeler he stood up and was beside me before I knew it, one long arm wrapped protectively around my shoulders and the other one reaching across me to grasp my hand and effectively stop me from my task too. Giving me a fond kiss on my temple he faced his mum and sister and started to speak.

“I know I can trust you both that this will go no further than this room today, I only found out myself yesterday morning. Jackie has been worrying herself sick about this visit but didn’t know how to tell anyone so has been bottling it up and suffering because of it. She’s worried she’s going to mess something up or that her being here will somehow inhibit our normal Christmas celebrations” he gazed at me then, fondly but with a touch of exasperation “I have told her she’s being silly but maybe she needs to hear it from more than this source”

Diana’s and Emma’s faces had fallen at Tom’s words and Diana reacted first, joining Tom in hugging me she said simply “I’m so sorry. I had no idea you were finding this so hard. I hope I haven’t made it worse?”

I swallowed hard and tried to speak “I’m sorry too” I stuttered “It’s not any of you, it’s all me. I know I’m being silly but I can’t help it. I really don’t want to spoil anything and I just didn’t know how to start that conversation. I really want to get everyone’s good opinion of me over the next two days, these guests are your family and I really want them to like me”

Diana shushed me gently “I hope that you will have no problems on that score Jackie, actually I think you will only have four new people that you haven’t met yet; and Tom hasn’t met two of them either”

I felt, rather than saw Tom react to his mum’s declaration and then he voiced the question I could sense on all our lips.

“Mum, who exactly is coming to lunch today?”

Diana took a step back, out of the hug so that she could see both of her children, who were wearing matching expressions of interest on their faces.

“Well” Diana started “there’s us of course, that’s five, and Susan, Nick, Lucy and Caitlin, you’ve met them Jackie, except Nick; he’s Susan’s husband and Susan is Tom’s cousin as you know from my sister. So that’s nine and then there’s Adrian and Linda from my bridge club, they have no family to share with and then, Great Aunt Ethel.”

The last name was said so quietly I missed it but I couldn’t fail to feel Tom’s reaction to it. His whole body physically shuddered, drawing me in closer as he involuntarily tightened his hold on me.

“Great Aunt Ethel is coming here today and you didn’t think to tell us?!” he practically hissed at his mum, leaving me to wonder who this woman was that provoked such a reaction in my normally jovial fiancé.

“Thomas!” Diana exclaimed, obviously cross with him all of a sudden “That’s not the way you talk to me and you’d better not talk to Aunt Ethel like that either, you know better than that!”

“Yes Mum. Sorry” came from above my head, Tom realising that he’d overstepped the mark by a considerable degree.

“Who is Great Aunt Ethel?” I asked tentatively, not really wanting to stoke whatever had caused Tom to react like that, but also needing to know if she was someone I should be wary of today. Tom deliberately loosened his grip on me, belatedly acknowledging how tight his grip had gotten and said.

“Great Aunt Ethel is Mum’s maiden aunt who reacted even worse than Dad when I announced what I wanted to do with my life. She hates the arts with passion and didn’t even approve of Mum becoming a stage manager, let alone me wanting to be an actor.”

“However” added Diana, still glaring at Tom, “her only living family all happen to be gathering here today, except Sarah of course, so I invited her to dinner and to stay the night” I hadn’t thought it was possible for Diana’s glare to intensify but she managed it as she practically dared Tom to say anything, he knew better of course and kept quiet. Diana turned to face Lizzie, her face suddenly smiling again. “Lizzie dear, I hope you don’t mind but I’ve put you in with Emma tonight as Aunt Ethel will need Sarah’s old room” Lizzie nodded vigorously possibly not wanting to annoy Diana any more.

“How is Aunt Ethel getting here Mum?” Emma asked quietly

Diana sighed “Luckily for you two” she said fixing Tom and Emma with yet another stern look “a neighbour of hers is passing our way on their way to their family and have agreed to bring her here and pick her up again after lunch tomorrow so you don’t need to worry about being stuck with her in a car on your own.”

Still beside me Tom let out a gentle sigh which unfortunately for him Diana heard “Thomas! I expect you to behave like the gentleman I brought you up to be whilst Aunt Ethel is here however much she winds you up, and yes I know she does!”

“Yes Mum” said Tom meekly still miffed at the situation he found himself in. I just hoped that this Aunt Ethel wasn’t as bad as Tom and Emma seemed to be making out she was and that now this unpleasant interlude was behind us we could enjoy the rest of Christmas Day. We all returned to our allotted tasks quietly, I finished way before everyone else so asked Diana if she had the ingredients needed for mum’s cabbage. I only needed some butter, onion, bacon, fresh nutmeg, the cabbage of course and a large saucepan to cook it all in. Diana had everything except the fresh nutmeg but a quick search of her spice rack revealed a jar of ground nutmeg which we deemed an acceptable alternative. It was still far too early to actually cook the cabbage though so I decided to see if I could help anyone else.


	107. Chapter 106

            Seeing me at a loose end Diana handed me the rest of the sprouts to prepare whilst she fixed us all a drink. I stuck to coffee whilst Lizzie had fruit juice and everybody else has a schooner of sherry. It did smell good but as per usual for me, I didn’t want to jeopardise anything by having alcohol. I knew Tom had managed to get his hands on a couple of bottles of the delicious non-alcoholic wine we’d discovered at James’ and I was looking forward to having that with my lunch, mainly because it would negate the usual questions about why I wasn’t drinking. People tended to jump to conclusions of their own if they didn’t know me and the two most obvious responses were ‘Oh are you teetotal?’ which I’m not or ‘are you pregnant?’ Again, another question that didn’t need to be aired on Christmas Day. I had just finished the sprouts when the front doorbell rang. Tom and Emma exchanged a quick look that luckily for them Diana didn’t see as she was already heading into the hallway. Diana opened the door and a lot of excited chatter filled the air and we realised it was Susan, Nick, Lucy and Caitlin. A mini tidal wave of people entered the kitchen and Lucy and Caitlin made a bee line for Tom who swiftly stood up to intercept them. I had had regular contact with the girls and their mum whilst Tom was away but that was mainly about bridesmaid’s dresses and, of course, Tom had deliberately been kept out of that loop. It had been quite difficult to impress on the younger girls the need for secrecy regarding what they would be wearing that day; we didn’t want Tom to have any idea about the dresses except the basic colour. I was fairly sure he didn’t even know mine was going to be gold. As Tom greeted his younger cousins with hugs and tickles I managed a brief word with Susan as she introduced me to her husband Nick. She assured me that the girls would let nothing slip; in fact they were very excited about having a secret from Tom as he was normally the one having to keep secrets about forthcoming projects. I made sure I introduced Lizzie to Nick as well and then the younger members of our gathering excused themselves and dragging Lizzie with them went to find somewhere quieter to play.

            Before long the doorbell rang again and this time the look that passed between Tom and Emma was well founded. Tom found my hand and held it deliberately and firmly as a new voice could be heard in the hallway, greeting Diana politely enough but even I could hear the underlying tone of disapproval held in it. Diana led her guest into the large kitchen where all the adults were still gathered and offered her a seat and I got my first good look at Great Aunt Ethel. I could see a slight familial resemblance between Ethel and Diana but not very marked. Aunt Ethel was one of the ‘blue rinse brigade’ her naturally white hair tinged by blue. Why older women did that I shall never know. She wore a smart twin set and really didn’t look like she was in her late eighties as I knew she was, her skin looked amazing apart from some wrinkles around her eyes and I found myself wondering if she had a hideous portrait in her attic just like Dorian Grey! I mentally shook myself from those uncharitable thought, though I made a note to mention it to Tom if he looked like he needed light relief at the end of her visit.

           Aunt Ethel’s bright eyes lit on me almost immediately, as I was the only stranger to her in the room, moving his hand so that it was in its more accustomed spot around my waist Tom stepped forward to introduce me to the formidable looking little old lady seated at the table, plastering on a smile that I soon realised was entirely fake. ‘Actor Tom’ to the fore I thought as he opened his mouth to speak and I felt sorry for him that he didn’t dare be himself even today in his old home.

Bending down to kiss his Great Aunt on a cheek he stepped back and drew me close “Aunt Ethel, may I introduce my fiancée, Jackie”

“Pleased to meet you” I said, holding out a hand to shake. Aunt Ethel took my hand and I was momentarily surprised by the strength of her grip as she eyed me up and down.

“So you’re the girl who is insisting on getting married in the back of beyond!” she said, shocking everyone in the room as she continued “Why on earth don’t you get married here?!”

Tom had stiffened beside me but was utterly dumbfounded by his great Aunt’s words. No wonder he wasn’t happy she was here! I decided to speak up though; I didn’t want her to think I was totally intimidated by her. I remembered that Tom had told me that I’d already met all of his family that were important to him so I could only assume that Aunt Ethel didn’t rank high on that list, if she was on it at all. “Well that is where I come from and it is close to where Tom and I met so it seems appropriate” I got out, with a small smile for Tom as I mentioned that fateful meeting.

“Humph” was Aunt Ethel’s only reply to that. How rude I mused and suddenly had the horrible thought that Aunt Ethel probably didn’t know my history as it was, and I mentally braced myself for some awkward questions during her stay.

            Just then Lucy, Caitlin and Lizzie clattered in to the kitchen, drawn by the strange voice I suppose, though I was glad that I hadn’t had to call Lizzie to meet Aunt Ethel as that would have smacked of bad manners on Lizzie’s part and I knew I’d brought her up better than that. Aunt Ethel took one look at Lizzie and pursed her lips in disapproval, probably of Lizzie’s outfit; the girls had turned the lights on – they were flashing merrily and looking really festive.

“And who are you?” Aunt Ethel said shrewishly

“Hello” said Lizzie, completely unfazed by the obvious dislike emanating from the lady opposite “I’m Elizabeth, Jackie’s daughter. It’s a pleasure to meet you. You must be Tom’s Great Aunt Ethel?”

“I am” Aunt Ethel admitted. She turned her attention back to Tom and I “Thomas I hope you haven’t stolen this woman away from her rightful husband?!”

I could feel Tom’s fist clenching at my waist and reached around to give him a little squeeze to show him that although his anger was justified taking it out on his Great Aunt was not the answer. It also proved my earlier fear that Aunt Ethel was not in possession of all the facts pertaining to my previous life. In my peripheral vision I could see Lizzie go pale and tense at the same time as Tom and I sent Emma a pleading glance, hoping she’d understand and take Lizzie out of the room before she said or did something we might all regret, which to my relief she did, rounding up Lucy and Caitlin in the process and herding them out of the room on a hunt for board games.

            I could see my longed for happy Christmas disappearing in front of my eyes as I wondered how to react to the aspersions cast on mine and Tom’s character by a woman who was definitely old enough to know better. Diana broke the silence first “How dare you Aunt Ethel!? Remember I told you about Jackie’s husband and her parents dying when you phoned me to complain about the wedding venue and say you weren’t coming!” Her tone was uncompromising and I could tell she was livid under her surface demeanour. It also explained why I hadn’t recognised the name as it had only appeared on the list of invitees and I’d never seen it again.

“Oh that” said Aunt Ethel dismissively “I didn’t realise you meant this girl!”

“Honestly Aunt Ethel, how many great nephews have you got getting married next year?” riposted Diana “I think you need to apologise to all of us. I brought my children up properly and I know none of them would do or say anything as callous as you have today!”

Taking in the looks of outrage and shock on the faces of most of her adult living relatives Aunt Ethel finally accepted she’d overstepped the mark and gracelessly apologised to us all en masse with not even a special mention of Tom and I whose honour had most been called into question. Aunt Ethel was also made to apologise to Emma and the girls when they hesitantly reappeared which she managed but still with bad grace.

            Diana turned to Tom with a tight smile “Tom dear, why don’t you take Jackie out and show her the garden? I know there’s not much to see except the orchard at the bottom but maybe some fresh air is a good idea?”

At Diana’s words Tom snapped out of his anger and turning to me with a look of pure love and gratitude, acquiesced to his mum’s request. Pausing only to grab our coats from the closet and put them on we made our way through to the back door and proceeded down the garden. When Tom was sure he was out of earshot of the house he let vent his feelings about his Great Aunt in one long rant, using words I’d never heard him use before outside of a performance and words he dared not use in front of his mum.

“Is that better?” I queried when he had finally finished.

“Not really” he admitted “but it will have to do I suppose. I’m so sorry Darling, if I’d known Aunt Ethel was coming I would have declined the invitation”

“And I would have just accepted again on your behalf” I said evenly “do you really mean to tell me that you are going to get that awful old woman ruin our first Christmas together?”

Tom’s eyes snapped to mine from where he had moodily staring at the ground “Of course not” he said “I just wanted the first one to be perfect” and he let out a big sigh.

“Well” I said kindly “that chance has gone, but that’s no reason to make the rest of our time here miserable. If we both continue to treat Aunt Ethel with respect, even if she doesn’t deserve it, then we know we have done nothing wrong”

“And once again, my darling Jackie is the voice of reason” Tom said as he planted a chaste kiss on my lips “I’m not really sure who is looking out for who anymore today!”

“We are a couple “I said gently “we hold each other’s hand and look out for each other”

Tom smiled happily “Yes I suppose we do” he said as he gathered me in his arms for a hug “We’d better go back though or they may send out a search party!” I giggled, happy to see his mood lifted a little and we made our way back to the house.


	108. Chapter 107

To say the atmosphere inside was tense would be an understatement of such epic proportions that I suspect a new superlative may have been needed. Nobody was making much eye contact with anybody else and the girls were conspicuous by their absence. Aunt Ethel was nursing a sherry and I just hoped it mellowed her instead of riling her up even more. I volunteered to help Diana in the kitchen as it was time to start cooking all the vegetables, after checking with Tom that he would not object if I left him with his great aunt. Susan and Nick were still there so he had a bit of moral support but I knew that as soon as it was physically possible I would be back in his arms again.

            As Diana and I turned on the rings under the various pots and pans and checked on the turkey, parsnips and potatoes that were already in the large oven, she apologised again to me for her Aunt’s behaviour. My curiosity got the better of me and I had to ask if Diana knew why Ethel was like she was to her and Tom.

“I do know, as a matter of fact” said Diana sadly “but Tom doesn’t, though after today’s outburst I will have to tell him after Ethel has gone home tomorrow. It’s actually quite sad. When she was a young girl Ethel loved the performing arts and really wanted to be an actress, only to find that what was acceptable at local amateur dramatic level really wasn’t good enough for her to make a career out of it, and when she turned to behind the scenes roles she didn’t have the creative flair for that either. Her dreams were crushed by lack of talent and it hit her really hard, so she turned her back on her passion and vowed never to have anything to do with the Arts again. Seeing me, and to a greater extent Tom, be successful, has made her envious and she shows that in the way she treats us. She never married, as you know, so has never anyone to temper her jealous streak”

“That is sad” I said. Aunt Ethel made a lot more sense now, though it did not excuse her bad manners especially as she was a guest in someone else’s house. I just hoped that she managed to curb her acerbic comments for the rest of her stay. I was suddenly hit by a terrible though “We haven’t gotten her anything” I gasped “or Adrian and Linda for that matter, we knew Susan et al were coming, of course, Emma told us”

Diana patted my arm reassuringly. “Don’t fret Jackie; I’ve got it all in hand, there are gifts from you both to them under the tree, all you have to do is sign the tags”

I stopped what I was doing to turn and give her an enormous hug “Diana, you’re a life saver” I gushed “it would look so bad if we had no gifts for your friends and Aunt Ethel. I’d feel terrible”

Diana gave me a warm smile “I know my dear, that’s why I made sure it wouldn’t happen” and then with a twinkle in her eye she continued “Tom can pay me back later!” I giggled and with it felt the dissipation of a lot of the tension of the day, thank goodness. Just then the doorbell rang for the third time. “Excellent” murmured my hostess “that will be Adrian and Linda bang on time, can you keep an eye on the dinner whilst I go and make introductions?”

“Of course, no problem” I responded as Diana took her leave. The background murmur of voices rose slightly as Diana made her introductions and I could hear the surprise in the new voices as they realised who Diana’s son was. Fairly soon the new voices were coming my way and I could hear Tom with them as he decided to tag along, and make his escape without seeming too rude.

            I was introduced to Adrian and Linda as Tom’s fiancée of course and accepted their congratulations. Linda (call me Lin) wanted to know how we’d met and that story kept us all going until it was practically time to dish up and for me to start cooking the cabbage. I melted the butter in a large saucepan and sautéed the onions and bacon which I’d chopped into small pieces. When the onion was softened I added all the cabbage, a generous pinch of ground nutmeg and a small amount of water. Putting the lid firmly on top I left the pan on a medium high heat, only lifting the pan occasionally to shake it and mix all the components. The whole thing only took about ten minutes as I didn’t want the cabbage to wilt too much or lose any of its colour. It was just enough time for Diana, with Tom’s help to transfer the rest of the dinner to gorgeous china serving dishes and tureens in preparation for taking to the table. there were so many plates, dishes and tureens that I wondered how it would all fit on the table until I got into the dining room for the first time that day and found out that the sideboard, a beautiful old piece of furniture, had been transformed into a warmed side with the addition of heat pads and hot plates meaning that once passed around the table any dishes could be placed on the sideboard to keep warm. It was an elegant solution to an age old problem.

            As the de facto man of the house Tom was given the honour of carving the turkey as the rest of us made ourselves busy filling our plates with delicious looking vegetables and accompaniments. I was extremely pleased to see a bowl of bread sauce on the table. I hadn’t had any for a few years as Mum had stopped making it when our family got smaller, Lizzie didn’t like it and so I didn’t bother making it just for me, you could get packet mixes but they weren’t the same. When we’d all been served our turkey Tom sat down next to me and his foot was instantly pressing gently against mine. I pressed back, echoing my sentiment in the garden, we were a couple and in this together.

            Aunt Ethel was blessedly quiet during the meal, we all were to be honest, the quality of the food meaning no one wanted to stop eating long enough to start a conversation. I was gratified to see that the cabbage I cooked seemed to go down well, even Tom and Emma had some, despite their earlier reservations, but Tom was quickly learning that we had similar tastes in food, when he was allowed to indulge, and so if I liked it he probably would too. When our plates were cleared of all but the pattern Tom and I helped Diana clear the table and sideboard, Susan joining in due to the large amounts of china and cutlery. We’d all done at least two trips before the job was completed and it was time for pudding. I was really looking forward to this bit because Tom had told me Diana made her own to a family recipe and that he had never tasted one so good. After my success at James’ I wasn’t surprised when he cajoled Diana into me flambéing the pudding. Seeing the evident anticipation on his face she gave in and produced a metal ladle and a bottle of brandy for me to do my ‘trick’. I decided it would need all three of us, one to hold the pudding, one to hold the ladle and one to light it. In deference to our hostess we decided to let Diana take the credit and so hold the pudding, which left me with the brandy and Tom with the matches. I didn’t fill the ladle too much and warmed it quickly over a gas ring slightly more than usual to allow for cooling as we walked down the hall. We made a strange procession to the door of the dining room as two of us were making sure nothing spilt. Once outside the door Tom lit the brandy and I poured the flaming spirit quickly and evenly over the pudding. Whilst it was still lit Diana carried it into the room to gasps of surprise from those still seated, even Aunt Ethel looked mildly impressed. The pudding was soon cut and served with a choice of thick cream or brandy butter, knowing there wasn’t a huge amount of brandy in the butter, after all I’d help make it the night before, I decide to indulge and have some of both. Tom raised an eyebrow but followed suit and the look on his face as he took his first mouthful was pure ecstasy.

“Why have I never tried that before?” he murmured in my general direction, like I could possibly have an answer for him.

“I don’t know Love” I murmured back “nice though isn’t it?”

“Mmm” Tom managed through his next spoonful and then when his mouth was clear again he said “Just the right amount of decadence for Christmas” and he shot me one of his brilliant smiles.

            Soon even the pudding was all gone and we all helped stack the dishwasher with as much as could be washed so that there wouldn’t be too much to do later. I’d made a start on the saucepans as they were being emptied before we ate so the bulk of the really dirty stuff was done. In the hubbub of conversation that occurred whilst all this was being done I clearly heard that coffee and mince pies would be served later, after our walk and present opening. I was very nervous about the present giving. I’d had no idea what to get anyone really and had pumped Tom for ideas, of course the only one that really mattered to me this time was Tom himself and no one seemed to be able to suggest suitable gifts for him so I just had to hope that he liked what I’d managed to get him.

            Diana clapped her hands sharply dragging me out of my thoughts and ending all the conversations.

“Right Ladies and Gentlemen” she started, smiling at Ade, Nick and Tom as the only men in the room “It’s time for our walk. The weather is clear and crisp so coats and gloves if you’ve got them for those walking. For those of you that wish to stay behind, please make yourselves at home but no opening any presents!” and she wagged her finger for emphasis. I giggled because as far as I could tell it was only Aunt Ethel, Ade, Lin and Nick who were staying and I couldn’t see any of them being tempted to look.


	109. Chapter 108

            Ever the gentleman, Tom retrieved my coat once more from the closest and held it for me to put on, sorting himself out as I did up my buttons to the neck. As we moved around so that others could get their garments I realised Tom had stood us in the living room doorway and he used the position to steal a kiss under the mistletoe. Lucy and Caitlin spotted us and made that disgusted sound so beloved of children when they spot adults being romantic. Tom and I grinned at them and kissed again just for devilment whilst they were waiting for their coats. Lizzie then appeared in just her Christmas outfit though she had turned the lights off, and no sign of a coat. I could tell Tom wanted to say something but he must have remembered the conversation from the night before and resisted.

            Once we were all ready Diana led the way down the drive and onto the main road, Tom and I bringing up the rear. The air had gotten decidedly chillier since just before lunch and it was only seconds before Tom popped the collar on his coat to try and keep his neck a bit warmer. As per usual he had me walking on the inside of the pavement and his left arm was draped over my shoulders whilst my right arm had slipped around his waist as we’d quickly discovered that this was the most comfortable set up for us when walking long distances due to our height difference. Seven inches doesn’t seem a lot sometimes but it can cause severe inconveniences.

            We’d only walked for about five minutes before we got to the sea front. The winter sun was still shining- though it was getting lower in the sky sunset was not for about another ninety minutes which I was assured would be plenty long enough for our walk. Lizzie, Lucy and Caitlin all jumped the short distance from the promenade, such as it was, to the beach proper, Tom dragging me along behind them as the rest continued along the wide pavement. Tom’s long legs made short work of the drop but I had a real problem stepping down onto things. A flight of stairs was one thing I could go up and down them to my heart’s content but stepping down from one level to another seemed to metaphorically trip me up. I’d never even been able to jump into a swimming pool because of my intense dislike of the stepping sensation so I stopped at the very edge of the prom not wanting to take the step. Tom stopped immediately he realised I wasn’t following and turned back towards me a confused look on his face.

“Are you not coming Darling?” he asked.

“Yes” I replied hesitantly, looking around some steps and not finding any.

“Well what’s keeping you then?” Tom replied, still confused.

“I can’t get down there” I said in a very small voice, thankfully aware that the rest of the party had moved on giving us a small amount of privacy and so were unable to hear me.

“Why ever not?” Tom asked

“It’s too high!” I said quietly

“It’s too high?” Tom echoed “Darling it’s barely two feet to drop”

“I know” I was practically whispering now “It’s still too high for me to step down though” I could see Tom really didn’t have a clue why this was proving so difficult for me but he took the initiative and stepped closer so that he was directly in front of me, grabbed me firmly around my waist and spun me onto the beach with a very elegant twirl.

“Thank you” I said sincerely.

“No problem Darling” Tom replied “Though I am somewhat confused”

His arms resumed their previous positions as we made our way down to the sea. I took the chance to explain to Tom about my severe dislike (I refuse to call it anything but a dislike) of stepping off stuff. He looked at me incredulously, then shrugged and said “I’ll know for next time then. Now, anymore quirks and foibles I should be aware of? Don’t hand Jackie a cup and saucer with the handle pointing the wrong way or else you’ll end up wearing it!?” I huffed at him but he continued light heartedly “Oh I know, Jackie only wears heels in months that begin with a ‘J’!” he chuckled at me and I found myself giggling too. When he put it like that it was ludicrous, however it was not something I felt I could overcome, having tried many times before.

“It’s not funny Tom” I said, trying to sound cross but failing.

“No” he admitted “But it is mildly amusing. I’ve never met anyone with that particular dislike before; however my solution did give me a brilliant idea for a photo I now want taken at our wedding.” As he spoke I could see it in my mind’s eye, him lifting and twirling me as he’d just done and me wearing dress whose skirt should flare beautifully. The looks on our faces one of pure joy.

“I think I might be persuaded” I said smiling “but you may have to try a little harder!”

“I’m sure that can be arranged Darling” he said with a smirk (well, I couldn’t let him get his own way all the time now, could I?)

By this time we’d made our way down the shingle beach to the very edge of the sea, Lizzie, Lucy and Caitlin were trying to skim stones and Tom joined in, trying to improve their technique as I stood and watched. I’d never thought I’d ever spend part of Christmas Day on a beach but here I was, despite the setbacks of the day so far, actually having a good time. The tide was in so the distance to the promenade was quite short. We could see the rest of our party wandering along and knew that if they turned around they would be able to make themselves heard by the girls with no problem, so Tom elected to wrap his arm around me again and continue our stroll along the sea shore, making sure to keep our feet dry. As soon as we were totally alone Tom turned to me, completely serious.

“How are you bearing up Darling? I know it’s not gone exactly to plan so far but I hope you’re having a nice time?”

“I’m fine Tom, really. It’s nice to have proper Christmas again; though I have never waited so long to open presents. Aunt Ethel is a pain, true, but what is life without a little friction? If life was perfect then it would be boring”

“Very true Darling” Tom responded “but I would have thought you would have had enough ‘friction’ in your life so far to never want any again”

“If that was true” I said gently, picking my words very carefully indeed “I would have declined your proposal, heck I would have probably turned you down as my boyfriend” Tom’s face fell, as I had known it would when he heard my words so I hastened to clarify them. “You’re not getting my point Love” I said gently but firmly. “I still said yes. I’m here with you and nothing can stop that, but I’m not blind or naïve. I’ve followed your career for a long time now. I’ve seen pictures of you in airports all over the world; I’ve watched Loki in Hall H more times than I care to admit to!”

He smiled slightly then, his memory of that incredible four and a bit minutes that immediately went into fan lore still vivid as I continued “and now I’ve even experienced what it’s like when you’re filming- from both sides. I know there are fans of yours that will always hate me because you fell in love with me and not them and that can’t be helped so there is always a chance that you will get hate mail because of me. I know it won’t be easy being married to you, not because of you but of who you are, if you see what I mean?” He nodded his understanding. “And I *still* wouldn’t change any of it for the world,” I emphasised “my life was never going to be perfect but with you by my side it will be so much better than it could have been. I’m sure the good will outweigh the bad and I want you to know I’m not going anywhere.”

Throughout the last two sentences Tom’s expression had been changing from concerned to outright joyful in slow increments as he actually heard the words I was saying. Suddenly I was in his arms again twirling around and around, my feet nowhere near the beach as Tom expressed his unbridled delight. When he finally deigned to put me down it was only to kiss me deeply and passionately. It was a good job he didn’t let me go because all the swirling had made me slightly dizzy.

“No one has ever, ever made me feel the way you do Darling, no one! I can’t tell you how that makes me feel that you will be with me come hell or high water. I love you so much right now you wouldn’t believe” he stated as he finally decided that we needed to breathe occasionally.

I knew then he knew I had no lingering doubts, sure my insecurities had not gone away and I didn’t really expect them to, but knowing he had my back as much as I had his was comforting to say the least. Our canoodling was interrupted by Caitlin clearing her throat in a very pointed way. When she had our attention she told us that everyone else was ready to head back to the house and would we be going with them or following on behind?

“With you” I said as Tom nodded his affirmation and we headed straight up the beach back to the promenade. As we got closer I could see matching expressions of fondness and happiness on Diana’s, Emma’s, and Lizzie’s faces and knew that our little display had not gone unnoticed. They may not have heard what we said but I was sure that our body language had told them everything they needed to know. The other thing I noticed particularly was how everybody else was hunched up against the cold except Lizzie who just looked really comfortable in the waning light. Tom noticed too and murmured in my ear.

“She really doesn’t feel the cold, does she?”

“Not often” I replied “I often have to remind her to take a coat in winter and even then she ‘forgets’ more often than not”

Tom nodded, filing the information away for future reference. He helped me back up to the promenade and we set off back to Diana’s for the continuation of the day.


	110. Chapter 109

Arriving back in the house we divested ourselves of our coats and gloves, Diana and Emma bustled off into the kitchen whilst the rest of us joined those who had stayed behind in the living room. Tom sat himself down on the end of a long sofa and pulled me down on top of him, he guided my descent so that I sat, rather than fell on him and he wrapped an arm possessively around me as he’d done the night before, daring me to try and get up. Not wanting to make a bigger scene than we already were if Aunt Ethel’s expression was anything to go by, I sat still and actually snuggled in a bit. It wasn’t long before Diana and Emma reappeared with a tea trolley full of cups, mugs, a plate of mince pies and a beautiful Christmas cake, much like wedding cake I wasn’t a fan but I did like mince pies very much, warm ones even more so. I wasn’t sure how Tom though he’d manage with me in his lap but at the same time dismissed it as his problem; he was the one that wanted me so close so he could deal with the consequences.     

            In order for all the adults to have comfortable seats the girls were relegated to the floor, not that they seemed to mind much as it got them prime spots for present delivery which I was sure was what Lucy and Caitlin were angling for. I was happy to see that they had included Lizzie in their little cabal; it would be nice for her to make new friends even if Tom’s cousins were a little younger than her, but the girls had bonded well and I had no worries about them the week of the wedding. Lizzie would have school for all of the proceeding week anyway and I was sure Lucy and Caitlin would have too but as the plans stood we were expecting them early evening on the Friday and for them to leave late afternoon on the Sunday. With no honeymoon straight away Tom and I had decided that as we had the whole hotel from Tuesday morning until late the following Monday evening we would spend the whole weekend at Eddington Court so that we could still act as hosts for all our guests whilst they made ready to depart, and so we could spend quality time with all of them.

            When we were all seated as comfortably as we were going to get and had drinks and food available Diana allowed the girls to start handing out presents. They were more than glad to and delved into the pile with great enthusiasm, quickly passing gifts to those nearby and eagerly searching for their own. Paper was torn off and squeals of delight and more decorous chuckles filled the room as we inspected what we had been gifted. I’d left the bulk of the present ideas to Tom, who’d insisted on us giving joint presents anyway, but I had managed to stitch a small vase of flowers and had it framed for Diana and Emma making sure I’d chosen their favourite varieties. I’d gotten Lizzie some merchandise from her favourite band, the same one James had managed to get her tickets to go and see as well as the usual gifts of i-tunes vouchers and ‘boring’ normal clothes as she put it, but I was well aware that her life, like mine would change significantly in February and there were going to be plenty of times that ripped jeans and band T-shirts simply would not do.

            The gift giving continued, Emma had brought me a stand for my needlework, which rested between the seat and your bottom so leaving both hands free to stitch without the need for bulky floor standing apparatus. We exchanged tins of biscuits with Ade and Lin, which made us all smile as we opened the simultaneously , and Diana had gotten Aunt Ethel a bottle of her favourite Eau de Cologne from us which she looked like she actually appreciated. We’d gotten Diana a beautiful silk scarf and pashmina set that Tom had spotted somewhere and he’d found Emma a gorgeous necklace and bracelet set. Finally there was just mine and Tom’s main gifts to each other and I made him open his first.

            It didn’t look much, just a thin rectangular package he size of an A4 piece of paper carefully wrapped in the most festive paper I could find. Tom opened it carefully and was obviously perplexed when he revealed a cardboard backed envelope designed so that things could be kept flat in the post. Locating the end to open, his long nimble fingers were fishing out the piece of parchment inside in no time at all. I’d had Tom’s present details transcribed by a calligrapher to give the parchment an authentic look and as Tom read down the page his eyes got wider and wider and his smile just kept getting broader. When he reached the bottom he turned to me and said

“Darling, is this for real?” I nodded in the affirmative so he continued speaking “You managed to organise a behind the scenes tour of The Globe Theatre and the RSC at Stratford-on-Avon just for me, and procure four pairs of tickets either to The Globe or Stratford to be taken whenever we want?”

“Yes” I said, so happy that my gift had been well received “we just have to give them a couple of weeks’ notice”

“However did you manage it?” Tom asked “The runs are normally booked out well in advance.”

“Well, apparently they always keep a few tickets back each performance for visiting dignitaries and the like so basically we will have one of those pairs” I explained.

“Oh Darling, it’s wonderful. Thank you so much. I haven’t been to Stratford in ages and to be able to go with you will make it even more special” Tom gushed.

There was now just one present for me to open and it was the ‘big one’ from Tom. He’d bought me lots of little bits and pieces; a couple of new books from my favourite author, , my favourite band’s latest album and such like but this parcel was rather large so I sat on the floor to open it, feeling grateful that I’d opted to wear trousers that day. Tearing off the wrapping paper revealed a large white box with no marking on it to aid my guesses as to what could be inside so I placed the box on the floor as opposed to my lap and lifted the lid. I was still no further forward in finding out the contents though as the entire box was filled with tissue paper. I glanced at Tom who had sat forward in his seat, eager to see my reaction to his gift but, apart from the eagerness in his face, gave nothing away. I carefully peeled back the layers of tissue paper and finally saw the dress I’d so admired in Shreveport, folded neatly but still looking as stunning as I remembered, if anything the contrast between the black heavy cotton weave and the chestnut coloured inset panels on the bodice was even more pronounced than I’d noticed in the boutique. As I lifted the dress free of its wrappings and packaging the memory flooded back of our meal out in Shreveport and seeing this dress for the first time. It had been a lovely night, just the two of us wandering through the shopping area like any couple in love and I was pleased to have a permanent reminder of that night.

            Tom spoke softly, as if only to me though I knew everybody else would be able to hear him. “I knew you wanted that dress as soon as you saw it and I also knew you would look gorgeous in it so I had Claudia pick it up the next day whilst we were on set and hide it in my room in the main house” He was right of course, I did love the dress and I already knew when it would get its first outing.

“Thank you so much Love” I said “and I must remember to thank Claudia when I see her” I rose from my place on the floor and enveloped him in a hug worthy of Thor himself. I could feel him chuckling against me because although I had put all my strength into that hug it had hardly affected Tom and he was laughing at my efforts. With all the presents now open we tidied away the used paper and returned to our seats, Tom once more pulling me down onto his lap. It was mid evening by now and we decided that some old fashioned games would be good fun. Quite a few had been found earlier when Emma had ushered the girls from the kitchen when Aunt Ethel had started casting aspersions on Tom and I and we set them up on whatever appropriate surface we could find. Aunt Ethel declined to join in but seemed happy to watch with a cup of tea to hand.

            Lizzie, Lucy Caitlin and Emma settled on Mousetrap which they thoroughly enjoyed, so much so that Lizzie decided to spend some of her Christmas money on a version for us. Diana, Susan and Nick got out a pack of cards and played a rather loud game of Nomination Whist and Ade, Lin, Tom, and I settled on a game of Ker-plunk, a childhood favourite of mine that I was thrilled to see again. It took a little while to thread all of the sticks through the various holes in the game piece but it was very satisfying to drop the marbles in the top with a clatter and for none of them to fall through first time. Then it was just a case of removing the sticks in turn, trying not to dislodge any of the marbles. It was great fun and to my surprise I won, having the fewest marbles in my collecting dish when the last one had fallen. We set up again and this time Ade won, we spent the time between turns chatting amiably about our lives. Ade and Lin had seen Tom in a couple of things and were astounded that they knew his mum without realising the connection. It was good to see that Diana didn’t boast about Tom, letting his work and talent speak for itself, and I knew I’d be just the same. All in all it was a lovely evening; we all ended up playing all the games, swapping places as we felt like but whatever I was doing Tom was too and if we weren’t always touching? Well a brief caress or hand squeeze conveyed the same sentiment.

            Finally, after a last drink we all decided to call it a night. Aunt Ethel had retired sometime earlier, to no one’s disappointment. Ade and Lin made their farewells and headed home whilst Susan, Nick, Lucy and Caitlin headed to the conservatory at the back of the house and I suddenly understood why this wonderful room had not been used all day. The floor was filled with two large airbeds so all the family had to do was get changed and into their sleeping bags. It wasn’t ideal but better than a long trek back to Newbury and with only semi teasing shouts of ‘first one up puts the kettle on!’ and more sensible goodnights we headed up to our respective rooms.

            Once we were sequestered Tom took me in his arms and sighed contentedly. Pulling back he looked searchingly at me and asked simply “Are you OK Darling?”

“Yes Tom, I’m fine” I answered “it was all fine, except for Aunt Ethel”

Tom snorted “Yes, she’s a real piece of work isn’t she?”

I nodded non-commitally, I knew what her ‘problem’ was now of course but it wasn’t my story to tell so I refrained from doing so.

“Anyway Darling, Merry Christmas” Tom said.

“Merry Christmas to you too Love, and thank you for today”

“The pleasure was all mine” Tom responded “but the day’s not quite over yet” he added checking his watch “so there is time for just one more present for you Darling”

I just looked at him, stunned “Tom…” I started but, for once, it was his finger over my lips that stopped me, surprised as he utilised a trick he’d obviously learnt from me.

“No arguing Darling” he said through his smile as he reached over to his bedside table and opened the small drawer. He pulled out a smallish rectangular package, beautifully wrapped in mistletoe covered paper and handed it to me “Just a little something else” he said “but I didn’t want to share this moment with anybody else”

I was completely mystified and sat down on the bed to open the gift. Under the paper was the jewellery box I’d been beginning to suspect from its size and weight but I was not prepared for what was inside when I lifted the lid. Nestled on a padded cushion was a pair of enamelled cowboy boots coloured to match my new dress but opposite, chestnut leather with black tooling so it would both match and contrast. Instead of a chain it had a bootlace tie and I realised that it could be worn nearly any length I wanted by adjusting the knot behind the boots. On closer inspection the aglets were inset with tiny rhinestones and sparkled in the bedroom light. I took it off its pillow to feel the weight and found it was heavier than I thought meaning it would hang beautifully whatever length I had it. Tom had come to sit next to me on the bed and he asked softly “Do you like it?”

I nodded vehemently “I love it; it’s so pretty and apt”

“I wanted to buy you actual cowboy boots” Tom confessed “but Claudia sat me down and told me in no uncertain terms why that would be a bad idea” I smiled to myself as I imagined how that must have gone, surprised that I hadn’t noticed Tom’s absence when I was with them in America as Tom continued “so I commissioned this for you instead”

I looked at him, shocked “You mean…?”

“Yes Darling” he smiled “just like you, it’s unique, the only one of its kind in the world!”

I was speechless so I did the only thing I could in the circumstances and hugged him tightly. I had never had anything ever made just for me before and the thought threatened to overwhelm me. Tom noticed straight away and stroked my arm in a soothing gesture until my emotions were under control again. “It’s OK” he murmured in my ear “it’s all OK.” I sagged against him, the final bits of stress and tension leaving me. I’d known of course that Tom was kind, caring and altogether wonderful but I don’t think that what that actually meant for me had fully registered before this point. I knew now that Tom was behind me just as much as I was behind him, loving, supporting, and doing whatever we could for each other in our respective lives and for the second time we’d entered the bedroom I was nearly overwhelmed. I’m not sure why a simple gift caused such an epiphany or really why I reacted so strongly but the only thing that stopped me breaking down again was Tom’s presence and I wondered if this was how he had felt in Shreveport before I arrived, hopelessly adrift with no inkling of how to put it right before I turned up. That was not a conversation I wanted to have right now though so I contented myself with lots of gentle sweet kisses as we got ready for bed in our Christmas pyjamas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the purposes of this story can we all please pretend that the Royal Shakespeare Company (who are based in Stratford-on-Avon and actually also run The Mermaid Theatre in London) run The Globe Theatre?


	111. Chapter 110

The next morning found us completely tangled up together as usual but the bed covers had gotten in on the act too and it was slightly complicated to extract ourselves. We managed, of course, but not without some serious giggling as we tried to work out whose limbs were whose and which bits were just lumps of duvet. When we were free Tom peppered me with gentle kisses again and I was content to lie in his arms for as long as possible until I smelt the delicious aroma of a full English breakfast wafting up the stairs and along the landing. Tom sniffed appreciatively and with a huge grin said “Breakfast Darling?”

“Breakfast!” I agreed and quickly got out of bed to pull some clothes on so that I was presentable to the other house guests, Tom following suit. Once we were ready we followed our noses to the kitchen and were promptly handed serving dishes full of bacon and sausages to convey to the dining room, it having the only table capable of seating us all. The table was covered with platters of eggs, scrambled and fried, mushrooms, fried bread, along with hash browns, and dishes of baked beans and tomatoes, not to mention the sausages and bacon that Tom and I carried and the veritable mountain of toast held by Diana bringing up the rear.

            Absolutely the best of all in my opinion though was the small plate of thick slices of black pudding! I knew it wasn’t to everybody’s taste but I loved it though I wasn’t surprised when Tom wrinkled his nose when he saw it. I guessed Diana must like it for some to be on the table and that Tom must have discovered very early on that he wasn’t a fan. However I didn’t feel even a little bit remorseful when I took a couple of slices to go with my bacon, sausage, mushroom, beans and hash browns, not being a fan of fried bread. I smiled at Tom when he did take some bread after he’d offered me some, noticing I didn’t have any and subtly shook my head at his silent query. I hadn’t noticed what was on the sideboard until Tom suddenly stood up and left the table only to return with a glass of orange juice for him and apple juice for me. Quiet thanks from me earned me a fond smile which still managed to light up his whole face.

            We all ate in convivial silence, even Aunt Ethel keeping her opinions to herself for a change and it was really nice just to spend time with a lovely bunch of people who would become my family in just over two months. Finally, when we’d all eaten and drunk our fill, everyone pitched in to clear their plates and take them to the kitchen where Tom, Emma, Diana and I scrapped leftovers, wash, dried, and put away a seemingly never ending line of plates, cups, glasses, bowls, knives, forks and spoons. By the time we were done I was ready for another coffee!

            We spent a quiet morning sitting around reliving Christmas’ past, sharing stories of particularly memorable years. It was fascinating to hear more stories of the young Tom and I was left with the impression that this had always been a special time of year for him; I hoped he would enjoy New Year just as much. Lunch was a quiet affair, Diana had cooked a huge ham and it was easy to boil some potatoes and prepare some salad, with some left-over turkey it made a lovely spread. It always seemed strange to have a cold meal in the middle of winter, but after the huge, heavy meal of the day before and the big breakfast it really worked. Diana had also made a large sherry trifle for dessert and I got a really strange look from Tom when I declined a piece.

“But Darling, didn’t you use to make these for a living?” he asked

“Test them actually” I corrected “but yes I did”

“Then why are you not having any?”

I shrugged “I don’t like jelly or soggy sponge for that matter”

“You will never cease to amaze me” he said quietly “you worked surrounded by food you didn’t like”

I shrugged again “Saved me eating them and putting on loads of weight I suppose”

Tom smiled at me “Now that I can understand, it’s a lot easier to resist something you don’t actually like” I could only nod my agreement.

            Once lunch was over and cleared away we all repaired to the living room once more and this time I sat gracefully on Tom’s lap with no prompting, causing him to beam broadly. He did stiffen slightly when Aunt Ethel joined us but she paid us very little attention as she sat reading the paper. It was when she decided to do the large Christmas crossword that we all got another shock from her, she actually asked us some of the clues in the hope we could help her. It was one of those crosswords that had a good mix of questions for all ages so that the whole family could join in. Tentatively at first because no one was really sure quite what Aunt Ethel was playing at we all joined in and a couple of lively debates were had over some of the clues. Aunt Ethel didn’t even object when Tom couldn’t bite his tongue any longer and answered one correctly. I knew he was holding back both on answering all the clues he knew but also at reacting to Aunt Ethel’s complete about face. She was even gracious enough to thank him when he got a particularly hard clue that no one else had an inkling on. We even managed to finish it without resorting to an internet crossword solver.

            Aunt Ethel’s lift home arrived late afternoon and once again Tom and I were surprised when, after saying goodbye to Susan, Nick, Lucy Caitlin and Lizzie Aunt Ethel asked to speak to Diana, Emma, Tom, and I in private. We ended up in the dining room wondering what it was all about, luckily for our nerves Aunt Ethel wasted no time in coming to the point.

“I’d like to apologise to you all properly for my behaviour Christmas Day, it was inexcusable and I greatly regret it. Diana I apologise for all the harsh words and the way I’ve treated you over the years, my own niece and I couldn’t bring myself to compliment you on all you managed to achieve. You have brought up a lovely family, I know it was hard for you when James left but you really do have lovely children. Emma dear, you have such a kind and generous spirit and I’m sure you will excel in whatever you do.”

Turning to me unexpectedly she continued “Jackie I’m afraid your first impression of me was not at all favourable. I have no excuses for that and I can only hope you will accept my apology”

Finally she turned to Tom and he quickly schooled his expression from the one of complete shock he’d been wearing seconds before to a very neutral one, giving nothing away.

“Thomas, I think I probably hurt you the most. I’ve never told you, but I have followed your career. I’m not overly keen on the comic book stuff I have to admit, but I can’t deny you have great talent. You are also kind, considerate and a perfect gentleman and I wish you, and Jackie and Lizzie of course all the happiness for the future. I am truly sorry to all of you for all the upset I have undoubtedly caused, and I sincerely hope I will get to see you all again soon.”

With those words she left, walking down to the car with us following her to the front door and even giving a little wave as she got in. To say we were gobsmacked is an understatement. Tom’s jaw had actually dropped open in shock and he shut it with a snap, only to open it again a second later to ask his mum

“What just happened? I mean you heard that too? Great Aunt Ethel actually apologised for something”

Diana patted him on the arm tenderly as she replied “There is something both you and Emma need to know Tom, and now seems a good a time as any to tell you” we went back to the dining room so Diana could relay to her children what she’d told me the day before. I had to pretend that I didn’t know, I didn’t want Tom or Emma to think I knew things about their family before they did. I managed successfully as Tom turned to me at the end of Diana’s story and said “Poor Aunt Ethel, it’s one thing to know you are good at something and not be allowed to do it professionally, there is always doing it as a hobby, but completely another to chase your dream only to be told you are no good. No wonder she hated me, she was jealous. If I ever get like that about something Darling, just start calling me ‘Ethel’ and I’ll soon stop. All those family gatherings she missed out on because she was envious. I wonder what changed her tune?”

“We may never know” said Diana “but at least you both know why she was like she was. I can’t tell you whether you should forgive her though, that’s between you and your conscience. Now come on, we’ve been neglecting our other guests”

We re-entered the living room and took our seats, well Tom, Emma and Diana took seats, I was pulled towards Tom’s lap again! We spent that afternoon idly chatting and catching up on all the news. Nick and Susan hadn’t seen Tom for a while so there was a lot to talk about there, nearly our whole courtship as it turned out. Tom had popped in to see them on his way home from Bath when the play ended and told them he had met me but they hadn’t been able to come to either of the engagement parties so had missed out on most of the rest. Susan and I were careful to steer the conversation away from what was being worn by us in two scant months and Nick was in awe of the stars that would be attending. I smiled as I realised I’d found a closet Marvel fan, he had to be, he knew too much information that only a nerd like me would know and I knew that we would have no trouble being friends. Tom and Susan were close cousins and I knew we would have regular meet ups which was something I was looking forward to.

            We had a late tea that night of sandwiches, cake and mince pies washed down with tea and coffee and then the girls decided they needed to watch Avengers Assemble which was fine by Nick and I too. Tom seemed resigned to being the centre of attention as we sat, or snuggled, and watched Loki at his finest. Predictably Lucy and Caitlin were worried about the ‘Puny God’ scene, even asking Tom how long it took him to recover from the beating The Hulk gave him to which his reply was ‘not as long as it took me to get the wheezing right!’ earning him gales of laughter from the rest of us. It was soon bedtime again and as I cuddled up to my wonderful fiancé in his ridiculous pyjamas in bed that night I reflected that, although certain things could have gone better, over all it was a really nice Christmas and something I would happily do again.


	112. Chapter 111

            The next morning I was awoken by a persistent but gentle rocking motion and a delightful voice whispering “Come on Jackie, it’s time to get up”

I whined a protest then turned my head towards the curtains and opened one eye a crack. It was enough to tell me it was still dark outside, though not pitch black. I whined again “Go away Tom! It’s far too early”

Tom’s tone changed to a wheedling one “Please Jackie, there’s something I want to do and I really, really want to share it with you”

I opened both eyes a crack as I turned my head towards my pleading man. To my surprise he was dressed warmly in jeans and a thick jumper. Seeing me looking at him he pulled out all the stops, and those amazing puppy dog eyes “Please Darling? I’ll go alone if I have to but I’d much rather have you with me” he cajoled

“Fine!” I huffed even as I swung my legs over the side of the bed. “What do I need to wear?”

“Something nice and warm Darling, then meet me in the kitchen, but quietly please, no one else is up yet and I don’t want to wake them”

“No, just me!” I muttered to myself as Tom slipped out of the bedroom. I couldn’t even hear his footfalls on the stairs as he descended. I grabbed my own jeans and a thick sweatshirt that I’d brought with me, just in case, and found a pair of warm socks too. Once I was dressed I tiptoed carefully across the bedroom, crept out of the door and made my way as stealthily as possible to the kitchen. I was really surprised I made it in one piece, considering I really didn’t know the layout of the furniture yet, or the position of creaky floorboards and stairs that were always a possibility.

            The door to the kitchen was closed but I could see light around the edges so I opened it gently and stepped in, causing Tom to look up from where he’d been bent over the kitchen side scribbling in a piece of paper.

“There you are Darling” he said happily but sotto voce “just leaving a note for Mum, and I’ve made us coffee.” He indicated two thermal mugs on the side “I’ve got your coat too” he added just as I spotted it on the back of the chair

“Tom” I said keeping my voice down too “what are we up to?”

“All in good time Darling” he said cryptically as he glanced at his watch “actually we’d better make a move. Come on” and he held out his hand. Holding on to our coffee we quietly made our way out of the house and towards the road. Turning in the opposite direction to the previous two times we walked for a short while. It was a decidedly chilly morning and I could see the sky lightening from my position tucked into Tom’s side.

            It wasn’t long before I could hear the sea and I knew then what we were doing up before dawn. We walked further until suddenly the sea was before us, there was no sea wall at this point just sand dunes and we picked our way carefully over them until we hit the beach. Tom led me over to a rocky outcrop and we made ourselves as comfortable as possible and waited for the sun. This was definitely a more deserted stretch of beach than the part we walked on Christmas Day, not even a dog walker in sight as we sat in companionable silence, sipping our coffee occasionally.

            As we watched the sky continue to lighten imperceptibly until it was a beautiful blue with lots of clouds visible, looking over my shoulder inland I could see the stars in the still dark sky behind us and I marvelled at the scenery all around us.

“This is my favourite bit” Tom said softly directing my attention to where the sun was just peaking over the horizon turning the clouds various shades of pink, red and orange, whilst the calm sea reflected the colours if not the shapes. It was the prettiest sunrise I’d seen in a long time and I sat mesmerised as the clouds changed before my eyes. I was so entranced it took me a moment to realise that Tom was talking, still softly not wanting to break the mood.

“I try and see at least one sunrise every time I stop over at Mum’s” he explained “watching the stars fade behind me as the sun rises, helps ground me and makes me focus on who I really am in the grand scheme of things. Fame is a fleeting thing, great fun but hard work when you’ve achieved it, however, ultimately we are all mayflies in the Universe, here one day and gone the next whilst the world keeps turning. It does me good to remember that when I’ve spent the day having girls screaming my name, hoping I’ll look their way and smile. In a few years’ time they’ll probably have forgotten they ever did that. And that’s fine, I don’t do this to be immortal, I do it because I love it and not many can say they get paid for doing what they love. I’m fully aware that this time next year my face may not fit anymore and no one will employ me, and I’ll have to find a ‘real’ job. I will have to be just Tom then, not Tom Hiddleston famous actor”

He turned to me as I gave him a sideways hug. “I’ll still love you” I said my voice full of commitment. “I’d love you if you worked cleaning the streets as long as you were still inherently you. I’ll be as honest as you’ve just been. I loved Tom the actor for a long time as you know, but I can say that the reality of being with you far outstrips the fantasy and I wouldn’t change any aspect of your personality for the world. Whatever life throws at us, if we stick together we can overcome it I’m sure.”

            When I’d finished speaking Tom showed his appreciation for my words and sentiment in his usual fashion, a searing kiss to my lips that made me breathless as usual and then lots of little sweet kisses between the phrases of this next sentence. “I don’t know *kiss* what I did *kiss* to deserve you *kiss* but I’m really *kiss* glad I did it!”

            The sun was fully above the horizon now, a ball of flaming orange in the sky and as the last pink tinges were chased from the sky we stood up to make our way back to Diana’s. Tom having re grounded himself and reaffirmed his purpose in life and me renewing my never ending commitment to him.

We took a different route home to Diana’s Tom explaining on the way that he knew this lovely patisserie in the town and he thought croissants and pastries were just the thing for breakfast, bearing in mind that although Diana knew we’d gone out I doubted she knew what time to expect us back. Tom sent her a quick text to tell her of his intentions and received a positive response so we made our way happily to the shop. It was just opening when we got there so we had the pick of the freshly baked produce and ended up with boxes of croissants, pain au Chocolat, cinnamon rolls and the inevitable baguettes. As we gathered the bags and boxes in our arms I remarked to Tom “At least you have two sets of hands to carry all this deliciousness now instead of just the one pair last August!” we both giggled then at the memory of Tom trying to get into his flat with arms laden with treats for Lizzie and her friends the day after her birthday.

“Yes” he replied as we set off towards our family “it’s a lot easier with two!”

Our breakfast idea was well received by all present especially when we offered the choice of hot chocolate or coffee. You could see the disbelief in Lucy and Caitlin’s faces that they might possible be allowed such a treat for breakfast, so much so that they were answering even before the question had finished being asked in case a grown up changed their mind and withdrew the offer. We’d managed to find a small convenience store open on the way home and stocked up on milk as well so as not to deplete Diana’s supplies with our impromptu breakfast. Having decided between us that Diana had done more than her fair share of the food preparation and cooking over the last couple of days Tom and I shooed her out of the kitchen as we warmed breads and pastries in the oven and milk on the hob. We even managed to find some way of working without crashing into each other which was an achievement indeed in a strange kitchen. Breakfast was ready quickly, the only wait being for the oven and we sat around the dining room table munching happily. I managed to arrange with Susan one more trip for me to Newbury to attend Lucy and Catlin’s final fitting of their bridesmaid’s dresses. It was really funny to see both Tom and the girls perk up at the mention of the wedding and even funnier to watch the girls mime zipping their lips shut, much to Tom’s confusion, and nobody seemed willing to enlighten him.

            It was soon time to say fond farewells to Diana, Emma, Susan, Nick and the girls as we were heading back to London for the night and then we were off to Wiltshire to spend New Year at the cottage, and in order for Tom to have a proper amount of rest from all the driving we wanted to leave Suffolk before lunch. There was our usual mad scramble to make sure we hadn’t left anything behind and then we were on our way. The journey home was smooth and uneventful; we stopped briefly at a supermarket for bread, milk and something for tea to tide us over at Tom’s knowing I was going to sit down and do an online shop for a couple of weeks that evening for delivery to the cottage the next afternoon.


	113. Chapter 112

            Arriving at Toms (Call me superstitious but I still couldn’t quite bring myself to call it ‘home’ just yet) was a relief for us all. We could regroup and digest all that had happened over Christmas, the good and the bad, though there was still plenty to do. I managed to get some laundry done and, of course bags needed to be unpacked and then repacked though Tom would need more space than Lizzie and I this time. Finally we could all sit down and relax with a hot drink and some toast and pate for a late lunch. Tom had invited Luke over for the evening, not for business but as his friend though I thought that we would inevitably start talking ‘shop’. To save cooking and cleaning though we were going to have a take away. It wasn’t a particularly Christmassy solution but it was the most practical.

            Luke was bang on time as usual and he greeted us all with hugs and kisses for Lizzie and I on the cheek. We sat around comparing our Christmases so far, when Luke heard about Aunt Ethel he was horrified at what she’d said about Tom and I, muttering something about her not knowing Tom as well as he did because we both knew Tom was not capable of such a thing. The subject of Christmas inevitably led to presents and we swapped gifts merrily. Luke had even gotten something for Lizzie and I which was incredibly kind of him. He waved it off as nothing or if we insisted as a small thank you for making his most difficult client a little easier to handle. All of our tongues were firmly in our cheeks through all of this as Lizzie and I just laughed and accepted the compliment graciously whilst Tom pretended to be upset off to one side.

            It was in this really happy atmosphere we sat down to a delicious Indian meal Tom had ordered over the phone. There seemed to be enough food to feed a large family, Tom having ordered a banquet to be sure of having enough for everyone. We really didn’t eat a lot of take-aways either in London or Wiltshire. I much preferred to cook myself, it generally worked out cheaper and I knew what had gone into creating each dish. Tom’s Christmas CD had made it in from the car and was playing gently in the background giving the whole evening a rather surreal ambience as we indulged in pakoras, masalas, kormas, naans parathas and rice. The conversation ebbed and flowed happily everybody talking about their personal plans for the upcoming year. Lizzie had her exams of course and Luke seemed genuinely interested in what she was intending to do afterwards so she told him of her hopes to go to music college and see if she could make a career.

            For me personally I couldn’t get my brain past the end of the coming February. I knew I had a couple of sewing projects in the pipeline including the wedding sampler for the lady in the village which was taking shape on my laptop but not, unfortunately in actual stitches on fabric. I knew I would have to knuckle down fairly quickly after our wedding.

            Professionally I knew Tom had award shows up to the wedding and afterwards he was off shooting The Night Manager which he was really looking forward to. Filming for that was relatively close to home, the furthest location seemed to be Marrakech in Morocco with the closest being either London or Devon depending on where we were staying that week! After the summer, when we would mainly based in London Tom was off again much further afield this time shooting Kong, Skull Island in which he had been cast as Captain James Conrad , the male lead. He was thrilled about this even though we already knew that there would be communication issues when he was in the Vietnamese rain forest for a time. We were being positive though and treating it as our first’ real’ test, though I was confident that we would be fine. On a personal level though Tom just said he was looking forward to being married and having someone special for him when he got home, preferably with a home cooked meal waiting, though he did dodge away from me quickly when he said that, not willing to risk my slap connecting with his arm. His eyes were dancing with mischief as he spoke so I knew he was teasing me.

            Conversation eventually turned, as I knew it would, to the wedding and meet and greet. Luke told us that all the tickets for both evenings had been allocated by ballot and the lucky winners had been informed. The tickets had been printed and would be mailed to the recipients in early February, trying to time them to arrive on Tom’s birthday. I was shocked when I heard how many tickets had been allocated, thinking that it would be far too many for our stars to get through in the time but Tom seemed nonplussed so I trusted his judgement. It still seemed odd that my little idea to try and give us a quiet wedding had morphed into a full scale production involving Marvel, the BBC and a host of Hollywood stars. Admittedly the stars were all coming for our big day but I still wasn’t sure who had had to negotiate a break in filming in order to attend. We confirmed exactly who would be attending and Lizzie’s eyes were as round as saucers when she realised the extent of the participants.

            Finally all the loose ends were tied up except when the stars would be arriving and I reminded Tom that it was his responsibility to find that out during the Ultron reshoots. When everybody was satisfied we’d covered everything Luke bid us goodnight and headed off home. Lizzie cleared away the leftovers and stacked the dirty plates in the dishwasher whilst Tom and I took the time to open some of the multitude of cards and parcels that fans had sent Tom. It was always surprising but gratifying to me to see how much his fans genuinely cared for him. Some of the cards were made out to Tom and I and he made a special point of making sure that I saw every one of those. The best ones were kept out to display and I could tell Tom was truly touched by the sentiments written in them. The gifts were the usual you’d expect, artwork and portraits in varying degrees of competency but all done with love and also various handmade toys, plushies and trinkets. Tom examined each one carefully, determined to give them the attention that the fans deserved. From the amount that Luke had brought with him I had a feeling that we’d be unwrapping all the way to New Years at least! Poor Tom was still feeling the effects of the previous days, the drive and the conversation with Luke that had contained a lot of details so it wasn’t surprising when we went to bed only about an hour and a half after Luke had left.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the shorter chapter this week, but I seem to be writing longer chapters now and so am gently catching myself up. I really don't want to leave you guys hanging again like I did when hubby was off work so if a shorter chapter is the answer then that is what you get.  
> Lots of love as always and please feel free to comment or kudos, or both if you want!


	114. Chapter 113

            Waking up the next morning I wasn’t surprised to find myself alone in bed. I’d figured that Tom would have to get back into his fitness regime pretty quickly after the unavoidable excesses of Christmas so finding the note between my fingers wasn’t a shock. I got up, had a shower and dressed in casual clothes, we were only due to drive back to Wiltshire today so I wasn’t too bothered about what I was wearing. Scouring the kitchen cupboards revealed what I’d expected, little or no fresh fruit and not enough ingredients for a full English breakfast. There was still however porridge oats and the thought of that warm unctuous substance sitting in our stomachs on the journey back home seemed a really good idea to me. On my search through the cupboards I remembered seeing a small tin of evaporated milk, quite what Tom was doing with it in one of his cupboards I wasn’t sure but it was in date and so I knew exactly what I would be doing with it.

            Emptying the contents of the can into a saucepan I then used the can as a measure and added another can and a half’s worth of water. I then added approximately a can full of porridge oats with a little ‘for luck’ and I left it to steep, knowing Tom would want a shower when he came back and that would give me time to cook our breakfast.

            Lizzie surfaced whilst I was waiting and after a brief hug ambled off to the second bathroom to take care of her own ablutions. Once she was dressed we didn’t have to wait too long for Tom and when he returned I was pleased to see that he had not returned with provisions. After a short kiss and hug because he knew I loved his ‘freshly exercised’ smell as much as he disliked it he went to clean up and I cooked our breakfast and made hot drinks for us all. Tom had never had porridge made with milk like this before and he really enjoyed it, once he’s gotten over his initial surprise at the taste; it gives the porridge a really creamy taste and a slightly yellower colour than usual but it was delicious. Over breakfast Tom asked if it would be alright to delay our departure to Wiltshire for a few hours as he wanted to try and get through some more fan mail before we left. I knew the grocery delivery was set for mid to late afternoon to allow for any delays in travelling so, with fingers crossed for a straightforward journey I said yes.

            Before we lost ourselves in the fan offerings again Tom made sure that he was fully packed for an extended stay in the cottage. We knew that Tom, at least, would still be busy in London most weekends and that I would be joining him as much as possible, but I also had Lizzie to consider and wouldn’t be going backwards and forwards every weekend, except for the fact that the reshoot weekends were set in stone we would be taking every weekend on a ‘case by case’ basis. I knew too that Tom would like me to attend at least one smaller award show before I attended the What’s on Stage Award show with him. This was due to be held the day after ben and Sophie’s wedding on the Isle of Wight and so made more sense for me to attend than the Bafta’s the weekend before which would be a much bigger event as well. Also Tom had not been nominated for a Bafta though he was presenting an award but the production of Coriolanus that he had been in just before he met me had been nominated for a total of five awards, three of them for individual actors, Tom included of course and so it made sense for me to attend the smaller event to ease me into this side of Tom’s job. An even smaller event, albeit with more nominations for Tom and the Coriolanus cast and crew were the Falstaff awards at the start of February. From what I could understand this would be simply a formal meal in a hotel with as many nominees present as possible and a presentation ceremony, no television cameras, no press even, just an official photographer and a press release the next day. It sounded like a perfect ‘in’ for me to this aspect of Tom’s life and although I was nervous it was something I thought I could deal with, and luckily so did Tom and Luke.

            With my little car packed, full to the gunwales once more with the accoutrements of three lives we took the time to deal with more of Tom’s mail, all three of us getting involved, making a reasonable dent in the huge pile Luke had brought with him and happily tidied away the rubbish when we were done. With Tom driving as usual we made our way to the cottage, as hoped there were no holdups and we didn’t need to rush. We arrived well before the grocery shop was expected and used the time to open some windows to air the place out a bit

            Tom made short work of unpacking his clothes, most of his good suits had stayed in London as that would be where he needed them so it was mainly casual stuff had made it into his case. This really felt like we were properly living together, that this would be our life together now, and I loved it! He was done just before the delivery van arrived and he helped cart the bags through to the kitchen even giving the driver a generous tip for his trouble. Deciding that this was a good time for to really learn where I kept stuff apart from the basics Tom asked me to direct him where to put everything away so that he would become more sure in my kitchen which was so much bigger than his little galley one that it was harder for him to navigate around my various cupboards but he had most of the groceries put away in fairly short order. The last thing to do in the kitchen, apart from making our evening meal was to put the kettle on for a very well earned hot drink. I’d even included a couple of packets of Tom’s favourite biscuits in my order which I knew he’d appreciate. After all his hard work I made Tom sit down whilst I made a simple pasta Bolognese for tea, the mince stuffed with vegetables for a hearty meal. Tom commented that he’d have to show me his method of cooking the ‘ultimate’ Bolognese sauce one time and I said I’d gladly let him.

            There had been a large pile of mail on the floor inside the front door and all the envelopes were opened between us and the cards up on strings that I’d put up around the room before we left for London, having a 6’ 2” fiancé certainly helped in that regard. As much as I’d been happy to see my name occasionally in cards sent to Tom I was really gratified to see his name in the ones from my friends, it made me feel complete in ways I didn’t even know I was missing which just confirmed for me that what I was doing was right for me and Lizzie, as Tom was as good a stepdad to her as I thought he’d be. Supper was soon ready and we sat down to eat around the kitchen table feeling nice and cosy.

            I was actually looking forward to a couple of days peace, Christmas had been great, apart from Great Aunt Ethel and even she managed to improve with time, but being around so many people for so long I had found a bit wearing purely because I wasn’t used to large families so much anymore, though obviously Tom had been brilliant with me all the way through, calming my fears and generally being a rock for me, and vice versa, me for him with Ethel. We had only one thing planned barring the New Year’s Eve Barn Dance and that was a meal with my best friend Louise and her family he next evening. Mind you this was another big family, Louise and her husband Steve had four sons, her oldest was just about ten months older than Lizzie and they were in the same school year, I was godmother to him and Louise was godmother to Lizzie. Steve and Louise had always been there for me and had accepted Tom as my fiancé unreservedly. Louise didn’t know it yet but I wanted her to be the one to give me away at our wedding. Lizzie would have been the only other real choice but she had enough on her plate with providing the music so I was going to ask Louis the next night.           

            Cards sorted and strung up there were just a few presents to open that I hadn’t bothered taking to Suffolk, they sat under the artificial tree Lizzie and I had put up what felt like ages ago. I’d even left a little one for Tom here so he wouldn’t feel left out. It didn’t take us long to have Christmas mark II and the three of us spent the rest of the evening snuggling on the sofa watching the Christmas offerings on the television.


	115. Chapter 114

            The meal with my best friend’s family went swimmingly, the boys were thrilled to have Tom in their home for such a prolonged period of time and couldn’t resist asking him loads of questions which he answered as best he could even though he was constrained by various contract in what he could say. It wasn’t the first time we’d dined with Louise, Steve and the boys but somehow this felt so much more special. Louise had pulled out all the stops and created a really well thought out three course meal. I always thought she was a better cook than me; she had definitely been more adventurous in her recipe choices than I had ever been but had kept to a more traditional menu for our meal. A light but flavoursome vegetable soup for starters, roast pork with all the trimmings for the main course, which made a nice change from all the turkey we’d been eating and of course Louise had managed crackling to die for and, knowing full well about Tom’s sweet tooth, an unusual but delicious Raspberry Tiramisu for dessert. We spent the entirety of the meal comparing Christmases (though we left out the worst bits of ours!) and it seemed we’d all had a reasonably nice time.

            When the meal was over Louise insisted on the children doing the washing up, whilst the adults went to the front room for coffee. To my surprise the boys were quick to jump up from the table and, to my delight, Lizzie was soon on her feet to help as well with no prompting. Much as when Tom had asked Hems to be his Best Man I was nervous as I contemplated asking Louise to give me away at our wedding. In a complete reversal of that event it was Tom giving me reassuring glances and smiles as I waited for the four of us to be settled so that I could start speaking.

“Louise, you have been my best friend for so long now I know I’m not allowed to tell people how long as it make you feel old!! You have been there for me during my many ups and downs, held me through the bad times and celebrated the good ones with me, and you were actually the first person I told about Tom. I feel I owe you so much and I was wondering if you would do me the honour of giving me away at our wedding?”

Louise looked at me in shock “Jackie, are you sure?” she asked, seemingly oblivious to looks of approval she was getting from both Tom and Steve. “I mean I’m honoured obviously but isn’t there anybody else more deserving?”

I smiled fondly at her “Oh Louise! The only other person I would contemplate is Lizzie and she’s already doing stuff. I really don’t want to walk down the aisle on my own so please say you’ll do it?”

Louise put her head on one side, considering “Well, when you put it like that how can I refuse?! Of course I will give you away and you know I’d only do it if I approved of your choice of man!” We hugged tightly. I was grateful that she’d accepted as I knew I’d never manage that walk on my own.

“Thank you so much Louise, it means so much to me” I gushed as we were joined in our hug by our respective partners. I’m sure that’s because Tom can never resist a hug opportunity and Steve didn’t want to be the odd man out. We broke the hug and Louise then gave Tom her full attention.

“You are a very lucky man Tom, Jackie is a wonderful woman and deserves all the happiness I know you can give her. Woe betide you if I find that’s not the case!”

Tom seemed a little taken aback by the forcefulness of Louise’s words but rallied magnificently and responded humbly.

“I know how lucky I am to have Jackie, and Lizzie, in my life. I’ve already promised them that I will look after them and love them as they deserve but I reiterate that promise to them in front of you. I know you’ve known Jackie for a very long time and probably know her better than anyone else so it means a great deal to me that I have your approval. Thank you very much for agreeing to be a part of our special day.”

“You’re welcome of course Tom” said Louise suddenly business-like “now I assume you will want what I’m wearing to blend in with you gentlemen so what are you wearing? And as I can’t see you having anyone else to speak for you Jackie, do you want a speech as well?”

Tom looked a bit sheepish as he answered for us “Um, well” he started “Jackie has requested black three piece suits with white shirts and French cuffs for the grooms party, but I have no idea what we are doing for ties, cufflinks and handkerchiefs as Jackie refuses to tell me what she wants! As for a speech, if you want to we won’t stop you and I know Jackie would appreciate someone doing the Father of the Bride duties”

“Consider it done” Louise said simply “let me know the specifics of the suits when you have them please Tom, I’m sure they are something all the men will have in their wardrobe but I really don’t want to stick out like a sore thumb. Jackie has my email address so just drop me a line and I’ll get it sorted”

This was one of the things I loved about Louise, her no nonsense approach to things and attention to detail had saved my bacon on more than one occasion when we were younger. And it was Louise I had turned to when Sean and then, later, my parents had passed on. In fact she had pretty much organised Mum and Dad’s funeral for me, prepared to drop everything to help me out when I was unable to cope. I could never pay her back for all the help she’d given me over the years. Tom, however, was just seeing this side of my best friend and I think he was slightly in awe of her directness and organisational skills, though he did his best not to show it.

“Right then” he said “I’ll send you details of the suits, I should be even able to manage a picture!” I smirked at his words; pictures of Tom in a three piece suit were ten a penny on the internet, as he well knew. I managed not to rise to the bait about the men’s ties and accessories, I wanted to keep them a secret and already knew what colour Louise would be in the scheme, a nice bright cerise would go well with the black and the men (except Hems’ scarlet but I couldn’t have everything!) Instead of cufflinks for Louise I was thinking of getting her a pair of earrings, if I could find something suitable, which I was sure I could.

            At that point the children reappeared which prompted Louise to go and check the state of the kitchen and dining room to ascertain that the job had been to her satisfaction. Steve took the chance to thank me for asking his wife to give me away, he knew how much it meant to her to see me happy which led me to believe they discussed me and my life more than I realised. When our hostess returned conversation turned to New Year’s celebration plans and I was very pleased to find out that their family were also going to the Barn Dance, meaning Tom would have somebody there that he knew quite well. We made arrangements to sit together; the first group to arrive snagging a table for the remainder. The evening promised to be even more fun than it normally was now. Soon however it was time for us to depart and we left with promises to get together, even if it was just for coffee at least twice before the wedding. It dawned on me that I would need to emulate Louise’s levels of planning to make sure that everything that had to happen actually took place. The planner on my personal phone resembling the notations of a military operation between now and the end of February.


	116. Chapter 115

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'd like to apologise for my absence last week, that weird annoying thing called RL got in the way and I found myself with no time. I hope you didn't miss me too much and I would like to take this opportunity to thank you all for your continued reading and commenting. you guys make my week :-)

            Our days up until New Year’s Eve were quiet. We sat around or went for long walks across the fields or along the canal, sometimes Lizzie came with us and sometimes she preferred to stay at home. Every time she came out with us she unfailingly refused to wear a coat causing Tom to call her ‘lil Jotunn’ it did take her a couple of times to catch on but it seemed a nickname she really liked. At any rate it didn’t seem to want to make her wear a coat!

            Early evening New Year’s Eve saw us all trying to get ready at the same time, which was interesting to say the least. I’d known what I was wearing since Christmas Day; a Barn Dance seemed the perfect first outing for my new dress. I somehow wasn’t surprised when Tom chose smart dress trousers, a white shirt and a black waistcoat. He couldn’t understand why I rolled my eyes and smiled fondly at him as he showed me the final ensemble, until I said “Tom, Love it’s a village Barn Dance not tea at The Ritz, have you got something slightly more casual?”

He looked at me askance as I continued “Trust me Tom, you go wearing that and you’ll feel so out of place. You advise me what to wear when we go somewhere special, let me return the favour?”

He huffed a bit but ultimately saw the wisdom of my words. He went back upstairs and eventually came down in smart black jeans and a red plaid shirt that was just a little too tight.

“Much better” I said happily “and you shouldn’t get so hot now either, barn dancing can be very energetic and it’s quite a small hall really so the heat will build up rather a lot.”

He took the couple of steps up to me; kissed me reverently and said simply “I bow to your superior knowledge” thought the whole thing was done with a merry twinkle in his eye so I knew he hadn’t taken offence. Lizzie appeared then in a pair of blue jeans and a plain white shirt, teamed with a pair of bright red Converse, she looked really nice in such a simple outfit.

            Tom then realised what I was wearing; having been distracted before by me telling him to go and change. He actually whistled appreciatively as he took in my ensemble. I’d teamed the dress with a pair of low heeled black court shoes as I wanted to dance that night more than I wanted to be closer to Tom’s height and barn dancing in high heels was not conducive to that. The cowboy boots bootlace tie was high at my neck but tucked under the collar of the dress and I felt a million dollars.

“I knew you’d look stunning in that” he said “give us a twirl?” I giggled, having already succumbed to that particular temptation whilst I was alone. I spun quite quickly, knowing how the skirt would flare out and swirl prettily, and would do all night with all the spinning and twirling I intended to do at the dance.

“Beautiful” Tom responded “simply beautiful. I’m going to be the envy of every man there” I had a sneaky feeling that the reverse would be true and that Tom would be the object of quite a lot of attention in the coming few hours. To be totally fair to the inhabitants of the only village I’d ever lived in, those that knew me had been welcoming to Tom when I’d introduced him but we’d hardly paraded him around as such and I knew there would be people there tonight that I only saw once a year and would have little or no idea of the huge changes that had happened in my life since we’d last spoken. I had a feeling we’d be the talk of the village by this time tomorrow.

            When we were ready to leave Tom grabbed his favourite leather jacket, my warmest coat, and arm still in the closet, raised an enquiring eyebrow at Lizzie. To his obvious surprise she asked for her favourite fleece jacket which he handed to her happily. Once we were all warmly wrapped up we headed to my car for the short trip to the Village Hall, we could have walked but the walk home was long enough for a person to get really cold, and, I really didn’t fancy it. Tom drove, even though he’d never been there before so I gave him directions and we made it no problem. The journey was just long enough for Tom to confess that he’d never done anything like this before, apart from a couple of mandatory classes at RADA, the dancing in Cranford being more of a formal affair. I was able to assure him that it wouldn’t be a problem as in all the years I’d been attending the live band provided a very competent caller who took us all through every dance literally step by step. If you could listen and tell your left from your right then you could barn dance. I could see the slight tension lift from Tom’s posture as my words sunk in; I really think that he thought he’d be left to his own devices with everybody else knowing exactly what to do!

            When we got to the Hall I could see Louise’s car was already there so we parked near that. I was really pleased as that meant that a) we had a table and b) we wouldn’t be sitting exposed saving a table waiting for them which would; hopefully give us a little bit of privacy. On entering the building I felt a wave of nostalgia wash over me, so many good memories were tied up in this place, and it hadn’t changed fundamentally in all the years I’d been coming here, the giant clock above the door was even still the same. Tom spotted Louise and Steve before I did and we started over towards them. Almost immediately I was accosted by one of my infrequent friends who, after only brief greetings was totally fixated on my stunning fiancé. I made introductions stressing the word ‘fiancé’ and as I did so Tom’s charming smile seemed to kick up a notch at my possessiveness. I couldn’t help it though; I knew Tom would be a major distraction to at least half the venue tonight and I knew he knew that too. Even people who didn’t find him attractive but knew who he was would wonder what he was doing in our little village. After giving my friend a highly edited version of our courtship, and not mentioning the wedding at all, citing Tom’s busy schedule as a stumbling block to setting a date, we made it to Louise and Steve. Hugs kisses, and handshakes were exchanged as appropriate between the three of us and the six of them, and Steve braved the bar area with one of the boys to get us all drinks. It wasn’t long before the band was on stage, doing a quick tune up and then the first dance was called.

          I wondered if Tom was going to sit the first dance out to get a feel how the evening would go but I should have known better. Before I knew it my hand was in his and he was leading me to the centre of the Hall, his eyes alight with excitement. Louise and Steve decided to join us and together we made half a set, we were soon joined by two other couples all smiling nervously at each other until the caller got our attention. Tom’s demeanour changed completely and he was fully attentive now to what the caller was saying. I knew this dance fairly well; it was a good one to start the night with as the individual steps were simple and the sequence wasn’t hard either, the complication came later in the dance when the couples moving changed until we were all moving at once. We walked through the first part of the dance once, slowly with no music to get a feel for the steps and then the music started and we were off. By the time the third couple had done their ‘solo’ bit Tom had relaxed into the dance and seemed to be fully enjoying himself, if his broad smile was anything to go by. I wasn’t surprised that he’d picked it up so quickly, he’d only made one minor mistake and that was briefly forgetting what pair number he was and starting to move before he should, before catching himself.

            For me some of the fun of a barn dance was watching others try and master the steps, and there were some sets that were in a decidedly worse state when they finished than they were when they started. We’d managed OK which I was pleased about as it meant that Tom wouldn’t be put off and that I could continue my New Year’s tradition. We made our way back to the table at the end of the dance for quick sips of our drinks before the next dance was called and we were up again.

            The whole night was great fun, passing by in a colourful blur, especially when, in dances requiring partners to spin, Tom seemed determined to spin me as fast as he could whilst still keeping me upright! We were even part of the only set to complete a full Strip the Willow with no major disasters. This is quite a complicated dance from the start, involving lots of gentle swirling and partners dancing in the middle of the set line with their partner and then with the members of the set, back to their partner and so on all the way down the set. You really need your wits about you as concentration is key. To my great delight Tom still seemed to be fully enjoying himself, smiling at every female he danced with, and there were all ages in attendance from the under eights to the over eighties. Watching Tom dance gently with a little girl was the highlight of my night, she was in awe of the tall man dancing with her for a small part of one dance. I was convinced she didn’t know who he was, being far too young to be aware of any of his work, but her mum kept giving him a look that clearly said ‘ I know you from somewhere but I really don’t know where’. The little girl got Tom’s courtliest bow of the night and a kiss on the hand at the end of the dance and it was adorable.

            One other thing that made me smile was the larger than usual number of participants for the circle dances. The Village Hall really doesn’t lend itself to these types of dances, being long and thin, and even thinner with tables taking up the dancing space, so the circle dances are generally not popular as it turns into more of a squashed rectangle. On this particular night, however, it gave the largest number of ladies a chance to dance with Tom, even if it was only for thirty seconds or so and they embraced the opportunity whole heartedly. During one of the few dances we didn’t participate in Tom, having fully caught the barn dancing ‘bug’, confided in me that he was having a brilliant time and if I could keep my eyes open for any more similar dances that we might get to he’d be grateful as he’d never seen one advertised in London.

            Than hands on the face of the large orange clock moved slowly towards midnight and the end of the dance but also, of course, the start of a new year. The whole crowd in the room were standing and looking at the clock as we counted down to the end of 2014. There was a television in the separate bar and the volume had been turned up so we could hear Big Ben chime midnight. In a display of affection that I hadn’t been expecting, though probably should have been, Tom started kissing me on the first stroke of the giant bell and didn’t stop until the last one. It was a kiss fit for public consumption of course, not too passionate but full of love and devotion, and everything I’d come to expect, which I responded to in kind. I was dimly aware of other couple kissing around us but we were the last to stop and I know I saw phones being hurriedly put away as we broke. The band also seemed to take it as their cue to strike up with ‘Auld Lang Syne’ and within seconds we were all in two circles, one inside the other to fit everyone in, hands crossed in the traditional manner, bouncing them up and down as we sang the song most of us only knew about half the words to, Tom, with his Scottish heritage, obviously knew them all but happily bumbled along with the rest of us as we sang more choruses than verses as usual.

The end of Auld Lang Syne was also, sadly, the end of the party and we were happy to say fond farewells and ‘see you next years’ to the acquaintances I’d reconnected with as they left and Tom, Lizzie and I stayed to help put all the tables and chairs away. It always seemed churlish to me to go to an event like that, thank the organising committee for all their hard work and then leave them to clear up as well and as we didn’t have to rush back to the cottage for anything staying behind whilst the car park emptied always seemed like a good idea. Tom was engaged in a couple of conversations whilst we collapsed tables and stacked chairs, mainly from people who hadn’t noticed him around but knew who I was as I saw him gesturing towards me at a couple of points. Finally it was all cleared away and after receiving our own thanks from the committee members I led the way to the car and home.


	117. Chapter 116

The next couple of months were the whirlwind I’d been expecting. The first full week of 2015 saw us finalising numbers for the wedding and managing a trip to Eddington Court to check in with Leanne and Kathy and finalise arrangements there. Tom had contacted his cake baking friend and she’d agreed to the cake and cupcakes, promising to start that very day so that the fruit cakes would have a little time to mature. I happily left contact numbers for all our wedding tradespeople with Leanne, confident that she would liaise with them all and make sure our special day was perfect, she was also in charge of finding a celebrant, and also had Luke’s contact details in case of emergency. With that all under control I could relax somewhat and concentrate on getting through the challenges the next few weeks would present. The first of which were the three dinners Tom and I were hosting during the Age of Ultron reshoots. I had changed my mind on my original idea of doing the same meal three times and instead settled down on my sofa with my tried and tested recipes to find appropriate menus. I knew there was a decent supermarket within easy walking distance of Tom’s and was going to use my still relative anonymity to pop out for supplies. Emails were flying back and forth between The Avengers that first week as they all got their shooting schedules and co-ordinated who was coming to us when. It turned out that Robert Downey Jr and Mark Ruffalo would join us on the first weekend, Scarlett Johannsen and Jeremy Renner on the middle weekend and the two Chris’ for the last meal, Hems bringing Elsa and the children with him as he was actually based in London for a good portion of the first part of the year.     

            I worried a bit, as was my usual way, about having the two Chris’ together because it could only cause confusion, but, as was also usual, a few words from Tom was all it took to calm those minor fears.

“It’s simple Darling” he explained “Hemsworth is Hems and I know you already call him that, and Evans is ‘Chrissie’, he’ll answer to it too, not much choice really when Robert adopts it as a nickname!” He made a face as he admitted “every so often he still calls me ‘Reindeer Games’ you know?”

I giggled “No I didn’t know that, tell me, how much is Robert like Stark?”

Tom shook his head ruefully “Apart from the drinking? Far too much! Robert is teetotal and has been for a very long time. You are kindred spirits in that respect, but he’s as mischievous and cheeky as anything and there is never a dull moment, Stark is basically Robert with all the knobs turned up to eleven! Mark on the other hand is quite different to Bruce, he’s a wonderful family man and I’m sure you’ll get on really well with him, well with all of them really”

“OK” I said with false cheerfulness as I reserved judgement on Tom’s declaration. I liked to think I was a good judge of character and preferred to make my own decisions on if I liked people or not, though I knew that Tom had no doubts about what he was saying “can you do me a favour and double check any food allergies or intolerances please? I think I’m the cause of enough interrupted filming this year to want to be the cause of anymore!”

Tom chucked at my statement. We both knew it was true that at least three major shoots had an enforced week off due to our nuptials, the stars in question having enough clout to be able to demand the time off for a friend’s wedding. “Consider it done” Tom said as he flashed up his computer to compose yet another email. Luckily for my sanity it transpired that nobody has any major food issues when the responses came back so planning menus was relatively simple.

            Logistically it made the most sense for Tom to move back to his apartment for the duration of the reshoots so we all travelled up to London after Lizzie had finished school on the Friday before reshoots started. With Robert and Mark due the next evening when we were back at Tom’s I busied myself trotting to the shops whilst he dug around in the freezer for something we could have for tea. I‘d decided on simple fare for the meals. I knew that our guests would be tired from trying to fit so much into such a short space of time so easy to eat food seemed to be the order of the day. To that end I’d decided to cook my successful menu for Rodney and Claudia again for Robert and Mark, keeping everything low fat and healthy for my guests, again substituting raspberries for the more traditional strawberries in the Eton mess. Luckily Tom’s local supermarket kept a good selection of fresh fruit and vegetables and all my ingredients were easily found.

            When I got back to the apartment Tom hadn’t managed to find much for tea and was busy improvising away in the kitchen with whatever he could find. The resulting pasta with tuna and tomato sauce was very filling and tasty and finished to perfection with mounds of grated cheese on top that melted quickly over the hot sauce and pasta making a gorgeous stringy mess. An added bonus was that by using macaroni as the pasta it had all been done in one saucepan, the sauce being kept at a simmer until the pasta had cooked making clear up easy too which was good because it was quite late enough in the evening when I finally got to make the meringues for the Eton mess. Being out of time for long slow cooking as I’d done in Shreveport I settled for shorter cooking but cooling in the oven once cooked which should give a nice chewy on the inside, crunchy on the outside texture. I also made a raspberry coulis to drizzle over the finished desserts the next evening. Tired but happy we turned in for the night.

            The next day saw us preparing for that evening. Tom and Lizzie were in charge of cleaning and entertainment whilst I concentrated on cooking, the galley kitchen in the apartment being really only suited to one chef at a time. All preparations were completed slightly ahead of schedule to our great surprise and we got changed and ready for our guests.

            Robert and Mark were sharing a taxi and bang on time the intercom buzzed. Tom pressed the answer button and the familiar tones of Tony Stark came through the speaker “This the best you got Reindeer Games? Boy have you come down in the world! Ow!” the last was a surprise but was a result of Mark elbowing in the ribs, trying to get him to behave. Tom had turned to me as Robert started speaking, a sheepish smile on his lips for hearing his nickname again whilst simultaneously rolling his eyes at Robert’s antics. Addressing his reply to the intercom he said “Be right down” in his normal voice and disappeared out of the door. I had wondered if Tom would slip into Loki and I was gratified that he resisted the temptation. I was still holding out hope for a nice evening and Loki and Stark sniping at each other, even in fun, wasn’t exactly what I had in mind, there would be plenty of time for that sort of shenanigans the week of the wedding. These meals were meant to be a means for me to meet Tom’s friends and get to know them, not their characters.

            Tom was soon re-entering the apartment with Robert and Mark following close behind and it was time for re-introductions. I had met them both before at out second engagement party and had danced with both of them then but it wasn’t really a time conducive to getting to know one another when one person is still trying to process the fact they have been engaged for 24 hours! The formalities over we sat around on the huge sofa, catching up in Tom’s case, learning about in mine on the respective families were doing. Robert was married to Susan and they had two children under five, in fact their newest arrival had only been born in November, with Robert joking that he had come to London for a rest from the sleepless nights! Mark was also married to a woman with the intriguing name of Sunshine, and they had three older children, a teen and two between ten and five and they were all coming to the wedding. I was particularly looking forward to meeting the wives and partners, the more insights I could get into what it was like to be married to a Hollywood start the better as far as I was concerned, though that would have to wait until the meet and greet where I was determined to make time to get to know them all. I wasn’t sure how many more Marvel films Tom had left to do but it seemed the friendships he had already forged would last longer than filming anyway.

            Both Mark and Robert made an effort to include Lizzie in the conversations, made easier for Mark as his eldest wasn’t that much younger than Lizzie, but Robert was trying hard. There was a fair amount of teasing too, gentle ribbing about other projects they had been working on separately. The meal was a great success, all the men enthusing over the food (though Tom knew better than to criticise) even going as far as to ask for the recipe. The pudding seemed to go down particularly well, it being something our guests had never had before. To my surprise Robert and Mark insisted on helping clear up after we’d finished eating, not letting me help at all and I was relegated to leaning against the kitchen door frame watching them try and navigate three bodies in Tom’s small kitchen.

            All in all the evening was a great success with my guests promising to sing my culinary praises to the rest of the cast, so no pressure for the next two weekends there then! We also managed to get travel arrangements for the wedding sorted and I only snorted a little bit when I realised that the Downey’s and the Ruffalo's were both landing on the same day, my mind unerringly going back to my giggle fit in Shreveport. I could tell from Tom’s expression that he remembered a well but forbore to say anything.

            It seemed strange to head home without Tom on the Sunday evening but he had prep for The Night Manager to complete as well as being around for the reshoots. He was actually shadowing a real hotel night manager for a couple of nights just to see what their job entails and pick up some tips, so he would be sleeping during the day for a couple of days in the coming week. I was really pleased that he’d managed to arrange it for when he was already in London as it didn’t then eat into our precious time together, and that it didn’t totally clash with when he was needed by Marvel. I rang him when I was safely ensconced in my little cottage again just to let him know we were home safe and took myself off to bed.


	118. Chapter 117

            I used one of my free days that week to pick up the cufflinks for the wedding as they were finished, the jewellers also managed to find me a pair of earrings for Louise. I happily paid for them and all the gifts were boxed up neatly. I thanked the staff profusely for their time and efforts, knowing that I would use them again without hesitation. My next port of call was my dress maker, Hazel, for a fitting. I showed her the cufflinks for the boys as I was so excited to have them, knowing they were unique, and also Louise’s earrings. On seeing the gifts she got very animated and rushed around her fabrics, coming back with a perfectly matching fabric for each set, emerald for Tom, scarlet for Chris, amethyst for Benedict and a beautiful pale blue for Martin, which she assured me she could turn into a tie and handkerchief for everyone, for a very small charge. She told me about a new idea where florists wire was sewn into one side of the handkerchief so that it would keep its shape however it was folded. I thought it was a brilliant idea, though I had no idea how it would work practically on the day. I had no clue as to the origami skills of any of the groom’s party and I certainly couldn’t fold for them as I couldn’t see Tom before the wedding. I decided I would worry about it nearer the time and went with the plan anyway.

            My dress was coming along beautifully; the skirt was already completed with the hidden pleats working wonderfully. Every now and then I couldn’t help but twirl in it, delighted by how the fabric swirled and flowed as I spun. It was now the question of shoes came up and once again I was flummoxed, all I knew was that I didn’t want our height difference to look too big in the photos, and I definitely needed to look taller than Lizzie so high heels were essential for the ceremony, but I also knew I wanted to dance and I couldn’t in heels. The answer to my dilemma was obvious but also seemed extravagant. Two pairs of shoes that I would only wear once seemed a great waste of money but I also knew I would be miserable if my feet weren’t comfortable. That final fact decided it for me really, I never thought I’d get married again and the prospect of not being able to enjoy myself fully was not one I felt like contemplating so two pairs of shoes it would be.

            Hazel stocked all styles and colours of wedding shoes and we soon found two pairs whose colour matched both each other and my dress. The height difference in the respective heels wasn’t huge, enough for the photos to look good but not enough that the hem of the dress would look silly, all in all it was the perfect solution. It also meant that I had shoes to practice dancing in that wouldn’t be worn for the ceremony so; technically, Tom wouldn’t see any of my wedding outfit. I left Hazel’s that day with two pairs of shoes and a list of appointments for fittings for myself and for Lizzie of course all the way to the week of the wedding itself, Hazel explaining that for the perfect fit the bodice of the dress wouldn’t be completed until practically the last minute. I had decided against a veil, to my mind they were cumbersome, got in the way, and actually in this case would not enhance the style of the dress. Hazel wholeheartedly agreed with me so I was pleased that I’d made a little less work for her. The rest of the time I concentrated on my cross-stitch.

            I had a lovely day at my local craft superstore buying all the fabric, thread and embellishments needed to complete my first commission. I’d finally got the design pulled together and was really pleased how it had turned out, an intricate looking lace border surrounding a stitched rendition of the church the wedding was happening in and all the personal details worked in the bride’s colours. She was having cream and lavender as her colours so I got to use lots of lovely shades of purple. I’d even found some interlocking gold rings that would represent the wedding bands. I managed to actually get some stitches onto the fabric by the time Friday came around and then it was time to go to Tom’s again for another meal with some of the Avengers.

            The weekly trip to London passed without incident. I was getting much better at driving in the city now and before long Lizzie and I were pulling up outside Tom’s, unusually he wasn’t waiting for us in the lobby even though I’d texted him an estimated time of arrival about half an hour away from his. Moaning under my breath about having to unload the car ourselves Lizzie and I took the lift to the top floor, there was still no sign of Tom so I used my key to let us into his flat. I spotted him immediately, sitting with his back to the front door, totally engrossed in a script, his glasses perched on top of his head and a there was a part finished cup of tea on the table in front of him, standing witness to how deeply he was into the story he was reading.

“Hello Love” I said trying to get his attention, but got nothing in return. Dumping my bags by the door I walked around so I was facing him and tried again. The result this time was instantaneous, Tom leapt up in a flurry of long limbs and paper, his face one of shock.

“Darling” he exclaimed “I didn’t hear you come in. What time is it?” Recovering his composure rapidly, though the look of shock on his face changed to one of consternation when he realised how late it was.

“Darling, I’m so sorry. I intended to have a meal ready for you after your drive but I got a bit distracted by a script”

“I can tell Love” I replied softly “it’s no problem. I know you’ve had a weird week”

“Hmm. You can say that again” Tom responded “I was so discombobulated after two night shifts at the hotel it took me two days to work out where in the week I was again! Anyway, how are you? Did you have a good week?”

“We’re fine thank you” I smiled “and my week was very productive I got some stuff sorted and managed to finally start sewing that sampler”

“Good, good” Tom said, still slightly distracted “Hello Lizzie” he continued as he spotted her.

“Hello Tom. How are you? Lizzie said politely, though the grin on her face told me that she knew that Tom was anything but fine.

“Confused” said Tom honestly “I have no idea where the time had gone today”

Lizzie eyed the half-drunk cup of tea “Maybe you’d do better after a coffee” she said making her way towards the kitchen, so at home in Tom’s apartment that it was second nature for her to make us a hot drink as soon as we arrived.

Come here you!” I said as soon as Lizzie was in the kitchen “I need a big hug as I haven’t had one all week!” Tom stepped towards me, happy to oblige as usual. I sighed contentedly as he pulled me into his chest, inhaling and enjoying the smell that was uniquely him. I liked his smell so much I occasionally used his toiletries rather than mine and, much to my amusement, he hadn’t seemed to notice yet.

“I really am sorry Darling” he murmured into my hair as we enjoyed our embrace “I did mean to have a meal ready for you”

“I know you did” I replied “you are forgiven; it’s just one of those things. It’s not too late to cook now is it? I don’t need the kitchen this evening.”

“No, it’s not” he said happily “and that’s just another reason I love you so much, some people would have been very upset with me if they found out I hadn’t done something I *thought* I would. Not you though, you just look for solutions”

I finally pulled out of the hug to look him square in the eye “And what would be the point of getting upset?” I queried “what exactly is achieved by being in a mood just because somebody didn’t do something only they knew they *might* do? I appreciate the thought but it’s not the end of the world is it now?”

That earned me another heartfelt kiss, just as Lizzie reappeared with the drinks. I took a cautious sip, really needing the caffeine but mindful of burning my tongue. As usual the first sip tasted like nectar and I cradled my mug in my hands as I followed Tom to the kitchen so that he could cook. Seeming to carry on the theme of his week he cooked a succulent smoked fish kedgeree, explaining that it was an Indian breakfast dish of spiced rice, fish and boiled eggs, it was delicious and even Lizzie enjoyed it.

            We spent what was left of the evening regaling each other with the tales of our weeks. I had to be quite circumspect with mine for obvious reasons but if Tom noticed, he didn’t comment.


	119. Chapter 118

The next day was spent getting ready for that evening’s guests, Scarlett and Jeremy this weekend. I was cooking a traditional Lancashire hotpot, a one pot dish that required long and slow cooking resulting in meat that fell apart as soon as a fork came anywhere near it and tender root vegetables all topped with crispy potato slices. I had decided that warm apple cake and custard would go well with the main dish, proper comfort food for a cold January day. I trotted to the supermarket after breakfast and found some nice lean lamb and fresh vegetables for the hotpot, and some lovely looking cooking apples for the cake. I was slower going back to the apartment, laden down as I was with the ingredients for that night’s repast. Tom and Lizzie had already cleaned the kitchen and were working on the rest of the rooms as Tom hadn’t quite managed to keep everything up together in the previous days.

            I concentrated on making the cake first, the idea being that it would only need to go back in the oven to warm instead of cook whilst we ate the hotpot. I was thoroughly enjoying flexing my cooking muscles again, it had been too easy when it was only Lizzie and I just to do something processed from the freezer and be done with it. Cooking for Tom however had re-awakened my love of cooking and baking, it helped that I had an appreciative audience of course but Tom hadn’t complained about anything I’d created for him so far except to bemoan the fact that he wasn’t allowed more of it!

            Inevitably, as I mixed the thick cinnamon flavoured batter, adding the diced apple and sultanas my two ‘little helpers’ came to investigate. Well they *told* me that they wanted to know if I wanted a hot drink, but I knew better, they were both after tasting the raw cake batter. I knew Lizzie’s tricks of old of course and I wasn’t really surprised to find she had a willing accomplice in her stepfather-to-be. I don’t think I could have found anyone better suited to be a father figure for her if I’d tried. For all the differences in upbringing and opportunities they were remarkably alike quite often, mainly in regard to me as they had proved on more than one occasion and I knew that both of them were happy that the other one would look out for me in their absence. There was no jealousy between them, they both knew how much I loved them and that I would do anything for either of them if asked.

            I gave in to their not so subtle pleading expressions by giving them a spoon each and letting them both dip into the mixture once only. The looks of delight spreading across their faces the only valediction I needed that the cake would turn out fine. I shooed them out again after they had licked their spoons clean, promising to leave a bit of excess batter in the bowl for them to share when I was ready. Mollified they did as they were told and once the batter was in the tin I kept my promise and took the bowl into the main room. Making sure they knew they had to return it to the kitchen once it was ‘clean’ I headed back to start preparing the hotpot. The secret is long slow cooking I usually did about three hours on a low heat and had never gone wrong yet. I peeled and chopped carrots, parsnips and swede into bite sized chunks before roughly chopping an onion and frying it and the cubed lamb to seal the meat. Once that was done I put it in a casserole dish with the chopped vegetables. Some fresh rosemary sprigs and a load of stock. I also added some pearl barley to soak up some of the sauce. The final step was to slice peeled potatoes and arrange them attractively over the meat and sauce. Covering the pot with its lid I put it in the oven and promptly forgot about it. The only thing I had to do now was to make some custard to go with the cake, prepare some greens and remember to remove the casserole lid half an hour before serving the dish so the potatoes could crisp up.

            I quickly washed up all the dirty utensils and dishes and popped the kettle on as the aforementioned hot drink offered by Tom and Lizzie had failed to materialise as soon as they had gotten their hands on the cake batter. Ignoring their chastened faces as I asked them if they wanted a drink I took their requests and made them. There was still plenty of time before we were expecting our guests and I was determined to sit down and just relax for a bit. I snuggled next to Tom on the sofa and smiled as he automatically draped an arm around me, pulling me in for a brief kiss on the top of my head as an apology for the lack of a coffee earlier. He also took the time to fill me in on our guests. Scarlett was married with a very young daughter and Jeremy was single. Much like their characters they were playing again for the next week, Jeremy and Scarlett were good friends off set as well as on and it was actually Scarlett that had suggested this particular pairing. Remembering how she had made Lizzie feel part of the family the only time we met I could totally see her doing that. The Avengers cast did seem to be more of a family than I’d expected no real parental figures though; just a large number of siblings and the family vibe was happily extended to partners and children too. In fact our wedding was the first time the extended family had been together for a year so I was very pleased that they could all have quality time together.

            We all had a quick freshen up before Scarlett and Jeremy arrived and reconvened in the main room with minutes to spare. I used the time to check on the hotpot, taking off the tinfoil lid to crisp up the potatoes, knowing I could always replace it if the initial conversation took longer than expected. Our guests were bang on time, Tom once more the dutiful host went down to the lobby to escort them to the apartment and before long I was being hugged by Scarlett who then wasted no time remaking her acquaintance with Lizzie, much to their mutual delight. I thought back to our London engagement party and Tom’s comment about Scarlett being one of the ‘good guys’ and was pleased that still seemed to ring true. Then I was on the receiving end of a hug and kiss on the cheek from Jeremy. We had only spoken very briefly the last time we met and I was actually looking forward to getting to know him.

            I had done my homework and looked everybody up on IMDb but to my chagrin I had only seen Jeremy as Hawkeye, most of his other work not being my cup of tea. It was a shame as it gave me one less topic of conversation to call on but I was fairly sure I would manage. Soon it was time to eat and I tentatively put the hotpot on the table. I’d done some green vegetables to go with it and it seemed to be a good idea as our guests helped themselves enthusiastically to the simple fare on offer. Conversation that had been flowing freely soon dried up as everyone concentrated on the food before them, leaving me feeling very happy that it tasted good enough to stop people talking. Jeremy was the first to break the silence “Robert and Mark weren’t joking, this is really lovely Jackie. Thank you so much for this.”

“You’re both welcome” I responded “It really was no bother” I could, however, feel my cheeks getting hot as a familiar blush started and from the fond smile on Tom’s face he’d noticed one of his favourite things about me as well, and then set about making it worse!

“Jackie really is brilliant in the kitchen” he said “I can honestly say I haven’t had anything I’ve disliked yet, and I’ve learnt if Jackie recommends an ‘odd’ combination it generally works!” to elaborate on his point he recounted the story of the first time he tried my sugar and vinegar salad dressing. To save my cheeks from getting hot enough to actually cook on, and seeing everyone had finished their hotpot I excused myself to the kitchen to make the custard for the apple cake. At Lizzie’s insistence I also got some vanilla ice-cream out of the freezer for those who preferred hot and cold together. Before I re-entered the main room I patted my cheeks with cold kitchen towel in an effort to cool them down. Having regained my composure somewhat I placed everything I needed on a tray and took it through. Tom stood to help me as soon as he saw me and took the tray to place on the table.

            Apparently Scarlett and Jeremy had never had warm cake as pudding before so I knew they were in for another treat. As no one could make up their minds whether to have ice cream or custard I quickly decided that two smaller pieces each served with just one accompaniment was the way to go and as I rose to get more bowls from the kitchen silently thanked whichever deity was responsible for dishwashers! My solution was greeted with great enthusiasm and soon we were all indulging in the delicious combinations of flavours in our bowls. During our postprandial coffee taken on the sofa Tom, Scarlett and Jeremy discussed how the reshoots were going. Jeremy had actually finished with his bit now and was heading home two days later, Scarlett had a couple of more bits to do and all of Tom’s stuff would be done the following week. Shop talk done Tom disappeared briefly into our bedroom and returned with his guitar, Lizzie’s eyes lit up immediately and she scurried off to her bedroom to get her own instrument. The consequence was that we had a lovely evening singing and playing together, it turned out that Jeremy could play the guitar as well so we had plenty of players and Scarlett and I were content enough to sing the ones we knew and try to pick up the ones we didn’t. As ways to get to know actors and not their characters these evenings were working really well and I honestly felt at the end of the night that I knew more about our guests than I could have gleaned from IMDb or, heaven help us Wiki! Scarlett and Jeremy were generous with their thanks as they departed and we wished Jeremy safe travelling and expressed our anticipation at seeing him again in a few short weeks. Tom knew he was going to see Scarlett on set at some point so their farewell was more circumspect.


	120. Chapter 119

            When we had the place to ourselves again I heaved a huge sigh of relief and flopped back onto the sofa. I was still there when Tom reappeared from saying goodbye to Scarlett and Jeremy. He took one look at me and promptly took charge, the dining table was cleared in record time and the dishwasher loaded with as much as was practical. When I made a move to help him he fixed me with a very stern look and said simply “You’ve done enough, stay there, relax and I’ll be with you shortly.” Indeed it seemed no time at all until he was standing before me with a steaming mug of hot chocolate. I took it gratefully and as I sniffed at it appreciatively I realised that he’d made it by my preferred method of melting solid chocolate into milk instead of using the more normal powder. Careful not to jostle me he sat down at my side and said “Right, no arguments, once you have drunk that you are off to bed. I can tell you are shattered and you can lie in as long as you need to tomorrow, we have no plans.”

            Looking at him I knew that he was right, as much fun as these dinners were I was doing them practically by myself. I also knew from the look on his face that the statement about arguing was correct too. He was in no mood to back down, he wanted to take care of me and make me feel loved beyond all doubt and I really wasn’t in the mood to cross him. I did savour the hot chocolate though, it was absolutely delicious. As soon as I’d put the empty cup on the coffee table Tom was standing again holding out his hands in an unmistakeable invitation which I accepted.

            It was still relatively early for a weekend bedtime so as we made our way to our bedroom we detoured to Lizzie’s where she had gone after helping Tom. I poked my head around the door to say goodnight and just caught the brief nod she gave Tom as she returned my sentiment. I knew then that they were plotting again but thoughts of my bed were chasing all others out of my head. I was feeling sleepier by the minute, a combination I suppose of Tom’s suggestion and the hot chocolate which was always a precursor to a good night’s sleep. I just about managed to stay awake through getting undressed and slipping on my pyjamas and I needed no encouragement to clamber into bed as soon as Tom moved the quilt. I snuggled down and the last thing I remember hearing was Tom’s chuckle and him saying he would be in soon.

            The next morning I slept undisturbed for ages. I honestly hadn’t realised how tired I was until I was allowed to sleep without censure. When I finally surfaced complete with tousled hair and sleep encrusted eyes to greet the world and made it to the front room I was more than a little surprised that the first thing I spotted was an impeccably suited Tom, I knew we had nothing on that day so why was he dressed so smartly? On spotting me he covered the short distance between us and pulled me in for a good morning kiss.

“Good morning Darling” he said happily “did you sleep well?”

“Yes, thank you. Um why are you dressed like that? Have I forgotten something we’re meant to be doing?”

He smiled the fond smile he reserved just for me. “No need to worry Darling, the reasons I look like this are twofold. First” he held up one finger “Lizzie and I have decided that you get a whole day off today. You get to sit and be indulged as a thank you for all you do for both of us. And secondly” he held up a second finger “I can use the excuse of pampering you to perfect Jonathan Pine, well one aspect of him anyway. If you don’t mind?”

“Of course I don’t mind Love. If it helps your performance I will be flattered. As for the pampering we will see how that goes I suppose” and I cheekily stuck my tongue out at him. I was curious to see what they had come up with; ‘My Pair’ as I’d taken to calling Lizzie and Tom in the privacy of my own thoughts. With that he ducked in to the bedroom to grab my dressing gown and held it out to help me put it on. He then escorted me courteously to the dining table where a single place had been set. “Lizzie and I have already eaten” he explained “and technically you are having brunch as it is too late for breakfast.” Lizzie than appeared from the kitchen with a plate balanced carefully on one hand, obviously having decided to play along with Tom’s attempt to be a night manager for the day.    

            Tom took the plate and placed it in front of me to reveal a bacon and cheese omelette, cooked to perfection and served beautifully. A glass of apple juice completed this part of my repast and then there were coffee and toasted English muffins to follow. When I was full Tom and Lizzie cleared the table and washed up whilst I went and had a quick wash and got dressed in jeans and a pretty blouse. On re-entering the main room I was met once again by Tom who escorted me to the sofa and presented me with the remote controls for the telly and cable box. He also produced from somewhere a footstool of all things and insisted I literally put my feet up. True to their word I didn’t lift a finger all day, and my every whim was catered for. I just about resisted the temptation to ask them for something really outlandish just to see what they would do but it was a very close run thing. I had never been spoilt quite like that before and there was a very small part of me that wouldn’t object if ‘My Pair’ wanted to do this more often.

            Tom stayed in character pretty much all day and it was fascinating to see the differences in him. His demeanour was the main change of course, more deferential, and subservient without straying into obsequious and smarmy, just what you would want from somebody who you would only see in a hotel if you had a problem late at night, cool unflappable and totally efficient. His actions too were more restrained; Tom loves to talk with his hands but this would be completely inappropriate for Jonathan so he had to practice reining it in, subtle hand gestures instead of expansive ones and no random touching. I’m sure he found that hardest of all considering I was the one he was practicing in front of.We were almost always granting each other brief touches, the brush of hands, a gentle fingertip caress down an arm or a cheek, we were both tactile people and it showed in our relationship. I had heard friends, and Tom’s family mention in earshot but not to us directly that that’s how they knew how in love we were; the near constant contact between us.

            The lengths he went to, to get Pine right were amazing, we normally made our drinks in mugs but for that one day we used cups and saucers and a tea service when we drank tea and a coffee pot I didn’t know existed, when we had coffee with Tom playing ‘mother’. It was a surreal but fun day and seemed to work well for him. Lizzie was in charge of the evening meal and had managed to create wonderful chicken, mushroom and bacon pies served with plenty of fresh green vegetables.

            Tom stopped practicing straight after the meal and as soon as the table was cleared he went and got changed out of his suit and tie and into more comfortable T-shirt and jogging bottoms. “How did I do?” he asked

“Well I had a wonderful day” I responded “I haven’t felt quite so superfluous in a long time so you have the spoiling me thing down pat. It was a bit weird though seeing Tom being Jonathan, if you see what I mean? But I guess if I could tell you were acting differently it worked”

Tom looked very pleased with my critique “You really could notice a difference?” he asked.

“Oh absolutely” I replied “your movements especially, your hands were much more restrained than usual and your voice was slightly ‘wrong’ too, but in a good way”

“Why thank you Darling” he said warmly and that was when I realised that he hadn’t called me that since he slipped into Jonathan’s character and as that thought percolated I knew that I’d really missed it. We sat snuggling on the sofa for a while longer until I very reluctantly made to stand up.

“I wish you didn’t have to go” Tom said sadly

“I know. I wish I didn’t have to either but it’s only a few more days and then things will be back to normal, well if anything connected with your life at work can be considered ‘normal’” I responded with a slight smile to take any potential sting out of my words.

“That’s true” he said slightly happier after my words “just a few short days and they will fly by. I have my reshoot stuff tomorrow and Tuesday and then we will see what the rest of the week will bring”

Whist we were speaking I’d gathered my belongings, and my daughter and we were ready to leave. It was later than I wanted but at least I didn’t have to cook when I got back. We walked together to the lift and rode to the lobby, out of the door and to the carpark where Tom gave me a lovely kiss goodbye. “Ring me when you get home?” he said softly.

“I will” I assured him “but we won’t chat long, I know you have an early call tomorrow”

My gorgeous man smiled at me “I’ll be fine I’ve had earlier calls!”

“I’m sure you have, but I don’t want to be the cause of a less than stellar performance from you just because I couldn’t put a phone down!”

“I appreciate the sentiment Darling, now off you go, the later you go the later I’ll be up waiting” the mischievousness in his expression was a joy to behold. I took the not so subtle hint, got in the car, blew Tom a kiss and set off back to Wiltshire. True to my word I phoned him when I got home, made sure we only spoke briefly and went to bed myself.


	121. Chapter 120

            Before I knew it the next week, we were already halfway through. Monday and Tuesday had passed in a flurry of activity, grocery shopping, menu planning for the Chris’ and plenty of cross stitch. In fact I was happily sewing away in my favourite chair mid Wednesday morning when I heard a key in the front door. Thinking Lizzie had been sent home from school for some reason and wondering why I hadn’t been informed I put down my project and stood up to turn towards the door. I was utterly gobsmacked to see Tom walk through the door, overnight bag on one shoulder. The smile that had been plastered on his face dropped as soon as he saw my shocked expression but I managed to start speaking first.

“Tom? Love what are you doing here? I wasn’t expecting to see you until Friday in London!”

“But Darling, I’m here for our dance lesson, did you forget?”

“No” I replied honestly “I can’t forget something I didn’t know about”

Tom frowned then “I put it on my phone planner, I’m sure I did! It should have synced with your ‘star phone’. Did you not get a notification?”

“Ah” I started suddenly feeling really guilty, I knew what had happened now “I may not have checked that phone for a while. You’ve been around so I didn’t see the need. Sorry. Are you really cross?” my voice had been getting smaller as I got through the sentence until I was virtually whispering at the end. I felt so silly but my logic made sense in my head.

Tom dropped his bag and quickly closed the distance between us, pulling me into a huge hug and kissing the top of my head as was his way “Oh Silly Goose!” he said fondly “I’m not cross, disappointed maybe, but not cross. No harm has been done, you were here when I got here so I don’t have to wonder where you are and if you’ll be back in time, and the studio isn’t booked until this afternoon anyway. Just promise me one thing?”

“If I can” I vowed

With a small smile on his face he said “If I have to get better at putting appointments on my calendar can you at least try and look at it occasionally?”

I actually giggled then, remembering the time in Luke’s office when Tom had promised that he would try harder to keep his commitments up to date on his phone and Luke and I had looked at him sceptically. He was right of course, he had gotten everything we were doing together on his calendar as well as the stuff he was doing ‘solo’. I noticed dancing lessons every week up until the wedding and just hoped it would be long enough to perfect whatever Tom had planned. Having put my ‘star phone’ on to charge as I realised that it was also dangerously low in battery I turned to Tom and said “Well now what?”

“Now” he said “I’m dying for a cup of tea and then I’ll unpack my bag” he sauntered to the kitchen to put the kettle on and prepare the mugs. That job done he was back to me quickly and bopping me on the nose. Still in a jovial mood he said “You’ll have to learn to keep up Darling, sometimes I can be busier when I’m not filming than when I am, especially if I’m on a promo tour”

“I will” I promised, thinking how much I’d hate to get caught out like that again “so if you don’t mind me asking” I said trying to change the subject “why the overnight bag?”

Tom sighed “If you looked at the planner occasionally Darling you would see that I have nothing on for the next three days. Reshoots are done for me and neither Luke nor Malcolm had anything they needed me to do so I came home”

Thoroughly chided I apologised “I’m really sorry Tom, sorry that you didn’t get a better greeting today, and sorry I’m so bad at this”

Within milliseconds I was in his arms again “Now, now Darling, that’s quite enough of that” he said softly “As I said no harm has been done so as far as I’m concerned we can draw a line under this and move on. OK? Goodness if that’s the worst we ever have to deal with we will have a very long and happy life together”

            Well I wasn’t going to jeopardise our future happiness for anything so I stopped apologising and moved to make the tea. Drinks in hand we moved to the sofa but not before I went to put my sewing away properly; I was stitching on a very pale evenweave that would show all the dirt and be a devil to clean and dry so I was intent on minimising the risk to its cleanliness. Tom however had other ideas and soon I found myself explaining the intricacies of cross stitch to him. He seemed fascinated by the process of turning coloured squares on graph paper into a picture, especially when I explained that it was quite easy on this particular type of fabric to make very small stitches to add shaping which I had done before to great effect. His curiosity sated for now I put my project away and sat down next to Tom on the sofa. My sewing chair was a large armchair with a standard lamp behind it with a special daylight bulb installed, to give the best possible light for sewing, whatever the weather outside. I could see Tom taking careful note of all these arrangements and I wondered what was going on in that handsome head of his.

            We drank our tea whilst we spoke, catching up on our respective weeks so far and looking forward to catching up with Hems and his family the coming weekend. Tom, of course, was already up to speed but he confessed he hadn’t seen much of ‘Chrissie’ in the two days he was on set and was looking forward to doing so.

            We had an early light lunch of sandwiches and fruit, cleared away and then it was time to jump in the Jag, for a change, and head to the dance studio Tom had booked. I made sure to leave a note for Lizzie, not wanting her to worry if she got home to find my car there but no sign of me! The dance studio turned out to be less than ten minutes away in a large old house at the other end of the village that had been turned into a Hotel and Health Club. It wasn’t a very swanky place but, as Tom said, we only needed space to practice in and this was nice and local.

            We walked into Reception and Tom introduced us to the receptionist, explaining why we were there. Another member of staff was summoned and we were shown to the dance studio. It wasn’t intimidating in the slightest when I realised that one entire wall was mirrors and I would be able to see how badly I was performing. I instinctively squeezed Tom’s hand and he reciprocated. I really hoped he understood my hesitation. I knew he was a good freestyle dancer and I suspected that when we tried a more formal style he’d be really graceful too. I however didn’t think I would be and was worried I was going to mess this up big style. After a quick walkthrough of the sound system the employee left us to our own devices. Tom was very quick to take me in his arms and ask what was wrong. Helplessly I indicated the intimidated wall of mirrors and said “I think this is going to be a disaster, I mean look at you. You’re tall, elegant, graceful, handsome, talented, can turn your hand to anything, and be charming to people even when you don’t like them. And here I am...” and he cut me off with “gorgeous, generous, calm, smart, a fantastic mother and most importantly of all, the woman I am going to spend the rest of my life with. Now if the mirrors bother you so much we can cover them up, and then we will see where we need to tweak your technique.” He looked into my eyes and I could see the conviction in his. I sincerely hoped he was a good teacher because I had never done anything like this before, barn dancing was one thing, there were set steps and directions but from what I knew of ballroom dancing the man was meant to lead and I had no idea how I would know where Tom wanted me to go. Add in the fact that I would, as far as I could tell, spend the majority of the dance going backwards and to me my insecurity was totally justified.

            Tom moved to the control panel and with a whirr of motors curtains covered the mirrors. “Better?” he asked returning to my side

“A little” I conceded.

“I’m sure you’ll feel even better once we get going” he said softly. He took a small remote control out of his pocket and pressed a button on it. Immediately music started playing, not too loud but easy to hear. I did recognise the classical piece and was actually surprised that it wasn’t ‘our song’.

            Seeing my reaction Tom smiled and said gently “I thought we’d start with a basic waltz and when you are confident we can work out steps to ‘Eternal Flame’. Do you trust me?”

I found myself nodding in answer to his question but felt the need to verbalise a response too. “I do trust you Tom, implicitly”

“Then you know that I would never put you in a situation that I know you will find uncomfortable without as much preparation as I can manage, whether it’s me personally or Luke or anyone else. It means the world to me that you are prepared to be mine in public but I know there will be situations you may not be comfortable with if you were thrown in at the deep end. So we will prepare, especially if you have reservations; like about dancing our first dance for example. OK?” And he smiled encouragingly.

            It made all the difference to me to hear him emphatically put paid to worries I hadn’t even managed to vocalise. I was struck, as I often was how kind and generous he was in so many things, he thought of problems even I hadn’t yet and found ways for me to cope. I tried not to think about it too often but it was scary, stepping over the fandom line. I’d admired and, yes, even fantasised about Tom for a couple of years before I met him but never did I think that my fantasies would come true and now they had. I knew I would have to deal with the repercussions; long periods apart when he was filming would be hard but fine, they were the price I had to pay for loving him and being loved so whole heartedly in return. The fans were slightly scarier; judging from all the post at Christmas mostly benign but very enthusiastic, but public appearances on Tom’s arm were right at the top of the ‘Jackie Scare List’ I knew my appearance would be dissected by everyone from fashion journalists and stylists to the fans who couldn’t contemplate Tom being with anyone but them! Knowing Tom would help in any way he could was a huge fillip and boost to my confidence.

            Talking of the man of the moment he came back to me from fiddling with the sound system and said simply “Ready?”

“Yes” I said

“Right, well I know you watch Strictly Come Dancing but rest assured we won’t be attempting anything like that, no heads or arms at strange angles, no fake smiles, and definitely no complicated dance terminology! If you aren’t enjoying it let me know and we’ll change our method”

            I actually giggled at that as Tom took my hands and placed them where he wanted, one in his and one on his right shoulder. He placed his free hand gently on the small of my back and said “Just listen to the music and keep your eyes on mine. I promise you this isn’t as difficult as you think”

He listened for a moment to get the beat and then started to move. With his hold on me, as he stepped forward it was natural to step back and the gentle pressure from his hands made it ridiculously easy for me to anticipate changes of direction. All the time we were moving Tom was looking at me, his eyes showing pride, encouragement, love and pleasure as I did find it easier than expected to dance with him for a proper waltz. I was actually disappointed when the music stopped, though Tom pulling me in for a hug and kiss soon made up for it. “That was brilliant Darling; I even have all my toes still!”

As much as I wanted to slap him for his cheekiness I couldn’t as he had my arms too tight to get a decent swing and he knew it. “Seriously though Darling, it was really good. I could feel you letting me lead and allow yourself just to enjoy the dance. Next week we should be able to start with ‘our song’”

“Thank you Love” I said happily feeling elated that I hadn’t messed up at all. “Where did you learn to dance like that, RADA?”

“Partially” Tom admitted “but also Cranford, though I was slightly hampered there by my character being only able to use one arm!”

I sighed “I still haven’t seen that” I said forlornly.

Tom just smiled “What a coincidence that I happened to pack my copy in my bag then. I think you can guess what we are doing tomorrow.”

Now that would be interesting, watching a story I had no knowledge of except Tom’s character name and that there was at least one dance in it. “I look forward to that very much” I said. Our time being up Tom retrieved his iPod from the sound system and we left the building.


	122. Chapter 121

Arriving back home we were greeted by Lizzie who, thankfully, seemed as surprised by Tom’s appearance as I had been. We were all hungry so I got to work on the evening meal with Tom’s help and Lizzie did her homework. Food eaten and dirty dishes tidied we settled in the living room for an evening of sewing for me and telly for ‘My Pair’  
It was nice to wake up the next morning knowing Tom was around somewhere, very rarely still in bed with me, but in the vicinity was good enough. In actual fact as I ventured downstairs after throwing on some casual clothes he was just returning from his run. Hearing Lizzie in the bathroom he grimaced and joined me in the kitchen where I immediately went in for a hug, determined to make the most of the opportunity to smell my favourite odour. Tom didn’t have much of a choice but to allow it and I relished it immensely. The bathroom wasn’t occupied for too long and as Tom heard Lizzie coming down the stairs, ready for school he gently disengaged from my protracted cuddle session and went to shower and change whilst I made breakfast and made sure Lizzie had packed an adequate lunch. Breakfast over we said goodbye to Lizzie as she left to catch the bus. Tom tidied up the kitchen and made us another cup of coffee whilst I prepared to sew some more of the wedding sampler I had been commissioned to do. Coffee delivered to me safely he went upstairs to get the DVD he’d promised and put it in the player.  
I was totally shocked when I saw Cranford village as I recognised it immediately as the National Trust run village of Lacock which was only about twenty minutes along the road.  
“I didn’t realise you filmed anything so close” I said in wonder.  
“Oh yes,” he said “Lacock is beautiful. I’ve filmed in Castle Combe too, for War Horse. Of course Cranford was before Loki so I wasn’t the star but I got to work with some brilliant actors and learnt a lot”  
I ended up watching it in my usual fashion when I was sewing, concentrating more on the project than the screen except when I could hear something important happening. On this occasion however ‘something important’ translated in to every time I heard Tom’s voice. William Buxton was a wonderful character and as it was pre Loki Tom still had curly blond hair which he assured me was a pain to tame. I watched entranced as the love story between William and Peggy developed and was shot down by William’s father and Peggy’s brother but, as in all good romances true love conquered all and I finally got to see the Cranford Waltz, which was nothing like I expected but still beautiful and special.  
By now it was lunchtime and Tom got up to make some sandwiches for us both so that I could carry on sewing, he even volunteered to make the evening meal and I wasn’t about to dissuade him! Lizzie had a sleepover at Abbie’s that night. I normally frowned on those on a school night but Lizzie had pleaded her case, saying there was something they *had* to do this week and as she was away for the weekend again it had to be a school night so I had relented.  
Tom and I spent the evening doing our own thing, he was revising his script for The Night Manager, he and Hugh Laurie were also executive producers so there was a lot more work than usual involved for Tom though he seemed to be taking it all in his stride and was relishing the challenge.  
The next day saw us having actually having a relatively lazy start to the day, with no Lizzie to chivvy along we took our time and had a nice languid beginning to our weekend. Tom helped me finalise the menu for Saturday night and the Chris’. Taking into consideration all of my guests I had decided to do a nice filling lasagne with homemade chips and salad, though with the number I was serving it would end up being two so I had to remember to take my large dish to Tom’s later that day. When we’d done that Tom checked his emails and was delighted to be able to inform me that I had been accepted as his ‘plus one’ for the three award shows we had between now and the wedding. I was less enthusiastic than Tom but was already bracing myself for them. I knew Janet would be dressing me so buying something wonderful was one less thing I had to worry about. We double checked the dates and I made a note of them because Sunday late night award shows and school on Monday morning one hundred miles away really didn’t work. We were really lucky though that the members of Lizzie’s band, The Roses, parents were all very generous and would happily have Lizzie for the Sunday night and get her to school the next morning. I did feel really guilty about foisting her off onto other people to look after for me but, as Tom carefully pointed out to me, it was only for this award season. Next year we would all be in London, filming permitting and different arrangement would be in place.   
Feeling better about it all now I settled back down to my sewing, really pleased at the progress I was making, I was sure it would be finished, washed and handed over for framing well before the wedding it was intended for. That would only bolster my fledgling reputation as a designer and competent needlewoman. I was seriously considering starting a website to see if I could make it a small business to run from home. I knew I still had a large chunk of my redundancy from the factory and my inheritance from Mum and Dad was doing very nicely in its investment fund. I also knew Tom didn’t have a problem sharing his wealth with me, to the extent that I was already added to his current account and he’d gifted me a credit card which I was trying very hard not to spend too much on. He understood my need to earn a little money though, I’d had to be self-sufficient since Sean had died and I quite liked the independence I had (though not always the hard discussions that came about through having limited funds). Once I’d told Tom my tentative business idea he immediately made an appointment for me to revisit his accountants in London during February Half Term when we would be spending just a couple of days in the city. That would be the week before our wedding so how focused I would be was up for debate at the moment but Tom seemed confident of my ability to glean the important information when it mattered.


	123. Chapter 122

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, life update Hubby has a new job :-) but it means that my next major typing up week now will not happen :-( so I suppose this is me apologising if updates get sporadic for a while again. I seem to be managing once a fortnight at the moment and am hopeful I can maintain that but as usual, we will see.  
> On a lighter note I wish you and yours the best of whatever season you are celebrating right now and hope to see you all again in 2018 and thank you as always for reading

That afternoon saw Tom and I in my car picking Lizzie up from school in the same cul-de-sac that Jeff and I had picked her up from when we went to America. It was very secluded but not too far from the school, no one else used it to pick up their children so Tom could remain incognito. With Lizzie safely in the car we headed to London, the traffic being with us we made good time for a change and were pulling up outside Tom’s after just over two hours on the road.

            We followed our usual routine, Tom and I putting our clothes away and Lizzie putting the kettle on for a welcome hot drink. Very soon we were sitting on the corner sofa, enjoying each other’s company. I was still undecided what to make for pudding the next day; I wanted it to be child friendly but still grown up enough for everyone else. I realised that there was one dessert in my repertoire that would fit the bill; hazelnut cheesecake. This choice was nearly as decadent as my chocolate mousse but I decided on some small adjustments to make it less rich, though it meant that I would be going to the supermarket sooner than expected. Talking it through with Tom we reluctantly decided to swap out the hazelnut spread and the use of our favourite chocolates and replace them with plain toasted hazelnuts and some whipped cream.

            That decided and realising, yet again, that we had nothing for the evening meal in the house I made a quick but comprehensive shopping list and Tom and I headed to the local supermarket. It was mercifully quiet for a Friday evening and we were able to whizz around in relative peace. In fact the only one who paid us any attention was the cashier who did the, by now, classic double take as she realised who she was serving. What worried me more though was the way she looked at me. Tom and I weren’t trying to hide the fact that we were together, in fact I’m willing to bet that neither of us had given it a second thought but if looks could kill I would have been six foot under before I left the till! I was really unsure what to do about it, apart from trying not to show how hurt I was by her reaction. It was the first time I had personally had the hatred directed towards me, I’d seen the messages after our engagement and ‘outing’ in London of course and Lizzie kept an eye on any reaction to new pictures of us but the, admittedly, few fans I‘d met had been overwhelmingly supportive and happy that Tom had found his lasting love. I quickly decided that there was no point making a scene, it wouldn’t change her mind and would, in actual fact, cement her bad opinion of me, so that left me with the only option of ignoring her bad behaviour.

            Even though I’d handed over the cash to pay for all the food it was Tom she handed the change and receipt to, having decided that if she couldn’t get a reaction from me she would ignore me completely. Tom looked confused for a split second but covered it quickly, schooling his expression to one of polite interest as the cashier gushed to him about how much she enjoyed all of his work and how she was looking forward to seeing more as soon as it came out. Tom must have sensed me stiffening beside him as she wittered on and very politely made his farewells and we left the shop. I could feel her glare on me all the way to the door and I was extremely grateful that we didn’t have to walk along the frontage to get home.           I was quiet as we left and as soon as we were out of sight of the supermarket Tom stopped walking and put down his purchases.

Turning to me and giving me his undivided attention he said. “Do you want to tell me what that was all about?”

Putting my own bags on the floor I straightened up and shrugged “Not really!”

Tom looked at me with an expression that clearly said ‘Bad Luck Darling. I want to know’

I gave a large sigh and said “You didn’t see the way she looked at me did you?”

“Who, Darling? Tom replied, clearly puzzled.

“The cashier. Honestly Tom, if looks could kill...” I stopped not needing to continue the phrase as Tom cottoned on. A look of righteous indignation crossed his face and he made as if to march back to the store before I put a restraining arm on him “Leave it.” I said quietly “if she gets a reaction from either of us she’s won. I knew from the outset that this was a possibility, but nothing prepared me for the shock of it actually happening. Now that it has though I’m hoping it won’t affect me as much next time, because we both know there will be a next time.”

“I wish that wasn’t so” he acknowledged sadly

I huffed “Tom, Love, if wishes were horses, beggars would ride”

“True” he allowed, bending down to pick up his bags again “I am sorry though Darling” he continued as we walked.

“There’s no need for you to apologise for a fan’s behaviour, Love you’ll be apologising for them evermore if you start now. And that’s just the way it will be.” I stated “and remember what we said to each other, as long as we are happy together it doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks”

He smiled at the memory “I remember” he said “and it’s as true now as it was then”

Before long we arrived back at Tom’s and I was secretly pleased to be able to shut the bulk of the world out for the rest of the weekend. The fan’s reaction had upset me more than I let on and I was looking forward to some alone time just to process my feelings so that I could move on and deal with it better the next time it happened.

            Needing to make the biscuit base and cheesecake batter that evening I hurriedly made tea and we ate quickly. Now sated I knew I wouldn’t be tempted to snack whilst I made the cheesecake. Crushing digestive biscuits with a rolling pin was good fun, and dare I say, after my experience in the supermarket quite therapeutic. I melted the butter in a saucepan over a low heat and once it was done I added the biscuit crumbs and mixed thoroughly. I was pleasantly surprised to find Tom had spring form cake tins which would make removing the tin so much easier, thought he admitted he’d never used them as baking was not his forte but they’d come as part of a set. I lined a tin with non-stick baking parchment and then pressed the crumb mix firmly onto the base making a reasonably thick base. For the cheesecake bit I combined low fat soft cheese, hazelnut yoghurt, a small amount of softly whipped cream and gelatine together to a smooth consistency and poured it over the biscuit base. The gelatine would help the ‘batter’ set a little bit but still give a melt in the mouth texture. Placing the half-finished pudding in the fridge I vacated the kitchen so Lizzie and Tom could clean up, the quickly established rule being if you prepared a meal you didn’t have to clean up after, unless there were mitigating circumstances.

            I decided that whilst ‘My Pair’ were busy I’d try for that alone time I desired and took myself off for a relaxing bubble bath. I got a whole twenty minutes before Tom came knocking at the bathroom door. I hadn’t locked it so after hearing my invitation he opened the door and slipped in.

“Are you sure you’re OK?” he asked, his voice full of concern, even as he picked up a wash cloth and soap.

“No, but I will be” I promised “I just need to process what happened tonight, sort out my feelings and forget it.”

“Can I help?” he volunteered, eyebrow raised in classic Tom manner, holding up the now lathered flannel invitingly.

I knew he thought what he was thinking would help and I have to admit he wasn’t wrong. Being taken care of whilst my brain did its thing sounded like a wonderful idea so I nodded slowly and he proceeded to wash me gently, starting with my arms and moving onto my torso and legs as I sat and stood as necessary.

I really didn’t know what to think about the cashier. Intellectually I knew she was only the first of many. However much in love Tom and I were and couldn’t help showing it when we were together, there would always be girls and women who would think I wasn’t good enough for him and that they would be a much better fit. I hoped it would get less over the coming years but knew it would never go away completely. As a fan girl myself I knew how obsessed some of my contemporaries could be and hoped Luke had strategies in place for me should things become too difficult. For now I thought we would be OK, glares and dirty looks were just jealousy plain and simple and I could hopefully dismiss them as such. If personal details got leaked though that would be a completely different kettle of fish and we would have to react accordingly.

            On a personal level though her actions had hurt more than I thought they would. I was proud that I hadn’t reacted to her, but then it was only a look. How I would have reacted if she had voiced her objections I didn’t want to think about. How do you respond to someone telling you to your face that you shouldn’t be with the love of your life? Anything I said would be an opening for more vitriol and keeping quiet would be extremely hard. And then there was Tom, gorgeous, wonderful Tom whom I knew would leap to my defence in a heartbeat, consequences be damned, but I didn’t want to be the cause of him tarnishing his good reputation. It was all so confusing but I needed to have it straight in my head what I would do in given circumstances.

            Tom had been content to lavish affection and attention on me quietly whilst I pondered this dilemma but now he had finished with the flannel and was asking to wash my hair too. I decided that it was a case of in for a penny, in for a pound and let him. He used the detachable shower head to wet my hair first, being careful to keep the water out of my eyes. He then grabbed the bottle of my favourite shampoo and poured a generous dollop onto one hand. Rubbing his hands together gently distributed the viscous liquid evenly over his palms, which he then brought to my head and proceeded to create a lather. The feel of those long nimble fingers massaging my scalp and running though my short hair was exquisite and completely banished any residual negative thoughts as I revelled in the sensations running over my head. I shut my eyes in pure bliss and was rewarded by a soft chuckle from Tom.

“Feeling better now Darling?” he said softly, trying not to break the mood.

“Much, thank you” I replied, not even bothering to open my eyes.

Another soft sound of laughter from him and then, “Right, well I’ll rinse your hair and then we’ll get you out of the bath”

True, as always to his word he bade me tip my head back whilst he quickly and efficiently rinsed the suds out of my hair. Once that was completed I stood up and was swathed from head to foot in warm fluffy towels, a smallish one for my head and a huge bath sheet for the rest. Tom’s large hands made short work of drying me off and before long I was in my favourite pyjamas and robe and snuggled into Tom’s side on the sofa, his arm as always protectively around me as he dropped soft kisses onto my still damp hair. He’d obviously decided not to mention the incident again that night, not wanting to risk breaking the relaxed mood he’d created for which I was grateful. I actually ended up dozing off against him, waking up with a start when he shifted position slightly. The second time it happened he spoke up “Time for bed I think Darling”

I hummed happily as I shifted position myself, bed sounded good right then. Tom got up and helped me to my feet, leading me gently across the floor towards the bedroom. Throwing back the quilt I climbed in whilst Tom rushed through his nightly routine, joining me in bed scant minutes later. Seconds after that I was fully enveloped in his arms and legs, the little spoon to his big and fell asleep full of contentment.


	124. Chapter 123

The next morning saw the unusual sight of Tom and I waking up at the same time but it was ‘my’ time not his. When I asked why he hadn’t gone for his normal run he gently explained that he had tried, but every time he moved to extricate himself from me I grabbed a limb and gripped harder in my sleep. Eventually he‘d given up and fallen back to sleep next to me, vowing to go for his run when I woke up. So as soon as we were awake enough he donned his running gear and left for his daily exercise. I used the time to get the bits and pieces out for breakfast and make sure the kettle was full for hot drinks. I then spent some time agonising what to wear the evening. I’d met Hems and Elsa a couple of time now and we got on really well which was a blessing but ‘‘Chrissie’’ was an unknown quantity, and I had a need to make a good impression but also wanted to feel comfortable so eventually settled on one of my favourite long flowing skirts, a heavy cotton instead of the more usual viscose and a skin tight thin jumper. That was just sorted when I heard Tom’s key in the door and I went to boil the kettle and sort everyone for breakfast.

            Once we’d eaten and loaded the dishwasher Tom and Lizzie took their by now familiar routine and spruced up the living accommodation whilst I got the spare blankets and pillows to make a ‘nest’ for the twins in case they needed a nap at any point, which I suspected they would. Chores completed we met again in the main room and flopped down on the sofa, we were well versed in these meals now and with the lasagne being easy to do and only the decorating to do on the cheesecake we had time to relax. Well I say relax, Tom took the time to check his emails and confirm start times and venues for the three award shows we had coming up. He also contacted his dresser, Janet, to arrange a day for her to go to Wiltshire and help me with the dresses I required. When she answered the phone she insisted on having a discussion with me about my likes and dislikes to try and narrow down the selection of gowns she would bring with her. Tom was listening intently to my side of the conversation and gave me a quizzical look when I giggled when Janet stated that she would make me look gorgeous and that Tom would have to dress to compliment me, as I felt sure it would have been the other way around. Janet assured me that she had a thorough knowledge of all Tom’s suits and if he didn’t have one to flatter my gown there were plenty of designers in London who would all fall over themselves to dress him to her specification. Janet made it sound so much fun that I actually found myself looking forward to these shows now instead of dreading them as I had been. By the time Janet rang off we had a day arranged for her to come to the cottage and Tom had volunteered to cook lunch for us as well.

            It was time for me to start cooking the lasagne so I toddled off to the kitchen again. I added onions and lean mince to a saucepan and fried them until all the mince was brown. I added finely chopped carrots, peppers, celery and then a can of chopped tomatoes, a beef stock cube, a healthy shake of Italian seasoning, and then my secret ingredient, a small pinch of ground cinnamon and ground nutmeg. The whole lot simmered for twenty minutes whilst I made a classic cheese sauce, no healthy swaps here though, nothing really tastes the same on lasagne as a proper cheese sauce.

            Once both sauces were done it was just a case of doing the layering using dried lasagne sheets. When they were ready for the oven I peeled some large potatoes and cut them into chunky chips, they were boiled for five minutes, drained and dried thoroughly on absorbent kitchen towel before being laid in a single layer on a large baking sheet, ready for cooking in the oven, not for the first time I was glad that Tom had a big oven squeezed in to his small kitchen. The salad was easy to do and looked really colourful with pale green lettuce leaves, grated carrot, sweetcorn kernels and pomegranate seeds.

            It was then time to get ready for our guests, and now our routine worked well, helped by the fact that we had two bathrooms of course. Tom was in his usual uniform for a casual night out, smart black trousers, white shirt and black waistcoat, I wore my previously picked outfit and Lizzie was wearing a beautiful black velvet skirt and a blouse that was all vibrant colours and geometric designs.

            Hems had already text Tom to tell him they were meeting up with ‘‘Chrissie’’ outside so there was no need for him to go down and greet them, Hems being familiar enough with both the procedure and the door staff to be allowed in. We were not waiting too long before the doorbell rang and we stood to greet our guests. Tom opened the door and braced himself subtly, fully expecting a careening India to launch herself at him and she did indeed come running through the door but she spared Tom and I barely a glance as she headed at full speed towards Lizzie! Luckily she had realised what was happening a split second after Tom and managed to catch India before being knocked over herself.

            Turning away from India’s personal reunion with her friend I paid attention to the scene in front of me. Hems and Elsa were looking proudly at the girls; apparently this was a big thing for India. She’d been chattering in the car non-stop since she realised where they were heading that day, so excited to see ‘Izzie’ again. As is usual in little people, four and a half months had made a huge difference in all aspects of India’s development but I was amused to hear her still call Lizzie ‘Izzie’. Predictably the girls soon headed to Lizzie’s bedroom but not before collecting a small bag from Hems. “My dollies” India announced happily and off they went again. finally dragging our focus back to the others I smiled to see Hems and Elsa cradling Tristan and Sasha who had grown considerably and were alert and looking around with considerable interest. We managed awkward sideways hugs around the twins and then Hems and Elsa stepped aside revealing ‘‘Chrissie’’.            

            I promptly burst out laughing at the sight of a man, who I already knew was single with no children laden down with more baby paraphernalia than I’d ever seen one person carry before. A huge nappy bag was hanging on one shoulder, with a couple of foldable children’s chairs under that arm. A long rectangular object was in his other hand and over his other shoulder was yet another bag! Finding a clear space he deposited it all gently on the floor and came over to greet me properly.

“You must be the famous Jackie” he said with a big smile “I’m Chris or I’ll answer to Evans or ‘‘Chrissie’’ apparently if Robert has anything to do with it!”

“Well I don’t know about famous” I replied “but yes, I’m Jackie and it’s a pleasure to meet you properly at last. I’m afraid my daughter has already been appropriated by India so I’ll have to introduce you to her later.”

He smiled “Yes India can be a bit forceful in her demands but she’s a good kid.”

“She is” I agreed smiling at Hems and Elsa as I did “a credit to her parents.”

            We’d made our way to the sofa and arranged ourselves comfortably, the twins on the rug and a blanket with loads of soft toys and us all cooing over them. Leaving Tom to do the entertaining for a bit I excused myself to the kitchen to start cooking the lasagne and put the finishing touches to the cheesecake. I’d toasted some hazelnuts earlier in the day chopping some a food processer and leaving some whole for decoration, I’d also whipped some cream so all I had to do was pipe rosettes on top of the dessert. I put some pieces of flaky chocolate between the swirls, sprinkled the chopped hazelnuts over the top and placed a whole hazelnut on alternate swirls of cream. It looked brilliant when I’d finished. The timing was good too because it was now time to put the chips in the oven too, after giving them a liberal spray of low calorie cooking spray they were due to be cooked in twenty minutes.


	125. Chapter 124

            I grabbed a couple of bottle of wine and some glasses and re-joined the adults. Tom sorted everyone out for drinks and when he realised I’d forgotten my apple juice rushed to get me one. We sat for a while, the Chris’ and Tom discussing the reshoots that had finally finished the day before leaving everyone free to resume their normal lives again.

Our meal was soon ready and Tom went to get the girls. It was as this point India realised she hadn’t said ‘Hello’ to Tom yet and came back on his hip, talking nineteen to the dozen, Lizzie following behind. Chris had taken the opportunity to reveal the contents of the strange oblong item ‘Chrissie’ had carried in. Removing the cover revealed a collapsible travel cot which expanded to give the twins a safe space to play in whilst we ate. As before India insisted on sitting next to Lizzie and we arranged ourselves around them. We made sure to keep some lasagne and chips back for the twins but the rest was soon demolished which was a huge boost to my ego as I always worried the food wasn’t good enough. India managed quite well, with Lizzie anticipating her needs as before, which still came as a shock to me, to see her so grown up.

            We chatted whilst we ate, trading childhood stories and more recent misadventures, thankfully Tom didn’t mention the incident at the supermarket and I kept quiet about it as well, although I knew my guests would understand I didn’t think it was an appropriate subject for a nice evening in, especially when trying to get to know people. We were still full from our meal and so Chris and Elsa decided to feed the twins, Lizzie gave up her chair so that the twins could have a chair each and Elsa and I set up the folding high chairs on them. The lasagne and chips had cool sufficiently for the boys and Hems and Elsa patiently fed them lasagne whilst Tristan and Sasha attempted to feed themselves the chips, or anything else they could get in their mouths. The boys finished their meal with a small pot of yoghurt each and it fell to Lizzie and ‘Chrissie’ to feed them with very differing results. Sasha whom Lizzie was feeding ended up with substantially more in his mouth than Tristan, who seemed to think that grabbing the spoon anytime it came near, was how you ate! The two novices were happy to hand back to the experts as soon as they could and Elsa and I had the twins clean again in next to no time.

            When I felt ready to stomach more food I went and got the cheesecake and small plates to serve it on from the kitchen, whilst Tom and Hems put the twins back in their travel cot and reclaimed the chairs. I was very gratified to see everyone’s eyes light up in anticipation as I bore my creation to the table. This was a dessert I hadn’t made for Tom before so he was as in the dark as everyone else as to how it would taste. Serving our guests first I soon had it distributed, even India had a small slice which she insisted had to have chocolate and a nut on it, luckily that was fairly easy to accommodate . Judging by the appreciative hums coming from around the table the cheesecake was a resounding success and I was reasonably sure no one realised it wasn’t quite as decadent as it tasted. Soon there were only crumbs left on the serving plate and everyone was replete.

            Tom and Hems cleared the table, Hems obviously feeling very at home, and between them they made after dinner coffee for any who wanted it. We sat, once again on the sofa cradling our mugs in our hands. ‘Chrissie’ had some questions about the meet and greet which we were able to answer for him and not long after that our guests decided that it was late and they needed to get home. I found myself wondering where on earth all the time had gone as I realised how late it was, I mean it wasn’t indecent but taking into consideration India and the twins, it was late enough. I had managed to cross another thing off my wedding ‘to do’ list though, Elsa and I had arranged to go dress shopping for India the Saturday of Tom’s birthday weekend, which was good for me as I was hoping she’d give me some ideas as I didn’t have a clue what to get him.

            It was relatively simple to gather up all the bits and pieces Hems and Elsa had brought with them and with everyone bundled up in warm coats and snowsuits as appropriate we all made our way down to the lobby, each one of us carrying something so ‘Chrissie’ didn’t have to struggle down the stairs as he must have struggled up. We said proper goodbyes in the lobby and I got a kiss on the cheek from both the Chris’ and a hug from India, who was very nearly asleep in Tom’s arms, and Elsa. Tom went with our guests to their cars, ‘Chrissie’ having called for a taxi when we knew what time they’d be leaving. We knew we’d be seeing him again very soon as he was going to the BAFTA’s, as were Robert and Mark apparently. Those were being held the day before Tom’s 34th birthday and I could see the celebrations starting early, at the after party, without too much effort. We waved everyone off and repaired back upstairs to tidy away the detritus and head to bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the short chapter this week but real life has been horrible to me for the past two weeks and this was all I could manage. Hopefully normal service will be resumed soon *fingers toes and all other appendages crossed!*


	126. Chapter 125

           We didn’t stay in London long the following day, only long enough to have breakfast and tidy it away before we headed back to the cottage in Wiltshire. Janet was due on Tuesday to give her time to get stuff together and I was hopeful that we’d manage to find suitable outfits for all three award shows in one attempt as I wouldn’t have a lot of spare time in the run up to the wedding obviously. In fact the more I looked at the upcoming month and everything we were trying to cram in I would be happy beyond measure if I got to the wedding with my sanity intact.

            It was a quick turnaround again when we got to the cottage, I’d made a rough shopping list in the car on the way, with Tom adding what he thought he’d need for Tuesday so I only stayed long enough to refine the details and headed out again, leaving Tom and Lizzie to unpack and settle in. I don’t think I’d ever been so grateful for Sunday trading as I’d been recently I mused as I made the short journey to the nearest town with a large supermarket. Being familiar with the layout I was able to complete a week’s shop in record time and manage to find something nice for us to have for tea as well. I headed back, happy with my success and desperate for a cup of coffee. Lizzie had disappeared to her room to finish homework and get ready for the next morning and to my surprise Tom had managed to get some laundry going.

            He had that preoccupied look on his face again so I made my coffee and waited patiently for him to bring up whatever he thought would worry me next. Astonishingly it didn’t take long for him to speak, he was obviously getting better at not worrying so much about upsetting me with unwelcome news, knowing I’d probably take it in my stride anyway, but it was rather adorable to see the struggle on his face.

“Mum phoned whilst you were shopping” he said eventually.

“Oh yes” I replied “is she OK?”

“She’s fine” answered Tom “she was hoping to speak with you actually so she’s going to phone again later this evening”

“OK” I said slowly, unsure as to why Diana phoning would have such an effect on Tom “did she say what she wanted?”

‘The look’ flitted across Tom’s face briefly as he contemplated his answer “Yes” he said finally “she’s wondering whether she should come here the week before the wedding to lend a hand and be a support for you. You know, helping with those things your mum would normally do. But she said it’s totally up to you, I’m going to be busy at Eddington Court for a large part of the week with the meet and greet as you know so it might be good for you to have someone else to rely on”

            In all honesty that was the last thing I’d been expecting. My first reaction was ‘Yes’ Diana and I got on really well and it would be nice to have someone around who would know Tom’s opinion on things if it came up. I could understand her hesitancy though, although I was a grown woman and this was my second marriage I would have still wanted, and to be honest, expected my mum to be a near constant presence in the week leading up to the wedding, notwithstanding the fact that up until their deaths I lived with my parents anyway. I knew that Diana didn’t want me to think that she was usurping the memory of my mum and the plain truth was that she would be a great help and also be sensitive to my emotional state.

Mind made up I turned to Tom and said “Of course your Mum can come and stay. I’ll tell her later when she phones”

             A look of relief crossed Tom’s face; did he think I’d deny him the chance to spend quality time with his mum just because I couldn’t spend time with mine? I sincerely hoped not. Diana had welcomed Lizzie and I into their family from the very start and I wasn’t about to turn her away anytime soon. We’d been busy putting away the groceries as we spoke and my coffee seemed to have gone down without touching the sides so we boiled the kettle again and had a more leisurely cuppa.

             I’d decided on an easy tea, there had been some lovely gammon joints in the supermarket and served with baked potatoes and mixed veg it made for a filling meal. I’d cheated with dessert though, and indulged in one of my favourite bought puddings, shop bought berry strudel with lots of piping hot custard. We spent the evening relaxing in front of the telly; well I was sewing again so relaxing is a relative word.

            Diana phoned as she’d promised and seemed overjoyed when I invited her to spend the week before the wedding at the cottage. After she’d made sure she wasn’t imposing at least three times we established that she would arrive the Saturday just before the Oscars, meaning our Oscar party of two was now three as Tom was determined to stay up late to see if Benedict won an Oscar for his portrayal of Alan Turing. Actually it was a win/win situation for Tom as Benedict was up against Eddie Redmayne for his portrayal of Steven Hawking. Tom had gone to Eton with Eddie who was a year behind him and although they didn’t have a strong friendship like Ben and Chris had with Tom they moved in the same circles and saw enough of one another to be on each other’s Christmas card list. Diana made a point in our conversation of reiterating that she wasn’t coming to be entertained, anything we were doing was fine and she’d even do school runs if necessary.

            The next day saw me frantically cleaning the spare room in preparation for Janet’s arrival the following morning. It wasn’t too dirty but hadn’t been touched in a little while and I hated the thought of any lovely dresses that came to Wiltshire going back in less than perfect condition. Cleaning that one room inevitably led to the whole house being done, having Tom around to move furniture being an added bonus! It took all day but I was pleased with the results when I finally flopped down on the sofa that evening. Tom had cooked, using it as an excuse to learn his way around my kitchen so he wouldn’t have to keep interrupting Janet and I the next day with simple ‘Where is?’ requests and I was happy to let him. As therapeutic as I found cooking, loving to prepare even simple meals from scratch for the healthier option, it was nice to have someone to do it for a change, Lizzie being more of a baker than a cook.

            We went for a walk after eating, a simple pleasure that I had foregone for far too long. There were still parts of the village and its history that Tom was unaware of and it was a real pleasure to be able to fill him in on the history, both local and more personal. My family had been in the village for one hundred and thirty five years so I was steeped in the old stories and Tom was a very attentive audience. Arriving back home we snuggled on the sofa, not saying much, just content to be in each other’s company for a moment of peace.


	127. Chapter 126

Janet arrived bang on time the next morning, Tom helping her unload what seemed like an entire wardrobe full of clothes in covers, his face clearly showing his anticipation of the day, as he was grinning hugely every time he traipsed up the stairs with his arms full. For my part I hadn’t expected anywhere near that number of dresses and gowns and was beginning to wonder what exactly I’d let myself in for. It was only my desire not to let Tom down on occasions that meant a lot to him personally and professionally that kept me focussed. As in August when we’d done the interview and I’d been introduced to the fans as Tom’s fiancée I wanted to keep my own style (such as it was) to the forefront and was determined that if I didn’t like an outfit I wasn’t wearing it for anybody.

            I’d put the kettle on whilst Janet and Tom were transferring the large number of dress covers and by the time they’d finished I was ready to make us all a hot drink. We sat in the living room to discuss a plan of action and to my surprise Janet produced hardback notebook from the depths of her handbag along with a pen.

Seeing my curious look she said “I do this for all my clients, make notes on their preferences. Saves me having to try and remember it all. I’m putting you in with Tom as you will most likely only need my services when he’s involved somewhere so I can cross reference easy” She was very organised and it actually put me at ease a bit, knowing that she genuinely cared about how people felt wearing the clothes she picked out.

            Tom and Janet explained that as the Falstaff Awards were slightly less formal than the BAFTA’s we would dress accordingly. I was pleased that I got to ease into this strange part of Tom’s world. He would be expected to wear a smart suit for the Falstaff’s, and would have a little leeway in colour and accessories but the BAFTA’s were tuxedo territory so my outfit would be that much smarter. Knowing more what to expect now Janet and I went upstairs to try and see what we could sort out. Tom stayed downstairs, his clothing practically chosen for him, but I knew he was looking forward to a small fashion parade from yours truly as he had confided that to me only that morning.

            I openly gasped when I saw inside the spare room; the last time I’d seen that many gowns together with the possibility of me wearing one was when I was picking my first wedding dress. It looked like a rainbow had landed and shaken its colour everywhere. There were shades from the palest yellow to the deepest blue and I was enraptured. Some of the dresses I was put off right away just from how they looked on the hanger, dresses that I deemed too short were dismissed as were dresses that were too bright. I wasn’t against bright colours but I tended to wear smaller amounts of them, a cerise top was fine but a full length cerise ball gown was definitely out. Janet was beautifully patient with me as I rejected out of hand at least half the dresses she had picked out for me.

“Its fine Jackie” she said as I literally turned my nose up at a short scarlet number that I wouldn’t be seen dead in “It’s important to Tom and I that you feel comfortable in what you are wearing. I know from experience there’s nothing worse than spending an evening trying to either pull your skirt down enough or stop yourself falling out of the top of something” she smiled as she took the offending garment to the ‘No’ pile which was a lot bigger than the ‘Maybe’ pile at this point, and we were only on the first sort through!

            I seemed drawn towards the darker colours, wine reds, deep blues and dark bottle greens predominated along with slate greys and sumptuous purples with nothing shorter than mid-calf length. Skirts varied in volume though from large gowns that looked like they needed lots of petticoats underneath to the sheath dresses that looked like they would hug my curves tightly, sleeve length too varied, nothing completely strapless but there were a couple of asymmetric bodice dresses that had one shoulder completely uncovered. I wasn’t sure about them, though I’d seen plenty of women wearing similar at celebrity events and on the right figure they looked stunning, but I was reminding myself that all my shows were being held in February, not traditionally the warmest time of year in England and I wasn’t sure I could cope with even one bare shoulder.

            First sort out completed we then started trying on the ‘maybes’. I opted to start with a full ball gown, wanting to know if the traditional princess look was for me, and if it wasn’t it would get the disappointment out of the way and then the only way would be up. I stepped carefully into the skirt and shimmied the bodice upwards. The fabric felt gorgeous against my skin and as I slid my arms into the sleeves caressed my arms beautifully too. Janet was behind me, doing up the fastenings and I was looking in a full length mirror. I was pleased to see that the dress shape did seem to suit me.

“I like this one” I said to Janet casually

“Yes, it’s nice isn’t it?” she replied “It’s Dior of course!”

I was shocked “Dior!” I stuttered “As in Christian Dior?”

Janet was non plussed “Yes of course Christian Dior”

I was panicking a little now “But, but I can’t afford this, and I won’t let Tom pay for it. Have you got anything more in my price range?”

Janet came round to stand in front of me a very sympathetic expression on her face “Oh Jackie, you’re so sweet. Most of these dresses are on loan, some I can sell you but most are on loan”

“Loan?” I said weakly

Janet, once again took pity on me “Loan” she confirmed “All the designers know who I dress and when I started asking for dresses and gowns as well as suits they put two and two together remarkably quickly and fell over themselves to offer things. Their creations being seen with Tom will do their reputation no harm at all in fact” and here she leaned in conspiratorially “some of them would be beside themselves if they saw one of their creations in the papers the next day!”

            Her little speech had done three things, calmed my fears about how I would pay for these gorgeous gowns, made me realise why Tom didn’t have quite as many suits as I’d seen pictures of, and finally and most embarrassingly for me, highlighted just how much I had to learn about Tom’s world. I never knew gowns and suits would be loaned to the celebrity wearing them just so they could get media coverage but the more I thought about it the more it made sense.

Seeing my discomfort Janet put her arm around my shoulders “Don’t worry Jackie, you’re not the first to realise the practicalities of the life you are joining and you certainly won’t be the last” she tapped a free finger to her nose and added “I won’t tell Tom if you don’t”

I nodded gratefully, I didn’t want him to think me as naive as I realised I must be.

“So” Janet was all brisk and business like again “How about we go and show him. Yes?”

I nodded happily, anxious now to show off and maybe preen just a little bit. This was definitely going to be a day of firsts I mused as I had to pick up the skirts to negotiate the stairs. Janet had preceded me so as not to step on my skirts and as I turned into the living room proper both she and Tom were standing, looking towards the entrance way expectantly.

I stepped in to the room dropping the skirts as I did so and when I had the room did a slow turn so Tom could appreciate the dress from all angles. Watching his face transform as he saw me for the first time in something gorgeous would never get old. A huge smile spread across his face as he took in the sight before him.

“Oh Darling” he exclaimed “you just keep getting more beautiful”

“Oh shush you” I retorted “You’re just saying that to see if you can make me blush again!”

“I am” he admitted “it’s true though and the fact that my ruse is working is just a bonus”

Janet was shaking her head with a fond expression on her face “You two never change, do you? It’s London all over again”

“Nope” said Tom, totally unapologetic “how we behave in private is no one’s business but ours and if we want to be overly affectionate well so be it”

“Quite right too” Janet agreed “I know you well enough now Tom to understand your character but I’ve never seen you quite this happy before”

“I’ve never been this happy before” Tom responded “and it’s all down to Jackie, and Lizzie of course. I know it’s a terrible cliché but I honestly didn’t realise I was missing something until I found it”

“I know what you mean” Janet agreed “when you find ‘the one’ for you it is wonderful. Anyway back to business at hand. I was thinking of this for the BAFTAs?

Tom nodded approvingly as I looked down at the deep burgundy gown with full floor length skirts and a long sleeved fitted bodice and tried to imagine myself amongst the best acting talent in the world. I knew I would feel out of place but I supposed the trick was not to show it. Janet made a note in her book and bustled me off upstairs to try on some more dresses. The next couple of choices were not such a hit, dresses that looked lovely on the hanger just looked wrong on me though luckily they weren’t ones that I’d had my heart set on. The forth dress was a vast improvement, a dark royal blue velvet, mid-calf number with a cross over bodice and, again, long sleeves. It fitted like a glove and I knew Tom would love me in it. From the look on Janet’s face she knew it too.

“Show Tom?” we said simultaneously and then giggled

“That would be a yes then” I chuckled and waited for her to precede me downstairs again.

Tom emerged from the kitchen this time, having decided to make a start on food. I wasn’t entirely sure what he was concocting and there were no enticing aromas as yet so I guessed it was still a work in progress. I did another slow twirl so he could see the whole deal and when I was facing him again he was smiling, which was always a good sign.

“You’re definitely having that one” he said emphatically and then turning to Janet he said “That one is available to purchase isn’t it?”

“It is” she confirmed “and with the right accessories we can ring the changes to make it different every time”

“Brilliant” Tom responded “please put it and anything else on my account”

He looked at me then, daring me to contradict him but I was quickly learning how to pick my battles and his face on this occasion told me that he would not be swayed so I said simply “Thank you so much, Love”

“No thanks needed Darling, you deserve to be spoiled and I fully intend to make the most of every opportunity offered to me”

Janet leaned in and stage whispered to me “I’d quit while I’m ahead if I were you Jackie” Tom smiled as I nodded my agreement and turned to go upstairs again.


	128. Chapter 127

I tried on a few more dresses and refined what colours I really liked which luckily for me also coincided with colours that worked for me as I wanted to be able to vaguely enjoy any pictures of me that made it to the media and it would help that if I didn’t hate what I was wearing.

            The last dress chosen, the one I would wear to the WhatsOnStage Awards was a royal purple sheath dress with a slit from the knee to the floor length hem, cap sleeves and a fitted bodice, the body of which was covered with a fine flowery black lace and the join was covered by a black and silver glittery belt. It was gorgeous, though something I’d never have thought about wearing before. I suppose being with Tom was having a positive effect on my confidence. I looked at myself in the mirror hardly recognising the woman staring back at me; she was beautiful and stylish with soft features, blue eyes and short brown hair. She was also less than a week away from accompanying Tom to her first major awards show and didn’t look worried at all. ‘It must be the clothes’ I thought to myself ‘they’re the reason you feel so confident’ I wasn’t totally sure I believed myself though. The truth however was undeniable; the me of a year ago would probably run screaming from the room if someone had suggested to her that she would be putting herself on show to the world at the BAFTAs.

“Another one for Tom?” Janet said quietly, trying not to scare me out of my reverie.

I still jumped slightly as Janet spoke but answered calmly “I think so, though you know I value your opinion too”

“I know” Janet responded kindly “but I’m not the one who will be with you on the red carpet by your side so his opinion matters as well.”

We made our way downstairs again and this time the enticing smell coming from the kitchen hit me halfway down the stairs and I sniffed appreciatively.

“I didn’t know Tom was so adept in the kitchen” Janet remarked as we continued down.

“Oh yes” I responded “well he can’t keep that trim figure and live on take out now, can he?”

“I suppose not” Janet mused “Lucky you, he’s gorgeous and can cook, you’ve got it made!”

“Funny thing” I said giggling slightly “he says the same about me!”

“See” said Janet sagely “it was meant to be”

On hearing our voices Tom emerged from the kitchen once more “That one’s beautiful Darling” he exclaimed losing the distance between us and pulling me in for a quick kiss.

“Well, to be fair Love, I have only shown you the ones I really like, the rest range from ‘so-so’ to ‘never in a month of Sundays’!”

Tom chucked at my words “It’s easier when the lady knows what she likes isn’t it Janet?”

“It certainly is Tom” she smiles “and working with someone who doesn’t want to look ridiculous is a bonus too. Now what are you doing about make up on those days Jackie?”

I was suddenly flummoxed, I had no idea! I could do passable make up for a night out but this was a completely different kettle of fish.

Seeing my hesitation Tom spoke up again “I’ve already arranged for someone to come and do Jackie’s make up on those days, one less thing to worry about Darling” he said looking directly at me with love writ large on his face.

“Well that’s a relief” I chuckled “it wouldn’t look too good now would it if I was dressed up to the nines but looked like an amateur had done the makeup which would have been the result if left to my own devices”

“Oh Jackie” Tom chided “you’re not that rubbish, honest”

“So it’s just shoes and jewellery to worry about then” said Janet, all business-like again.

“I’ve got jewellery covered” Tom spoke up again “and before you say anything Darling, you don’t actually get a say in this. If I want to spoil you, I will!”

I held up a thumb and forefinger a small distance apart “OK, just this once, and only this much!”

“Hmm. We’ll see” was his only response.

“Right Jackie” Janet said briskly before I could offer Tom a retort “let’ go upstairs and get you out of that one and then we can look at shoes and any accessories. The trouble is with three events so close together you can’t really get away with wearing the same thing twice”

“More’s the pity” I said under my breath. I really didn’t see the point of spending a small fortune on an outfit for a couple of hours however stunning I looked in it, and suddenly I saw the appeal of renting or borrowing a dress for a night.

“Well we’ll look through your stuff and see what we can do. I have a box of tricks with me and we may just surprise everyone” Janet said as we headed upstairs again.

            I slipped out of the purple dress and put back on my jeans and blouse from earlier, feeling totally underdressed. Janet swiftly put all the dresses away and turned her attention to my meagre collection of shoes and accessories.

“Right, which are your favourite shoes?” she asked, eyeing them all critically. I pointed out a pair of flat patent black ballerina pumps with no adornment.

“Ok” she said “and now your favourite heels?”

That was easy too. I really didn’t like heels but knew that they helped with the height difference between Tom and myself so I’d purchased a pair of 3” nude heels as I’d noticed they seemed to be a staple of many women whose pictures ended up in the media.

“Good choice” Janet praised “they will go with anything and you can walk in them OK?”

“Well enough” I agreed “wouldn’t want to do miles though”

“Good job miles won’t be necessary then, though comfort most definitely is!”

“I thought it might be” I shrugged “I’ll manage for one night and see how I go”

Janet then got her box of tricks and after a short rummage around produced two thin black patent straps and a couple of small bows which she deftly affixed to the ballerina pumps completely changing the look. I was astounded, and Janet saw that so clearly in my face.

“One of my little secrets for my female clients, a comfortable pair of shoes is a must in this world and a few simple adornments can make a single pair look like four if you’re clever. I always think the men have it easier, especially in the footwear department, one pair of smart black brogues looks much like another”

“So true” I said ruefully “”though Tom seems to have a good selection”

“Yes well” Janet smirked “Tom is generally a rule all on his own! There’s no one else quite like him around at the moment”

“I know” I smiled “my own little bit of perfection”

“Don’t let him hear you say that” Janet cautioned “we don’t want him getting an ego, I happen to like him just the way he is!”

“Don’t let him hear you say what?” Tom’s voice came from the doorway behind us making both of us jump.

I wheeled round “Tom!” I squeaked “how long have you been there?!”

He gave me a look so reminiscent of a certain Trickster God and in His voice intoned “Wouldn’t you like to know? Did I hear you say something you are obviously embarrassed over or not?” he chuckled darkly, the question being rhetorical. Before I could think through my action I’d made a fist and thumped him hard on his upper arm for making me jump like that.

“Ow!” he said, breaking character instantly “I didn’t hear you say anything incriminating, I promise!”

“Good” I responded “and long may that continue!”

“Anyway” Tom said “I only popped up to tell you that food will be ready in about ten minutes”

“Thank you Tom” Janet and I chorused “we’ll be down very soon.”

Tom gave us one of his trademark smiles and turned to go back downstairs

As soon as I heard him at the foot of the stairs I turned to Janet “Do you think he heard me?”

“I don’t think so” she replied “he was just messing with you; you know he has a great sense of humour?”

I sighed “Yes I do. Handbags after lunch then I suppose?”

“Yes, it won’t take long but I have to admit I’m feeling hungry and that food definitely smells good” Janet said, all but licking her lips.

“Me too. Come on let’s go and see what we’ve got waiting for us”

We headed downstairs. Tom had kept things simple and it was the kitchen table that he’d laid for three. I was pleasantly surprised to see a small vase of flowers in the middle of the table which added a welcome splash of colour to an otherwise drab January day.

“Ah Ladies” Tom said as he caught sight of us in the doorway “Do come in, I’m nearly ready to serve, its pork and apple stew with baked potatoes. I hope that’s alright?”

“It sounds wonderful Love, and smells delicious” I said inhaling deeply to prove my point “I was wondering what you’d come up with”

“We’d better not let it get cold then” Tom responded, gesturing to the table “Take a seat and I’ll get the food”

We sat down as directed and Tom was there immediately with a small serving dish of baked potatoes and then he returned with a bigger one full of the most appetising smelling stew. As he lifted the lid of the dish I could see that the stew was jam packed with carrots, celery, swede and apples with bite sized chunks of pork all in fragrant gravy. As we served ourselves Tom added “There should be enough left for Lizzie’s tea too, seemed silly to cook twice in a day if we didn’t need to”

“Brilliant idea” I assured him “Lizzie will love it I’m sure” as I was speaking I was filling my fork and the repast tasted as good as it smelt. We cleared our plates in no time and after a quick coffee Janet and I went back upstairs to finish off. Suitable handbags proved slightly more difficult to find than shoes had been. The only suitable bag I had was the black clutch I’d bought to go with the black dress I’d worn to the London opening night of the play that brought us together.

Janet didn’t seem overly worried though, even when her box of tricks failed to find anything to make it over with “Don’t worry Jackie; I know I can get suitable bags for you. It’s not like you need to put much in them anyway. Now small over the shoulder or clutch?”

 

“I honestly don’t know” I said “just something that won’t show nail marks when they dig in in my nervousness”

Janet smiled at my stipulation “You will be fine. You will have one of the most attentive men I have ever met on your arm. He won’t let you down I can assure you. And Luke will be at all of these events too, won’t he?

I simple nodded. I assumed Luke would be there in some capacity but to be honest I hadn’t had it confirmed or denied by either man and this was one of the time checking the ‘star phone’ wouldn’t help because the events were on there anyway and I already knew that it didn’t specify who was attending, just that there was something on so please try not to disturb during the times stated.

“Well there you are then” Janet finished briskly “nothing to worry about! Right well I think we’re done here. I’ve made notes and nothing needs adjusting to fit you, you lucky thing so I’ll just make sure that everything is delivered to Tom’s during the week before they are needed”

“We’ll be here for most of those weeks though” I blurted out

“Prosper then” Janet said smoothly “You can coordinate with Luke about picking them up or having them delivered as appropriate. I’m sure he won’t mind”

“I’m sure he won’t either” I said, thinking of the genial man I hadn’t seen for a little while now.

“Right, that’s settled then” she said happily as she busied herself packing away her bits and pieces. When she was done we both grabbed armfuls of dresses and headed downstairs. As soon as Tom saw us he jumped up off the sofa and took the armful from Janet and took it to her car ‘See’ she mouthed at me ‘Attentive’ I just smiled at her as I carried my own load to the car. I took another trip each to get everything packed and I made sure to let her know how grateful I was before she left.

            Just before she got in her car to return to London she gave me a very pointed look and said “Tom has my number Jackie. If there is anything you think you need to discuss with me about what we have spoken about please feel free to call and I’ll do what I can to help”

“Thank you Janet” I said sincerely “I hope I won’t need to but it’s nice to know that I can”

            Tom was watching our exchange with interest and then turned his attention to Janet to wave as she got in her car and drove up the lane. Focussing on me again as we re-entered the cottage he asked “Do I want to know what you two were conspiring about?”

“Probably not” I said as nonchalantly as I could manage. I didn’t think I was fooling him really. It was a major part of his job, to be able to read people but he thankfully didn’t say anymore and we went into the kitchen and cleaned up from lunch together


End file.
